《S.H.E.》CHAPTER TEN

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Gilly hadn’t slept. Not even a single wink.

‘Date – name – sign.’

The woman at the counter pushed a clipboard towards him. He watched her finger trail the line of three separate boxes, above which hundreds of others had already signed out. At the top of the page he read two words.

Departure Sheet.

Gilly signed all three.

‘Mr. Gilly…? You are leaving?’

Gilly turned beneath the bright lights of D.A.R.E. headquarters, only to find Tough Justice standing there behind him.

‘I’m sorry…’ said Gilly, ‘but I’m not the man you think I am.’

He turned then, slinking to where a huge line had already formed. A line full of charges. A line full of folk like Gilly, who, having heard the President’s address had decided that it was far wiser to leave than to stay. After all, he couldn’t be a hero. He was a nobody. He was the man who stayed late at Seldom’s factory. He was the man who’d let his daughter die.

Slowly the line began to dwindle, right toward two, large glass doors, each of them opaque.

Above they read one simple word.

Departure.

As he waited Gilly felt the lack of sleep clawing at his eyes. Above the bright lights seemed to hiss and sting and cut.

You’re not a hero Gilly Rivers. You’ve never been a hero.

He felt his breath rise and fall in his chest, his stomach bubbling, and almost as if he’d drank a full quart of acid. He found his fingers shaking. He needed a cigarette. A drink. How long had he gone without both? His head was pounding. His mind kicking a storm.

‘Hey!’ shouted someone from behind, ‘The lines moving!’

You’re not a hero Gilly Rivers…

He felt those yellow-stain eyes staring out from the darkness of his own thoughts, those yellow-stain teeth.

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‘Please… leave me alone.’

‘Hey! I said the lines moving!’

Leave you alone… Gilly… I am you. Everywhere you go I go. Everything you see… I see.

‘Leave me alone!’ screamed Gilly, his voice ringing across the entire, atrium floor.

His breath heaved in his chest, the entire line turning with horror, each of their eyes there upon him.

Why were the lights so harsh?

Slowly he shuffled forward, right toward those twin glass doors.

Departure.

As he lifted his hand toward the pane, he heard something in his ears.

Thwwwip.

He turned to find Glitch standing there – that dark tunnel – the glitch-hole closing tight behind him.

‘Here… I think you forgot something.’

He felt something shoved within his hands.

Daisy’s backpack.

‘After all,’ said Glitch, his face turning toward the hard lines of an unforgiving stare, ‘I’m sure there’s nothing you could have done.’

Gilly’s eyes widened.

He’d heard that line before… somewhere.

He felt his mind thrown back, there towards the gallery of The Old Justice. Beside him a man sat whispering beneath darkglass optics.

‘There’s nothing you could have done.’ Gilly watched as Seldom smiled, the eyes of the silver griffin held tight against his chest, each of them staring up towards him. ‘There’s only one antidote to this city Mr. Rivers, and that antidote is power, and you…’ Seldom made a long, low noise of terrible disapproval, ‘you... are weak.’

Gilly felt his legs crumble, the backpack spilling forth from his hands. As he hit all fours his chest began to heave. In, out, in, out – too quick for him to manage.

He couldn’t breathe.

He was going to die.

All around he felt the lights going fuzzy, the line of people backing away.

Beside him he felt Glitch crouch down, ‘You’re not weak.’

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The words were like coal-hot brands seared clean across his face.

Again, Glitch’s words rolled. Each of them like the kiss of molten fire.

‘You’re not weak.’

His lungs were screaming, his mind going blank – everything but the sight of two, yellow-stain eyes.

‘Gilly…’

He felt his head turned upward towards Glitch’s cool, green eyes. Eyes he’d never before noticed.

‘You’re not weak.’

‘Stop it’ panted Gilly.

‘You’re not weak.’

‘Stop it.’

‘You’re not weak!’

‘STOP IT!’

It was then that he fell forward, pitched on all fours, his face pressed tight against the cool white floor.

All around he saw the shadow of security guards, each of them forming a ring, and with him at the centre.

Glitch held up his hand, each of them staying put.

It was then that Glitch lay down, right next to Gilly, right there on his back. ‘How long do you plan to live with this fear Dead Man?’

Gilly heaved as he strove for breath.

‘Will you let it take the rest of your life?’

In, out, in, out.

‘And what about Spindle…?’

The memory of red-hair and red-eyes went strolling through his mind, right above a sharp little smile.

‘Will you let him take another… just like he did Daisy?’

‘DON’T YOU TALK ABOUT DAISY!’ All of a sudden Gilly was on top, his hands pinning Glitch against the harsh, white floor.

Glitch held his hand against the air as the guards made to rush.

‘Is that it then…?’ said Glitch, his voice cool and calm despite. ‘Have I got the wrong man?’

Gilly felt his lip begin to quiver, his tears rolling down to splash there against the front of Glitch’s chest.

‘I’m scared…’

He fell forward then, sobbing, the wetness rolling free from his cheeks.

He felt a comforting hand against his shoulder as the two of them lay there, Glitch’s voice soft against his ear.

‘You’re not weak.’

Gilly sobbed even harder, his mind seeming to crack as the memory of Daisy’s smile rushed up through the murk. He saw there the image of that little midnight streak running riot through her pale blonde hair. As he did he howled, there beneath the bright lights of D.A.R.E. Howled until everything he had was spent. And when finally he closed his eyes he slept better than he had in the entire long months since Daisy’s death – better than he had in years – perhaps better even than his entire, miserable life.

***

Glitch and Tough Justice walked side by side through the hallways of D.A.R.E. In the huge arms of Justice there lay a strange little man, his hair a shade of old carrots long gone to mold, his face streaked dry with a line of spent tears.

There was a great smile pinned bright across each of the waking men’s faces.

‘Why is it you never pick the normal one’s?’ Justice’s voice seemed to ring, echoing across the hallways.

Beside him Glitch smiled again, and right beneath the tear-wet tassels of his orca hat.

‘The normal ones don’t have enough pain.’

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