I would say pregnancy gets better over time, but it has got progressively worse for me. The morning sickness is not as bad, but it hasn't completely gone away. Also, my blood pressure continues to fluctuate. My doctor told me to monitor my blood pressure often and go to the hospital if it gets too high. But, I've been okay as of lately.

Today, I have class and therapy. Then after, I'm gonna go see Dashawn. He's been busy as usual so he told me to come by the club.

I am getting so big it's weird. I won't find out the sex of the baby until my next appointment which is next week. But, that's even if I want to know. Dashawn said it's up to me, but I don't mind waiting. I'm in no rush to know. It won't matter anyway, boy or girl. I think Dashawn wants a boy though. Don't all men want boys?

I took a shower and brushed my teeth, which took longer then I wanted. I couldn't stop from gagging on the smell of the toothpaste. I wore a big t-shirt as always and some sweatpants since it was getting cold outside. I ate a plain bagel for breakfast and drank a bunch of water and grabbed two body armor drinks before stuffing them in my bag. Dashawn would kill me if he knew how heavy my bag was.

When I made it on campus, I parked in front of the building of my first class and got out. I mentally prepared myself for the long day.

.....

"Asha," Mac nodded in my direction as he opened the back door for me.

"Hey Mac," I smiled in his direction. Mac was one of Dashawn's security guards for the strip club. Mac and I often talked about deep shit like his wife and kids. Dashawn pay good, so Mac has always stuck around. He led me to Dashawn's office. I opened the door and looked around. Of course, Dashawn was no where to be found. I rolled my eyes.

"I'll let D know you're here."

I plopped down on the couch and removed my shoes. My feet were so sore. I sat with my legs crossed and pulled out my phone. I scrolled through my notes which had my long list of assignments on it. I started going through everything and making a plan. About forty-five minutes went by when the door opened. Dashawn strolled in, eyes searching around the room until he spotted me.

"I told you to call before you came," he said walking over to me.

"I forgot," I shrugged. "You knew I was coming though."

"I forgot," he teased back.

"You hungry?"

I nodded and he held out a bag of Chinese food. I clapped my hands in excitement, my mood instantly changing. "Yo bipolar ass," he laughed. I pulled out everything and placed the food on the table in front of me to decide what I wanted to eat first. I picked a small box of fried rice and some spring rolls. Dashawn sat next time to me and watched me as I ate.

"Why you staring at me so hard," I said with a mouth full of food.

"I can't look at you now?"

"No," I frowned.

"It makes me uncomfortable," I cocked my head to the side in annoyance. Dashawn laughed, making my frown deepen.

"My son got you acting up." He caressed my stomach and I let him.

"I bet it's a girl," I mumbled.

"Naw, it ain't."

"How do you know?" I asked.

"Cuz I do. How much you wanna bet," he said pulling out a wad of cash. I rolled my eyes.

I thought for a second before responding, "How about your Ghost?"

"My white Royce?" He reiterated.

"Yes sir," I said swallowing my food and reaching in my bag for a body armor.

"And what you gone give me if I win?"

"A baby," I laughed.

"Whatchu mean a baby? I'm gone get a baby regardless."

"Fine, then you get to keep your Rolls Royce. If it's a girl that means I win and I get your car. If you win, you get to keep your car. Is that fair?"

"Mmhmm," he smirked down at me.

"Ok cool," I said bouncing in my seat. Dashawn stood and walked to the other end of the room and lit a blunt.

"You can have whatever you want. Yo ass don't need to make bets."

"You started it. Plus, there ain't nothing wrong with some healthy competition."

Honestly, I don't really care to have his Royce, but he's always so sure of himself and so cocky. He's been saying that it's a boy for a while now and I have a gut feeling that it's not. I will not pass up the opportunity to wipe that smirk off of his face and take his car at the same time. He got enough cars as it is anyway.

I shimmied off of the couch and placed the empty containers on the table. I was stuffed.

"I have to pee. I'll be back." I didn't wait for his response and just left. I made it to the bathroom. There was only three stalls but luckily no one was in any of them. I placed down some tissue because squatting just wasn't an option anymore. When I was done, I washed my hands. Just as I was grabbing a paper towel, someone came in.

"Asha?" I looked up seeing a half naked Penny

"Oh, hey Penny."

"Look at you! You are glowing."

"Oh, uh. Thank you."

"Can I touch your stomach?" I nodded and she gently placed her hands on my belly. I watched her reaction closely. Her eyes lit up similar to how Dashawn's eyes do, but not nearly as intense. I haven't seen Penny since the beginning of my pregnancy when I wasn't showing at all. This must be a shock to her, especially since I don't really try to hide my pregnancy anymore. I still wear baggy clothes so that it doesn't draw a lot of attention, but I'm not hiding. I don't care who sees my belly now, especially after how Cairo reacted. I constantly think about the way he looked at me. I'd rather for people to just know then for me to go out of my way to hide it. If I were just honest to begin with, maybe Cairo would have understood. Maybe if I had spent my time trying to explain everything to him instead of being secretive about it, he wouldn't have gotten the wrong idea. Maybe he felt betrayed. Shit, I don't know. It still fucks me up when I think about. I think he blocked me too because every time I try to call him his phone goes straight to voicemail.

"Whatchu doing here?" Penny asked.

"Just visiting," I shrugged.

"You just got here? It's still early," I questioned.

"Yea girl. I was comin to try on my new outfits for later tonight. You like this one?" She asked as she stood back and did a few spins. I looked at her body-she had on a blue Diamond encrusted triangle top that had her breasts sitting up all nice and perky. Her thong left absolutely nothing to the imagination. It was blue also, but had small diamonds for straps. Her body was toned and looked really good.

"You look good," I said.

"I know, but does it make you wanna fuck me," she said bending over and shaking her ass. I smiled and looked away. Her bold ass. She will take any opportunity to try and tease me and make me uncomfortable.

"If I were a dude, yes." She clapped her hands and did a lil happy dance. This girl here. Every time I see her she always manages to put a smile on my face even if it's an uncomfortable one.

"Yo goofy ass," I shook my head.

"Girl, you know I would fuck you, pregnant and all."

"Okay, now I'm finna go." Penny burst out laughing.

"I'm just playing," she continued to laugh. I smiled along with her as I left the restroom.

"Have a good night Penny."

"You too Asha."

I made my way back to Dashawn's office. When I opened the door, my smile completely faded. The fuck was this! I pushed the door open the rest of the way making it slam against the wall. One of them bitches that I don't like jumped in her spot laid out on Dashawn's desk playing with her pussy all out in the open.

"Fuck," Dashawn cursed and pulled his dick from out of her throat. I wanted to gag.

I am not that much of a confrontational person, but just the sight of him touching on another female and seeing her suck on his dick had my blood about ready to boil over. I stormed over to grab my stuff. I threw the rest of the unopened food back into the takeout bag because I was taking that shit too.

"Get the fuck out," he said to her.

"No, I'll get out," I scoffed walking to the door.

"Asha, sit yo ass down," he sneered at me.

"You don't run me!" I dismissed him over my shoulder and continued out of the room. I walked as fast as I could. I got to the back door and threw it open. Mac was already on alert.

"Asha slow down. Where you going in such a hurry?"

"Away from his ass." Mac followed behind me as I threw my stuff in my car.

"You shouldn't drive angry like this. At least let me find someone to take you home."

"I don't give a fuck. I'm not staying here any longer."

"What happened?" He sounded concerned.

I scrunched my nose up, "I was only gone for like five minutes. In that time, he had some naked bitch sprawled out on the table sucking his dick," I gagged.

"Asha!!"

I hopped in the car and started it up.

"Mac, stop her damn!" Before Mac could do anything, I sped off. I know I shouldn't be mad, but I am. When I was long gone and far down the road, my phone wouldn't stop ringing. So, I turned it off. That will fix him.

"Shit," I grabbed my stomach when I felt a sharp pain. Another one hit and I had to pull over. When I got the chance, I pulled over on a one way street and put the car in park. I palmed my stomach and tried to control my breathing the same way my doctor taught me in case of a panic attack.

"I bet I'm stressing you out," I said continuing to palm my stomach. I rested my head against the steering wheel and took more deep breaths. Damn, I wish I could go back on my promise right about now.

When I was feeling okay, I drove home.

When I made it to the house, I quickly went in and locked all of the locks including the chain. I also put the security bar under the door. I just wanted to be alone to collect my thoughts and get my emotions in check. I don't act like this. I am not confrontational and I do not care for drama, but drama seems to follow me where ever I go, and this baby is not helping at all.

I need to stop letting people affect my mood.