😗sorry for any mistakes

Atlanta, GA

December 15th

Monday

"Momma, nooooo. I don't like oxtails" Ailani scrunched up her face, putting the car in park while on the phone with Vanessa.

Vanessa sucked her teeth "You never even had them before' girl! Always talm 'bout what you don't like" She fussed. Lani chuckled, turning the car off and letting the call transfer to her phone.

"I did once and they were nasty," She said, putting her phone on speaker and taking her seatbelt off. She looked ahead at the people walking in and some walking out with their kids. She was currently at the daycare to pick the girls up.

"You never had mine. I always put them on the grill, you'll see."

Lani chuckled, her mother's in-laws always tried to get her to try new things or things that she doesn't like but is made by them. They thought if she had it by them, then she would like it. That was the case but not for all foods.

"Ima send you the menu so you don't keep sayin' whatchu' like and don't. Bye, love you" Vanessa said, "Love you too" Lani smiled before hanging up.

Vanessa and Autumn always made her feel like their daughter. Not having a mom growing up affected her more than she realized. Having them showed her that and she was so grateful for them. They didn't treat her like just their son's girlfriend but as one of theirs.

Ailani got out of the car, zipping up her jacket all the way so her sports bra didn't show since she had just come from the gym. She walked ahead to the door "Thank you" She said politely when a man opened the door for her.

She walked inside, going to the front desk. Kimmy was standing there furrowing her eyebrows at her "Whatchu' doin' here?" She asked when Ailani was about to sign the girls out.

Lani chuckled "Whatchu' mean? I'm comin' to get the girls" She said, moving out the way so other people behind her could sign their children.

"I know but they aren't here. Matt came and got them like an hour or 2 ago" She looked back at the sign-out sheet and nodded "Yeah like an hour ago"

Lani looked at her funnily and looked over to see the sign-out sheet. "Oh, why didn't he tell me?" She mumbled and shook her head.

"Okay well I'll see you later" She tried to hug her but Kimmy quickly stepped back and shook her head no. "Miss girl you are sweaty" She curled her nose up and gave her a high five.

"I—" Lani started laughing "Bye girl" she chuckled, walking towards the door. "Byee" Kimmy smiled and waved her hand at her.

"Um excuse me" The same man that opened the door for her earlier stopped her. She looked up and raised her eyebrows "I jus' wanted to tell you you beautiful and ask are you single?" He smiled down at her.

She looked at him weirdly and then looked down to see what she had on. She thought she looked like a bum and sweaty "Thanks and no I'm not. Sorry" She said and walked past him to leave. She wasn't going to wait for him to respond, some men like to get disrespectful when you reject them.

She didn't have time to be fighting today.

_________________

"Mommy!" Sarayah squealed, running up to her as she came into the house through the garage door. "Hey, jelly bean!" She matched her energy, picking her up and kissing her cheeks.

Sarayah giggled "I missed you soo much. I almost fainted" She dramatically sighed, putting her hand on her head. Lani laughed at her dramatics. Last week the girls just stayed with Jabari the whole week since it was a lot going on for Lani and Matthias.

"I would hug me mommy but you're sweaty" Kennedi ran over, having the yikes expression on her face. Lani chuckled "Hello to you too Munchkin" She leaned down to kiss her forehead.

"Air hug?" Kennedi cheesed.

"Nope, outta of my face. Outta my face" She said, walking towards the kitchen where she heard the music playing and smelled food cooking.

"That's not fair!" Kennedi laughed, hugging her legs so she couldn't move anymore. "Oh nowww, you miss me?" She playfully mugged her, putting her hands on her hips.

"I did miss youuu but your sweaty and that's nasty" Kennedi frowned, and Lani just shook her head "Girl get offa' me so I can walk" She started tickling her. Ken instantly let go, trying to get away from her while laughing.

"You never play fair." She huffed. "You always wanna talk 'bout fair. What's not fair is yo' room not bein' clean" Lani resorted, with her brow raised.

"I'm going to clean it, I promise" She shook her head. "Mhm," Lani hummed and walked inside the kitchen seeing Rayah and Matthias fussing.

"But youuuu said I can try it once it's done" Rayah mugged him. He blankly looked at her "I jus' let you try the shrimp 10 minutes ago lil bit. You jus' bein' greedy" He fussed back.

"Nooo, you put different seasonings on it now. Let me get another one. I said please" She threw her hands up. "And I said no. Wait until dinner" He shrugged, putting the top on the pot and Lani just laughed at them. They always go back and forth over food.

"Matthias" She put her hand on her hips. "Sarayah," He said in the same tone as her and put his hands on his hips.

She sucked his teeth and walked away from him. "She be killin' me" He chuckled as Lani kissed his cheek "Hey," She said plainly.

"Wassup," He said, eyeing her. Things between them were still not it's best. She just came back home on Saturday and their interaction was more so plain since. You could tell they both hated it but they just never got time to talk about what happened and how they felt really.

"Why didn't you tell me you were picking them up today?" She asked. He furrowed his eyebrows "I told you this morning before I went to work" He said.

"You did?" She asked, confused. She doesn't even remember that but then again she was trying to go back to sleep after he woke her up by accident.

"Yep," He nodded.

"I'ma go take a shower," She said quickly when she saw he was about to say something and walked out of the kitchen.

_________________

Matthias watched Ailani move around their bedroom, putting things up and doing what seemed like everything she could instead of getting in bed with him.

He was at a strong point of thinking maybe she didn't want to be in this relationship anymore.

He thought the space they took from each other would've worked but instead, it just made her more distant from him. And he hated it. Everything just seemed off with them and he didn't know how to fix it.

More so, he didn't even know if she wanted to fix it.

He watched her close the last dresser and sighed. She turned the lights off before making her way to the bed. She got in on her side, with her back facing him and he just shook his head.

"Can we talk?" He spoke up, turning the tv down.

"About what?" She asked with her back still facing him. "About us Ailani" He turned her over to her back. She blinked her eyes at him.

"Look, I'm sorry 'bout what I said. I never meant fa' you to take it like that nor did I mean it how you took it. I was stressed and tired and took it out on you but neva' meant you to feel like you can't be vulnerable around me anymore." He said seriously. He knew how hard it was for her to express herself to him and he would never make her feel like she couldn't do it anymore.

"I know our communication has been bad too on my part. And I'm sorry fa' that too" He added.

"What happened? You always talk about us communicating but then you just stopped. Was it me? Do I annoy you too much or—"

"No" He immediately cut her off. "Hell no, you didn't do anything wrong, it was me." He tapped his chest.

"When we first met and started gettin' closer to one another, I always felt like I threw all my emotional baggage at you" He admitted causing her to frown. He felt like he always had problems and he always went to her and complained and complained. He thought she would get tired of him complaining about things in his life that he felt like he had to keep it in.

"That's not true" She started to sit up "You can't throw your emotional baggage at me if I always asked. If I always wanted you to tell me." She scooted over closer to him.

"You don't think I complain about the same thing over and over? You don't get tired of hearin' it?" He asked.

She shook her head "No. I want to kno' so you don't keep it all in and one just explodes. Just like you want me to." She expressed.

"I kno' I always complain about it, but why do you work so much? I understand it's important but it's like you overdo it." She said.

"Because I have to. I'm the only Architect, I'm the boss too so I have to worry 'bout everyone else. I knew what came wit' the job and askin' fa' help isn't an option. Makes me feel like I can't handle things." He admitted. "I watched my pops provide so that's what I have to do and not bein' able to provide makes me a failure" He continued.

"Downing myself in work keeps me less stressed from feeling like less of a father. I let her go over thea' wit' Cora, after times and times she cried not wanting to go over there. I didn't listen and she—she was almost taken advantage of because I didn't listen. My 4-year-old was so uncomfortable and I never listened. Providing makes me feel like I'm doin' something right by her and fixing what I did. Providing makes me feel like I'm doing right by you so you or Rayah don't have to ever worry about anything." He finished and sniffled.

"Bubba..." Lani mumbled before straddling his lap to make him look at her since he wasn't. "You can't keep putting that much pressure on yourself. You can't keep putting that blame on you either." She said softly while rubbing his cheek.

"You're always doin' right by her because you protect her every day and be the loving parent by her every day. What that sick ass nigga and bitch did is not your fault. It's theirs, not you. I get as a parent why you do it but it has to stop, you're killing yourself by doing that" She said. He shook his head and started to look down.

She grabbed his beard to make him look at her "I'm serious Matthias. I understand you want to provide the best life possible for us but if you're going to stress yourself out and become less active wit' us then we don't want it" She said seriously.

He shook his head again "You know what you have been through? Do you know how much heartache you have had? Still have it right now. You deserve the world and I wanna provide that for you" He said. He couldn't help but blame himself for the fire at her shop.

It was his crazy baby mama that did it but he felt like he dragged Lani into their problems. And that caused her something important that she put her life savings into.

"You shouldn't take the blame for what I went through. You didn't cause or do any of that stuff to me. What I deserve is the love you give me, not what you can provide for me. I can provide for myself, but the unconditional love you give me, I can't do that for myself"

"You gotta stop takin' on everybody's problems and putting the blame on you. You gotta stop overworking yourself because you're draining yourself. Your job is not a one-man job so stop trying to make it like it is. Please for your own mental health" She wiped the lonely tear from his eye.

"I'm sorry I made you feel second baby. I didn't mean to, I thought I was doin' the right thing by everybody." He sighed.

She leaned down to peck his lips softly "Just fix it and don't do it again. I understand now but I need you to think about yourself like you do everyone else" She softly smiled.

"Give me time and I promise Ima fix it. Ima earn your trust back" He said truthfully. He didn't know where he was going to start first but he was going to do it.

Or he was going to lose a lot if he didn't.

_________________

Atlanta, GA

December 16th

Tuesday

🎶Go on, get it

My shawty ain't scared,

My shawty ain't scared🎶

Marilyn Monroe by K CAMP played inside the kitchen as Matthias put the bacon in the oven.

When he stood up straight, closing the oven, he felt arms wrapped around his torso and a kiss on his back "Goodmorning" Ailani said softly, putting her head on his bare back.

He smiled and turned around. He wrapped his arms around her waist before leaning down to peck her lips and she smiled up at him "Goodmorning, you slept okay?" He asked, rubbing her back through the silk robe she had on.

She nodded, laying her head on his chest "I'm still sleepy tho" She chuckled.

"I can tell, the girls came to tell you bye before they went to school, they said you didn't even wake up" He chuckled. "It's the gym, I always get good sleep after." She said as they subtly rocked side to side.

He started fake sniffing "So you don't get good sleep wit' me? I'm hurt," He said.

She started laughing and looked up at him "Yeah when you ain' tryna put me inna choke hold" She poked his side. He busted out laughing "I do not be tryna put you inna a choke hold"

"Yes, you do! I swear you be actin' like someone gonna come and take me. Big ass arm always makin' sure i'on go nowhere. Can't even switch positions" She shook her head and he laughed even harder.

He never even noticed he did that. They always slept in two positions, either she was in a chokehold by him or she slept directly on top of him.

"Whatchu doin' here tho?" She asked, putting her chin on his chest and looking up at him. "I took the next two days off." He informed her, leaning down to repeatedly peck her lips. Something he missed very much.

"Really?" She furrowed her eyebrows, and he nodded. Their talk last night was the last time he was going to make her feel second to his job. And the last time he wasn't going to take his mental health into consideration. The whole time they didn't talk and she wasn't home was an eye-opener for him.

He was determined to fix it all.

"What have you planned for today?" He asked. She sighed "Nothing. I was supposed ta' got look at a building with Lyric but she's not feeling well. Prolly ship off some packages" She shrugged.

"I'm sorry mama," He said, she just stayed at home now or ran small errands around the house, took care of the house when he knew she wanted to be back at work. She still had her cosmetic line but it wasn't the same as going to work every morning.

She shook her head "It's not your fault. It's yo' baby mama's. I'on wanna think 'bout it right now tho" She said, letting go of him and tapping his arms so he could move them.

He watched her going inside the refrigerator, he could tell something was bothering her but won't speak on it. He understood why she wouldn't speak to him about it at the moment but he hated not knowing what was going through her mind. She can hide her emotions very well if she honestly wanted.

"Talk ta' me," He said softly, turning the music down and walking over to the table to sit next to her. She stared at him blankly causing him to sigh. "I kno' what I said and I know how I made you feel but it's okay ta' talk ta' me baby" He stressed.

"I just feel bad. My best friend is due in like 2 or 3 months and is out of a job." She started opening her water bottle. "Kei not gonna let ha' struggle. You kno' that especially wit' them living together" He said.

"I kno' but I also know Lyric is goin' ta' want to depend on him all the time. And my other employees, some of them have kids and bills ta' pay. Christmas is next week and as an Esthetician, it's not as easy to find another good working place." She explained. "Then here I am, livin' comfortably' why they might have to struggle '' She added.

"If you want, we can raise money fa' them. I little something to get them by until you and Lyric find another building" He suggested. "Don't you still have ta' give them their final checks? I can give you money to add to it"

She shook her head no "That's your money Bubba" She tried to dismiss that.

He looked at her funny "My money is your money. Whatchu' you mean?" He asked.

"We aren't married sirr, that's not true" She chuckled. "Yet. But we can go to the court house right now and— Sirrr" She cut him off and busted out laughing.

"You laughin' and I'm foreal" He chuckled. "But let me help you. I'on wanna see nobody struggle either or no family's on the street because I didn't choose wisely on who I had a kid with" He said seriously. Matthias was a Millionaire, if he had a way to help those in need with his money, he wanted to do it.

"I'on kno' bubba" She twisted her lips to the side.

"Just think about it." He shrugged before getting up to go check on the bacon.

___________________________________

HEEEEEEYYYYYYY

Thoughts or opinions?

Can y'all start commenting...... they the best part of writing and I be thinking y'all don't like the book😭

Should Lani let Matt give her the money ?

570 votes for an update!!!

BYEEEE UNTIL MY NEXT UPDATEEE🦋