Aslam o alaikum guys

Her words were ringing in my ears, it was so hard to believe her yet I didn't miss the sinscerety in her voice.

What is happening to me?

It shouldn't have happened, she should've loved someone else. I was not well deserving for the feelings she was having for me.

I was here assuming wrong things about her, judging her and there she was having me in her heart.

What kind of person I was, only thinking about my problems that I never had concerned about her feelings.

I sighed as I was standing by the glass window of my study room. Yes me the groom on his wedding was in his study when his wife had openly expressed her feelings infront him..

Such a coward I am..

I should've been happy but there was something holding me back from embracing Hania and her heart which was beating for me only, but here I was struggling through my own emotions...

Maybe I was not ready for that big blow from her, atleast it was a blow for me, I know if there was someone else in my place he would have been feeling so lucky to have a wife like Hania... I was also somewhat contented but not fully happy....

I was standing by the large glass window, looking at the silent city when my gaze flickered to my wrist watch, it was 4:00 am then I realized my feet were aching due to standing from past 3 hours like this....

I sighed and headed towards my room because I didn't want dad to find something suspicious about our relationship, he was now living with us....

I twisted the knob slowly and peeked through the door, Hania's sleeping figure came in view so without making any noise I entered in the room and closed the door behind me.

Hania was sleeping on the centre of bed so it was difficult for me to sleep on bed, I noticed she was no more wearing her wedding dress but she had a sky blue top and trousers, small smile invaded my lips when I read the words written on her top "YES I'M THE QUEEN", light pink veil was loosely tugged around her head from which one could easily abserve her chocolate brown hair....

She stirred in her sleep and I quickly laid down on the couch, I was feeling stupid to stare at her for that much long..

-------

Clicking of door disturbed me from my slumber, as I opened my eyes and looked around me, realized that I was sleeping on couch. I sat up and strechted my body to reduce some ache.

"Good morning hubby" I was startled somehow but Hania's greeting reached to my heart. I mean her voice carried that happiness which was lacking from my life.

"Good morning" I said as I looked at her and was left speechless for a moment when I saw her. She was wearing pistachio colored dress and her hair were left open as she was blow drying them.

She looked at me through mirror as I stood beside her and gestured her to give me the blow dryer. She was bit unsure but then she handed it to me, I smiled and started to blow dry her hair.

"Done" I said and turned off the dryer before putting it on the dressing table.

"Wow I didn't know that you know this girly thing" She said and turned towards me. I just rubbed the nape of my neck and sat on the bed to which she chuckled.

"I don't know what took me to this but your hair are beautiful, you were doing it roughly and quickly so I thought to do it with patience" I said as I looked at her, she stared at me with mischief.

"Now what?" I asked because she was continuously staring at me.

"Um nothing" She said and started getting ready. I laid down on bed and again remembered the back ache that I was having due to sleeping on couch.

"Sleeping on couch was horrible, now I'll sleep on bed and you on couch" I said and closed my eyes.

"I have another solution for this problem" She chirped, I frowned and opened my eyes again.

" Why not you sleep in another room?"

"Don't you think it's a stupid idea... Oh sorry I forgot whom it is coming from" She was trying to play with me so I turned the game and pissed her off.

"Did you call me stupid? " She narrowed her eyes at me.

" So you think you're stupid because I never called you that" I shrugged.

" Are you trying to mess up with me Faraz?"

"Well I don't care, I'm going downstairs towards Uncle Ismail" she said and turned towards the mirror to do her hijab.

"Don't worry there are no male servants in the house except the security which doesn't enter inside, So you can feel free to not tie this hijab" I said as I stood up from the bed and walked into closet to grab my clothes.

"Are you indirectly trying to say that you don't like me doing hijab... Am I right?" Warning and question both were prominent in her statement.

Oh shit

I turned around to only find her behind me maintaining some distance but her expressions were mixed of hurt, anger and frustration.

"Oh God Hania you got me wrong, I never said like that in fact I like the fact that my wife covers her head in front of Na mehram" I was gobsmacked on my own words... When did I like something in Hania... Oh God why don't I speak before thinking. I looked at her but she was gone. I don't know what would she think of me that all this time I was busy disliking her and now the next day of our marriage I'm liking something in her. I'm not prevert at all....

But you are acting like the one...

Cutting my thoughts off I went in washroom to take bath because now I was getting the headache that I never wanted to deal with...

As I descended the stairs sound of talking and giggling came from living room. Of course I knew the voices but when I heard Dad laughing with Hania, jealousy crept in me because he was my dad and I always ended up making him angry but Hania who only came last night into this house and she had already made her place in my Dad's heart... Of course she was Dad's brother's daughter.

So curiosity took the best of me and I stood by door to listen their talks....

"Beta I'll miss you so much when I would go back to Islamabad"

"But why Dad this is also your house and now that I've come here, I'll not let you go from here... Please give us some chance to prove ourselves the best son and daughter in law"

Dad chuckled.

"I've a business there and here I'll only disturb the privacy of newly wed couple"

" Dad you are making it more than weird but whatever the reason might be, I'll not let you go because I've been living all my life without my parents now that Allah has given me a father again I won't lose him" Her voice cracked at the end and tears came into my eyes, in that moment I realised that just because of me Dad wanted to go back, I was not giving him enough time and attention that he wanted from me after his confession and maybe my ego is much bigger than our relationship.... In that very moment I realised that I've only this chance and time to take care of him and his emotions which were shattered years ago...

I cleared my throat to which they both became silent and began doing their breakfast, I took my seat opposite Hania and beside Dad. I placed my hand on dad's wrinkled one to which he shivered a little.

" Yes Dad Hania is right we won't let you go... I've spent so many years in darkness, in ignorance now you're my responsibility and I'll make sure to fulfill it" His eyes became soft, he patted on my back.

"Problem solved you're not going anywhere" Hania giggled as her eyes also glistened. Dad smiled but I was somewhere lost in her smile.

What are you doing?

I asked myself inwardly... I mean yeah she was my wife but it had only been a day since we married.

"But there is some important work I've to do in Islamabad In Shaa Allah I'll be back in a week or two"

"Should I come with you dad? " I asked him.

"No no it's only a matter of a week and today is my flight... Don't worry I'll be back soon"

With that he wiped his mouth with napkin before standing up and headed towards his room...

"So what's your plan? " I took a sip from my tea and asked her, it was surprising that she was not angry anymore and started talking like nothing happened or else I thought she would not talk to me for that scene in room on hijab...

----------------

After attending marraige ceremony of Faraz me and Hoorain went to eat ice cream. My wrist watch was showing 2:00 am and only two ice cream parlors were opened.

"Why these guards are always with us can't we have some privacy" She huffed. I chuckled.

"They are not looking at us so think them as public who does not care what you do so yeah practically we've privacy, by the way what do you wanna in privacy?" I took a spoon of blue berry ice cream in my mouth and winked at her

"Fahad you are such a..." She didn't complete her sentence as she was thinking to give me a name.

"Yes my love" As we were sitting beside each other so I quickly took a bite from her cone ice cream. She chuckled.

"you are such a shameless" I laughed out loud.

" Fahad shall we go home" She suddenly became tensed.

"What happened? We've not finished our ice cream yet"

"Nothing it's just I'm so tired, besides this heavy dress is making me uncomfortable, we'll eat this in car" She suggested

"Okay Hoor as you wish" I smiled and paid the bill then we settled in the car.

As the car reached home, Hoorain's mobile rang but she quickly cut the call.

" What happened who is calling?" I was concerned.

"Uh ami was calling, she told me to call her as soon as I reach home, first I change then I'll message her" She said and descended from the car.

----------------

"Hurry up Hoor we've to get there early, Faraz told me to come at fix 10:00 am and it's already 9:30...." I was cut off by her.

"I'm ready I'm ready let's go" she shouted while coming downstairs. I chuckled and we headed towards the mall to bring some gifts for the new couple.

We bought the gifts for both of them ,then we were exiting from the mall but a woman with her newborn baby bumped into Hoorain.

" Oh no I'm so sorry I hope I didn't hurt you. Is your baby fine? " Hoorain became so worried that her voice cracked. Tears welled up in her eyes.

"No it was not your mistake, it's just I'm a new mom so sometimes it becomes very difficult to handle a newborn in public places, I'm sorry I should go" with that she was gone but Hoorain still stood there watching the woman's back.

"Shall we go" I kept my hand on her shoulder and gestured her to come with me.

As we sat in the car, I grabbed her hand.

"I'm sorry it was my mistake that I took you to mall"

"Fahad why are you sorry, this pain of losing my baby will always remain with me, no matter how much I try to be happy, no matter if I don't go anywhere, this loss will always break my heart in million pieces" She said as I lone tear escaped from her eyes.

" Don't worry Allah will bless us with another child" As soon as those words escaped my mouth, her face became rigid but she quickly recovered it.

"In Shaa Allah" She smiled. I kissed on her knuckles.

----------------------

Today we went to Faraz bhai's house and stayed there till evening after that Aunty Aasia took Hania to her house, it's our tradition that bride goes to her parents house on her second day of marriage to stay for one day. After that we also left.

"Fahad if you don't mind I want to meet my parents. I'm missing them badly" I requested when we were making our way towards the car.

"Good bye" I was startled by the voice of Uncle Ismail. He was standing behind us. I didn't know that he was also coming after us. Fahad hugged him and then we sat in our car.

"Yeah sure and it's a time to make everything settled between you and your father" he was speaking like he knew baba would forgive me easily, but again it was not Fahad's mistake.

I nodded and stared outside the window as car accelerated. Cold shivers ran down my spine as the thoughts of Baba's reaction upon seeing me ran in my mind.

Car stopped outside my parents house and suddenly I didn't want to go inside. Why time pass so quickly when we want it to hold itself back.

Fahad stepped out and came to my side, when I didn't move, he took my hand in his and nodded at me.

"Don't worry I'm with you, I'll handle everything for you" he spoke.

Stepping out from the car and covering the distance to the main door of the house, I felt like anytime my world would be ruined completely.

I exactly knew what is going to happen as my gaze was fixed on Fahad.

"If you are not feeling well then we will come another time, there is no need to pressurise yourself" He wiped my tears with his thumb which unknowingly fell from my eyes.

I didn't answer and rang the bell with pounding heart. After few moments door clicked open and to my utter relief it was my mother.

But to my utter disbelief, her face expressions changed in a seconds like someone has drenched her with ice cold water. Stress, fear, anxiety.... I thought I was going through these feelings but never knew that my mother would also copy my emotions.

"Are you not happy upon seeing me?" suddenly I felt my throat clogging.

"No no it's not like that, come inside" She took a side for us to enter. Fahad kept his hand on my back lightly, urging me to step inside.

Sweat coated my forehead when I entered in the lounge and ami led us to drawing room. With slow steps I followed her yet I wanted to run from there but it was late..... Because soon Baba was in front of me.

He was sitting on one of the sofa but his wrinkled hands were in his hair, he was stressed by something.

"Murtaza" Ami whispered, her voice was shaking. My eyebrows knotted because clearly it was not my presence which bothered them, it was something else.

Baba looked upwards, his glistening eyes became fearful as soon as his gaze flickered on me and then the person on my left. I frowned and stepped a little inside to take the view of that personality which was more of concern right now then me.

"Uncle Ismail what are you doing here? " Fahad asked the question with the tense and curious tone. I was flabbergasted at his presence.

What was he doing in my parent's house? How he know them?

"You are very unfortunate Fahad child, that fate wrote this worthless girl in your life.. You deserve someone better than her" I was shuddered visibly as uncle Ismail uttered those words coldly.

"Uncle I respect you but I won't let you speak like this about my wife" Fahad held my hand tightly in his.

"You both go from here" Baba shouted at me and Fahad.

"No why are you sending them Murtaza when I've the perfect opportunity to tell them about our past" Uncle Ismail smirked at baba. My eyes landed on ami then I stared at Baba, they both were equally afraid.

But why?

"Ismail please don't drag my daughter in to this mess" It was so difficult for me to see of how baba was begging Uncle Ismail. To be honest I didn't want to know anything which my parents wanted to keep hidden from me.

"I'm not interested in your past uncle, it is best for all of us if you go from here right now" Fahad firmly spoke, I was feeling blessed at that moment for having him by my side. Baba dropped himself on the chair whilst Uncle Ismail began to tell the haunting story of his past.

"Almost 12 years before me and Murtaza were friends, one day he came in Islamabad for his job interview and he thought to give a visit to my house, I don't know how he played his charms in front of my wife that she became fond of him in one day, I'm impressed Murtaza that how you made a place in her heart which I wasn't able to place from many years"

Uncle Ismail applauded, lone tear escaped his eye which sank my heart. Baba covered his tear stained face with his hands, his shoulders were shaking.

"It was their luck that he got job and both my wife and this worthless man thought to have an affair behind my back, his frequent visits already put me in suspicion but the day I accidentally caught them red handed is the day when my wife decided to leave me and my son and enjoy her upcoming life with Murtaza and that was same day when she died in car accident and he got the severe injuries" I stumbled but the door behind me didn't let me fall.

"I thought to send him to lock up back then but I was bound because I didn't want to drag my son and my dead wife's honour into that mess. But look Murtaza fate played very cruel game, your daughter did the same thing to Fahad and his sister, and the interesting part is she came in front of me so it was easy for me to reveal everything and make your life hell as you did mine years ago."

"Hoorain you should be thankful that I didn't bring Faraz here otherwise you would have lost a man who calls you his sister" he threw his sarcasm but I was in not senses to realize his taunts.

"Now Fahad look this is past of her father and Don't you dare forget what she did to you and your sister and you still think I should speak good about her" Uncle Ismail now pointed finger at me. Fahad became silent there, I expectantly looked at him but the hurt and regret in his eyes told me otherwise.

Well you deserve this Hoorain..

I mentally slapped myself for being the person I was, for being the daughter of that man sitting before me but I was hopeless, there was nothing that could change my past, present and future which I thought would be destructive. My father was crying hysterically so was my mother but I was silent until uncle Ismail left the house after putting it on fire and Fahad also followed him. He didn't even look at me.

"Fahad are you done with me? Do you hate me now? " Tears were mercilessly falling from my eyes when I ran behind him and caught his wrist.

He gulped the lump in his throat and removed my hand from his wrist. He went from there not clearing any of my doubts.

I was standing there on the main door of my parent's house when ami came and placed her hand on my shoulder to comfort me, But how could anybody console a person who is constantly being punched by fate. I really wanted to take my life at that instance but I didn't want to upset Allah because his world was already disappointed in me for my sins.

"Why you forgave him so easily when you knew that he was cheating on you? Why you didn't leave him when he was already planning on doing that to us? " I snapped, it was hard for me to hold back my anger.

"Because I didn't want to snatch your father from you besides he was regretting his mistake when he met that accident" She answered me which only triggered my anger more.

I walked towards drawing room and stood in front of the man who was my father.

"You were not forgiving me for my sins but how did you forgive yourself so easily" He didn't say anything but he put his both hands together.

"I'm sorry beti (daughter) " He mumbled, My heart melted at his words but my life was ruined. Completely ruined.

I sat on the floor facing him easily.