; hey eds

; hey rich. i asked u to stop calling me that... so like STOP

; eddie, have you seen that clown from McDonald's that hides from gay people?

; no

; hahahaahah, of course, you haven't

; wow richie. that was good

; really!?

; yup. almost as good as how i fucked ur best friend.

; YOU FUCKED STAN!

; no.

; i thought u were gay, why did u fuck bev?

; no no no I am talking about bill

; hmm, sounds french to me

; fake*

; yeah bill has a French accent when he gets fucked how did u know?

; bahahahahahha

; anyway, guess who is transferring to a different class next week

; is it my dear friend Mike?

; no.

; my amazing friend Bencil?

; Bencil? and no

; oh i know. my lover henry bowers. he wants to spend more time with me.

; didnt he shit in ur backpack

; yeah, that was in 9th grade tho. a whole 3 years ago

; anyway... well i am moving into ur math class... i hope henry isnt but i know i am

; aww little eddie bear wanted to see more of me thats so sweet

; no. its just my other math class was too easy for me, they are making me go into ur class

;Bev will be happy about this news. im not so sure my girlfriend will be, or stan, but hey i love ya anyway eds

Eddie; u have a girlfriend?

; yeah

; u? trash mouth tozier? a girlfriend?

; yeah.

; okay whats her name

; sonia kaspbrak

; ASDJFNIRFUGTUWICNU

; how do u know my moms name?

; i asked bev

; wow

; anyway her name is Diane

; does she go to our school

; no. i met her at summer camp

; huh. cool.

; eddie are you jealous?

; wtf no. i dont even like you. i told u already.

; just making sure babe. i wouldnt want u sexually frustrated

; beep beep richie

; did u just beep at me?

; yes, yes i did

; i feel honored. only stan bve and bill do that

; ok then

; alrighty now if u will excuse me, i have to go have a chat with billiam

; ??? okay then. buh bye

; bye bye gay boy ;) -3-

; whats '-3-'?

; its a kissy face

; y not just use emojis?

; omg eds stop judging me.

; go talk to bill

; aye aye cap'in

--

; BILLIAMMMMMM

; what now?

; I have a bone to pick with you

; ok?

; well now that i think about it, its more like, i have a boner to pick with you

; ew wtf rich

; eds said that u guys fucked

; WHAT

; yeah, i couldnt believe it either

; tell him to stop lying

; he was lying?

; man, that boy sure is something

; u know u really should learn about sarcasm

; i speak fluent sarcasm. he was just making it sound rea

; omg what if he tells bev. then bev will think im gay.

; oh billiam we already know u are

; WHAT?!

; dont worry ur secret is safe with me bucko

; i wish i could slap u in the head with a frying pan right now

; ooo kinky. lets save that for the bedroom ok bill

; UUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH

; good talk