"Oh my god" I whispered.

I reached out, touching the familiar material.

A red balloon.

I pulled it towards me, with shaky hands. He had been here. I knew he had. I looked around my room, even though I knew he wouldn't be here. I looked back down at the balloon. I felt tears sting my eyes but I didn't want to let them begin.

I took a bobby pin out of my hair, popping the balloon with no hesitation. I let the red latex fall onto my bed sheets, broken. Broken just like my heart.

I sighed as I fell onto my back, just wanting to sleep and let all of this go for the night. At least just for the night. I felt the walls and silence begin closing on me. That damn silence.

I stood up hastily, making my way to my phone. I put on whatever playlist I could fine, trying to drown myself in the music rather than the eerie silence that held my apartment hostage. That held me hostage.

I connected it to my speaker when I realized it wasn't loud enough. I needed to be surrounded with noise because when I was surrounded with silence, it was just a constant reminder. A reminder of the loving noises, even the angry ones that fulfilled the four walls. I held onto those noises tightly, as if my life depended on it. It was what I needed, to imagine them dancing around the walls, my bedsheets, the curtains. Even with the loud music, the room flickered with bits of silence, because deep down I knew, I knew that this was just a mask. And that silence, that painful silence lingered in the air, beneath the music, beneath the beating of my heart.

I walked back to my bed, knowing I wasn't going to get any sleep now. I sat on the edge, my small feet touching the wooden floor, cold. I was a size 5, so tiny, something I assume penny was fond of. He was so tall, so intimidating, yet my little body was able to find a crevice in his heart, and I napped there, I dreamed there, or at least I hoped I did.

I shuddered when I realized I hadn't turned the heater on prior to going to bed. I sat up quickly, making my way through the apartment as the music played. I would probably hear complaints from my neighbors, but at least their voices were noises too, they weren't silence, and that was better than that.

I pushed the heaters buttons, wanting the rooms to warm up instantly. I looked towards my kitchen.

I guess I can go for a snack I thought to myself as I made my way towards the pantry. I pulled out some cookies, not really hungry but trying to keep myself busy. I opened the trash can lid, trying to throw away the wrapper. I held my breath when I noticed the popcorn box still laying neatly in between the plastic walls. I closed the trash immediately, not wanting to be reminded. I walked away from the kitchen, leaving my snack behind. If I ate anything I knew I'd throw up.

I walked back into my room, sliding into the soft duvet, wanting to get warm. I didn't even bother changing into pjs, I was already uncomfortable deep down inside, comfortable clothing would make no difference. I let my head rest against the headboard, the music continuing to play. Coincidentally I had chosen a sad playlist, but I took in all the lyrics, fighting back tears. Suddenly the song began to play, the song that bounced inside the walls of my head, that night in the bathtub.

I stood up quickly, not wanting to hear it because I knew it would lead to more tears, and even those were almost as bad as the silence. I walked towards my phone, staring down at the screen, lips trembling.

Somebody else- The 1975

My fingers hovered over the skip button, but I couldn't make myself press down. Without thinking, my fingers having a mind of their own, they pressed the replay button. I walked backwards, letting the sad symphony fill my ears. I bumped into my bed, causing me to sit down on it with a thud. I gripped the bed sheets as I looked towards my phone, letting the sad song fill the air.

Cry I told myself.

I had to let myself cry, it was healthy, or at least I told myself it was.

I was surprised when I felt my eyes stay dry, no tears to be found. I was in shock, the song just hit too close to home and my mind buzzed with emotions. My grip on the sheets tightened as the song escalated, I was no longer cold. My lips were parted slightly, I couldn't breathe properly thorough my nose, the air intake was too much.

I turned around, looking at the torn red balloon from earlier. I took the pieces into my hand, staring down at them as they laid peacefully on my palm. It felt soft against my skin, just like his touch once did. The lyrics continued to float around me, making the moment thicker.

A sudden bang on my door jolted me out of my thoughts. I assumed it was the neighbors coming to complain about the music. I debated on wether or wether to not open the door. I decided to open it anyways.

I sluggishly made my way to my front door, looking through the peephole. I sighed in annoyance when I didn't see anyone. I rolled my eyes as I began to turn around when a chilling scream stopped me dead in my tracks. I stood frozen, trying to listen for another scream. When I heard another faint scream, almost like it was fading into the distance, I ran towards the door.

I looked again through the peephole, trying to see anything but I couldn't. I could hear a bunch of commotion going on downstairs. It was loud and clustered.

Then I heard it.

Gunshots.

They were so loud, I could hear them over my booming speakers.

I stammers backwards, my heart slamming against my chest. The screams of multiple people echoed throughout the small apartment complex. I held my breathe as I continued to hear gunshots fill the air. I looked around my apartment, panicking on what to do. I ran towards my room, putting my sneakers on, grabbing my phone and anything I could find as a weapon. I decided on a kitchen knife, the biggest one I owned.

I dialed 911 with shaky hands. I stammered against the phone to the operator who tried to calm me down, by letting me know authorities were on their way.

"What's happening" I said with a shaky voice.

"Someone has opened fire in your apartment building" she said sounding quite shaken up herself.

"Why" I said as I fought back tears of fear as the gunshots grew closer and the screams became less. I thought the worse. I ran towards my bedroom, shutting the music off immediately in order to not attract any unwanted attention.

"Ma'm I know you want answers, but all I can tell you is to keep low and lock all yours doors and windows" the operator said. I slowly made my way towards my door, doing the opposite of what she told me. The whole apartment building was completely silent, that you could hear a pin drop. I looked through the peephole, my breaths low and shaky.

For a while I didn't hear anything, the gunshots grew silent. I sighed in relief, thinking the authorities were already here, but I was wrong.

"Ma'm please stay calm" the operator said on the other line.

"The attacker has made their way deeper into the apartment complex, please stay low" she said, my heart began to race again. I didn't answer her, but she could hear my breathing, signaling I was still with her.

"H-ho-how do you know?" I asked as I bit my lip in fear.

"Multiple people in your building who survived the attack have informed us that the attacker has made their way onto the elevator" she said

"We just don't know what floor they're landing on" she continued.

The whole place was thick with silence, feeling it overwhelm me again.

In the middle of the silence, I heard what I had feared the most.

The sound of the elevator making its way onto the floor. I looked through the peephole once again, hoping not to see anything like before, but I wasn't known for having good luck.

My breath hitched in my throat when I saw the singular silhouette step out of the elevator. A man. The person was dressed in all black, carrying what seemed to be a large gun. I saw him stand in front of the first apartment door and with one quick kick, he busted the door open. We weren't known for having the best security. Minutes later he came out, not shooting a single round. I covered my mouth my with my hand in relief. He hadn't found anybody, and for once I was happy my neighbors worked overnight. I saw him do this to every other apartment on my floor, unsuccessful every time.

Then the realization hit me.

He would be coming to mine soon.

And this time, he would find somebody.

I stumbled backwards dropping my phone onto the floor when I heard the same pounding on my door. I held my breath, frozen in fear. The other side of the door was silent, and for a second I thought he had given up.

"Ma'm? Ma'm are you okay? Please say you're still with me" I heard the operator say through the phone, but I couldn't pick it up due to fear.

My heart shattered when I heard the familiar sound of his boot kicking at my door. My door gave in the same way the others did and I was now facing a stranger who held my life in his hands. I looked into his eyes, I couldn't recognize him but I could sense anger and viciousness around him. I looked down in shock when I realized a bleeding body laying at the front of my door. The same person who must've pounded on my door earlier to warn me. And that meant the attacker had been here earlier, and he had heard my music, and he knew I was in here all along.

I felt all the sensations come back into my body, and I found myself running towards my bedroom the moment he raised his gun, pointing it towards me. I ran inside, looking around frantically as I heard his heavy footsteps behind me, slow, almost in a teasing manner.

I looked at my bathroom, and bolted towards it, slamming the door shut and locking it, my naive mind thinking that would save me, but deep down I knew it wouldn't.

I heard him enter the room, my mind racing. I remember dropping the knife in the living room, and swore if I lived, I'd never judge another dumb broad for dropping her weapon in a horror movie.

I walked backwards, keeping my eyes locked onto the locked door. I fell back into the tub, taking the shower curtains with me. I looked towards the door the whole time, facing my end.

The door began to pound, giving me a headache. I gripped the edge of the tub, waiting for it. The door broke open again, revealing the evil man. My lips trembled as he made his way towards me, slowly. I felt him grab at my hair and pull me out of the tub forcefully. I cried out in pain, struggling to get up. I heard him chuckle deeply at my vulnerability. I stood up with shaky limbs, my hair in my face. I heard the sound of his gun click, preparing it. I stumbled backwards once again, looking at him. I felt my back slam against something hard, but not as hard as the wall. The man looked up, confused and slightly scared. I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion. I felt large hands grip my tightly, they felt all too familiar but I couldn't click the connections.

I felt myself began to black out, everything being too much for me. I slid down against whoever was behind me as their grip loosened. I looked up hastily at the man. He was pointing his gun towards the figure behind me, no longer at me, preparing to shoot in fear. The fear in his eyes was so visible, I could see it clearly even in my dizzy state. My eyes were closing and opening, fighting to stay awake. My mind screamed at me to stay awake but I was too weak.

All I remember was hearing a loud growl and painful sounds of bones breaking, as if someone was being ripped apart. I saw the man in dark clothing hit the floor seconds later, red liquid seeping from him.

The last thing I saw after that was those eyes.

Those familiar glowing eyes...