《mi reina》15- im already ruined

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LIAM

-

it's been 2 days. I haven't heard from my Violet yet.

Fuck i don't know what's happening. She's getting in my head. I always am thinking about her, i want to protect her and hold her and tell her she'll be okay.

I don't know what I'm doing. How do i fix it? Where did i go wrong.

"Dude what did you do to her?" Alex asked while sitting down.

"I don't know man, she just left." I sighed.

"So let me get this straight- she woke up crying saying she's sorry and she should leave and shit?" Bradyon asked while eating a burrito.

"Yeah, she kept saying she's sorry and it's her fault and she should go."

"Man sounds like she wanted to leave. I mean she'll come back i bet. You guys were perfect for eachother." Alex said while eating.

"No dude, she didn't want to leave but she did. I could see it in her eyes i just- i just can't figure it out."

"Have you called or texted?"

"Obviously i texted."

"Called?"

"Uh no i guess not."

"Man try calling her. I've never seen you actually care about some girl ever since skylar-"

"Shut the fuck up. You know what just get out both of you."

"Fine Dude, we'll give you space but take a shower and get some sleep. You cant stress about her all day and night." Alex said as him and braydon got up.

"Call her." Braydon said as they walked out and shut the door. Just like Violet did.

Fuck i don't know what to do. What do i say? How do i act? Does she even want me?

Fuck it I'm calling her.

"Hello?" A unfamiliar voice picked up her phone.

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"Hey- Violet?!"

"Who's this? Where's violet? Is she okay?"

"She's fine. Who's this?"

"Liam? Liam james her friend."

"Ohhh you're the famous Liam" she said as she giggled.

"Yeah yeah so where violet?" I asked and i heard violet whispering in the back.

"Tell him I'm busy- that I'm dead! No uh idk say i cant pick up- yeah Liam she's right here! You can come over at likeeee 6? Yeah 6 she lives in the black apartments on 10th street, room 711. Key is under the plant,See ya bye!" The voice said as they hung up.

Well fuck i guess I'm going over at 6.

-

5:58

Fuck I'm kind of nervous...? I've never been like this. Sweaty palms. I even planned out what I'll say and everything.

Okay let's do this. I knocked on the room 711 3 times, "Violet you there?"

I heard shuffling on the other side of the door.

"Violet i know you're there!" I said. Then remembered the key under the plant. I lifted up the odd looking dead plant and sure enough there was a key.

Is this illegal? Eh i don't care. I opened the door and looked around. No sign of violet. "Violet? You here?"

"BOO!"

"Shit!" I yelled and turned around to see violet laughing on the ground.

"Shit Violet! I almost punched you! Are you okay oh my God," i said as i kneeled next to her.

"Yeah-you-you just-" she said trying to catch her breath while laughing.

"Jesus violet, cmon." I said picking her up and going to the couch.

"That was so- oh my- you went- oh shit!-" she said trying to mock me in a deep voice.

"Okay okay violet i get it"

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"Ha, okay- wait what are you doing here?" She said finally calming down.

"Someone called me and said to come over"

"Huh? Oh fuck. Amelia. I'm gonna fuck her up for this," she said while scratching her head confused.

"Yeah so can we talk?"

"Ughhh Liam go home please," she groaned.

"Violet no let's talk"

"Ugh fine what?"

"What happened? Did i do something? If so I'm sorry, for whatever i did I'm sorry-"

"Liam it's not you. It's just me. I'm the problem. You know i just don't want to hurt you." She said playing with her bracelets.

"Violet, why would you hurt me? Is it because of your nightmares? Violet it's okay- i get them too- i mean it just doesn't bother me."

"I know i know, but i just ruin everything!" She said standing up, "everything i touch i ruin, everyone i talk to to ruin. And when I'm with you I'm happy, and i don't deserve to be happy- see I'm doing it again, I'm yelling at you, I'm ruining you. And i don't want to ruin you-"

"Violet-" i said standing up too, " you won't ruin me, i promise-"

"No they all say that! And then i trust them, and then this happens, and i can't do it anymore! I cant do it to you too! Please stop, and go home! I don't want to ruin you-"

"I'm already ruined violet-"

Silence.

"W-what?"

"I said I'm already ruined- you can't ruin me. I'm ruined. I'm scared I'll ruin you but I'm so goddamn selfish I'm willing to take a chance just to be with you!" I said while looked at her. She looked shocked- at a loss of words.

"Liam-"

"Violet. Please don't run. I'm right here. I'm so scared of what will happen but i don't care. I just want to be around you. I want to talk to you and hear you talk about random things i didn't even ask about, and your laugh, and oh God your smile. It's so pretty. Please Violet. Don't run."

"Liam..." she said walking closer to me.

Then she hugged me.

"I'm sorry. I'm just scared. So scared..." she said as i hugged back and rubbed her back.

" i know violet me too."

"Can you spend the night? If you want to, i mean I'll probably have a nightmare-so you don't have to stay-"

"Of course I'll stay." I said and she smiled. The smile i missed.

"Okay, in the room? I can sleep in the couch-"

"Violet. We can sleep in the room." I said as she pulled my hand to her room. We got under the covers and i put my arms around her and we both fell asleep. With eachother.

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