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╔ Regular- (y/n) ╗

Spiderman, Spiderman,

Does whatever a spider can.

Spins a web, any size.

Catches thieves- just like flies.

Look out! Here comes the Spiderman.

Because that's boring...?

Honestly, Peter, I thought you were supposed to be smart

And I wasn't saying hello, I was saying I just saw you swinging overhead

I didn't

I stumbled upon it on YouTube

You know you've made it in life when you have your own theme song

Be proud, Peter

Technically, the Avengers do too

It's very catchy

Like, if they had a movie about them, it would be the song associated with badass team up moments and stuff

And during the title card

It's what I do in my spare time

Do you think there's a multiverse where all you superheroes are part of a movie franchise?

I want to visit that universe and watch all the movies

Obviously

Now get your spandex clad ass back down the street so we can begin our search

I make no promises

I'm by Delmar's

I'll be waiting

Try to make it out alive, Spider-Dweeb

I need my multiverse searching partner

Plus, I don't think anyone would be happy to hear you let yourself get killed

I've seen you fight

You suck

Obviously you're better than me, but like for a crime fighter you're awful

My mother is a good woman

When I asked her to adopt me she said yes, therefore Natasha Romanoff the kickass Black Widow is my mother

She just needs to sign the adoption papers

And her name is Natasha Romanoff

I'm aware, Peter

No stop talking and save some lives

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╔ Regular- (y/n) ╗

I have gathered you here today because I need to prove a point to Peter

You're my new mother and Peter refuses to believe it

YES DO THAT PLEASE

Do it! Do it! Do it!

So what I'm hearing is that if I can convince them, you'd potentially get partial guardianship over me

I LOVE YOU WITH ALL MY HEART

One more thing

I need a favor that you might be willing to assist me

Peter's a little shit and refuses to figure out a way for me to met Thor

And this is exactly why you're the best

I love coffee

I may or may not be crying tears of joy

I feel so unprepared to meet you two

You guys are like legends

I can't believe I'm going to have coffee with two of my favorite people ever!

They could go rot for all I care

I love them and all but like IM GETTING COFFEE WITH BLACK WIDOW AND A LITERAL GOD

That's like every child's dream come true

I'm so going to rub this in Peter's face when he gets back from being Spidey

Thank you so much Natasha!

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╔ Regular- (y/n) ╗

I was but then I got sidetracked while texting Natasha and got myself lost

Never mind, I just ran into the dumpster behind Delmar's

I'm getting coffee with Natasha and Thor tomorrow because they're my new parents

Thor doesn't know it yet, but I'm now his daughter

You can ask them yourselves tomorrow

I see you

Turn around, Peter

Really?

Who would have thought