《To: Spider-Dweeb (P. Parker x Reader)》✆ 𝙲𝚛𝚢𝚒𝚗𝚐? 𝙽𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝙷𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚍 𝙾𝚏 𝙷𝚎𝚛 ✆
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╔ Regular- (y/n) ╗
Hey, Spider-Dweeb!
That's not true
Anyway, I'm thinking about messing with Flash but I needed your permission first
But you literally save Midtown all the time...
That's depressing
You should ask for a commission
Only if I get 30% of your earnings
Back to my point though
I appose that I claim I know Spider-Man and feed Flash so called "facts" about Spider-Man
Because it would be hilarious
Also because I just came across his YouTube channel that's dedicated to Spider-Man theories and facts
He also has a blog about you
It's oddly very detailed
As one should when they find out the biggest jerk in the universe idolizes their alter ego
You may as well be
Pretty sure just seeing Flash make a total fool of himself is worth it
Deal
I'll have to send you the links later because they're worth checking out
Also, hypothetically speaking, could I meet the Avengers
And by Avengers, I mean Thor
I love him so much
Dude, we literally have a group chat designated about Thor with Ned
Don't go telling me I have problems when you have just as big a crush on the god as I do
Peter, that's rude
Take that back!
I will not hesitate to send Ned's gif of your Thor impression to all of the Avengers!
Did you seriously just say freakin?
That's so sad
If I say it, will my phone shock me?
YOU HAD A BUILDING DROPPED ON YOU?!
HOW THE HELL DID YOU GET OUT?!
Ha!
Sorry, it wasn't funny
Who am I kidding?
That was hilarious!
Karma
Are you really that bad of a driver?
I'm in shock right now
So what I'm hearing is that when you were 15 you deliberately drove to what could have been your death?!
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Sure
Remember when about 3 minutes ago I asked if I could meet Thor?
I'm still waiting for an answer
But that's like a lot of work
Plus, I'm not sure if this new Asgard of his has reception
What if he says no?
I don't want to be rejected by a god
Peter, you know he wouldn't let you do that
Did you just choke up?
Are you crying because Thor won't let you die for him?
I can literally hear you sobbing over the phone, Pete
Once I started crying in the middle of history class because I remembered this picture of
Thor that was posted on Facebook back in 2011
Yeah
Dammit, Peter!
Now I'm crying!
Look what you made me do!
Same here
These tears don't seem to stop
I don't know
All I know is that I look like a panda now
This is the exact reason why I don't like crying
The second hand embarrassment is real
My mom just texted me to see if I was ok because she heard me crying in my room
I had to tell her I was just thinking about Thor
Yeah, cool
Later, Spider-Dweeb!
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