I felt two warm arms wrapping themselves around my waist pulling me up. I opened my eyes in shock and took a deep breath. I couldn't breathe properly so I was trying to catch every little oxygen I could. I felt myself being pulled in a lap. Someone was stroking my hair. And damn, did it feel good.

"Ssh.. Breathe.." I heard his soft voice. It was so beautiful that it just calmed me down. I tried to concentrate on my breathing. Warm tears fell down my cold face.

"Everything is going to be alright. I am here. No one can harm you.." he said and I closed my eyes, putting my head on his chest. I was tired. I was tired of all of it. I was tired of the memories. Why didn't they just go? 'Hey.. Don't give up. If you give up, that means you actually loose. Allah is still here. Why do you always forget about him? Pray and it would be alright.', I heard that voice. I nodded a bit as a response and felt myself being lifted. I felt a soft fluffy thing around me and felt that I was lying on a bed. I didn't care at the moment. I didn't care about the state in which he saw me. I didn't care that he was taking off my wet clothes and helping me with warm clothes. His scent was all around me. I guess I had his sweater on. I wanted to open my eyes. To see him, but it didn't work. My eyes just didn't want to open. I didn't want to think. I turned my brain off and fell into a deep, deep sleep.

"Dad.. Come on, she is sick. I am not coming today. She needs me... Okay, bye" I heard a voice beside me. I wanted to open my eyes but it wouldn't open. I felt my throat hurt and I was sweaty, while I had it cold. I felt a hand on my hip and another one was pushing the hair out of my face. I forced my eyes to open. When I opened them, the brightness burnt my eyes so I closed them again. I sighed and opened them again with much force. I looked into beautiful, bright green eyes. They were staring at me back. I felt like I had to be closer so I went closer and put my forehead against his.

"You scared me.." he said. I closed my eyes, feeling embarassed.

"Look at me" He said and I opened my eyes, looking at him.

"You are not alone, okay? I am here. Always" he said and I nodded, too tired to think of a reply.

We stayed like that for what felt like hours. I felt a bit better, but still a bit sick.

"Do you feel better?" he said standing up after I nodded. I didn't want him to go so I frowned. He just laughed at me and went. I crossed my arms. I forced myself to stand up but it didn't work. My head still hurt and I felt a bit shaky. I let myself fall on the bed but mentally face-palmed myself after that, because everything hurt even more after the fall. I sighed and stayed like that for a few minutes. I heard the door open and looked up and saw Aneel with a cup of tea. I thought that he was gone.

"I thought you were gone.." I whispered, my throat still hurting.

"I told you I am here. I am not going anywhere when you are in a state like this. Here, some tea" he said and gave me the cup. It wasn't that warm so I drunk it all in three strikes, realizing how thirsty I was.

"I want to take you out today. if you feel better, of course. I realized that you must be bored here every day" Aneel said and I got confused. He didn't look different. I mean, I was trying to figure out if he had taken something.

"So?.. " he said, waiting for an answer.

"Okay" I said, smiling a bit.

"Sahra! Why do I always need to wait so long for you?!" I heard Aneel yell and rolled my eyes. I finished my braid and went to the living room. I was still sick, but I was okay enough to get outside. I knew that the cool air would do me good. I was getting tired in the house.

"I am still a girl, okay?" I said and he rolled his eyes. I giggled to his annoyed expression and we made our way out of the door. Enjoy today, I thought to myself. We made our way to his car and went in. During the carride we didn't talk but it wasn't uncomfortable. I looked over at him. He was just so.. beautiful. And he didn't even realize it which made him even more beautiful. I smiled and my hand went to his hair. It was like I was on automatic-pilot. I played with his curly hair. He didn't look but I saw him smile a bit.

After fifteen minutes Aneel parked the car and I looked around. I couldn't see much so I looked at him in confusion.

"Just wait " he said nervously. We stepped out the car and he hold his hand out for me. I looked at it for a moment and grabbed it, ignoring the tingles I felt. We walked and I stopped when I saw it. The sea... Wow.. I'd never been to a beach before and I got really excited and nervous. I swung our hands back and forth and looked at Aneel, seeing him bored.

"Did I tell you before that you are such a kid?" he asked and I laughed.

"Yeah, you did. But I can't help it, this is the first time I am on a beach" I said taking off my shoes, enjoying the warmth of the sand. It felt so good.. Like clouds. The weather was perfect and I enjoyed the sun hitting my face.

"Really?!" I heard a confused voice beside me and realized it was Aneel. I looked at him and saw his confused expression.

"They never allowed me to go out. The only place I ever went to was school, and I never went alone." I said quietly. He turned to me and grabbed both of my hands.

"From now on, you are not going to think about it anymore. What's past is past. This moment is what's important" he said quietly and a bit unsure. I placed my hands on his cheeks and smiled.

"Thank you" I whispered and let go. He groaned a bit and I ran, for him to catch me. He ran too and I was caught after a few seconds. He was just too fast. He wrapped his arms around my waist and we fell on the sand. I looked up at the blue sky.

"What's your favourite colour?" I asked him out of nowhere. He was silent for a bit.

"Blue" he said and I looked at him.

"Yours?" he asked me, smiling a bit. That made my inside melt. So beautiful..

"White, I guess" I said. White, because I've been in the darkness for so long. The only colour that has no darkness is white.

"Favourite season?" He asked me. So he really wanted to play this with me?

"Summer. Yours?" I asked him.

"Winter" he said. I turned to him and placed my head on his chest.

"Biggest fear?" I asked him quietly.

"My nightmares, yours?" he said.

"Losing" you.. I whispered in his chest, not for him to hear. I didn't want him to hear. I knew that he didn't feel the same way but I couldn't stop the feelings that were developing.

"You won't" he said while tightening his hold on me. My eyes widened but I closed them right after. I was going to enjoy this, not think about it. I opened my eyes and looked at the sea. It just called for me. I stood up and ran to it. I walked in it and I felt the water hit my legs. It was so.. I felt free. It felt good.. I giggled and just walked more the sea in. The water was now hitting my hips. I felt an arm around my waist and closed my eyes.

"Its beautiful, isn't it. It feels like, if you walk further you actually will be free. You will be in the blueness. You will be lost from everything. All the darkness will fade. Feelings will be blocked. No one is there to hurt you. You will be all alone in peace. You would feel.. free" I said, enjoying the salty scent coming from the sea.

"If you walk further, you will come to a point where you can't breathe. You will close your eyes because the salt will burn it. You will close your eyes and see darkness. You will kick and punch and try to go up to the surface, just for that one breath. And if you walk further, you will be kept in the darkness forever.." he said and I turned around. He said the opposite of me and I looked at him confused. He touched my cheek, looking guilty.

"Do you really want to die so much.." he said and I looked away. So that was what he was talking about..

"Come on, let's go out. After we dry we can eat somewhere" he said and I got excited. This was going to be the second time we were going to eat outside.

"Let me order for you this time" he said smirking and I nodded a bit confused. Why would he want to order for me. And why that smirk? He ordered and the waiter went to take our food.

"I talked with my dad and told him how amazing you are at drawing. He wants to see it. So this week someday I will take you with me" he said and my eyes widened. Why would he.. Oh Allah, it was going all so..weird. After a few minutes the waiter came with the food. I looked at it and it was pizza. My mouth already started to water.

"It will the best pizza you will ever eat" he said and started to eat. I grabbed a piece too and taste it. It was so delicious.. Okay, this was my favourite food now.

"This is the third or fourty time I eat pizza" I said and ignored his confused look.

"Do you like sports?" I asked him when I saw a man jogging from the window.

"I like kickbox and football" he said. Well, boxing was obvious.

"If you could get three wishes, what would it be?" he asked me. Three wishes, I never thought about that.

"First will be you accepting Islam again. The second will be that we go together to Hadj. And I will give the third wish to you.." I said, not looking at him.

"Why am I so important for you?" He asked with a confused voice when he realized that all of my wishes included him.

"Because even though you were mean all the time, you pulled me out of that hole. Maybe indirectly, but still.." I answered him with all honesty. He ignored me and we ate the rest in silence.

"Aneel, thank you for today. It was amazing" I said kissing his nose. We were sitting on the couch and he nodded, hugging me before placing his chin on my head.

"Always. Don't forget, I am always here.." he said and I nodded, enjoying his scent. We were interrupted by the doorbell and I sighed before getting up and opening it. Something inside me said 'don't' but I still did. When I opened it, I saw a beautiful girl. She was tall and looked like a model. I'd never seen a girl as beautiful as her. She had bright blue eyes and full lips. She smiled at me, looking at the little piece of paper in her hand.

"Hey, I was looking for Aneel. Are you his cousin or something?" She said and I heard something fall on the floor, shattering into pieces. I looked at Aneel and he was looking to somewhere else with big eyes before standing up and walking towards us. I turned to the girl and smiled.

"No, I am actually his wi-" I couldn't finish. The next word I heard made me freeze. No.. It couldn't be true. It could not be true. I heard Aneel's shaky voice and saw his wide eyes. From now on, it will be over.

"MARYAM?!"

~~~~~

Final Editing Done (04-11-2016)