Author's note:

As promised...as a thank you gift for my readers on reaching 100K.

Do give a chance to Talab-e-Ishq (Book 2) if you havn't already.

One more thing...ap log comment nahi karte yaar...but I won't plead or set target...okay...lekin agar chapter acha lagta hai to atleast comment kar diya karo...it makes my day and motivates me to give my best.

Next bonus chapter will be out when this book will reach 150K reads...you all will decide which couple do you want to read next.👉👈

Enjoy reading...

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"Zara?" Hamza asked her sitting near her on their bed and sighed when she didn't even replied to his question.

"Zara?" His voice came out so desperate that she couldn't stop herself from looking at him. His black eyes boring into her brown one's, wanting to discover her deepest secret.

"Please don't do this to yourself." His shivering hand hesitantly grabbed hers making her flinch, so he instantly retreated his hand back while immense hurt flashed through his eyes.

With a dejected sigh he got up, leaving her alone yet again, knowing she needed space. And he would give her whatever she wants as far as he could.

Coming in guest room which became his only place who knows his deepest fears after his own room, he tiredly sat on the bed. He would have crashed one of his brothers room but they were married now. He didn't want to disturb them with his never ending problems.

Placing his head on the pillow he closed his eyes, only to see that night replaying yet again on his eyelids.

She was his wife. Yes! He was her husband. A forced one to be precise. She didn't wanted to marry him ever. But she did...because of pressure. Because of something so intriguing.

It had been a month since their marriage. A month since she was living in his room. A month since they were pretending to be happy infront of his family. He would come here late at night when he was sure that everyone retired to their room and wake up early so that no one would notice, ohh he doesn't "wake up" because he barely get any sleep.

He didn't realised when his life turned out to be this. He was failing in everything. And he couldn't do anything.

××××××××××

Two and a half month ago...

He went to her college to pick her. Hoor was absent due to Humeira and Haider's wedding preparations which was near and Zara was invited for accompanying girls for shopping.

Hamza being the most generous he was for the certain girl, excitedly accepted the offer for picking her up.

He was standing outside her college for nearly fifteen minutes but their was no sign of her's making hin anxious. College was nearly empty, only few students were seen here amd their.

After more fifteen minutes, he couldn't help and step inside with abnormally beating heart.

After searching for her in every class he was running here and there like mad. Library. His mind clicked.

As soon as he opened the door he looked her eand there and as soon as he saw her, his eyes went red with fury seeing the scene in front of him.

She was sitting in one of the corners with her knees pressed to her chest and her hands tightly wrapped around them. While a vile man was bent on her form, disgust written on his face and he had the guts to move her hairs away from her face.

Hamza ran towards them and pushed that man away from her with full force. The man went flying away not expecting the sudden push.

Zara looked up at him, her eyes widened at his appearance and next second relief washed over her.

"Kya kiya hai isne?" His voice was dangerously low. "Maine pucha kya kiya hai isne?" He shouted this time making her jump.

"He...he...was blackmailing me." She barely voiced out making him to burn in fury as he strode towards that man who was still on the ground with his head bleading and started punching him without a second thought cursing colourfull words at him.

"How dare you!" And he kept on and on until Zara shrieked pushing him away. "Mar jayega wo!"

He fell backwards beside the shelf and looked at his bloodied hands unbelievingly and than at Zara who was crying hysterically barely supporting her body with the study table. Her dupatta was not on place, her shirt slightly torn from the shoulder.

Standing up he grabbed her things with one hand and supported her with other walking out of the library.

×××××××××

They drove silently through the roads towards her house. He called Hoor and made an excuse on behalf of her. He glanced at her disheveled form, her hand would move every other second to wipe the tears that leaked her eyes.

"What was he blackmailing you with?" She froze at his sentence but said nothing. He didn't asked again and soon he parked his car in front of her house.

She was out followed by him. Hamza grabbed her hand and pulled her towards him making her flinch and stumble. She grabbed his shirt in order not to fall.

"Tell me what did he do. Mai usse zinda nahi chodunga."

"He...he photoshopped my pictures and..." she was cut off by none other than her own father.

"ZARAAAA." The position they were in didn't helped them either. Zara quickly pulled away from Hamza's grip and turned towards her father wanting to get comfort from him which she so desperately needed at the moment but her father had another plan.

As soon as she aproached him, he harshly slapped her. With such a force that if not for Hamza she would have fallen down.

"Abbu?" Zara looked at him brokenly. Why did he slapped her when she was not at fault?

"Ye karne jaati ho college?"

Zara's soul got stuck up in a moment. Did he got the pictures?

"Abbu kya keh rahe hai ap?" She couldn't meet his eyes while asked barely above her voice.

"Itni masum na bano. Ladke ke sath aise huliye me aane se acha tha kahi maar leti khud ko." He was throwing daggers at his own daughter.

"Uncle! Ap galat samaj rahe hai. Aisa kuch bhi nahi hai. Mai usse sirf drop karne..." Zara's father yet again cut him off.

"Mujhe mat sikhao kya galat hai kya nahi. Or tum!" He called out to his daughter. "Ye jiske sath ye harkat karke ayi ho usi ke sath farig ho jao. Mere ghar me ghusne ki zarurat nahi hai. Ek kadam bhi aage badhaya to jaan se maar dunga." Saying he closed the door on their faces. Zara was standing like a statue comprehending the situation. What was it? And what had it become? She fell down on her knees crying hysterically.

"Zaraaa?" Hamza didn't knew what to do for the first time in his life. She didn't even heard his call. He didn't even imagined this situation in his dreams.

So he did what was best for the situation. He called his family.

Within fifteen minutes of his call his father, taya abbu and Zaydan were present.

Hamza as quickly as possible narrated the whole incident to them. Zara was still sitting on the threshold of her house crying.

"Zara?" Junaid Jahangir asked patting her head lovingly making her look up. "Bache? Ham baat kare apke abbu se?"

"Uncle please! Please unhe kahe na meri galati nahi hai. Maine kuch bhi nahi kiya."

"Ap fikar na kare. Ham baat karege unse." Saying he knocked on the door.

×××××××××

The difference between hearing and listening is, while hearing we only hear what the other person is saying and while listening we understand what he/she is saying.

But her father didn't listened to her. To her pleas. He threw her like a trash, when she needed him the most.

The only thing he said was, "Iska nikah iss ladke se karwa kar le jaye ap isse yaha se."

And that was the moment her tears dried, for no one knows how long as she sat in the car beside him heading towards his home. But where was her home?

××××××××

Present...

The fate played its game that night. They were nikahfied that night itself as it was not appropriate for her to live their without any mehram. And rukhsati was kept with Haider's wedding which was in five or so weeks.

Hoor tried talking to her best friend, but it all went in vain.

She just closed herself in a coccoon, and it continued till today and Hamza himself didn't knew till when.

He got up when heard the call of azaan and stepped towards his room, knocking lightly he entered knowing he won't ever get permission.

She was in sujood. He himself got freshed and went to masjid knowing she won't ever let him lead her prayer.

That carefree Hamza and Zara were somewhere lost not knowing their way back.

×××××××××

Today Mirha and Fajar were going to come for stay. Hamza was getting anxious as to where will he sleep at night. Living room wasn't an option as they will stay till late at night. Guest room will be occupied.

He had a flight after two days to Mexico, where he had to present his own car design. It was important for his future.

As usual knocking on his own room's door he stepped inside. She was laying lifelessly on the bed. He cleared his throat gaining her attention.

"Fajar or Mirha are coming to stay. I will have to stay here." She looked up at him sitting up in criss cross position. "It is just for two nights...I have a flight in two days. I will take the couch if you are not comfortable." She just nodded her head fidgeting with her fingers.

"Tum chalogi mere sath?" Zara looked up with wide eyes. "Shit! I am sorry. I know you are not comfortable with me. Its ok. I will go alone." Saying he left the room before doing some more blunder than he already did.

××××××××××

"Hamza usse baat karke to dekh." Haider said to him and he didn't even paid any attention.

"Tu sun raha hai Hamza?" Ali literally moved him violently.

"YAAR NAHI SUNNA HAI MUJHE. DAFA HO JAO." Hamza shouted at them like this for the first time in their lives. They did shout at each other randomly but this was the first time he was letting out his anger on them. And he did felt guilty next second. "I am sorry." He said not meeting their eyes and rubbed his face with both of his hands leaning back on his chair.

"Dekh Hamza hame pata hai jaisa bhi hua thik nahi hua lekin jo hua wo thik hua." Ali smacked Haider's head at his stupid theory. "Usse or confuse mat kar".

"Hamza jo bhi hua jaisa bhi hua...you both need to talk it out. Us par kya guzar rahi hai ye ham soch bhi nahi sakte. Lekin tu hi soch usne apni best friend se tak share nahi kiya. Agar aisa hi chalta raha to it will have consequences. Jo tum dono ki life par bhari effect karege." Ali reasoned with him.

"I know yaar. I know. Maine bohot koshish ki usse baat karne ki lekin...I can't do it anymore...mai haar raha hu...mai or nahi kar sakta ye..." He was on the verge of crying. Haider and Ali themselves felt their eyes glistening at their brother's state.

"Agar tu hi haar maan jayega to uska kya hoga Hamza? Tere alawa koi nahi hai uske paas. Ham sab secondary ho jaate hai even Hoor Bhabi. Sabse pehle tu hai uske liye or koi nahi." Haider consoled him.

"Bas chodo in baato ko. Chal kuch order kar." They knew he didn't want to talk about it anymore. They were having lunch together as Hamza was going for a week.

"You can't do this everytime Hamza." Was the only sentence Haider said after brushing off the topic.

××××××××××

"Sunein?" If he wasn't awake he wouldn't have heard her whisper.

"Ap bed par so jaye...mai yaha so jaungi." Zara fidgeted with her fingers. She knew that he had a flight next day and he should take a complete rest before it.

"No. Its ok. You won't be comfortable here." Hamza said not looking at her.

"And you are?" He was shocked at her question. It was the longest conversation they had after their marriage.

"It doesn't matter."

"Ek kaam kare ham bich me cushions rakh lege bed par." She suggested nervously knowing he won't let her be uncomfortable.

"Ok." He so badly needed to rest on his own bed.

Zara faced her back towards him with abnormally beating heart. Hoor's words from the evening echoing in her ears.

"He had always loved you Zara."

"He wanted to send the proposal for you but we told him to wait till your graduation."

"Agar tum usse baat nahi karogi to kya aisehi alag alag rooms me saari zindagi guzarni hai?"

Hardly blocking her voice she closed her eyes and waited for sleep to engulf her.

Haider couldn't even close his eyes with her sleeping beside him. It was a dream come true for him, he did dreamt of her sleeping beside him but not in the circumstances that they were in.

It wasn't even half hour when she started shouting in her sleep making Hamza jolt in his place.

Throwing away the cushion wall he hugged her tightly trying to wake her up not knowing what else to do.

She seem to calm down after five minutes and fell sleep in his arms itself without even waking up.

Was she going through all this every night? Was he wrong in giving her space? With all the thoughts he didn't realised when his own eye dropped and he fell in deep slumber, after almost two months they were finally having peacefull sleep in each others embrace.

××××××××××

They both woke up at the same time and their breath hitched at the proximity they were sharing for the first time. Zara was crushed under his half body while her hands were tightly clutching his shirt.

After a minute of staring contest, Zara cleared her throat looking away...his constant gaze caused a red hue to spread on her face delicately making her even more beautiful.

Hamza awkwardly pulled away from her body, coldness engulfing their souls immediately. Without uttering a word he stepped inside the bathroom and Zara released her breath which she herself didn't knew she was holding.

××××××××××

"Nightmares kab se aarahe hai apko?" He didn't looked at her while asking. He was standing in front of the mirror wearing his watch while her eyes trailed at his every move. But she looked away when he questioned her.

"I am sorry agar maine apko disturb kiya raat me." She started fidgeting her fingers...the habit of hers when she was nervous.

"This is not the answer to my question." His voice raised slightly making her flinch.

"It stopped from last one year...but started after the incident."

"What do you mean it stopped last year? Pehle bhi aate the?" Hamza was confused at the sudden information and sat in front of her.

"Mamma ki death ke baad se..." she said just above a whisper. "After I met Hoor, they became rare...and the longest time I hadn't get was nearly a year."

"I am so sorry..." he hesitantly grabbed her hands in a comforting manner. She only nodded her head looking down and held his hand tightly, as if he will fade away if she won't held it.

"Apki flight kab ki hai?" She diverted the topic, not wanting to talk about that night but wanting to keep the conversation going for unknown reasons.

"Kal raat ki. Meri ek baat manegi ap?" Hamza cupped her hands in his and asked directly looking in her eyes.

"Psychiatrist se appintment lele. Please mana nahi karna. You are not opening up to Hoor bhabi and you don't let me be close to you. Please meri khatir. Ek baar visit karlo. And if you don't want to go, again I won't pressurize you. You need to let it out to someone. Please Zara?" She couldn't look in his eyes cause she knew she needed it, his eyes were full of hope, hope for her to get better. No one ever wished for her to get better.

She didn't revealed her problems with anyone, not even Hoor. Hoor's positive attitude was enough to bring her back to life. But she didn't wanted her negativity to effect anybody. But this was not anybody, this was her husband. And she will do anything he asked her for, cause he is the only person who she could call hers.

××××××××××

"I have booked your appointment for this Tuesday." He said while packing.

"No." Zara said abruptly. "I mean. I will go with you when you come back." Her fingers automatically found their way to fidget with each other.

"Zara. Mujhe ek hafta lag jayega. Ap Hoor bhabi ke sath..."

"Agar ap mujhe le jayege to thik hai warna maine nahi jana." She cut him off before he could even finish his sentence.

"Thik hai. I will extend it. But why are you avoiding Bhabi?" He asked while arranging his files in his suitcase. She started talking to him...and he was liking this small talks.

"Why will I avoid her? Its just that...she is married now. I don't want to burden her. Agar apko aisa lag raha hai mai ap par bojh hu to..."

"ZARA!" He shouted making her flinch and regretted immediately. Rubbing his both hands on his face he exhaled a breath. He had to be very patient with her. "Ap aise soch bhi kaise sakti hai?" His voice of full of hurt making her guilty. "Maine ya kisine bhi kabhi aisa feel karaya hai kya apko? Ap ka iss ghar par utna hi haq hai jitna ham sab ka." He kneeled down in front of her and slowly held her hand. He smiled mentally when she didn't backed off nor flinched at his touch.

"Please mujhe batae kya hua hai? Please let it out for once. You havn't cried after that night Zara. Please let it out." He pleaded.

"I can't. I tried but I can't. Cause now I don't have anything to lose. I don't have anything to cry over. And I don't even want anything to cry over. My mother left me. My father didn't ever wanted me. I have not left with anything." Hamza hate to admit that he felt hurt. Hurt that she didn't even considered him as one. Hurt that his feelings will forever be unrequited.

He wanted to console her. To tell her that he was dieing inside seeing her like this. But before that he wanted to grab himself together.

So he did what he thought was right for them for now. He got up and left her alone. Like he always did whenever she needed space.

××××××××××

He was gone. For a week this time. And she was already missing him. Even if they didn't talked before, she always waited when would he come to his own room for his things or to use bathroom. He was the only light in her dark life.

Whatever they talked in this two days, she was happy with the progress she was making. She even thought if he keep talking to her like this she won't ever need a doctor to heal.

But she was afraid...afraid of letting her heart take over her brain. Because her loved ones always leave her at her bad. Always...

When he left the room with hurt plastered on his face, she felt something trigger within her. She wanted to snatch the world and give it to him...so that she could see his usual smile which seem to fade away because of her.

What she didn't knew was...she was his world. And who would be happy when his world will be upset.

××××××××××

Hamza's presentation went well...he just have to wait for a day for the final results and than he can go to his home. To his Zara. He had missed her more than he could imagined. Every place he went, everything he saw, he told himself that someday he will bring his wife here.