✆✆

╔ Regular- (y/n) ╗

I think baseball hats are magical

Like when I wear baseball hats I'm suddenly like 1000x hotter

Which is saying something because without a baseball hat I'm as pretty as a blob fish

Blaze it!

Kidding!

Don't do drugs, kids

Drugs are bad

You answered

Don't blame me

I'm just the innocent bystander

Eh, whatever helps you sleep at night I guess

I came out here to have a good time and, honestly, I'm feeling so attacked right now

Suck my dick, Parker

So what I'm hearing is that if I had one, you would suck it

Like how I put my oh so real dick in it

So, back to why I called you!

Baseball hats are like a gift from the heavens

I put one on and then I'm suddenly Aphrodite

Because I haven't slept in like three days and have consumed maybe twenty-seven cups of coffee within that period of time

I JUST ORDERED A SHIT LOAD OF HATS OFF OF AMAZON!

PETER, BE PROUD OF ME!

But, Peter, baseball hats!

So I've been told

So long, loser

Hope you rot in hell

✆✆

╔ Regular- (y/n) ╗

Oops

That depends on how you look at the situation

So like I was in ap chem doing my lab like the good student I am

Peter, shut up and let me speak

As I was saying before I was rudely interrupted, I was finishing up the equations while my partner went to get the chemicals we needed

So when they came back, they poured one chemical into the beaker and I poured in the other one because teamwork!

Turns out they grabbed the wrong chemical and boom! We're in quarantine

I am confusion

I should probably check out of this conversation but like... I'm intrigued

Just gonna put this out there but we're free now

And the other kid is getting a week detention apparently. I'm in the clear

No jail for me!

I NEED EVERYONE TO LISTEN UP

Yes or no. Do baseball hats make people hotter?

Yes this again

Ok nvm. The queens have spoken so I've concluded that the answer is yes

I've have drank 35 cups of coffee within the past 4 or so days

It's a skill I possess

My claim that I'm Asgardian has finally been proven!

⚡️⚡️

Yup! It's me, Peter, and our friend Ned!

Good

O.o

Did you just admit that Thor is better than you?!