Yahoo Messenger: 9 May 2001 07:06 PM

Subject: love could not do anything but get love

romeobanglore: helllllooooooooooooooo

romeobanglore: ok...after one hour???

romeobanglore: I will answer your question then

julietscity: ok

julietscity: are you there now?

julietscity: Having lunch with your friends?

romeobanglore: hello...I am back

julietscity: yes, I heard your knocking

julietscity: hello

julietscity: something wrong?

julietscity: You can't spend too much time chatting during working hours, right?

romeobanglore: hello

romeobanglore: lunch is over

romeobanglore: it's ok

romeobanglore: I can talk now

julietscity: I don't have anything special to say ... you already know what you should know

romeobanglore: nowadays, I am spending all my free time looking at your photos which we took from K city

romeobanglore: ok...you told me that you messed up my life...

julietscity: you have all the copies

romeobanglore: I said you didn't

romeobanglore: let me explain

romeobanglore: yes...

romeobanglore: oh...I have to scan them for you...ok...I'll do it

julietscity: you may have your plan ... you may not be preparing for marriage or have children ... and you never thought you would love someone and bring a lot of trouble, hurt and sadness.

romeobanglore: but you know, I wanted love....and I got it from you

romeobanglore: and I got so much of love from you that I began to believe in love and life

julietscity: In reality ... just falling in love can't solve any problems ... that's just an excuse for evasion.

romeobanglore: love could not do anything but get love

romeobanglore: you know the problems created by love may not be solved by love

julietscity: we don't need to talk about love ... it will hurt you and me further

romeobanglore: yes...what I wanted to say is...you never did any bad thing in my life

julietscity: Just leave love there ... never mention it again.

romeobanglore: I am indebted to you for giving me hope and fresh air in life.

romeobanglore: does it mean that we don't love each other?

julietscity: the more you mention ... the more hurt love will do.

julietscity: just keep it inside or leave it somewhere

romeobanglore: ok

julietscity: I understand what you are talking about

romeobanglore: ok...

julietscity: you are always happy to show me your heart ... only I always hurt you for my problems

romeobanglore: I just thought of some things...

julietscity: Do you need to go back to work?

romeobanglore: but it is good...I should get hurt sometimes...as you say, I deserve it

romeobanglore: I feel better talking to you than working

julietscity: but you have more work to do now

romeobanglore: you have to do something or go somewhere?

julietscity: yes... discussing everything with you is a good thing ... lying is not a good thing for me

julietscity: No... I always stay at home and go to some foreign job websites ... ask your boss ... can I work in India?

romeobanglore: honey...I am sorry I talked about meeting you in July or August

julietscity: hmm... I know this is impossible ... India's salary is lower.

romeobanglore: it is not a good situation to work in India...you may not get the job which my boss offered you some time back...because the company does not have many projects now

julietscity: You know, when you say that, I'm certainly happy. However, you shouldn't give me hope ... because I will not reserve a new job just to see you ... In order to see you in July, if I have a new job, I will not have time for you. There will be no extra vacations for new jobs.

julietscity: so...money also is a problem...That's why I answered it like that

julietscity: If you can't come here in July or August ... we will fight more and more ... I will hate a lot of things, I will lose myself again, again ... I know very well that I have to work. But how can I tell you I didn't go to work ... until this morning it was a white lie.

romeobanglore: do not wait...if I want to meet you, I will come and meet you...you don't have to take any leaves

romeobanglore: it's ok...you should go for work...even if I come there, you don't have to take leaves...just like I did in Germany...and money also...I will make the money I want

romeobanglore: and when money is ready, I will come and meet you...forget about July...

julietscity: hmmm... I don't know what we are doing now ... is it really good for each other? Or ... do you think we are doing it right?

romeobanglore: I don't know

romeobanglore: right thing means? for the future? for money?

julietscity: for the future

julietscity: do you feel pain? Whenever I fight with you like this and talk about living together without a solution

romeobanglore: I don't know...

romeobanglore: if we don't meet...will it be good?

julietscity: but ... if I have money, I want to see you ... I will also fly to Bangalore to see you

romeobanglore: I feel pain because I know you are hurting yourself...you are torturing yourself...my honey, my honey, my dearest honey...I can't stand that

romeobanglore: till now, I have told you not to come to Bangalore...but now I change...you are welcome to come here

julietscity: I just want to ease your pain as soon as possible...

romeobanglore: but not now...after we both have enough money

romeobanglore: NEVER...I don't want to be happy when you are sad

julietscity: I know... thank you for inviting me...

romeobanglore: I never want that

romeobanglore: no need for any thanks...I did that also for me

julietscity: What should I do? I've always wanted to hide our feelings... saying to myself this is good for our future... I did a good job when you went to Madras, you know. But now... what the hell are we doing? We just push our emotions further to hurt ourselves every day.

romeobanglore: honey

julietscity: yes

romeobanglore: can we hide our emotions forever?

julietscity: yes... If we hide sadly... maybe

romeobanglore: and pretend that we have no feeling for each other?

romeobanglore: that we have never shared our mind?

romeobanglore: that we have never felt each other's body?

romeobanglore: it is good to think like that...but we know the truth

romeobanglore: NO!!! DO NOT HIDE...PLEASE!!!!!

romeobanglore: do not hide things...maybe hide feelings

julietscity: ok

romeobanglore: hiding things like your job...NEVER!!! but maybe hide your love to me

julietscity: hmmm...

romeobanglore: you think better than me...

julietscity: no...I am not sure of many things

romeobanglore: you know, before I said yesterday that I want to meet you, I have been excited for days thinking of you...that might have been the reason I told you that...but you opened my eyes

julietscity: opened your eyes?

romeobanglore: I have to learn to control my body and mind more

romeobanglore: opened my eyes...means you showed me how things are

julietscity: you forgot to buy me a lottery ticket from your hometown

romeobanglore: I didn't go home, I chose to stay here!

julietscity: you were there...last time

romeobanglore: I will buy a lottery for you...

julietscity: haaha... you said before

romeobanglore: haha...but you know I am not that lucky...the only luck I had in my life is finding you

romeobanglore: I love to see your smile

julietscity: no... it's bad luck also

romeobanglore: I was in my state for just some hours

romeobanglore: No...it is my best luck...In that sense, I am the luckiest person!

julietscity: hmm...

romeobanglore: the mind can be controlled...sometimes the body goes out of control!

julietscity: Amy just called me and asked if I would go back to the committee to do the same job

julietscity: I answered NO

romeobanglore: are you sure?

julietscity: yes...but I don't want to go back there

romeobanglore: good...you have the respectful character

julietscity: My department will not have enough budget to control the festivals and ceremonies ... so it will be very difficult for me ... I don't want to go back to work there.

julietscity: I want to dedicate myself to what I can achieve.

julietscity: at least it's mine

julietscity: yes