i got ready for my mahandi after xavier. married me i never thought i would have a proper wedding but.... life has very nice ways to make you speechless .

my hands are covered with mahandi , and zayn name is written in my mahandi .

i was lost looking at my mahandi and everyone else was getting ready .i moved towrds the window and stood there.

i was starring at the people down they all were , looking at the last decorations, children were playing , boys were looking if the cars are ready to take us to hall .Elders were talking .

Everyone was here and happy for the wedding ,i got a big family .A smile appeared on my face thinking about it .

but one person that i want most or every girl want to have. on her big day is not here ......

my father is not here, a tear slipped from my eye just thinking about him .

a hand on my shoulder brought me out of my thoughts .

"mom " she was standing behind me all ready in her dress . i put a smile on my face not want her to get sad.

"you look beautiful mommy " i said to her .

"i should be the one telling you that " she said .

"oh its ok i always look beautiful " i teased her .

she smiled " so you are gonna be offically gone now "

" i was offically gone for months mom .. or you could say taken. " i teased her .

"beta i am still not fond of him " she said

" mom he is the nice person one could ever ask for don,t you trust me "

" but i wanted you to be near to me so i could see you , .... but now ... you will go so far , from me. "

" mom i will always be here just one call and i will be there i know its difficult but allah knows best, its also difficult for me . i love both of you and you have no idea how hard it is for me to leave one of you"

"you don,t have to leave mari jan he is your husband you have to go where he takes you and me i am being just sentimental right now ..

"but it is not fair to leave your mom " i said upset .

"this is the law of this universe mari jan we have to leave our family today or tomorrow " she said .

"but ..." she stopped me from talking .

"i just want you happy are you ?" she said to me.

"mom i..... when zayn married me that time i had a dream where their was a door and a light was coming out of it and you were their not letting me go to that door and then ... zayn came out of it ...... i saw it for few days but i was never able to go with him i would wake up everytime before i could hold anyone hand ... but ... last night i saw the same dream mom ... and .... i saw the door and i went inside it ... i ...i saw me and zayn we were sitting together mom and were laughing we all were there but..... mom ... i felt like something was missing i was really happy so were you guys but .. i was again looking here and there to find something ."

"what were you looking for ?" she asked me .

"i don,t k know mom i never find out but i woke up and was feeling empty ,... it was really distrubing dream "

its ok jan you were reallly tired and we kind of have those dreams when we are tired "

"but that was at fajar time mom " she looked at me shocked .

"ita ok just do pray 2 nafal inshallah everything will be fine "

"inshallah "

"ladies we have to go if your talks and painting your faces are done. " justin appread in the door .

everyone scolded him but it was funny the way he put his hand on his nose when he smelled all perfome and powder smell.

"yeww its so bad smell... god so much perfumes have you guys took bath in perfumes. .......bhabi lets go, i don,t want yo to die here "

he looked at me but the moment he looked at me his eyes got huge and his mouth open .

but his next words made me so red .

" wowww xavier is so wiped tonight "

everyone laughed on his comment.

"justin i told you to bring them all down we need to leavveeee." a voice came feom behind justin it was aman husband fahad

"as he entered inside and looked at his wife he got freezed.

"oh my god is it my wife or some other angel " she blushed on her husband comment and and we all giggled .

" no fahad bhi it just your wife ".he dramatically put his hand on his heart .

"please some one call ambulance i am gonna have heart attack "

they all laughed on his acting .

"enough of your acting mr hubbt we need to leave lets go " aman said

*****************

we all left for the hall .i was with girls sitting on stage xavier was outside with male guests , males and female had separate hall .

girls were dancing and laughing . grand ma came to me and congratulated .

"i am really happy we brought you home properly my zayn is lucky to have you ."

she kissed my forhead.

aman and other girls stood in line by the entrance. , it only means the boys are coming inside .

yes girls were on my side while boys were on xavier side.

.

justin and sheraz appered in the gate and then grandpa entered with xavier beside him he was wearning tradiotonal kameez shalwar with green waist coat same as mine dress .

the boys held a roof of wood above his head which was covered with all roses .

our eyes met and it looked like the world stopped right there.

neither he moved nor i removed my eyes .justin gestured him and said something in his ear which made him out of trace and he started walking towrds me .

the girls were throwing roses petals on them .

i lowered my eyes as they neared me , i was so nervous .

he came to the stage and sat beside me. i still haven,t looked at him .

after a.while boys and girls went down the stage and stated dancing.

"i don,t think i am looking that ugly that you don,t wanna look at me ."he said near my ear.

"its not that everyone is looking how would .....i look at you " i said to him slow still not looking at him.

"soo i am your husband not someone else " he said to me .

he grabbed my hand and intertwined our fingers .his this action made me look at him.

"you are really looking beautiful my jan " he said to me looking at my face .

"thanks , you are also looking handsome" he smiled to me .

after a while everyone came and started the rituals , some were teasing us , some were taking photos .

"wait , wait lets have a game " aman voice came .

"what game " sheraz said .

" bhai. how much you love bhabi ?" she asked the question from xavier .

"what sought of question is that . we all know how much he love bhabi " justin said defending him .

"justin be quite and let him answer me"

"ok don,t be angry " justin said putting his hand in defence.

"she is the beat of my heart

and the colour of my life ,

when she smile my all worries. vanishes away

she is bright light of my dark life

she is the angel who save me from darkness of world.

she is the calmness of my storms

she is love of my life

she is my jan

she is my half iman."

xavier said it looking at me and made everyone quite with his words , no one said anything but just listen to him .

i was so lost in his words .a tear fell from my eye but he quickly clean my tear .

"so i love her more than my self "

suddenly boys started whisteling and clapping , it made me come back to my senes and i quickly looked away from him but he didn,t moved away ,he held my hand and was still looking at me.

"so you got your answer wify now what would you say " aman husband said to her.

"ok ..ok well the words were really amazing but brother if you mean everyword you said why don,t you prove it ."

"how " justin said

aman gave him annoyed look .but she turned towrds us .

"well bhi your name is written in her hand means in her mahandi if you find it means you really do love her if not than...... ." she raise her eye brows .

"well sis i have proved my love many times that you don,t have to know about beacuse its our personal stuff "

i quickly looked down and blushed oh my god how can he say such things so bluntly.

"but i will find my name don,t worry "

he looked at me and grabbed my hands.he stretch out my hand infront of us .

"if i find it i would need my gift "he whisper to me.

"what gift ?" i looked at him confused .

"well i will tell you about it on right time my wife "

i looked away beacuse i know he would not let me go that easily .

he looked at my hand and in few seconds he found it .

He looked towrds me and smirked and i knew he found it .

but he looked at it and kissed it which made me blushed and everyone else to whistle.

after so many more rituals and dancing ,in which me and xavier didn,t participated because i didn,t knew how to dance and i was bride and their were so many people so it do not look good , thank god xavier understood and.helped me out in the situation by also saying he don,t want to dance not today atleast as he was also tired .

our both backs were hurting like hell mine too much because of heavey dress.

xavier atlast told somone it was late and.we both were tired by sitting on the stage for hours ,and we need to get back home .thankgod they listened and now we arrived at.home

i went to my room because i really need to get easy and remove this heavey dress.

"god it looks so easy when we are just watching the brides sitting but it is so hard uff my back is killing me ."

i changed my dress and showered with warm water which relaxed my body . i offered my prayer and went to bed.

"oh my god this bed is comfortable "

"not much comfortable then mine " i so quickly looked at my side that almost broke my neck.

"Xavier ..... what the hell are you doing here " yes that dude was lying beside me.

i quickly sat up in the bed

"nothing wanna spend sometime wih my wife ."

"xavier you need to leave ,you can,t be here what if someone saw you here . come on leave ." i tried to get up from the bed but he held my hand and pushed me back ,...... which resulted me being fall on him.

"ouch... my nose .. you idiot you hurted my nose ."

"sorry i didn,t mean too "

"then don,t pull someone like that " i said to him .

" sorry " i looked up at him and now i know that i was lying on him and we were in a vary intimate moment ....

"you are looking really beautiful , is this the glow of our marriage " he said smirking.

"shut up .. and leave me " i try to get free but he was not letting me go .

"xavier leave .. someon will come "

"no one is coming everyone is asleep and even if they come so what we are husband and wife.

well he was right i got quite and he was so intensely looking at me . he held the strand of hair and put it behind my ear.

we were so near that we could hear each other hesrt beat .as he moved closer to me to kiss me.....

suddenly someone knock on my room door .

"larib are you awake " my mom voice came.

"shit " we both said at same time

"mom ? "

"shit how can i forgot i told her to sleep with me tonight "

"what ... how could you forget .

"another knock came

"coming mom

"mom is on the door "

"i know !" he said.

"well go then get up ,"thank god he left i quickly moved away from him.

he got up from the bed and was looking at me .

"what "

"nothing ,you were lucky today and got away ....but no one will safe you tomorrow baby because i have waited too long " and he kissed my cheek and left through the window .

"oh my god.... he was right i was saved today but tomorrow..god... . but he was right he gave me alot of time."

i

i was still thinking when my mom voice brought me out of my thoughts

"coming"

**************

next day

larib are you ready they are asking for you for the nikkah cermony.

yes i was ready in my bridal dress

i nodded my head to maria .

on my permission maria called the guys inside ,my brother came inside they took me TO the hall.

everyone was waiting in the hall when i moved inside allah names started .

i moved to the stage and a red duppata was spread in the middle of sofa ...it mean xavier was coming .

i could sense him he sat on same sofa but due the duppata.between us we could not seen each other .

girls were on my side and boys were standing with him .

zaynnwas asked first and he said it in one go with out waiting .

then papers were given to me.for sign after i declared to.marry him i signed the papers and a new happiness spread in my heart.

the cloth fall.from between us we were made to sit togther but were not allowed to see each other .

girls brought a beautiful mirror and held it infront of us then they put the red duppata on our heads .

"zayn bhi you have to see your bride in the mirror first and same goes to you bhabi and please tell us what you see guys ."

he looked at me and also held my hand in his which was under my duppata .

i try to free my hand because mom and everyone was standing .but he didn,t let it go

"so what you see bhi ."aman asked .

he squeezed my finger which made me.look at him in the mirror .

"i see my soul." he said looking in my eyes .

"wow mashallah "everyone said. and clapped

"bhabi what you see " they asked me

i looked at him but i know i was so red he squeezed my hand again to give me support.

i was quite for a while.

bhabi tell us please

"m... mari zindagi " i said so slow

(my life )

"what bhabi what you said say it agin we could not hear it ." girls said

"i heared thats is well enough you don,t need to know " xavier said . amd smiled to me .

on gradma saying they left me.

my brothers took me to the car and i was sit inside ,i was crying so much .

xavier came and sit on driver seat .i held the quran so close to my heart .

i know i spend time with him but still it feel so new . i think because we have our elders blessing s that is why it feel so different.

as he started the car we moved to different direction then the one to our mansion

"where are we going " i asked him

"to our home " he said to me .