think first, then react

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ue felt hot and angry. Her leg bounced quickly under the table as she tried to wipe her bleeding nose with her hands. She stared at the crimson red stain on her hands for a long minute before realizing how her hands trembled violently. Rue closed them into a tight fist, letting her nails dig in her palms before she opened her hands again. She sighed after noticing they still trembled.

Embarrassment eventually duelled onto her mind. It was heavy, like a sack of sand had been suddenly thrown over her shoulders. She couldn't believe she had started a public fist fight against Jake and lost. In front of everyone. It would have been better if he had killed her so she wouldn't have to live with the embarrassment and he'd suffer from the guilt for the rest of his tragic life.

Rue only looked up from her bloody hands after someone had walked up to her. She half expected it to be the paramedic again—the manager of Rink-O-Mania had called an ambulance after spotting what remained from the fight. Rue had refused to be treated by a paramedic for fear of incurring a large medical bill that Joyce would have to pay at the end of the day. Angela, on the other hand, was not stable enough to refuse. Rue was proud of El for punching her so hard that she was absolutely disoriented and out of it.

Mike Wheeler approached Rue, holding a first-aid kit. She let her lips part in surprise and gaped for a second. She could have expected anyone but Mike to be willing to assist her, including Janice Banner. In pure Mike Wheeler manner, Mike scoffed, "You're an idiot."

Rue didn't say anything, and she watched as Mike sat next to her, opening the first aid kit and digging inside. Rue fought the urge to smile at Mike's worried antics, and she made sure to use this against him in the future.

Mike turned to look at Rue again, and he narrowed his brows as he looked into her eyes.

"What are you doing?" Rue asked slowly.

"Checking for a concussion."

Rue chuckled, and then Mike did too. She wondered if she did have a concussion because she just laughed with Mike, not at him. She forced herself to stop and let him continue, silently grateful while also silently questioning if he knew what he was doing.

Mike frowned, and he hesitated before moving closer, not wanting Rue to lash out at him the same way she had to Jake fifteen minutes ago. Mike brought his hand up and began to clean the blood from Rue's face with a disinfected wipe from the first aid kit.

Rue didn't fight it, letting him swipe the cold, wet wipe across her cheek, under her nose, across her jaw and above her eyebrow. She feels as if she's watching herself watch him patch her up, and it all happens slowly. His hesitant movements and careful brushes. A shadow casts on Mike's face from his hat, and he presses a bandage on the side of Rue's face. He treated her almost as if they are friends.

"If I didn't know any better," Rue started, letting herself smile at him as he put down a bloody napkin. Mike raised his brows at Rue, watching as she tucked her knees to her chest. "I'd say you care about me, Mike Wheeler."

The softened features in Mike's face vanished, and he rolled his eyes. He returned to his usual demeanour and scoffed. "Don't get your hopes up," he grumbled. Mike shivered and pushed a large space between them, almost as if he was disgusted to be so near to her for so long. He stood up and said, "this will never happen again."

After Mike left to stand with Alex and Will, Jonathan and Argyle pushed their way through the crowd. Everyone in Rink-O-Mania had stopped what they were doing and crowded near the booths of the building, watching and whispering as Paramedics did their jobs and cops questioned Angela and her friends.

Dozens of eyes glared at Eleven, who sat by herself and away from everyone. She shut herself out from the world and stared at the ground blankly. Angry and guilty tears slipped from her glossy eyes while her body trembled.

Rue lowered her feet off the bench. She cautiously rose from the seat, her gaze fixed on her crying sister, who shivered in need of comfort. As Rue stood up, there was a faint ringing in her ears, and the throbbing on the side of her head became stronger the further she pushed herself to walk. Rue's hands never stopped shaking, and she could feel the blood rushing to her nose as she took hesitant steps toward El.

After catching it out of the corner of her eyes, a foggy image of someone heading towards her clouded her consciousness. Rue only came to a halt when Ember appeared in front of her. The girl raised her eyes to Rue before pursing her lips. "You're okay, right?" She asked.

Rue's eyes darted back and forth from El to Ember. She sighed before looking down at Ember, "Yeah. I just need to—"

"I would have totally helped you clean up," She said exasperatedly, cutting Rue off completely, "It's that I have this big fear of blood, and I told Nate to give you space and if I ran over to you, I would have been extremely hypocritical. Now, that I think about it, talking to you right now is hypocritical-"

"Ember," Rue said. Her headache only seems to increase within the passing seconds. Rue held onto Ember's shoulders to stop her from rambling and getting her attention. "It's okay." She reassured her. "It's nothing a good night's sleep won't fix. Honestly, I swear," she added when Ember looked at her helplessly.

"Okay," Ember finally nodded. She sucked in a sharp breath of air while dropping her head. Her hair fell over her face, covering it like a curtain. Ember continued to nod before glancing back up at Rue again. The look in her eyes scared Rue into letting go of her shoulders. Ember winced and stepped back. "Uhm—"

"Ruby," Argyle's voice tore Rue's attention away from Ember's hurt expression. Rue turned around to find him holding his hand out for her to take. Mike, Alex and Will were behind him, ready to go home. "Let's get out of here."

Rue faced Ember again and looked over her shoulder. She spotted Jonathan trying to talk to El before leading her towards the exit of Rink-O-Mania. "I'll talk to you tomorrow," She told her, "Okay?"

Ember nodded, "Okay."

Rue had left Argyle to lead her out of Rink-O-Mania. She held his hand while he pushed open the doors of the building and the hot air blowing at their faces. He carried a strong stench of weed with him that was pathetically covered with cheap cologne. Argyle helped Rue climb into the van and joined the rest of the kids before he shut the door and joined Jonathan at the front.

Half of the drive back home was spent in silence. The silence was so deafening that Jonathan's music didn't even assist. There is a painful tension in the silence that has grown within each of the five teens sitting in the backseats. They didn't look at each other and pretended to be distracted by glancing out the window or fiddling with their shoe laces.

Rue stared at her trembling hands as she recalled the whole day in the back of her head. She could still feel that buzz on her fingertips. It hadn't gone away since she held the hand of that man, since she grasped it tightly and pulled herself to stand. After he was gone, the buzz lingered as a reminder to him that he was real.

Rue didn't understand it.

My fist of vengeance, my fallen angel, you will lead them all to their defeat.

His words echoed in her ear and left a mark on her thoughts. Rue was confused once more. Were his statements a note of caution? A prophecy? Who would Rue be leading to their defeat? What the hell was a Celestial?

None of it made sense to her, and she wasn't sure whether she wanted to know. But she was still curious about who the man was. Is he some kind of guardian angel? Could he be a sign of things to come? A guide?

Rue wouldn't be surprised if paranormal things happened to her, given all else she'd been through. The longer she thought about it, a furrow formed between her brows, and the pounding in her brain worsened as blood flowed down her nose. Rue brushed it away with her shirt hem, hoping no one noticed.

Argyle finally broke the tension inside the van, his voice a low rasp, "I know this may be, like, upsetting and shit, but that future prom queen is gonna be fine," He turned to look at the kids in the back for a moment, "It's just, like, rubber wheels."

"Plastic," Jonathan corrected.

Argyle turned to look back at the road again. "Ooh."

"Not, like, hard plastic," Jonathan added after a beat, and he sighed, "Just the soft kind."

"Totally," Argyle nodded. "But you ever wonder why the wheels aren't wood, man? Or metal? So people don't get hurt when they get shmacked!"

"Oh!"

"Yeah. Because it happens more than you think, man." Argyle turned to El again, "Roller skate attacks."

In another attempt to make El feel better about her guilty conscience, Jonathan said, "Hey, at least it wasn't an ice skate."

Argyle gasped, "That nose would've been sliced clean off, man!"

"Oh!" Jonathan exclaimed, cupping his nose.

"It could've been so much worse," Argyle laughed.

"So much worse." Jonathan agreed. "In the grand scheme of things, it's just a little blip."

"That's a funny word, man." Argyle chuckled.

"Blip."

"Blip!"

"Blip!"

"Blip."

Before they knew it, Jonathan and Argyle had begun to say blip in the beat of circus music. The five kids in the back shared tired looks with each other while the two older teenagers grew louder and louder. Neither of them had stopped until Argyle had parked his van in the driveway and shut off the engine.

Everyone clambered to get out as fast as they could, and Mike and Alex rushed to get their suitcases from the trunk. Will helped Rue get down, even after she protested and swore she could do it herself. "I'm not dying, William."

Will wasn't hearing any of it, and he held her arms while she climbed out of the van. He was obviously mad at her for starting the fight, and Rue wouldn't be surprised if he gave her the silent treatment for the rest of the night.

El was the one who had unlocked the door. She was the first to enter, and everyone else followed. The fragrance of food wafted into their faces as they entered, and loud opera music played throughout the house. Rue and El exchanged a puzzled look as they moved deeper inside the home, leaving the boys behind. Joyce never listened to opera music, and they were sceptical that they even owned any recordings or CDs in that genre.

"Mom?" Will shouted over the music, and Jonathan shut the front door.

Rue's uncertainty deepened once she came to a halt behind El. Murray Bauman was the last person she expected to see in their kitchen. Rue had last seen him in Starcourt last summer, and now he was cooking in her kitchen while wearing one of the aprons El had given Joyce for Christmas.

The man came to a halt and turned to face the group. He smiled at them and placed one of the pots on the little kitchen counter. "All right!" He exclaimed, warmly smiling at the children. "Aren't you lot a sight for sore eyes, huh?"

Jonathan seemed to be the only one of them pleased to see the man. He waved and smiled lazily, "Hi, Murray."

Murray leaned on the kitchen island and held up a wooden spoon. "You kids like risotto?"

Jonathan snickered, "Yeah."

The sound of distress over the music had grabbed the children's attention. All seven of them turned slowly towards the stairs, where Joyce stood at the top. She was carrying books and boxes in her arms, and her eyes widened when she noticed all the kids in her living room. Joyce dashed back into her room, putting away the books and boxes before sprinting down to greet everyone.

"Mike, Alex!" She approached the two visitors with wide open arms and a broad smile. Joyce snatched the two boys into her arms, oblivious to the fact that they had to lean down to hug her. "Oh, my goodness! Look at you!" She squealed and pinched their cheeks, thrilled at the sight of them. "You're all grown up." Her eyes were glossy as she smiled at them.

A smile broke into Mike's face as he looked down at Joyce. "It's good to see you too, Miss Byers."

"Oh!" Joyce rolled her eyes and blushed. She drew them back down for another hug before eventually letting them go. Joyce squeezed her youngest son's shoulder and motioned the three boys away. "Will, baby, go help them put their bags away before dinner."

She turned to Jonathan and Argyle, "You two, go get the table. El—Oh, El, what happened?" Joyce rushed to Eleven's side as Jonathan and Argyle made their way towards the kitchen with Murray.

Joyce cupped El's cheeks with her hands, and she wiped away the stained tears with her thumbs. El leaned closer to Joyce's touch as the woman frowned and looked down at her ruined dress. When El didn't say anything, Joyce smiled sadly. "Go get changed, take a shower if you need to. We'll talk later, alright?"

El nodded slowly and stepped away from Joyce. The girl pressed her palms to her eyes before running up the stairs.

Rue's eyes widened when Joyce turned to her. She looked down at her feet and hurried to chase after El, but Joyce beat her to it. "And what happened to you?" Joyce asked, stepping in the way between Rue and the stairs.

Murray's loud opera music still played loudly around the house, and now his conversation with Jonathan and Argyle was louder as the three of them laughed loudly in the kitchen.

Rue shrugged, her hands balling into tight fists at her side to prevent them from trembling. "Nothing," she said quickly, and she pursed her lips when Joyce raised her brows at her, clearly not convinced. "I just got into a little argument, that's all."

Joyce sighed, "Did that argument have something to do with what happened to El?" When Rue continued to stare at her shoes, Joyce frowned deeper. "Rue, what has Doctor Monroe told you about expressing your feelings through healthy behaviour?"

Rue rolled her eyes and groaned childishly. She restated her therapist's instructions, "Think first, then react."

"Think first, then react," Joyce nodded. The woman brought her hand up to Rue's face, and her fingers were feather-light as she brushed them over Rue's bruises. She sighed again, "you're alright, aren't you?"

Rue smiled, "Always."

"Good," Joyce grinned, "Now, go fix yourself up. Dinner's almost ready.

Rue walked up the stairs, her mind set on laying on her bed for a good five minutes, but then she remembered Mike was staying in her room for the week. A tired sigh slipped from her lips as she turned on her heels towards another room, and she saw light slip out from the three-inch crack in El's bedroom door.

Rue heard her shuffling around in there as she stepped closer. She stood before the door for a long minute, staring at the wood. She tried to imagine what happened to El while she was gone, what Angela had done. Rue already knew there had been a drink spilled on her, but it seemed worse than that. El was more than just embarrassed; she was angry and sad. Rue could feel it from a mile away.

Rue raised her fist and knocked on the door. "El?" She called. Rue heard all movement stop from the other side of the door, but there was no answer. She knocked again, "El, it's me. Can I come in? We're supposed to be roommates for the week, remember?"

El's shadow grew from the crack on the door as she neared it. The girl seemed to hesitate before she pulled the door open, letting Rue inside.

The first thing Rue noticed was the sorrow and guilt that spilled from El. Then she noticed El standing before her, her hair wet and soaking the blue sweater she had put on. She could see El's eyes were red, along with her nose, but there were no signs of tears other than El's wet eyelashes. El wiped her nose with the sleeve of her sweater and stepped out of the way to let Rue in.

Rue walked into the room and watched as Eleven kept the door open three inches. The act made her want to wince as she remembered the letter Hopper had written for El, but she bit her tongue to stop herself from doing so.

El walked past Rue and sat before her dresser, and she remained quiet while brushing her wet hair. Echoes of Murray's music still sounded through the floorboards, and the smell of food had finally reached upstairs.

Rue sat down on El's bed and kicked off her shoes while her stomach grumbled quietly. She hummed softly as she thought about what to say. Rue caught El's eye from the mirror of the dresser, and El quickly looked another way. Rue frowned and looked out the window, where the moon was new, and stars littered the sky.

Rue sighed dramatically and laid back on El's bed. She grinned after looking up at El's roof, where Rue's old stick-on stars were scattered all over it. Basking in the silence between them, Rue began to undo the braids in her hair, hoping it would help her throbbing headache. Rue ran her fingers through her scalp and closed her eyes. She thought about that man again; his words, his promise.

"Your time has come," he had said. "Let us feel your wrath, Celestial. Bring them all to their demise. My fist of vengeance, my fallen angel, you will lead them all to their defeat."

Rue rolled over on El's bed and groaned again when her Walkman stabbed against her hip. She removed the headphones from around her neck and pulled the Walkman off the waistline of her shorts. Her fingers traced the patterns of the soft fabric of El's covers.

"Don't show any signs of weakness. You are not weak."

He reminded her a lot of that voice she had in her head last summer. Of the bright light that saved her. At the time, Rue swore it was her mother, but now she wasn't so sure. It couldn't have been Emilia. It just didn't make sense.

"Rue?" She heard El's voice call her name.

The girl pushed herself to sit on the bed, and her hair fell over her face. Rue's world spun for a second or four, and she had to blink a few times to focus. "Hmm, yeah?"

El had gotten up from her seat before the dresser and stood at the end of her bed. She hesitated before sitting next to Rue and laid her head on her shoulder. Rue was quick to wrap her arm over El and hugged her closely. "What is it?"