I leaped out of bed and threw off my blue pajamas. I slipped a long sleeve over my head along with some long joggers.

I swung open the door and scanned my room. The bed was tucked and every loose article of clothing was packed tightly into the dresser.

I clicked my tongue in satisfaction and switched the lights off before closing the door behind me. I ran down the stairs and turned the corner into the dining room.

“Kayla, how many times do I have to tell you. Stop running!”

Mother yelled, standing beside Alice who was already sitting down with her back towards me.

Alice still dressed in her green pajamas I gave for her to wear with unruly hair. It wasn’t messy to the point of being unsightly but bedhead with the back and top all ruffled up.

Untouched pancakes and eggs laid on the plate before her, holding her fork at the ready. A glass of orange juice just beside it filled to the brim waiting to be savored.

Pancakes and eggs with orange juice? What is this, some sort of sitcom?

The shaking of her hand was obvious. Mother mouthed to me and tilted her head to Alice below her, telling me to cheer her up.

Aren’t you the kid expert, mother? Come back and fulfill your duties! How do I make a child happy! I’m about to tear up as well.

I slid into the seat across from Alice and gave her a smile from cheek to cheek.

Her eyes were red and swollen. Lips quivering and nose on the brink of letting out a green waterfall. She was staring blankly into her plate before parting her lips.

“KK...” Alice shivered.

“Yes?”

“I’m sorry. I’m truly and utterly sorry. I wasn’t thinking straight.”

Alice spoke slow, whimpering with each syllable. I clutched at her hand that rested on the table.

“Let’s not dwell on it. For now let’s just eat breakfast.” I said, restraining back my own tears.

I don’t want to see Alice in any more pain. She already witnessed the death of her family, twice in one life.

I picked up the utensils and dug into my own serving of the same breakfast.

The fluffy cloud that is a pancake with the pillow texture of the sunny-side up eggs were blissful. Complimenting this with a hearty glass of orange juice just completed the full set for a well made breakfast.

Thank you mother! If this was the last meal I ate, I would have died a peaceful death with no regrets!

I could see Alice tilt her head up from the corner of my eye. Blinking once, no twice, no four times, in rapid succession.

“How can you just sit here and eat breakfast?”

“How? Well simple, just stab one and chew it in your mouth.”

“KK, you kno-“

“Come on, finish up quick. We have somewhere to be today.”

Before she could let out another word, I got up from the table and raced up the steps. I paused at the top, contemplating where the best place to go would be.

Beach? No, too dirty. Concert? No, too crowded. Umm, a romantic candle-lit dinner?

I snapped my fingers and clicked my tongue when I finally came to a decision. I ran into my closet, pulling off a set of clothes before rushing into the bathroom. A few minutes passed when I heard footsteps ascending the stairs and shutting the door to my bedroom.

Entering inside my room, I was now dressed in a black gradient skirt and a cotton pink sweater with the hair clips to top it all off. I twirled in front of the mirror for a bit then turned to see Alice who was sitting on the bed.

She was dressed in her own outing clothes, a loose white shirt partnered with bright blue jeans overlaid with a plaid cardigan at the waist. Her long hair put up into a high ponytail to complete the look. It may look simple but she made it look like a model on her day-off. Beauty really is cruel!

“I got dressed like you said.” Alice said, fidgeting with her two index fingers.

“Perfect. Just perfect. Let’s go!”

I let out a wide smile and grasped her slim wrist with my hand. I tugged her to the doorway and shut the door behind me before running down the stairs.

“Don’t come back too late girls!”

“Yeah, yeah!”

We reached the end of steps and I dropped Alice’s hand in which she responded with a lost puppy look.

“Wait here for a moment.”

I sprinted up the stairs again and burst through the door mom was in. She laid sitting up from the bed in her reading glasses, holding a withered black book with white accents on the cover.

She didn’t even react fast enough to shift over before I ran up to her and embraced her tight with my arms around her neck.

“What’s come over you Kayla?”

“I just love you, so very much.”

She patted me softly on the back in strokes.

“I love you too, dear. Now go, Alice is waiting for you.”

I let up my embrace and twirled back towards the door without making eye contact with her. I don’t think I could handle it. With a hidden smile I ran back out the door and down the stairs to join hands with Alice once more.

I slipped on white sneakers and tugged Alice down the steps of my house and down the street. We turned the corner onto the main street and grabbed onto a slow moving open bus by the white handles. I didn’t even mind standing from the side of the bus, the breeze hit me face gently with the unexpected smell of roses.

Alice never loosened her hold with me the whole ride from hopping on, to hopping off thirty minutes later at our destination. The tall brown gates stood proud with a short line at the ticket booth beside it.

“The amusement park? Why here?”

“Well, it was either this or a candle dinner, which would you rather have?”

“Candle dinner.”

I gave a blank stare to the romantic in front of me. I cleared my throat before turning around and tugging her along to get our stamps.

“Well, this will just have to do.”

I could feel my face heating up. I only hope that my ears didn’t share the same shade of red.

We made it through the line and entered inside of the park. Lined up on the sides were booths of balloon darts, ring toss, shooting range, and other types of minigames. The farther we skipped in hand, I could feel Alice loosening up a bit, a smile creeping on her face even if she didn’t realize it.

Running from stall to stall, we bought crepes as a snack and laughed our way to the basketball minigame.

“You go first, Alice.”

“I don’t know.”

“Oh come on, don’t tell me the star of the track team isn’t good at sports.”

That must have fired her up, she slapped her face with both hands and walked onto the court. She picked up a ball from the rack and started to dribble.

“On my mark. Get set. Go!”

The employee blew his whistle and Alice shot out her first ball of eight.

A miss, hitting the rim and bouncing away. The second shot whizzed through the air, not even hitting the backboard. The three shots after were just as the first, each time bouncing right back towards her.

“Come on, Alice!”

“It’s not like you could do any better.”

“Is that a challenge miss track captain?”

She flaunted the hems of her shirt as I walked to where she stood.

“If I make all three you have to buy us crepes.”

“Deal, milady.” Alice said, smirking while bouncing the ball to me.

I prodded the basketball in my hand, feeling the pressure with both my hands. I walked past Alice and lined up with the pole.

Why was this so intense? It’s just shooting a ball. It’s not like I never shot a ball before… Ok I haven’t in the last five years but Alice didn’t know that.

The sweat nested in my brow as I bent my arms in the ready position. The heat of the sun peeking just in the corner of my eye. The sensation surging through my past lives.

“Just shoot the bloody ball, KK!”

“Shut up!”

I shot the first ball and it went in.

It’s a miracle.

I gave a smug look at Alice behind me and got another ball ready for lift-off. I shot again, another goal.

The heavens are smiling upon me this day! No longer and I the damned!

Confidently picking up the last ball from the rack, I twirled before letting go of the final shot. I could hear the bounces on the ground and the rattling of the fence when the ball made it no where close to the basket.

I should not have gotten so cocky. Who did I think I was? The next NBA star player of the century?

Slow clapping started behind me which somehow perked my irritation to a higher degree.

“Bravo, KK. You managed to impress me and think you a fool at the same time. A feat that surely won’t go unnoticed.” Alice laughed, putting one hand on my shoulder and giving me a thumbs up.

“Two is still greater than the zero you achieved.” I said, giving her a thumbs up of my own.

“No one asked for your sass!”

“And no one asked for your inferiority complex!”

We both stared at each other and paused. A moment of silence between us.

“Pfft. You are so stupid sometimes.” Alice burst out laughing, grabbing at her stomach.

“Hey, sometimes being stupid is better than not being able to learn. Now come on.”

I outstretched my arm with my hand open. Alice continued her laughing and still joined hands with me. We thanked the employee and walked back out into the crowds.

We passed by a family who all had the same dessert in their hands with different toppings, Blueberry, strawberry, and cinnamon on top of whip cream. Alice and I looked at each other before sprinting behind us towards the crepe stand.

“Strawberry.”

“Blueberry is way better.” I said, taking a bite out of the dessert in my hand.

“Blueberries are umm too bitter. Or is it sweet? Either way, it's too strong.”

Alice bit into her own strawberry crepe, smearing cream on the corner of her mouth.

“Ok! I have conceded to your whims, now will you tell me why we’re here?”

I stomped my foot on the ground and held my place.

“Oh my dear, Alice, there is still much more we have to get through. Shall we continue?”

I tugged on her loose sleeve and wrapped around the food stalls. Then he came in sight. The horses went around in circles, bringing smiles upon the impressionable children.

“Are we seriously going on a carousel? We aren’t five you know.” Alice looked at me with her eyes scanning around.

Of course she would be embarrassed, but what kind of princess doesn’t get to ride a horse? May it be a real one that trots around a field or one that goes around in circles in one spot, all the same, mhm.

I made my move first, running to the empty line. Alice followed in tow, dragging her feet with sunken shoulders. She really was too self-conscious. I brought out my phone and pulled her in for a candid picture.

“Stop that! I don’t want to display our day on top of plastic horses. I have some pride you know.”

When the music ended and the kids swarmed off, we hopped into the red and golden bench that looked as if it was being pulled by the horses. I would’ve much rather ridden the horse instead but I can settle with just this.

The music started and we moved in turn. The slight wind brushing through our smiles. I look over to see Alice with her hair strands blowing into her face. It was like a dream. At least that’s what I imagined, I haven’t been able to dream in a long time.

The world spun around us. Like a pastel painting that never quite had a direction except for the colorful background. Everything was blurred. We were blurred.

No one understands what a carousel really is. It’s not just a children’s ride of fake horses, no. It was something more...grand. Hear me out. Time moves fast, and we are stuck in place. By the hour the minute no, the second! Yes, it’s something more astonishing than just a children’s ride.

The spinning increased gradually. The crowds around us blurred and their chatter distorted. My hands were trembling. My lips are quivering. My ears pounding with the blaring beats of my heart.

Was that humming? I swear I heard humming.I think I’m feeling a great deal of motion sickness. I can’t breathe.

A tugging sensation brought air back into my lungs, I turned to my left to face Alice smiling at me.

“KK, when this is all over…”

When she let go of my sleeve it returned back to that fuzzy sensation. I couldn’t hear her.

What did she say?

“What was that last part?”

“It’s nothing. Just a stupid girl’s request. Come on, the ride is about to end.”

Alice walked out and I could see her hand move up to your face. Tilting the hat slightly lower to shadow her eyes.

I stepped off the carousel to follow her, but the distortion was getting louder. I grabbed my head that felt like it was being pressured from every side. A harsh whisper echoed in my head.

And in the end, it’s a damned tragedy.

“KK, are you alright?”

Alice clutched my shoulder. In that moment, the throbbing went away. I latched onto her arm with a tight embrace.

“Don’t you dare leave my side.”

“What if we need to use the restroom?”

“Then our bond will just be getting drastically closer than before.”

Alice gave me a weird look as if I was some pervert named Grim from that reality tv show. I’m not a pervert! Alice I am innocent and the embodiment of innocence!

“Where to next?” Alice asked, trying to loosen from my embrace.

“How about...over there!”

I pointed to the tall ferris wheel at the far end of the park. It wasn’t the tallent, but it will accomplish just about the same. We weaved through the crowds over the cotton candy littered floor. The crowds were thinning out as the sky painted a fiery orange color that was the sunset.

“Just the two of us.” I said to the employee holding the line.

She beckoned us in by unlatching the rope and opening the glass door to the cart. There was no one else behind us, along with no one else riding in the other cars. Everything was just...empty.

We fastened ourselves in, sitting across from each other. I noticed Alice’s hair that has gotten more unruly like she has just woken up from a deep slumber and brushed through her head a few times. I leaned forward and patted down the strands that were standing up or sticking a little too much on the side.

“Aren’t you afraid of heights?” Alice asked, her own hands trembling.

“If we were afraid to do things we were scared off, I would have stopped being friends with you a long time ago,” I said with a smug look, waving my hand in front of her.

“And do you regret it? Knowing someone so selfish.”

“Selfish?”

“Quit the charades! You die today and it’s no one’s fault but mine. How long until you address this terrifying fact? I’m going insane and you sit there calm with your innocent unnerving smile.”

“Alice I-”

“Just say it! How much you hate me and how much I despise you. I know it’s what you’re thinking.”

I sat there quietly, staring at the waterfall sprinkling down her eyes.

“KK, maybe you would have been better off if i just died along with everyone else.”

“Alice come on, that isn’t true.”

“But that’s not entirely false, right? Think about it. No longer having to tend to the whims of your broken childhood friend.”

The ride began to move. We reached the top in silence with only Alice’s whimpers lingering on the hushed wind. Should I comfort her? I didn”t want our last day in this world to be sorrow filled one.

“I will say this once, Alice, so listen carefully.”

She nodded, straightening her posture and resting both hands on her jeans.

“You are stupid.”

“And you’re an idiot!”

“I’m not done. You are so stupid that you thought carrying your burdens alone was the right thing to do. Have you ever once thought about telling me? How, this would make me feel?”

“Of cour-”

“Have you never realized just how much I love you? Through all our days, strung along to your tone-deaf tune. I’m not interested in the things I’m not fond of, Alice. And you’ve had my attention from the moment you bumped into me. Are you telling me I never had yours?”

I stared unflinchingly into her restless eyes. I know she scanned the inside of the cart several fold. But we were too high up for her to run away now.

I looked to my left, outside the glass door. The sun slunked behind the hills, the reddish orange being replaced by the following darkness. The cart began to shake, rattling the metal clanks that held us.

Down below were living statues, people frozen mid-action. I looked over at Alice, visibly panting heavily. Was it because of the earthquake? Or because of what I said.

Dark clouds loomed over the hills, striking down flashes of light with the roars echoing in the sky. I unbuckled my belt and leaped over onto Alice’s seat, embracing her shoulder as the cart shook violently.

“Alice! Say the words.”

Alice, still trembling, looking at me with wide eyes. She shook her head repeatedly. I grabbed the sides of her head and made her stare straight at me.

“Let me go … just for now.”

Alice’s lips slowly parted, soon our time in this life will come to an end.

….

….

And I would not have regretted a thing.

snap