: I hate this dumb ass bitch elmo

: fuck me!!! 😩

: ok. 😉😏

: *rapidly hits Elmo w a bat*

: Eds, really?

: I'm so fucking sick and tired

: of the photoshop

: no, I'm just sick, and tired

: I have a cold, and a headache, and my mom keeps yelling at me bc she thinks that I didn't sanitize my hands enough

: aww does my little Edward spaghedward need me to come over and bring him some medicine

: there is no cure for the common cold richie

: but all my lovin would heal you right up

: can I ask you something

: yeah, sure

: you get hit on a lot right?

: yeah.. I guess

: that wasn't the question btw

: ok...

: how do you turn people down politely

: just say sorry I have a boyfriend

: they don't believe me

: show them my instagram, they'd believe you then

: can you turn them down for me???

: how?

: they are sliding into my dm's on ig

: I'll give you my password

: idk if I'm comfortable having your password, that's a lot of power

: I'll change it after you're done

: fine

: k so my password is... don't judge me okay?

: that's a weird password

: 😒

: it's 'zoowiemamaimgay768'

: I was obsessed with doawk and I wanted my password to be extra secure so I made it longer and added numbers

: Eds, that is single handily the worst and best password in the fucking world

: yeah well....

: I'll txt you when I'm done putting these sobs down

: sobs?

: sons of bitches

: lol

: ttyl bb😘😘

-on instagram-

travis

Hi, Eddie. Im travis young. I go to your school. You probably don't know me, I'm just a nobody.

I just wanted to say that I thought it was really cool of you to stand up to Eric and Wade like that.

Also, I know this is really weird, but I think that you're really cute.

You are gay... right?

Cause, you said you were... and you've been reading these.

Did I do something wrong?

Omg the only other gay kid out at our school and he doesn't even reply.

I'm so sorry for like ^^^ that whole mess there.

Yeah.. bye.

kaspbrak

Travis, hi. Um, so here's the thing...

I'm not really looking for a new relationship.

I'm in one right now.

It's sorta like a threesome thing.

Ya see this is richie, I love him with my whole heart

Hot, isn't he

And this is his boyfriend Stan

Stan's the monkey.

travis

Really?

kaspbrak

No.

This is what stan looks like now

He's hot too

Sorry for this disappointing news.

Hope we can be friends!!!

He's also taken... sorry

—-

anothermadeupname_

Hey hottie

Wanna fuck?

I bet you'd be an amazing submissive whore for me

Screaming out my name while I'm pounding the shit out of you

Damn. Just thinking it is making me hard

You should come to my house later this week. I'll fuck you so good you won't be able to walk for a week

kaspbrak

Fuck no

Fuck off

Blocked

Reported

Cancelled

Don't bother responding

I'm actually blocking you

—-

brucewaynestwin

Ur gay?

Me too

We should get married

Not like in a weird way...

But like in a your hot I wanna fuck you till I die type way

kaspbrak

1) I'm taken

2) youre*

3) no thanks.

—-

danniel

*sends dick pic*

Wanna fuck?

kaspbrak

Lmao no.

Ur dick is small

And I have a boyfriend who said he was gonna marry me when we graduate

danniel

Gay.

—-

simplykyle

Hi.

kaspbrak

Hello?

simplykyle

You went to Derry high right

kaspbrak

Mm yeah..?

simplykyle

Didn't you like date Henry?

kaspbrak

We didn't date... really

simplykyle

But you were FuCk buddies??

kaspbrak

Yeah, but I'm not seeing him anymore, I'm dating this totally rad guy who wants to fuck me so bad but I keep leaving him high and dry

But I'll fuck him soon enough, we've made plans, I love him and he loves me

Bye.😊

simplykyle

Yeah, bye I guess

-richie to Eddie-

: all done sweet cheeks

: I was mean to some of them

: all they wanted was sex. It was disgusting

: I know

: one of them sent a dick pic of his puny peen

: people are disgusting

: thanks Richie. 😘

: please don't ever fuck any of them

: wouldn't dream of it

: I mean it

: I know Richie

: who would talk to a human like that

: "wanna fuck?"

: you??

: but I do it as a joke.

: I never mean it..

: well I do, but I'm not gonna call you gay if you say no

: Richie it's fine

: I fucking hate them

: it's okay richie.

: I'm just pissed

: I know

: I wish I was with you

: I know

: I just want to kiss you and hug you right now

: ditto

: I can't stand this

: it's only been a fucking week

: I know