We were in the car on our way to where Aneel wanted to take me. He woke me up in the morning and was surprisingly nice. I still didn't know where we were going but I couldn't ask. I knew that he would get mad and I didn't want to risk the fact that he would take us back home. I was curious so I couldn't let anything happen. I turned to Aneel and watched him for a second. He seemed upset and sad. I didn't know why so I grabbed his hand and took it in mine, just to give him some comfort. He looked over it and pushed my hand away. I hid that it affected me and just looked at the road, as if nothing had happened.

"Don't- don't touch me, especially not today" he said. I just nodded, looking out of the window. I rested my head on my hand, since I was very tired. Closing my eyes, I heard the voice again. 'Help him today. Be with him, he needs your support'. I just rolled my eyes behind my eyelids since I was getting frustrated.

After a while he parked the car at the side of the road. Looking around, I couldn't figure out where we were. He started walking and I followed behind him. I got a bit scared and crossed my arms in front of my chest. I walked a bit faster to be close to Aneel. I looked around, realizing that we were at a cemetery. I didn't really like coming to once so I just stuck close to Aneel. We walked over to a grave without a name. Aneel stopped and looked at it for a second. I was confused. Who could be in there?

"Hey Maryam. I'm sorry that I didn't come to see you for over a month now. I got married and everything was just too much. Don't worry though, I still love you" he said and sat down at the edge of the grave. I went over and sat down beside him. I took his hand in mine, and held it tighter when Aneel wanted to take his hand off. Not this time.

"Salaam Maryam. You see how Aneel is now. How he is since you are gone. He is hurt every day. Guilt is eating him. I'm sure that he used to be very nice. If you were here, I know that you would be mad at him. He is a mess Maryam. I know that he still believes in Allah, yet he thinks that He let him down. But don't you worry, I'm going to help him. I'm not going to help him by being his wife but as a friend. Don't you worry, yeah? I won't give up since I know how much of a good person he can be" I said with little tears. If I was already in such a pain, what would Aneel feel? I looked over at him and he had tears streaming down his face. I wiped the tears away and he closed his eyes. He opened them and looked deep, deep into my eyes. It looked like there was a load of weight on his shoulders and he didn't know what to do with it.

"I thought you would hate her" he said. I didn't say anything and we sat there for a long time, just in silence. Holding hands, not talking. After a while he stood up and tugged my hand to stand up too and we went home. None of us talked and we went to the balcony, still holding hands. It was like we were just walking without realizing. When we entered the balcony, we sat down on the floor.

"Why?" I asked him and he looked at me in confusion.

"What?" He said, looking at me in confusion.

"Why did you think that I would hate her?" I asked him. He shrugged his shoulders, looking in the distance.

"Well, aren't girls like that? Always jealous at others" he said and I smiled a bit. He said that so funny, like as if he knew everything about girls.

"No we do not" I said, chuckling slightly. He smiled but didn't say anything.

"But why would I be jealous at someone who... died and you love her" I said and he nodded. I placed my head on his shoulder with fear that he might flip but he didn't do anything.

"Tell me about her" I said. I wanted to know about them. How it is to be in love. I never fell in love and I never thought I would. I actually never even thought about love. He laughed a bit and it made my heart melt.

"How awkward is this. My wife asking about my love" he said and I smiled, letting him continue.

"We were in high school. I saw her the first day and actually really didn't like her. She was just.. too sweet. She was getting along and helping everyone. She was so beautiful, so strong. She was like a light. She was always happy and everyone loved her. I was not always like this, ..this bad. I had been doing the bad things because it just helped me not to think about all of this and it fades my guilt away for a bit. I wanted to marry her. We didn't have a relationship since we didn't want that. What's the point in dating if you want to marry each other? I talked with my parents and they talked with hers. Her parents didn't want us to be together. They didn't want her to be happy. She went through so much, just like you. She got beaten up too, but I never knew. I realized it after she died, getting to know about it from others.." he stopped for a second and took a deep breathe. I moved my thumb on his hand to comfort him and he let me, which I was grateful for.

"She, she always fought for us. She would be so sad and moody sometimes. It was weird because she was always happy. When I asked her about it, she said that it was school and the situation we were in. Little did I know that she was being beaten every day she came home from school.. Even though she was so weak, she always fought for us and I messed it up. I ruined everything and her. Because of me she is lying in the cold there, all alone" he said. I sat up and hugged him. I didn't know what to say. It was too much. I never knew that he went through all of this. It must've been tough. He didn't hug me back but I didn't care. I was too busy with breathing in his smell. I hugged him tighter for a second.

"Everything will be alright. Nothing was your fault. But.. why did we go there today?" I asked him when I pulled away. He looked away, cracking his neck.

"Cause today- today is the day that she is there in the cold for two years" he said. I felt so bad so I stood up. I grabbed his hand and he stood up too and we made our way to the living room. I needed to start somewhere so I was going to do the only thing I knew the best. The only thing that would maybe help him to trust Allah again, to ease his pain...

~~~~~~~~~

He's opening up a bit righttt

Final Editing Done (11-10-2016)