From: Kamal E Y [email protected]>

To: Sabrina [email protected] >

Sent: 1st September, 1999 06:22 PM

Subject: The course of true love

Dear Princess,

This mail, I will treasure for a long long time to come. I felt just like I was reading your mind, or like your mind is thinking inside me. It was something I have never experienced. I don't know why I felt like that. You put down everything the way you think. Without any artificial wordings. And I found it easy to identify my thoughts with yours. This mail I will remember for a long time.

You didn't give me problems. It will be fair if I say that I gave you problems by blindly loving you. You tried to go away. I refused to let you go. You wanted to be with someone in your city. I refused to listen. I didn't have anything to give you, but my heart. I refused when you told we would meet. And I didn't allow you to go and meet anyone else. You wanted to go freely in your life. I hindered you. You wanted to become a bun of Buddha, once. I scolded you. Your days were once hassle-free. I made it disturbing. Your nights were silent and still, I made them sleepless. It is I who caused problems for you. Just because my heart ruled me and it still rules me.

Shakespeare once wrote, "The course of true love never flows smooth." There will be turbulences that make us become strong. Sometimes we may end up in a sea, nowhere to be seen. But we will flow, flow up to the end. Perhaps, someone will write a story about all those. We may live through the lips of a train passenger reading that story somewhere in the distant future.

You wrote about the loneliness of our and it touched me deeply. Making decisions of our won and no one to ask anything. Living on your own instincts, not revealing emotions to anyone. How I found out you? Far away from me, alone in the house, writing novels and working silently...how?

I know you love kids. I knew it from the first letter you wrote. I to. I want a girl child like you. Now you are my child too, not only my lover.

You can handle a whole film festival on your own, you have proved it. That's why you are again invited to be the chairperson. I am a bit scared. You are beautiful, and someone may approach you...I don't want to think about that.

We will share our thinking, our plans for everything. I will try to help you in every way I can. I told you I am immature because I don't have any experience in life. But we will do it...

About our meeting, I told you, three days will not be enough. We will get only one day to spend with each other. And that too amidst all the tensions. DO you think I don't want to meet you? That is the only thing I keep thinking about every day. We have to meet. But let us bear the pain with patience. Love and patience will be rewarded one day. I am still too romantic to believe in all these sayings. When I try to get rational, many things disturb me. So I keep myself away from all, only to think of you...

I will read your last mail whenever I feel lonely. I will then now there is someone who shares my feelings...

Yours irrational

Kamal