I slowly turned around after watching Geto and his cursed friend disappear.

Satoru was taking his blindfold off as he approached me, his eyes wild and frantic as he scanned across my face and body.

He nervously glanced over to the three bodies that were still bleeding out, piecing together as much as he could.

"Y/n..." he trailed off as he stared at me. His eyes holding onto so much disappointment. I wish he wouldn't look at me like that.

"Why are you here?" I asked him in a soft voice.

He began to take off his jacket as he spoke, "Itadori called me. He said Sukuna took over. Y/n, what happened? Why did he kiss you?"

I stood completely still as he used the cloth of his jacket to wipe the splattered blood from my face. I kept my eyes locked to the ground, unsure of where to even begin.

"I found Muta's body. Was he the leak?" I asked.

Satoru sighed, "Yes. I found out only days ago."

I nodded, "I sealed up his body. We should take it back with us."

Satoru was staring at me intensely now, "Y/n, you need to tell me what happened. You killed those three... I need to know why."

"They were weak. And curse users," I explained as I avoided his eyes. "They deserved to die."

"What the hell happened, Y/n," he snarled out in frustration.

I looked at the ground as the memories of Sukuna continued to race through my mind. There was no way I would ever share those with anyone else. They were just for me.

The last piece of my clan I'd ever get... a tragic family heirloom.

But still, I could tell him about Sukuna switching with Yuuji and Geto showing up. Or better yet, try to show him.

I finally looked up to meet his eyes, "Can I try a technique on you?"

"What technique?"

I shook my head, "It won't hurt or anything. I promise."

"I'm not worried about you hurting me."

"Good," I smiled at him, as I grabbed his face lightly with my hands to pull him down to me. "Because I would never."

He smirked, "Not that you could even if you tried."

I rolled my eyes, "Oi, shut it and let me focus."

It was one of the techniques I saw in Sukuna's flashbacks. My clan couldn't just take information from other people, we could share our own.

I had never tried before, and I didn't know if it would work, but maybe I could show Satoru my memories of today.

I took a deep breath and closed my eyes as I brought his forehead to my lips, focusing intensely on my interactions of the last hour or so.

I channeled my cursed energy into Satoru, hoping it would help in the transfer of memories. I didn't ever have to do that when I was taking thoughts, but this was different.

After a moment, I pulled apart and looked at him, "Did it work?"

His mouth dropped open slightly as his eyes glossed over, "W-what was that?"

"Well, assuming I did it correctly, that's everything I experienced since we got here."

He touched the spot on his forehead where my lips had just been, still seeming to be in a daze, "Those were your memories?"

"Mm."

"They seemed so real... It's like I was you. I felt everything you felt," he finally met my eyes. "H-how? Is it always that intense when you connect with someone?"

I nodded, "Y-yea, it's not just memories but all the emotions and thoughts that go along with it."

"As for how," I continued. "Sukuna kissed me to show me visions of my clan and our past. I saw this technique during it. I had never tried it before, but figured I should be able to do it."

"He kissed you to connect with you," he paused as he thought it over. "That's why you got so angry? I felt it Y/n. I felt everything you're feeling. Y-you feel so broken."

His eyes began to tear up as he continued to look at me. I didn't realize sharing my memories would be just as intense as when I took them from someone else.

I felt bad that he had to experience it... It's definitely not an easy technique to gain accustomed to. It was draining.

"Can you show me what Sukuna showed you? About the Sato clan?" he asked.

"I think I would be able," I muttered out. "But I'm not going to."

His eyes widened a bit, "Why not?"

I shook my head, "It's too much, Satoru. I need that to be just for me."

He let out a sigh as he ran his hands back through his hair, and we stood there in silence for a moment.

"I can't believe your technique is that fucking intense. I'd never be able to live with that," he mumbled. "Will that just always be apart of me now?"

I nodded, "Yea, it never leaves you. It just becomes part of your own reality. I'm really sorry. I didn't know you'd experience it so deeply. I thought you'd just get the images."

"No, it's fine. I'm honestly glad I understand. No wonder you barely use it and always wear that mask. I wouldn't want to be caught off guard with an unwanted connection either."

"Since Itadori called, does that mean they're ok?" I asked him.

"Oh, uh, yea. They're fine. They exorcised that special grade. The cursed energy was most likely coming from Geto and Mahito."

"Mahito is the patch boy?"

Satoru smirked just slighty, "Yep, that's him. Did Sukuna show you anything else? Or only things about your clan?"

"Only my clan. He was quite close with the leaders during his time. I'm sure he became quite familiar with my technique and how to navigate it."

"And them?" he glanced over at the three bodies. "A result of whatever he showed you I'm guessing?"

I only nodded in response. This was such an uncomfortable conversation. It was like I was an alcoholic letting my partner know I would no longer stay sober... Except I was addicted to blood shed.

Geto could be right... Gojo may not want to stay for all this.

He sighed out loudly, "So now Sukuna and Geto are both after you? That's just great."

"I don't think they're after me," I corrected. "I think they just want to fuck with my head so I can't help protect you or anyone else."

"Now what?" he asked. "Was this a one time thing? Or are you out for revenge now?"

I looked over at the bodies, "It's not a one time thing. I'll do what I need to do."

"Do what you need to do? What does that mean?"

I shifted my eyes back to Satoru, "It means I'll kill whoever gets in my way. I'm not interested in protecting the weak anymore."

I watched as Satoru clenched his jaw, the muscles and bones around his face becoming more defined, "But that's what we do Y/n. We protect the weak. We're sorcerers. We can't just go around killing."

"Why not? That's what we've done for thousands of years... Hell, that's what you've done your whole life until you met me."

"Exactly," he grabbed onto my hands, his voice laced with desperation. "You may be the only one who can change things. We have to break this cycle."

"You caught a glimpse of what I was feeling right?"

"Yes," he muttered out as he nodded.

"Then you should know I'm not changing my mind."

He closed his eyes as he exhaled the breath he was clinging onto as he waited for my response. Slowly, he brought me into a tight hug.

"You'll find your way back. I know you will."

"And if I don't? Then what?"

"I'm not going anywhere if that's what you're asking."

"Don't make promises you can't keep, Satoru."

"That's a promise I've made long before now. And I have every intention of keeping it. I love you Y/n."

I quickly pulled away from him, immediately headed back towards the front of the building, "Let's go get Muta's body and get out of here."

"Mm, I'll follow you."

••••

My heart ached as I watched Y/n walk past the bloody mess she left without even a hint of care or remorse on her face.

I had seen her just a few hours ago, and in such a short amount of time, she was a completely different person.

I should've never let her come on this mission. Yaga told me Geto would be here waiting, and I let him convince me she would be fine.

And even though this was Sukuna's doing, the timing seemed too perfect. For her to learn about her clan right before Geto was here to try and recruit her once again, there's no way that would be a coincidence.

Sukuna told her he did this to make her useful to him, and joining Geto would be an ideal outcome for the king of curses... I just couldn't figure out how they would've planned it.

I really need to quit letting her out of my sight. She has too many powerful enemies at this point.

I sighed to myself as I followed her through the building, keeping my distance to allow her some space to cool down.

I didn't want her to know this, but when she connected with me, I actually did see glimpses of what Sukuna showed her.

I'm guessing since that was her first time doing it, she wasn't able to perfectly control what I saw and what I didn't. But even after the small flickers of memories I caught hold of, I didn't even want to think about everything else she experienced.

I witnessed as a mother and child ran through a burning village, being hunted down like wild animals by ancestors of the Kamo clan. Their screams of terror still rang in my head as their loved ones literally burned around them.

At the end of it, they were both brutally murdered. The child first, and then the mother, so they could make sure she watched. And that was only one of the memories she inherited...

Of course she'd want revenge after that. Anyone in their right mind would.

But it terrified me. Because for the first time, I felt what it was like for her to kill someone. I knew it wasn't really who she was, but still...

I had never felt so much rage in my life. The rush of warmth and power that surged through her, it almost made me sick to my stomach to think about.

No wonder she made a pact not to kill. That shit would be terrifying for me too. How she had managed to control it at all was a testament to her strength.

But this is who Y/n was right now... she was a broken and hollowed out shell. A volcano ready to erupt. An animal desperate for survival.

A mother in her own right, focused on restoring a clan who deserved so much more.

And I wouldn't dream of leaving her now, not when she needed me most. The best I could do was stay close to her side and hope to keep her from doing anything more she'd regret.

I had to stop her before she was too far gone. I couldn't let her lose herself... And more than anything, I couldn't let myself lose her.

•••••

who yall got? satoru or suguru? 🥵

my heart pulls me to gojo, but somethin else pulls me to geto if u kno what i mean ☠️