《Kirby System》Penny and the System!
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“Grandma! I’m going out to play outside!” I shouted.
“Make sure to stay where I can see you!”
“Okay!”
I opened the patio door into the backyard, with my trusty sword of justice and super cool Cape of Darkness, I’m going to save the universe! I’m going to help anyone in need and punish some bad guys! Jumping out of the living room and into the backyard made me feel even more like a hero. Grandma’s nice smelling flowers immediately overwhelmed my nose. I always called it the Rainbow Garden but Grandma thought it was silly. I took a quick scan of my surroundings. Grandma’s outside chair that sat near the patio hasn’t been touched, my hero bike still has its lock on, and the shed was closed and locked up. Everything looked the same as yesterday, but there’s a strange feeling in the air.
Yes, a type of feeling that only a righteous and awesome hero can sense. A hero like me of course! My hero sense brought me near the Rainbow Garden. Grandma’s flowers didn’t look this messy yesterday! That must mean we have a sneaky bad guy somewhere in the garden. Whoever they are will have to face my awesome sword of justice!
“Reveal yourself evil doer! I’ve already unearthed your nefarious plot of ruining my grandma’s garden! I don’t know how you found out about my secret plan of using the Rainbow Garden to help spread peace and beauty throughout the planet but I will stop you!”
I saw quick movement to my right while standing over the flower garden. I raised my sword and chopped down only to hear a hissing sound and blur of green quickly slither away.
“You cannot escape justice!!!” My legs chased after the evil snake.
If he thinks he can ruin the Rainbow Garden and get away with it, he has another thing coming! My sword of justice spares no evil. The evil snake was trying to run away outside the fence. I couldn’t let him leave so easily. I used my super speed and dashed ahead of him before cutting off his path of retreat.
“You’re mine now villainous serpent! Perish under my blade!” My sword of justice hacked down towards him.
The serpent used his super move and managed to dodge out of the way of my attack. This isn’t just any average bad guy if he can dodge a swipe from my justice blade. He must be a boss hidden in disguise! Just like Marx! Your cute innocent looks can’t distract me from being the hero the galaxy needs!
“I have just the move for villains like you Snake.” I extended my sword of justice outward and started spinning.
“Tornado Slash!”
There’s no way he could take my ultra move Tornado Slash. With this move, I spin so fast that I create a tornado around my body that will slice up any foes caught up in it. I can also change this move into firing a tornado with just a slash of my sword and then there’s also where I can charge up my sword before doing a super huge tornado. But that move is only for the really big bad guys. Hey why is the ground getting so close to my face? How long have I been spinning...?
I fainted. I didn’t think my Tornado Slash attack could hurt me! No wait it couldn’t have been my Tornado Slash, it had to be Snake! I’ve never fainted using Tornado Slash before so, it had to be Snake! He must have used his Sleepy Glare attack on me while I was charging my special attack! That jerk!
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I don’t know how long Snake kept me asleep but when I woke up there was a strange gem in Grandma’s flower garden. It was blue, shiny, and looked like a diamond. My curiosity and heroic instinct brought me over to the jewel. I carefully looked in Grandma’s window to see her sleeping in her rocking chair. That means she won’t be able to yell at me either for being near her flowers. If I messed up Grandma’s flowers again, she wouldn’t let me play in the backyard anymore. I wonder did Snake make my grandma go to sleep too?
I grabbed the shiny jewel and once my hands closed around it, I heard a weird voice in my head. It sounded like a grumpy old grandpa.
“It seems after a hundred millennia another has finally found my totem.” The grandpa voice said.
“Who are you? How did you get in my head mister?”
“You have taken hold of my totem. It holds a fraction of my power which allows me to conversate with a being like you.”
“Are you an alien!?” I asked.
Was I actually talking to an alien? Was I really talking to an alien from outer space!? I can’t even remember a Kirby game that doesn’t end in going to space! Can I go to space!? Can I be like Kirby and go on adventures on different planets and fly through space helping people!?
“I am not whatever you are.”
“That means you’re an alien! Are you in space right now? Do you have tentacles? Are you a floating eyeball? Can you breathe in space? What’s it like in space? Do you ever go on adventures? Do you help-”
“Quiet creature! Your ceaseless questions are angering me!” The grandpa yelled.
Alien grandpa doesn’t have to be such a big jerk. Just because I wanted to know a couple things doesn’t mean he has to yell at me. He talked to me first. He should be nicer to me. I even found his dumb totem.
“Now if you let me explain, I can---” He stopped nagging.
“Stop that! Do not place your filthy tongue on my totem!”
I just wanted to see if it tasted like blueberries and he’s yelling at me again. I was getting upset now. Well that’s it, I had enough of being yelled at by an alien grandpa. I stuck out my tongue and licked all over the jewel just because he didn't want me too. The jewel started shining a bright light and I had to cover my eyes because of how bright it was. My hand felt weirdly lighter though after the gem stopped shining though .
“No! What have you just done you idiotic creature!? You just become the host of my totem and now have taken a portion of my power! I didn’t want such a unworthy possessor! I wanted a possessor who could help me take over this universe!” His voice was becoming quieter and smaller.
“Serves you right jerk. Maybe next time you won’t be so mean to me.” I told him.
I waited for a response but I didn’t hear anything. Did the alien grandpa leave? Where did the jewel go? It wasn’t in my hand anymore but I did feel a strange feeling in my chest. There was also a weird blinking exclamation point on the top right of my vision. I wonder how did that get there? I tried clicking it with my finger and a blue screen expanded in front of me!
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[Voice Message!]
[Welcome to the Kirby System host! After taking in Atykortc's totem, you have awakened and received some of his power to receive this powerful system! This system will help you accomplish your dreams with the possibility of receiving anything from the fictional Kirby universe! Please think ‘Menu’ to continue with the rest of the introduction to the system!]
Now there’s a happy robot voice in my head this time? How many voices do I have in my head? Is there gonna be a voice that sounds like Shadow next? This kind of looks like a video game. A game in real life?! It’s just like those VR games on ViewTube! I thought ‘Menu’ to see what else this system had to show me. I was excited. I hope I can play this game with my grandma. She still doesn’t even know how the internet works.
[Status]
[Lottery]
[Quests]
[Skills]
[Party]
[Please pick the first option and we’ll go on down the line till you understood everything!]
I clicked on status with my finger and another menu popped up in front of me floating.
[Health: 100/100]
[Alignment: Good]
[Race: Human]
[Achievements: None]
[Money: 0]
[Perks: None]
[Your health tells you how close you are to dying. If you are low on health, please do not engage in dangerous activities and recover it back to 100%! Your alignment tells you how the universe sees you. It can shift between 3 different views: Good, Neutral, and Evil. Depending on the actions you take and the words you say, will be what changes or keeps your alignment. Race tells you what race you are. There are very few ways of changing this throughout the universe. An achievement can be gained through certain actions and can provide skills, perks, or quests! Try and get as many achievements as you can host, it’ll only help! Money is how much cash you got on you. It does not count if it's in a bank or card! Perks can give you an ability that’s similar to skills but cannot be leveled like them.]
My head was getting spinny with all these words being thrown at me. Most of it was going through one ear and out the other. It was nice of the robot voice to try and help me but I don’t think I can understand anything he’s saying. There was a bit too much to take in. The robot voice didn’t seem to notice my overwhelmed state and continued on explaining the entirety of the system without me. I’m sure I can figure this thing out later with Grandma.
[Host. Please choose a starter gift and path as a reward for passing the tutorial.]
I didn’t feel like I passed the tutorial at all because it's still such a big blur. The happy robot voice could talk faster than Angelica at school and she never shuts up! Summer break has never felt so good. All this time to play my games and save the universe as a hero. No one to bother me or tell me to do any homework.
‘What do you mean robot voice by starter gift and path?’
[Starter Gifts Available Below]
[Kirby]
[Meta Knight]
[King Dedede]
[Bandana Waddle Dee]
[Gordo]
[Master Hand]
[Marx]
[Magolor]
[Susie]
[Gooey]
[Wheelie]
...
[Paths Available]
[Good]
[Evil]
No way! No way! You’re joking robot voice! I can choose any one of these? If I pick Kirby would I get to copy people by eating them!? Wait! I don’t want to eat people! That sounds gross! The little pink puff ball may be super cute but his power is kind of gross now that I think about it. Having a floating hand wouldn’t be that cool. What kind of power could help me become the galactic hero I've always dreamed about!? Oh, I know! He may be evil but his power could do it for sure!
“I choose Marx and the path of Good!”
“Penny quit yelling and come eat dinner!” Grandma yelled to me.
“Okay! Here I come!”
Another exclamation mark was in my vision. I tried to click it with my mind while I was running back inside and it popped up without me touching it! Cool!
[Marx Starter Pack Received! Knowledge on how to use your new abilities will flow into your mind soon.]
[Path selected! Main Mission has been added.]
My head started hurting really badly while walking to the dinner table. It smells like Grandma cooked one of my favorite foods tonight, fried chicken! I would be running in there to eat but whatever the robot voice gave me really hurts. I tried to use some of the new stuff coming into my brain and soon felt the back of my shirt stretch out before seeing wings pop out of my back! I tried to move them with my back and they slowly opened and closed. The wings felt like trying to flex with my back while at the same time breathing. It was kind of weird but I HAD WINGS! Weird bone-like wings but I HAD WINGS!
“GRANDMA!!!”
My feet moved faster than they ever did before. Making it into the kitchen, my grandma didn’t even turn around to look at me! She was still cooking some nasty green beans to put with my chicken and french fries!
“What is it girl? Quit yelling in the house.” She asked still with her back turned.
“Grandma look! I have wings!”
“And I can control ice Penny. Now get your butt in that seat and get ready to eat.”
“No Grandma I'm serious! Turn around!” I screamed.
“Girl if this is some more nonsense, I swear I'm taking that phone---”
She finally saw. I did a little spin while smiling, showing off my new wings to her. I even flapped them and started flying a little bit off the ground to show that they were real. Her response after seeing me fly with them wasn’t as excited as mine. She looked like she was afraid of me. Like I was some sort of monster or something.
“Grandma what’s wrong? I got my wings from my robot friend! He’s in my head but I can show you! Watch this!”
I sent Grandma a party invite and she gasped and stepped back when she saw the pop up. She accident placed her hand on the stove and burned her hand.
“Grandma! Be careful!” I flew over to her using my new wings to help her calm down.
She still looked scared out of her mind. Oh man, Grandma really doesn’t get how cool video games are. This must be so confusing to her. That reminds me, I should never let her try on a VR helmet. She might have a heart attack from thinking she was in heaven or something. I grabbed Grandma’s hands to help her calm down and breathe while still flying in the air.
“Grandma you have to accept it. Just think about pressing yes and you’ll be in my party.” I told her.
She nodded and soon she was in my party.
[Isabelle Blossom has joined your party!]
[Health: 90/100]
[Alignment: Neutral]
[Race: Human]
[Achievements: 5]
[Money: $200]
[Perks: 2]
[Achievement Gained: Made A Friend!]
[Reward: Perk: Friendly]
[Friendly– Makes it easier to befriend another.]
“Wow Grandma your status looks better than mine! Take a look at your skills and tell me what you have!”
“Okay girl. Stop flying around me like a fly, let’s eat dinner first before we figure out whatever this is you have...” She told me.
I rapidly shook my head in agreement. Happy that Grandma was back to normal and not acting so weird anymore, I sat down at the table despite really wanting to fly and eat my food instead. My good mood was immediately ruined by Grandma placing a small plate of green beans in front of me. I didn’t even have to look up to see her looking at me waiting for me to complain.
“I wish we had a dog.” I complained.
“You still would have to eat all your green beans. Vegetables make dogs sick.” She told me, as if she already knew what I was planning.
“I wasn’t going to feed him my green beans!” I lied.
“Who said anything about you feeding him green beans?” She smirked.
“Eugh! They’re so nasty though! Why do I have to eat them?! They look like boogers!” I whined even more.
“Because they are good for you. Nutritious delicious boogers. I loved eating green beans when I was your age. They’re why I have a better status than you.” She smiled at me.
She didn’t even know what a status was before I just showed her! She’s making stuff up. She wants to poison me with the green beans. She’s out to get me! Her only granddaughter!
“Eat. Young lady.” She ordered.
That tone of voice got rid of all options of me not eating. If I tried to avoid it any longer, she’s gonna go into Punishment Mode and take away something I care about. My heart was beating rapidly while looking at the disgusting beans, my hand was shaking as I brought the beans closer to my mouth with the spoon. I retched at the smell and immediately wanted to throw the spoon away but the look on Grandma’s face dared me to waste her homecooked food. I wanted to cry.
“What kind of Hero of the Galaxy can’t even eat some veggies? I heard that Olivia eats all her vegetables. I guess that’s why she calls herself the Princess of the Galaxy.”
“She’s not a princess of anything! She just stole my thing because she wanted to tell me what to do! A Princess of the Galaxy can’t order a Hero of the Galaxy to do what they want. A hero is free! A hero is a protector of the innocent! A hero---”
“Eats their vegetables! Now eat before it gets cold Penny Bloom.” She slammed her hand on the kitchen table.
My lips pursed as I gathered all my heroic courage and willpower. Snake from the garden didn’t hold a candle to the galactic evil that is vegetables. His evil spawns wreak havoc upon all innocent young heroes. They go by many names: Brussel Sprouts, Carrots, Broccoli, Spinach, and many more! Their evil is known all throughout the galaxy, plaguing the universe with their disgustingness and mind controlling abilities that makes adults think they are somehow good for you!
One quick glance back at Grandma and I knew I had no longer could afford to hesitate. I swooped a horrible amount of beans onto my spoon and as fast as I grabbed them, I shoved them in my mouth. My tongue fiercely protested the invasion of foreign threats, he called for backup and the throat tried to reject any invaders from going down him by making me want to puke. But my teeth were forced to become traitors, they crushed the intruders as fast as they could and my grossed-out tongue couldn’t do anything but accept it.
“See. Now was that so bad? Eat some more and I’ll give you your chicken and fries.” Grandma smiled.
My tongue hung out of my mouth, trying to get the nasty taste of green beans out but it was useless against the power that was my grandma. I had no choice but to finish the detestable veggies. The long 100-year torture that my grandma said was good for me finally ended with all the green beans gone and plotting to ruin my stomach from the inside. If I don’t explode tonight, it will only be through the mighty strength of my heroic stomach. Now it was time for the rewards of all the suffering I went through. But first, I have to get this yucky green bean taste out of my mouth. I went over to the sink and filled it with water to rinse my mouth out.
“Here you go girl. Always overreacting when it comes to vegetables.” Grandma placed my chicken and fries at my part of the table when I was returning.
“Finally! The hero’s reward! The treasure at the long end of a dangerous journey!” I dug in with joy.
I could tell Grandma was making that face again whenever she thought I was acting silly but I was serious! Fried chicken with french fries were one of the best things to eat. If I had any control over what I ate, I would eat chicken and fries every Monday, MickeyRonalds every Tuesday, candy Wednesday, ice cream Thursday, pizza Friday, waffles and bacon Saturday, and macaroni and cheese on Sundays.
It would take me some time to finished all my dinner but when I did, Grandma called me into the living room.
“Now let’s talk about this video game thing of yours girl.”
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