Andie sat in her window seat, sniffling quietly to herself, while holding a butterfly-shaped pillow to her chest. She was angry. She didn't care about being sent to her room. She knew the only reason Eric did that was because he couldn't stand her. At least-that's what she was mostly sure of. And that's why she was angry.

Since Eric's arrival, he had expressed very little interest in her. It hurt her, because she felt so terribly alone, but she accepted it. At least until tonight, when the step-brother who seemed to loath her so much waited up for her because he was worried.

Eric was actually concerned for her. It was almost too good to be true. His anger at her late arrival sparked something warm inside her heart; something that had been missing since her parents died.

Somebody-anybody-actually cared about her.

...And then he sent her to her room.

If his intentions came from a place of discipline, then she would probably feel that same spark igniting in her heart, because that would mean he cared enough about her to correct her.

But Andie knew that wasn't the case.

Eric sent her to her room with a face void of care and love. He just couldn't stand her. She had intruded on his calm evening and made him worry for absolutely no reason and he was angry with her for it.

It was pathetic how desperately Andie wanted his attention and his care. She would go to her room a thousand times of he demanded it if it meant he cared about her. She just wanted to feel some semblance of normalcy in her sixteen-year-old life, and that normalcy came in the form of being told to go to her room, and aruging with him about her whereabouts, because that's what teenagers did with their guardians. And for a moment, she had it. Eric had ordered her to her room and for the tiniest of seconds, she felt the normalcy she had been craving, the care and attention and devotion that came with having a guardian who wanted you to do better, who expected better.

And then it was gone when his eyes betrayed how much he disliked her.

That was the truth that mercilessly stared her down; Eric just didn't like her.

The next morning saw very little interaction between she and Eric; as always. They past each other in the hall, they stood next to each other in the kitchen, they collected their clothes from the dryer simultaneously, and never did the events from the night before come up.

As she slipped from the house in her school uniform, tugging her hair into a ponytail as she closed the door behind her, it was just like any other day. It was as if last night never happened.

Four blocks and ten minutes later and Andie was arriving at school where her longest friend, Morgan, waited at the steps. When she spotted Andie she jumped up and closed the short distance between them in hurried strides.

"Oh my God, you're alive?"

"Were you expecting Eric to actually do something about my tardiness last night?" Andie replied sourly, shaking her head in response to her friend's question as she climbed the steps up to the school's front doors. "He could have cared less, Morgan."

"That's so weird," replied Morgan, clearly disheartened for her friend.

It wasn't their intention to stay out late last night, and by the time they realized how terribly late it was, Morgan was sure that Eric was going to be aboslutely livid with his little step-sister.

"I was so sure he'd be a little upset with you..." Morgan sympathized with Andie, knowing how desperately she yearned for some semblance of care from her step-brother.

"He was. He was mad at me for intruding on his quiet evening. He was very mad that I kept him up waiting for me. When I tried to act all nonchalant about it, he sent me to my room."

"Wait-" Morgan halted in her tracks, yanking on Andie's arm and forcing her to a stop. "He sent you to your room?"

"Shhh!" It was Andie's turn to grab Morgan's arm and pull her aside to keep others from hearing their conversation.

"Andie, that means he cares!"

"No, it means absolutely nothing. He was mad at me, he couldn't stand to look at me, so he sent me to my room. That's it."

"Andie..."

"No. He doesn't care." Andie shrugged like she didn't care even as she felt her eyes prick with unshed tears. "It's doesn't matter."

Morgan didn't try to sway Andie's opinion again. She frowned sadly for her friend and linked her arm into Andie's so that they could walk silently down the hall and to their lockers. Andie appreciated Morgan's willingness to let it go. Some days, she felt like Morgan wanted Eric and Andie to bond more than Andie did.

Morgan just wanted her friend to have somebody-anybody-that resembled family.

"What about you?" Andie asked once they stopped at their lockers to collect their things before class started. "Did you get in trouble?"

"Dad wasn't home, thank Christ," Morgan heaved a sigh of relief. "But John was, and he was madder than a hornet's nest."

"You could quite possibly have the most overbearing brother," Andie replied with a shake of her head.

"Can you blame him though?" Morgan continued. "Dad's never home and John thinks I'm becoming a troublemaker. He's gotten real strict with me." Morgan stopped and turned towards Andie. "That's why I think Eric really does care about you, Andie. He sent you to your room. He got strict with you. John does that to me, and it's because he cares. You know how sweet he can be... There's no doubt that he cares."

"But that's the difference between your brother and mine. John expressed his care in several ways, so you never have to wonder. Eric doesn't do that. Besides," Andie sighed, turning back towards her locker. "He's really got no reason to. We're not related or anything. I'm the annoying step-sister that made him come home and quit his fun college life."

"You didn't exactly ask for this," Morgan grumbled as she stacked her arms with books. "I'm sorry for how crass this is going to sound, but you didn't want your parents to die in that car crash and it's unfair of Eric to punish you for it."

Andie didn't respond. It was too soon to be discussing her parent's car crash. The topic couldn't come up without Andie losing her composure and crumbling to a sad pile of tragic sobs.

After closing her locker door, Morgan sighed. "I'm sorry, Andie... I shouldn't have said that. Listen," she hugged her books to her chest and faced Andie who was just closing her own locker. "Come over after school. We'll do our school work together. Then you won't have to be all alone in that big house of yours. Plus John will likely get onto you for keeping me out so late last night, so you'll get some of that brotherly love you've been missing out on."

Andie gaped. "I kept you out late last night?"

"I had to come up with something, Andie! He would have tanned my hide!"

"You're being dramatic. He wouldn't do that."

"He's been threatening to lately. I swear, he gets more parental by the day."

First period went by in a blur as Andie's thoughts rolled with jealous images of Morgan and her caring older brother who loved her enough to get mad at her for staying out late. She hated how much she wanted that. She wanted it so much that she continuously forgot that she and Eric weren't related. They were practically strangers, and the relationship Andie wanted with him just wasn't realistic.

Come second period, her thoughts were occupied with the visual provided by Morgan's fearful concern that her brother might end up tanning her hide one of these days. Before she could stop it, her mind had conjured up pictures of Morgan's twenty-year-old handsome brother taking his wayward sister over his knee.

Then she imagined Eric doing the same to her, and the heat she felt in she cheeks concluded how bad of an idea that would be. Something fluttered deep within her belly at the idea, and she felt a longing for something that she didn't quite understand. The confusing feeling was quickly replaced with grief as she realized something like that would never happen.

Strangely, she felt like she was missing something she had never experienced. What kind of loon did she have to be to crave discipline?

A loon who's craving a parent, her thoughts echoed back to her, and she had the sudden desire to cry.

Andie didn't tell Eric that she was going to Morgan's house after school. She told herself that he wouldn't care, but she had a nagging feeling about it the whole way over.

Morgan lived several blocks from school, in the opposite direction from Andie's house. It took them about fifteen minutes to walk home, because they had to cross the train tracks, and there was often a train passing shortly after school ended, and if they didn't cross it in time, they would be waiting up to five minutes for the train to pass.

Today, the train got there before they did, and as they were waiting to cross, it roared past them with a dizzying speed that rattled the ground beneath their feet.

Andie wondered where it was going and how hard it would be to jump on.

If only it was going a little slower.

Just as Morgan predicted, John was ready to give Andie the riot act when she entered their home. He lit into her before she could even take a seat and it was the very thing she needed. He wasn't angry with her for keeping his sister out late. He was angry with her for being reckless.

"You're too young to be out that late, Andie," he told her. "You're a little thing and someone could snatch you up if they wanted to. Honestly, what were you thinking?"

The rush of love she felt from this person who wasn't even in charge of her came as such a painfully sweet relief. She felt as though she had been left out in the cold for weeks and someone just gave her a warm blanket and a steaming cup of soup. She felt comforted and it stung at her heart because she was so saddened by the degree of neglect she felt beneath that comfort.

So, she started to cry.

She felt absolutely ridiculous but she had been on the verge of tears for days and they just wouldn't stay in anymore.

"I'm sorry," she cried as she buried her face in her hands.

Stunned by the sudden shift in Andie's attitude, John was under the impression he had scolded her to tears, and that she was apologizing for staying out late the night before.

What he didn't realize, however, was Andie's apology came from her own embarassment of blubbering like a fool over receiving the very thing she had been craving.

"Oh, honey, shoot..." John knelt in front of her as she sank into a chair at the dining room table. He put a hand on her shoulder and another on her knee. "I didn't mean to make you cry, Andie... I'm sorry I was so hard on you. I just want you to be safe, is all."

John and Morgan came from a working family that didn't make much. Their house was small and a bit run-down, and John managed the upkeep and even paid the bills as his father would stay away for sometimes months at a time for really no reason at all. John was only a year older Eric, and Andie knew they knew each other from school, but they went seperate directions after graduation. Eric left the small country town for the big city and a college education. John stayed right where he was to work landscaping and construction because someone had to take care of Morgan while their father away.

Their lives were very different, their homes and status included. But Andie couldn't help but feel that small, dusty, old house felt like more of a home than her own.

"Jeeze, John! Ease up a little, she isn't yours to lecture!" Morgan whined from Andie's side, and Andie almost missed the frown John flashed his little sister.

"No, it's fine, I'm sorry," Andie sighed shakily as she forced her emotions to settle down. "Th-that was nice..."

"Nice?" John and Morgan asked in unison, and feeling overwhelmed and tired, Andie nodded half-heartedly with a short shrug and said:

"Yeah, to feel cared for...I guess."