I am.The absolute. worst fighter ever.

Listen, I don't care what movie you've seen. I don't give a crap what video game, what book, what blasphemous legend you've heard. Be it a demigod or a hanyou, super soldier, or a damn race of Warrior bred, alien super monkeys with golden hair, training is HARD.

First off and foremost? muscle memory. now i may be a drop of primordial existence but I don't think anything would have prepared me for the amount of broken bones I was gifted by my new trainer, the unconquerable and mighty Lord of shattered body parts. Rome was a taskmaster worthy of the hebrew brick pits. She was fast, sure, but I could do that footwork easy. But my body even now is mortal. Forcing blood to flow and bioelectric current to pass through me with less resistance may help me out pace her,however i was shredding my muscles. but it was compared to her strength. She was unparalleled. And at her base level of training she had shattered my cheekbone, broke my neck, snapped my collarbone, and had my flimsy tin foil butt skipping all across the warehouse Jolie had picked out for our training. She was watching from across the room sitting on a short concrete wall.at first, well, she was panicking. We had just broken the news to her that I'm not exactly human. She actually started screaming some Latin at me she later said some people called the Winchesters had told her would push demons to hell. It had been confusing, since, y'know, demons don't adhere to saying “get out” in another language very well. Typically they try to rip your skin off before you can even say hi.

Regardless she had a totally mood change when I told her I could manipulate atoms and things of that nature, she pulled out a small baggie of green plant matter and asked could I find a specific compound in it, then transmute the whole gram of it just to the pure compound. I handed her back the bag after the change, and she immediately grabbed a blown piece of glass, snatched Rome by the hand, and they disappeared for the better part of an hour. At some point they came back, smiling and giggling, and demanded we go somewhere to combat train me.

Neither of them had stopped giggling even as Rome redecorated everything in the room with my face. Jolie had resigned to watching videos on her phones, occasionally looking up in time to cheer happily as I would successfully dodge or land a hit.she also would just as quickly look down and ignore the godless sounds of me splattering all over the floor when Rome would grin from ear to ear and SHATTER the concrete floor just stepping into me. She never once did more than shoulder check me, or practically walk my way with an outstretched arm and open palm. The pressure of her movement?thunderclaps.and her touches bolts of lightning, pure immolating agony.

I had just launched myself up off the ground by gripping the floor and throwing myself forward at her, tearing my palms and shredding my muscles as I spiralled at her mid air, stealing a move from my favorite anime. As cool as I looked, It met zero success. She spun on her left foot and swing her right in an upward sweep, connecting with my ribs so hard I felt the blood in my side crystallize and my bones turn to jelly.but before I could fly into the roof i grappled her thigh,tendons in my right hand popping.it was the first time her gaze faltered as we both were lifted off the floor. I leaned my weight backwards, causing her knee to buckle and her weight to shift my way. She growled, sounding bestial as she shot a hand forward, knifing my throat with her fingers closed together. both jugulars exploded instantly out the sides of my neck,my trachea a splintered mess and me left almost decapitated, but at this point she had all but rendered my nerves a tingling sensation. It's not that I couldn't feel pain, it's just, well, i had been at a 10 for the past 3 hours. The shock kinda wore off when my nose had too regrow after pushing all the way to my face from my pituitary gland.

Needless to say I smiled, and punched that fangy bitch in the mouth. We spun backwards over her head,making 6 full rotations before we slammed into the ground.the best thing was the look on her face as her head drove into the ground, breaking my fingers and arm up to the shoulder. Oh the pain was extravagant, because I knew she felt way worse.

“payback for the eardrums, hickey queen.”I chuckled and layed back. Shuddering as my arm healed. I could hear the squelch of Rome’s brain unscrambling.after a second or two Jolie made it over to us and sat next to me.she still seemed spacey,but she looked me over.

“so,did you get her?”

I nodded in reply. Moaning in discomfort. Rome shifted a bit, and grunted as bones shifted back into place, rubbing her neck and wincing as her neck cracked and popped.after a few minutes she dropped her arm and just layed there unbreathing as I sat up to evaluate my arm and the damage around us.

“ugh,”Rome grumbled, aggravated.”you totally killed my buzz man.good shot though, I was surprised to say the least..where'd you get that move? It was kinda clunky so I could tell it was patched togeth-”

Jolie started giggling, I guess a knew wave hit her cause all she exclaimed was,”It's just her ninja way! Believe it!” before practically falling to the floor giggling about foxes and toad sages. Rome and i consecutively rolled our eyes,hers just exasperated, mine definitely trollish with my trademark smirk. “You mad Rome?” I'm practically beaming as she glowers at me and shoved me away from her with more human strength.

“Shut up before I drink that sexy nerd next to you like a Capri-Sun, been a while since I had brunette.” Rome's eyes slid over Jolie nonchalantly and locked on mine. “You did ok though.for your first day i would say you'll be ready for most opponents within the month. I'll move some things here, I want you here,midnight, and least 5 times a week.you don't show up, I start sending you situations you have to fight your way out of,” she rose and waved us off,her body slowly shifting to black. “I have to chat with some peers of mine now. So you two go off and talk the rest of this out. I'm sure Jo still has questions and you want to escape another beating.she then disappeared.flatly vanished. Leaving me and the giggling Jolie alone. I turn my head and look at her,and smile.

“Hey, Let's watch some anime at your place and see if I can learn and ghoul moves!”

“OH MY GOD YES” she was kicking her feet and laughing hysterically, but suddenly, stopped. She sat straight up and looked at me with wide eyes,like an idea occurred to her.

“holy ships,I STILL HAVE AN OUNCE AT HOME!!!” Man, I don't know what that meant but she sure seemed excited