Seems like you forgot, the synopsis is yet to happen 😉

But trust me you will love the ride.

I had repudiated to play cricket after Humza was gone and was simply standing at one corner. I was only anticipating and waiting for Humza to return so that I could admire and fancy his gorgeousness one more time. He is so captivating and beguiling, I was not to be inculpated since it wasn't my fault. Any sane person would have done the same. Today again I woke up late and couldn't offer Fajir. I wasn't praying on time and it bugged and vexed me a lot.

I get enormously frustrated and thwarted when I am unable to pray. Well the soul knows what it wants and desires. I tapped my foot on the ground impatiently and querulously while I gazed at the front door expecting him to come again.

But he didn't. When about 20 minutes had drifted and there was absolutely no sign of Humza, I decided to leave and go to my room to offer fajir.

"Nabiha come now. You need to rest. You are pushing yourself too much." I asked her to come along. She did throw a fit about it but nevertheless accompanied me inside. "Aapi I love it here." She admitted cheerfully and I smiled like never before. "I am happy to have you here too." I chuckled.

"Aapi Humza bhai loves you a lot. I am glad you gave him a chance." My cheeks were immediately flushed with an unknown feeling that swirled in the pit of my stomach. Was it that evident?

We strode towards the foyer and then to our room. We shared it for now. "I'll just offer namaz. Go and take a bath." I said as soon as we entered our room. She obliged as she went in to the washroom without complaining.

I offered my namaz soon. It was all peaceful until I started hearing the cacophonous sounds of things smashing on the floor and Humza's voice yelling as loud as ever. Within seconds I found myself scurrying towards the source of the voice like a lost puppy. I had a frown on my face, wondering if everything was alright.

It was coming from downstairs and It became louder as I approached near the staircase. "You knew it all along mother." His voice was serrated and sharper than ever but it was clouded with agony and distress too. My heart beat sped up in seconds. As I looked at the foyer there was absolutely nobody. Again there was a booming sound of glass crashing on the floor. What was happening? I panicked. The voices came from the only room downstairs. I carefully walked towards the door and stood outside debating and contemplating whether I should go in or not.

"Humza please listen to me. It can be solved. Trust me." Rafiya aunty's voice had a shrill as if she was crying.

"No, congratulations mother. You are the first woman in the world who ruined her own son. You took the only chance of my happiness away." My heart constricted inside my chest as the amount of sadness and anger in his voice was just unbearable. He sounded so vulnerable and breakable.

I was about to go in when the door suddenly burst open. I found Humza standing right in front of me. "I..I.." A huge lump had formed in my throat preventing me from saying anything. I looked at the room and it was a mess with almost all it's contents on the floor. When his eyes met mine, fear clouded in them. In an instance, his hands gripped my arms and held me closer. "What did you here?" He jolted my arms and I winced as his unyielding grip was hurting me.

"Nothing.. Humza I swear.. I just heard your voice.. So.. So I came.. Came down because I was worried." I stuttered. For a minute I thought relief flashed in his eyes but before I could understand, anger took its place. When Humza was angry he became too scary but this time he looked like a beast ready to kill anyone who came in his way. Without even answering me, he shoved me away and I stumbled miserably trying not to fall. It was then that I saw Rafiya aunty in the room, her eyes puffy as she stared at me, the same fear that I had seen in Humza's eyes visible on her face too.

I turned around to find Humza splintering upwards. Without wasting my time I ran after him to stop him. I knew he needed me and I was going to be there for him. "Humza wait." I shouted but he only increased his pace. I even skipped one step after the other while climbing the stairs. "Please stop.. Humza." I panted but he didn't even turn around. He took a left turn and entered his room. By the time I reached it, he shut his door and I jumped back before it could hit my face.

"Humza please open the door.. Let me in..Please." I didn't even realize when a tear escaped my eyes. I knocked on the door but he didn't open it. "Atleast let me in and tell me what's wrong." I almost begged but again no reply from him. I stayed there for almost twenty five minutes.

I decided to give him some time because maybe he needed space. I knew that his life was complicated and he had gone through a lot. I was happy that he was opening up to me and I didn't want to push him away.

Heaving a dejected sigh, I turned around and went towards my room. Nabiha was already sitting on the bed. "What's wrong? I heard a lot of voices." She catechized as soon as I entered.

I sat beside her. "It's complicated. I think Humza had a fight with his mother. Now he has locked himself in his room." He was suffering and I could do nothing. He did so much for me and I had never done a thing for him.

"Did you try talking to him?" She peobed. "Yes but he didn't listen." She sighed in audibly. "Have you even told him yet?" I began to fold her clothes to distract myself. "Told him what?" I was still a little distracted.

"That you love him Aapi." She rolled her eyes as if she stated the obvious. My cheeks turned a shade of crimson immediately. "No. He must have understood like you did." I said while moving her clothes in my closet.

"Then do it now. It'll make him happy and he will forget his anger." She did have a point. It would make him happy. I felt dizzy all of a sudden. The anticipation of his reaction was killing me. "I'll just prepare him food first." I replied before going downstairs to the kitchen.

On my way I went to Rafiya aunty's room but she was sleeping and I didn't want to disturb her so I went down. I entered the kitchen to find no one there.

I prepared everything in a hurry. I made veg lasagne and chicken soup for him, placed everything on the tray neatly and carried it to his room.

Despite everything he had done in the past, I chose to see his better side and cling onto it. He brought me back to life. He gave color to my grayness, and made me ride on a roller coaster. Loving him was so wrong, yet I felt as if everything clicked, every piece of the puzzle fell in it's place. It didn't matter that he was dark and mysterious sometimes. I felt a strong pull to touch him and color his darkness into colorful shades, ending with our loneliness.

I felt feverish, galvanized and thrilled as I neared his door. There were so many butterflies in my stomach right now, and I let myself drown in them. I stopped resisting, not thinking or caring anymore.

I knocked a couple of times when I heard his voice, "Come in." It was half clogged by the end. I sighed heavily before pushing the door. I was amazed because it wasn't locked any more.

The door finally opened and the sight made my heart churn into million knots. A sense of deja vu filled my mind as his room was completely destroyed and all the belongings were scattered on the floor. He often did it when he was extremely angry. For all I knew he loved this room. It was his father's gift to his mother. It only indicated that something terrible had happened today.

I looked at him. His back was facing me and there was a cigarette in his hands. I walked in carefully not wanting to hurt my own feet from the broken pieces of glass fallen on the floor, I then placed the tray on his bed and turned to look at him.

"What is it?" He turned around, his intense blazing gaze on me, creating some churning fire in the pit of my stomach. The large room began to feel small all of a sudden and I could no more breathe properly. I willed myself to take a few deep breaths as he ambled towards me and stopped right infront of me.

"What are you doing here?" His voice didn't held the magic it always did.

He stood there looking miserable. I stared at his emotionless face, and I finally understood what I was seeing. His face was a mask of a sudden terror, and his glassy eyes were open but they were devoid of life. There was nothing. The world turned into darkness all of a sudden.

I always knew that Humza was too unpredictable, and his actions could be rather inconsistent. He was bipolar. One moment he was cold, the other there was fury and rage. Impulsiveness of his actions were rather spellbinding.

"I asked you something." He again pointed out.

There was some ominous and baleful voice coming from the pits of my dark, odious mind, telling me that I shouldn't confess my love for him but there was also my heart which was adamant on confessing it right now itself, believing that their was no other chance.

Everything will be fine once I tell him. I Chanted in my mind. "Humza I.. Uhhh.. Wanted to confess something." I began. His eyes darkened as heat slowly rushed to my cheeks.

I looked at him to find him gazing at me intently. I took his hand in mine as he flinched visibly. I sucked in a sharp breath. "Humza.. I.. I really Love you and I didn't even know when it happened but it did." I finally confessed. His adams apple was attractively bobbing up and down, distracting me from my choice of words.

"I want to help you out of the darkness Humza. I am unconditionally and irrevocably in love with you." I looked in his eyes waiting for any reaction at all but he did nothing.

"Are you done? If yes then leave." He clenched his jaw as he yanked his hands away from my grip leaving me startled. I was taken aback.

"Humza please don't do this to yourself. I just.." I began again when he let out a bitter laugh. "Excuse me but if you think that I am going to say that 'oh Anaabiya I love you too' then you are mistaken woman. I don't love you. I fucking don't even like you girl. Just because I spoke to you politely these days, doesn't mean that you mean something to me." He spat. Each of his locution was pushing me further into the pit of an everlasting anguish and despondency. All I could feel was venom and an incurable bane that was killing me fast. I was dying, not being able to move, not being able to set myself free from the clutches of desolation, hopelessness and wretchedness.

"You are lying." I fought back because I know what I saw in these last few days. "Think what you want but trust me you were so easy to fool. I enjoyed it and now I am done with you, so thankyou very much and leave." He shouted as I found myself on the the verge of crying.

"Why are you doing this Humza? Stop pretending. I know what I saw." I neared him but stopped abruptly when he walked towards the ash tray which was kept on the furniture, the only thing that wasn't destroyed. "Like I said, you are so foolish. Now get out." He yelled. A tear roll down my cheeks as I wiped it immediately, not wanting him to see me like this.

"Are you afraid of falling in love? Tell me what happened today? What ruined us? Why are you so upset? Did I do something wrong?" I bombarded him with my questions. All of a sudden his body stilled like a statue and I was scared when he turned around.

My eyes glued to his in terror. His eyes were two pits of rage, and he was uncontrollably and vigorously shaking. I stepped backward, and he immediately followed. "What part of get out did you not understand?" He screamed at me, and I flinched, bending my head down.

You are not weak. Face him. My mind shouted.

I went backwards wanting to separate myself from him as much as possible. He looked dangerous, and after so many days I was scared of him again. I felt as if he would kill me. There was so much hatred in his eyes that it chilled me to the bone and made me feel like I was completely worthless.

I couldn't fathom as to what it was that flashed in his eyes before he went towards the bed and threw the tray that I had placed on it. All the contents of the bowl were now on the floor. I jumped back in fear. Pain and agony filled my heart as I saw the food that I had cooked for him now scattered on the floor. "I hate you and I have always hated you. Get that etched into your thick skull. The act is now over and I am bored of you." He spat before storming out of the door. I didn't have the energy to follow him. As soon as he was gone, I collapsed on the floor.

I closed my eyes again, and I finally let my defensive barriers down and began to sob, falling into the abyss of hopelessness nd burning pain.

He was lying and I knew it but that didn't help because his words still hurt. It had gashed my heart into halves. How could he say that?

Minutes later I heard his car engine roaring before the screeching sound of the tires filled my ears. He was gone.

I waited and waited but he didn't return.

That was until it was midnight and I was still where he had left me. I heard the sound of the metal gates opening as sound of a car engine soon roared in the premises.

I got up and strode out of the room. I need to know what his problem was. As I neared the spiral staircase, I saw him. He looked like he had been through hell. He was stumbling here and there as he climbed the staircase at his own pace with difficulty.

"Have you been drinking?" I interrogated but my question was left unanswered. It was as if he wasn't even listening.

By the time he reached the top where I was standing, he almost fell. He still didn't answer my question. I tried holding him but he yanked his hand away from my hold. "Don't you fucking touch me." He seethed. He reeked of alcohol and cigarettes. His shirt was creased and his hair was unkempt. He was drunk. No, he was totally wasted.

He walked to the first door in the corridor and banged his hand on the door. "Open up woman." He shouted. My heart constricted painfully at the sight. My body was in a state of frenzy. The door finally opened and Stacy, one of his mistresses peeked out to see who it was. She yawned as she looked like she had been sleeping. Her eyes lit up when she saw Humza. The last reminiscence of sleep now disappearing from her eyes. Humza propelled her inside, got in himself and shut the door right at my face again.

on 4.2.2018