《To: Spider-Dweeb (P. Parker x Reader)》✆ 𝙲𝚘𝚏𝚏𝚎𝚎 𝚂𝚒𝚍𝚎 𝙴𝚏𝚏𝚎𝚌𝚝𝚜 ✆
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╔ Regular- (y/n) ╗
I think baseball hats are magical
Like when I wear baseball hats I'm suddenly like 1000x hotter
Which is saying something because without a baseball hat I'm as pretty as a blob fish
Blaze it!
Kidding!
Don't do drugs, kids
Drugs are bad
You answered
Don't blame me
I'm just the innocent bystander
Eh, whatever helps you sleep at night I guess
I came out here to have a good time and, honestly, I'm feeling so attacked right now
Suck my dick, Parker
So what I'm hearing is that if I had one, you would suck it
Like how I put my oh so real dick in it
So, back to why I called you!
Baseball hats are like a gift from the heavens
I put one on and then I'm suddenly Aphrodite
Because I haven't slept in like three days and have consumed maybe twenty-seven cups of coffee within that period of time
I JUST ORDERED A SHIT LOAD OF HATS OFF OF AMAZON!
PETER, BE PROUD OF ME!
But, Peter, baseball hats!
So I've been told
So long, loser
Hope you rot in hell
✆✆
╔ Regular- (y/n) ╗
Oops
That depends on how you look at the situation
So like I was in ap chem doing my lab like the good student I am
Peter, shut up and let me speak
As I was saying before I was rudely interrupted, I was finishing up the equations while my partner went to get the chemicals we needed
So when they came back, they poured one chemical into the beaker and I poured in the other one because teamwork!
Turns out they grabbed the wrong chemical and boom! We're in quarantine
I am confusion
I should probably check out of this conversation but like... I'm intrigued
Just gonna put this out there but we're free now
And the other kid is getting a week detention apparently. I'm in the clear
No jail for me!
I NEED EVERYONE TO LISTEN UP
Yes or no. Do baseball hats make people hotter?
Yes this again
Ok nvm. The queens have spoken so I've concluded that the answer is yes
I've have drank 35 cups of coffee within the past 4 or so days
It's a skill I possess
My claim that I'm Asgardian has finally been proven!
⚡️⚡️
Yup! It's me, Peter, and our friend Ned!
Good
O.o
Did you just admit that Thor is better than you?!
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- In Serial25 Chapters
Filters
In March of 1954, Earth is covered in a month-long fog. This is what follows. (Updates Fridays)
8 325 - In Serial6 Chapters
Comfort Creatures: The Case of the Rogue Creature!
In a future of bottomline-oriented global megacorporations, some people have chosen to have their Creature removed. Once you have your Creature removed, life becomes a breeze. You can clock in, do your job, and clock out without any problems. Meanwhile, your Creature can party like an animal, stumbling through the streets, getting into fights, and humping anything that moves. It’s a win-win situation! Except sometimes… sometimes Creatures go rogue. This is a COMPLETE story, one hundred percent finished.
8 189 - In Serial21 Chapters
Fragmented Realms
This is neither a fairy tale nor a happy story. This is the story of a man, a man whose sole wish was to achieve the peak of swordsmanship. Alas, fate had other plans for him. Finding himself, in a place where many wouldn’t even dare to so much as set a foot in and with no recollection of himself, he wakes up. His journey will be thorny, his beliefs will be shattered, his screams will be heard and his tears will run dry... Will he prevail through the countless hurdles awaiting him? Or will he end up broken by the end of it? Join Reizel, as he travels through the shattered world of Fragmented Realms and you will find out. ~~~ Author's note: First things first, thank you for reading. I hope you enjoy the story as much as I like writing it. Updates will be weekly for now, so take it slow and feel free to check back once in a while. Feedback is always welcome and so is constructive criticism. I wish you have a great read and I'll see you again later!
8 86 - In Serial108 Chapters
Displacement
or, Deux Navires Passant dans la Nuit If you wake up in a new world, with only your memories of home to guide you, you have to trust the first people you meet. The first people Leah meets seem to know her - but not her. Leah is thrust into a fighter's role that does not quite suit her, and those who 'rescued' her do their best to help her fit in. They hint at a world that Leah can only vaguely understand without serious research and exploration, but how to do that research, when everyone believes her to be a local of this place, and too many questions might draw unwanted attention? And what about home? The more Leah learns about this world, the less she believes that she woke up on the right side of the bed - or more accurately, on the right side of the conflict. With magic being strictly regulated in her current "home," maybe it's time to uproot and look for a new set of allies... -- Displacement is a queer / lgbt bodyswap isekai: Leah Armande falls out of a Quebecois city into an unfamiliar fantasy world, and Leah Talesh falls out of her adventuring party's homeland and into an unfamiliar industrial world. The story follows both women as they navigate their new surroundings, trying at times to find a way home, at times just to pass for a local, and at times to actually make a life for themselves in their new world. Expect in-depth politics and worldbuilding, sapphic moments, foibles, and far too much time spent either in libraries or convalescing (or sometimes both).
8 225 - In Serial11 Chapters
The Sanctuary Core
Summoned to balance the miasmas of Dungeons, so called Sanctuaries- everything opposite of what a dungeon is and does, serve to counter death with life and bring balance to the world. Serving as a Sanctuary Master in charge of managing one of these defenses, Thomas Cutter is pulled from his own world along with his home. Aided by a helpful nymph and a magical book for controlling his territory, Tom must grow his lands enough to halt the dungeon that lay deep in the southern mountains or die in failure. Disclaimer / Author’s note: I’m writing this story purely as something to do. If you choose to read it, I’m glad, but it’s certainly more written for my own enjoyment than anyone else’s, so… sorry if it’s not for you. With that, do be gracious with me, as well as offer whatever helpful criticisms you might have. I’d be much obliged. Enjoy!
8 173 - In Serial17 Chapters
written experiments
Some short stories, sketches, experiments and more ... Have fun reading ...Toni
8 229
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