《The Love Game》An Interesting Mind
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I hold Ravina close against my chest as we stand here in silence.
I know the conversation isn’t done. There are still things I need to say, still things she needs to hear.
I release her somehow and then hold my breath for what I’m about to say next.
“Ravina, I gotta tell you something.”
“Oh?”
Here goes nothing…
“When I get back to Korea, back home, I’m going to be working part time at my family’s company. It was the deal I had to make with them.” I tell her.
She nods. “Okay, well that will be ok right?”
I smile. “Yeah it will be. But, I wanted to explain something else.”
I draw in a deep breath.
“I figured out what I want to do. Or at least try,” I shrug.
Ravina waits.
“Part time working with my family, part time going to school. I’m going to try and train to be a teacher. For little kids.”
It’s not the first time I’ve said it out loud. I told my parents and Emma last night. That was an interesting conversation…
Ravina’s eyes widen.
I smile. “I realized that I haven’t really grown up like everyone else. I’m not as mature as you, or even James and Lee. I'm still remembering my past, my childhood. Still wanting to go back to it. I think that maybe I can enjoy doing this. Teaching children. I don’t know what exactly, but it’ll definitely be an adventure.”
This feels like the right path. I only wish it didn’t involve me being across the globe from Ravina.
She shakes her head, and when her eyes meet mine again there are tears in them.
I frown. “What is it?”
“I’m just so proud of you.” She says suddenly.
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Woah, what?
“What do you mean?”
Rav laughs. “I knew you could do it.” She blinks tears from her eyes.
God I love this girl. I love her compassion, her understanding. Her trust in me.
“You told me so,” I smile at her.
She nods matter of factly.
“Yes I did,” she wipes the tears from her eyes. “I just wish you could stay with me while you start your life.”
My heart tightens. Actual physical pain-
“I do too Ravina, more than you know. But I need to see if this will work. I owe it to myself. I realise how selfish that sounds-”
She puts her finger to my mouth softly.
“No. No…” She says. “Not selfish, brave. I love you Theodore Kim, and I am beyond excited for you.”
Only Ravina could make me cry with words like that. She wipes my tears away with her thumbs and then stands up on her toes to kiss me.
Her lips are soft.
I feel my eyes close, and her mouth parting as she gasps. Hear her racing heartbeat, or I suppose that could be me…
I return her kiss, wishing it could be even close to enough to showing her what she means to me. What she’s brought to my life, and what I love her for. Nothing ever will be enough, but I’ll give it my best shot.
Somewhere deep in my mind, flickers and flashes of a memory appear. It’s not something I remember per se, but something I think my body does. The heat of her, the softness. Ravina and I, together in every way-
The moments when I truly feel right.
“When do you leave?” She asks me suddenly, breaking away.
Her voice sounds painful. Like she’s on the verge of tears again.
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I swallow. “Three weeks.”
She holds her breath. “And how long will you be gone?”
“A while.”
“How long… ” she repeats.
“You might be finished with college by the time I’m back.” I manage to tell her.
Ravina’s eyes go wide.
Suddenly, she throws her and around me, knocking me back as I just barely catch her.
“Shh, it’s okay.” I tell her, running my fingers through her hair.
“I’m going to miss you so fucking much.” She sniffs.
“You can visit me anytime you want, and I’ll come back when I can.”
“Visit? Really!” She says, pulling away.
“You don’t want to?”
She smiles. “No, I do. I’d love to!”
I grin. “Good,”
Ravina swallows, then wipes her tears away again…
I should not make her cry so much.
“Wanna dance?” I ask, gesturing at the building.
She smiles. “No.”
I raise an eyebrow at her. “No?”
Her hand reaches up and she gently drags her thumb across my bottom lip. It comes away red. Oh. Lipstick.
“No.” She giggles.
“Then what should we do?”
My heart races as I tick through the possibilities, but Ravina just smiles at me and softly says; “Truth or dare.”
I laugh. “Train tracks?” I say, and she nods.
“Come along then,” I take her hand and steer her toward the car.
Ravina hops in and I turn the heater on for her.
“Music preference?” I ask her as I turn the ignition on.
Ravina smirks at me. I put our song on and start to drive, listening to Ravina as she hums softly… it’s beyond soothing. I glance over at her a few minutes later and she’s redoing her lipstick silently. She catches me staring-
“Eyes on the road sir,” she blushes.
I bow my head. “Yes ma’am!”
She giggles. I adore that sound…
“I wouldn’t have to put more on,” she says, talking about her lips. “If you hadn’t taken most of it off.”
I blink in surprise and then glance over at her. She looks pleased with herself.
“Is it still on me?” I ask.
“A little. Looks good.”
I laugh. “So. Truth or dare?” I ask, turning onto the main road.
“Truth.”
I pause, thinking…
“How was your graduation?”
Ravina snorts. “I got locked in the bathroom-”
“What! Really?”
“Not for all of it. I just missed the beginning, but yeah it was amazing.”
I bite my lip so I don’t start laughing. “My turn?” I say, highly amused.
She nods. “Pick your poison Theodore,”
I glare at her and she gives me a wide grin.
“Okay. Truth.”
She has her question ready. “Who was your first kiss?”
I can’t help but laugh. The distinct note of jealousy is hard to miss with Ravina…
“Why?” I grin. “So you can know who to put a hex on?”
“You know me so well.”
Shaking my head, I tell her. Ravina’s eyes narrow and I stare at her in awe.
“You’re so cute when you’re mad at me,” I tease her.
She just pouts.
“Why’d you ask if you didn’t want to know?”
She shrugs. “Maybe I am a masochist… ”
I roll my eyes. “You have an interesting mind, Ravina. Let’s leave it at that.”
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