Akira

When I enter the room I hear laugh and I turn to find Luke and Sydney both are cuddled on couch watching TV. I try to walk as quietly I can not wanting to disturb their moment. They both look cute and so in love. Tenderness is clear on their face when they watch each other. Sydney loves him as much as he adore her. Devotion and affection is clear in their eyes.

Could I ever have this kind of devotion, these affections from anyone? My mind immediately reaches to that grey eyed boy, I just left. I don't understand him at all. Whatever his intentions are I don't get it. I shake my head to get rid of his thought or I'd just end up crying, like crybaby I'm.

I tip toe silently to the kitchen, taking a glass of milk. I pad into my room, letting myself in I close the door quietly behind me so they'd not be disturb and have their night pleasantly since I think Luke is going to spend this night here.

Not wanting to think anything about him, I decide to paint, that will somehow relax me. Jumping on my bed I take out my art book and start drawing. I draw some different angles of the library filled with book.

Feeling my eyes heavy, I decide its time to sleep. Placing my things back at there place, I pull in my comfy pyjama before finally laying down. I sigh as sleep finally envelopes me.

When I woke up next day I felt little down, since I've no job or class today so I planned to spend my whole day, holed up in my room with loads of work I've gotten from my last class and I also planned to do some of my works in advance so I won't have to worry about being left behind in future.

But it doesn't go as I planned because Sydney asked more like ordered me come with her and Luke to some restaurant where group are planning to have lunch. I declined her offer not wanting to face him. I'm not ready to face him just yet after his outburst and my almost breakdown but Sydney assured me that he won't be there. She told me that he'd be more likely in New York doing his business. It means after traumatising me yesterday he is back to his routine. It's clear that last night didn't effect him at all, like it did to me. He doesn't care.

So here I'm. In the back seat of Luke car as the car is moving to its destination. Since Syd is in passenger seat they both are teasing, laughing and murmuring sweet words to each other. Not wanting to intrude their moment, I zone them out. I have worn a skinny jeans and a tank top with my hairs up in a ponytail. I'm still feeling little off, maybe this'd help me.

Car stops as we reach to the front of a big expensive looking hotel. Luke helps Sydney to get out being a true gentleman, I don't wait for him to open my door and I step out, helping myself. I have never really understood these ethics. Handing his keys to valet, Luke turn to us smiling, he nods toward big glass door.

From the looks I've received from the doorman, clearly I don't fit in this neither does my clothe. I don't mind it at all, I'm okay with it. I know my place and it's not like I'm here to impress anyone.

Of course not.

As we reach our table or should I say our booth, I see Lucas, Adam and Slade are already there. Adam is the first one to notice us followed by Lucas and Slade. I greet each of them.

Adam smile at me, offering me a seat, "Hey."

I smile back at him, "Hi Adam, how life is treating you?"

He sighs dramatically, "Same old, same old. What 'bout you Miss Ray?"

I mimic his action, "Same old, same old." Bursting at the end, he too laughs along with me.

A waiter comes asking for order, I don't know what to order so I let Adam order for me since he is regular here he knows better than me. He promises its Chinese is best.

We continue our chatting after he leaves. Lucas also joins conversion telling about 'fucked up' date, he went yesterday.

"Yesterday was awful for me too." I unconsciously blurt out.

Uh uh.

Lucas raises his brow, "Why? What happened?" He asks.

Shit! Why did you say that?

"I... I actually went to look for job and i..it was h...hectic." I splutter as I try to form an answer.

"Did you get one?" Adam asks.

"Yes, I actually have a job now. I have to work as assistant in a library." I smile at the mention of my job. I can't wait to start my work there.

Syd turns to me with narrowed eyes, "You found a job and you haven't even told me."

I roll my eyes, "I just got it yesterday and I was going to tell you but you seemed very cozy and I didn't want to intrude." I smile teasingly.

She blushes at the mention of cozy. "Whatever." She mutters before turning her head back to Luke.

I giggle at her embarrassment, though I find it kind of cute.

Suddenly I feel a different attentiveness in the environment and I sense him before I actually see him.

I feel his eye on me when I turn to look at the entrance.

He is here.

Oh my god.

He is actually here.

I let out a silent gasp from the back of my throat.

Almost every female inside this room turns to look at him, he has this magnetic power around him that demands attention.

Oh why is he so beautiful?

In the total black attire he looks breathtaking. His ever sharp jaw is shaved making him more handsome. His leather jacket giving him look of a baddass. He is still staring me as he moves toward us with dominant and arrogant stride.

Once he is at our table, Slade breaks the silence, "Are not you supposed to be in New York?" He questions with a raised eyebrows.

Not giving him any glance, Romero, I mean King answers, "Changed my mind." Before taking the seat just opposite me.

I lower my head to avoid any eye contact. I feel my heart thumping loudly against my chest. I take few deep breath to calm my nerves but that doesn't help. I feel helpless that I can't even control my heart around him let alone my body. My whole body is aware of him and his proximity.

I'm aware of his eyes digging hole in my head but I still don't look at him. I squirm under his intense gaze and shift a little toward Adam for some invisible support. My this small effort doesn't go unnoticed by him as he leans forward narrowing his eyes infinitely. I try to ignore the glare he is sending toward me by averting my eyes. I'm sure everyone must be aware of his disliking to me. There is few moment of silence on the table as tension increases.

The waiter comes back with our order and I'm grateful to him for breaking the small piece of tension, everyone goes back to their conversion but I notice Slade is still looking between us as he asks king something and gets nothing in reply apart from a dismissing shrug because king is busy in glaring me. He doesn't touch anything to eat, he'd rather kill me with with eyes.

Why does he hate me so much?

What did I ever do to him?

At the moment I find my food more interesting than I've ever, I silently dig in.

Adam silently asks, "Isn't this best?"

I haven't really paid any attention but I nod hoping he'd get his answer.

By this point it feel impossible to eat with him throwing daggers at me, no matter how delicious the food is.

After few tortures minutes, I see a girl with orange hairs, of almost mine age or a bit older is making her way to our booth, looking confident like she is on a mission and she is looking hot and has sexy body. The guys are totally checking her out. She is wearing a remarkable short and tight dress showing more of her body than I could ever dream of.

She is giving me an icky feeling. I don't like her already.

Stop being like this!

She stops beside King and smiles, a seductive smile but he doesn't look up or acknowledge her, so she bends down, throwing her breast at his eyesight, rubbing his arm suggestively as she says something smoothing in his ear, only audible to him.

I don't why but it stings that he doesn't pull away from her. I have no right but It still doesn't stop to painful churn in my stomach.

You are pathetic!

I really am.

He still doesn't turn to her and continues to look at me. Searching my eyes when I finally raise my eyes to him and hold his. He then smirks, nodding to her as if he found whatever he was searching. Without breaking eye contact with me, he stands up and turn to leave, not acknowledging anyone else. The girl follows him behind but not before giving me a smug smile. Everyone silently watch them leave.

I find myself turning cold as I watch him leave. My whole inside feels a dreadful sensation.

Who is she?

Why is he leaving with her?

Not your business.

My unvoiced questions are answered by Adam, "That's Carina and he is probably going to fuck her brain out." Chuckling at the end he continues his food.

Sydney adds angrily, "She is such a slut. Continue guys I don't think he is coming back." Throwing her napkin back on the table.

My stomach sinks and my heart drops as the thoughts of him with her clouds my mind.

Suddenly I don't feel like eating anymore. I feel nausea creeping its way from my throat.

I'm getting sick.

I don't understand why his leaving is affecting me this way but it's such a disgusting feeling that I want it to stop. Even counting to ten doesn't help as panic continues to rise up.

I hate this nasty awful feeling.

I hate him for making me feel these.

I hate him.