《Et Nos Cedamus Amori》IV.
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"Amicitiae nostrae memoriam spero sempiternam fore." -Cicero
I hope that the memory of our friendship will be everlasting.
When Brett and Eddy met Jordon, they were drawn to the boy. He was smart, had a good taste for sarcasm and amazing at playing both the piano and the violin. Also, he's good at compositions.
It was Eddy's first year alongside of Brett, who was in his second year. They both met Jordon just this year when they were put in all put in a class together. They both immediately bonded with the boy due to the likes of anime, manga, movies and classical music in general.
Of course, even with Jordon and a few other friends alongside of them, Brett and Eddy were still that unshakable duo. Doing everything together and always having each other's backs, that was them. That had always been them.
- - - - -
"Brett, I have to tell you something..." Eddy started, not too serious but he wants to be taken seriously.
"You can tell me anything, you that, right?" Brett started, not wanting the younger boy to feel nervous.
"Yeah... I know. I'm just nervous because you might not like her." Eddy replied.
"Her?" Brett asked with caution.
Is the day that I'm afraid of thinking about going to happen?
"Yeah. You know Toni Wei, right?"
"Yes. The very kind flautist we met like last year..." Brett recalled.
"We've been talking and dating over the past year and I've asked her to be my girlfriend... So, that's the news... I have a girlfriend!" Eddy said excitedly.
"That's great! My god, why did you tell me just now? I could've been your wingman or something." Brett replied, trying to hide the pain away.
"She's actually so amazing. She's really, really nice and I just love her, man..." Eddy started, with a dreamy look in his face.
You know how they say men change completely when they're in love? Maybe I'm a clear witness to that. Not just myself but also the man that I love.
"It's obvious you love her. It's cute. Like seeing Alexander fall in love before." Brett said, covering up his truth.
It's better this way, right?
Right?
Right.
"Yeah. Thanks, man. I'm glad that you like her already."
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"Well, I have no reason to hate her, so why would I?"
Right?
Right. This is not working out the way it should. Fuck.
- - - - -
Eddy pecked Brett's lips lightly and pulled away immediately. Brett whined at the quick lost of contact and pulled Eddy back in for a longer and passionate kiss. They did not nor could not care at the moment, it was special to them. This was the first time they woke up in the same bed, under the same blankets, on top of a soft mattress and in each other's arms.
"That was one hell of a way to wake up, was it not?" Brett asked, lips still red from their previous kiss.
"Y-yes, it w-was..." Eddy said, still weak and euphoric about their kiss.
"Need not to be shy, Edward Chen... I love you with all of me." Brett professed.
"I love you, too..." Eddy said, holding on to Brett a bit tighter.
They stayed at the same position for what felt like an eternity. Well, not an eternity because Brett's arm was already cramping.
"Eddy, as much as I hate to pull away from you, my arm is now cramping up." Brett said with a chuckle, almost a nervous laugh.
Eddy laughed along and kissed Brett's cheek.
"Allow me to hold you, then. Turn around..." Eddy commanded.
"Lovely, you really do not have to." Brett coaxed.
"But I want to. You always hold me close and I think it would be fair if I did so as well." Eddy said, tapping on the older man's shoulder.
"If you insist, my darling." Brett said as he gave in to the younger man's request.
He could feel his back pressed against Eddy's chest. Brett sighed in content as Eddy pulled him in closer. Eddy tangled his fingers in Brett's hair and he could feel the older man relax.
This was a perfect position for them since Eddy was taller. Nothing much was said between them at that moment, they were contented as they are. It was quite the beauty even if the opportunity that they will have a morning like this again was little to none.
Brett woke up with tears in his eyes. He felt the same sensations as he did before. He held a pillow close to his chest as he cried more. He looked at the time on his clock and closed his eyes.
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Falling in love is quite a hard task, is it not? Still, Brett let's the silent tears fall down. The words of his own mother hurt him, making him feel everything much deeper than he should. Fuck this.
Brett can't sleep so what he does is knock on his little brother's bedroom door. Clutching a pillow and his blanket, his brother opens the door. No words were exchanged between them as Brett entered the room.
"You okay?" Alexander asked as they both settled down on the bed.
"No... I could sleep because of a dream." Brett said, holding a pillow next to him.
"You were crying again, weren't you?" Alexander asked again.
"Yeah, but it's no big deal. Don't worry about it..." Brett replied.
"Well, what was the dream about since it's bothering you so much?"
Brett was silent for a while but faced his younger brother.
"Have you ever just dreamt of some situation where it seemed familiar to you but it had never happened?"
"Now that you mention it, I did have a weird dream. I was on a local concert with a pianist? I can't quite clearly see who the pianist was but it was so clear that it was a woman. I've just been watching her recently..." Alexander said.
"Do you know what that means?"
"I haven't told anyone but you about it but I don't know."
"You're dreaming of your past life."
"Wait, are you for real? Like, you're not fucking with me, are you?"
"No. Mom told me about it. I always had dreams that felt like I was growing up with it. It's like they're telling me a story that I know but forgot." Brett said.
"Like past life shit?" Alexander asked.
"Yeah, but it isn't so clear. It's like details and such, not too accurate but it's there. It was so weird, honestly."
"So, what did you dream about?" Alexander asked, not beating around the bush.
Brett was quiet for a moment but still answered.
"Me and Eddy on the same bed, just cuddling. He was so loving and argh. It's just, agitating." Brett responded.
"Why are you so agitated then? It seems harmless..."
"It is, but..."
"Oh my god, you're in love with Eddy... You're in love with Eddy! I never thought-" Alexander almost screamed in glee but Brett shushed him.
"Shhh... I don't need the whole world knowing..." Brett said.
"Is that why you're agitated? The dreams giving you false hope?"
Brett nodded, trying not to cry.
"So, you aren't disgusted with me or something?"
"Why would I? It's not like you're a different person just because you love a man. You're still my older brother." Alexander replied.
"Oh, okay... Thank you for accepting me, Alex. Mama and papa might freak out if they heard us..." Brett warned.
"I know... But to be honest, I don't see a reason why you shouldn't hold on to the hope of your dreams. It's obviously telling you that sometime in the future, you and Eddy will be together." Alex whispered.
"Alex, he has a girlfriend now... I can't hold on to the hope. It will only hurt me. Besides, ma told me that not every soulmates will end up together... I think it's the best to just let the idea go, isn't it?" Brett said.
"It's easy for mama to say... She's married to her soulmate. She doesn't know what you feel..." Alex said, getting mad.
"Nah, it's okay, Alex. I mean, Eddy's probably straight too. He's my best friend... He probably wouldn't want to be with me."
"Still, Brett. You can't always allow him to break your heart without him even knowing."
"I mean, it's my own fault too... I can't always let him take the responsibility, especially he doesn't know what I feel about him."
Brett yawned so contagiously and so Alex yawned too.
"Let's just sleep it off. I don't want to to worry about this too much now. Just let it be for a while. Whatever happens, I'll just let it be. Goodnight, Alex..." Brett said, dismissing the topic.
"Goodnight, Brett... Thanks for making me feel like shit." Alex responded with a laugh.
"Just hug me so you'll feel less bad, like when we were younger." Brett responded.
Alexander obliged and they fell asleep after that.
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