《Through Norr's Eyes》Chapter 2: Mother, I love you
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10 years later.
“Norr, I am here.” I heard a familiar voice behind me.
“Mom. You shouldn’t pass so much time with me, Father will get angry at you again.” I turned around, happy to have her near me.
“Don’t worry about that! You have it worse than me, being locked here all the time, and having to do those horrible things… I’m very sorry about this. If only I had the power to do something about it, your father wouldn’t have been able to use me to gain your obedience.”
Indeed, I had to obey Father’s orders perfectly, or my mother would get hurt. He made me punish all those who opposed his restrictive laws and demands by looking at them in their eyes. I felt disgusting helping this tyrant achieve his goals, but I didn’t want to involve my mother in this matter.
My father had, at first, raised me lovingly, trying to win me over to his side. When I was finally old enough to understand what he was making me do, he repulsed me more than ever, and I locked myself in my room for almost a month before he dropped his gentle act and dragged my mother in our conflict. He beat her up right in front of my door until she lost consciousness, even after I begged him to stop and promised I would do as I said. He knew I loved her more than anyone, and used her to threaten me. I didn’t have any other choice than to obey. But, my heart was raging, and every day, I trained both my mind and my body, hoping to get strong enough one day to free myself and my mother from this situation.
“Mother! I told you many time before. It’s not your fault, it’s mine. If my eyes weren’t this dangerous, we wouldn’t be in this situation. If only I was stronger, I could free you from Father. I promise you to escape with you from this town when I gain more power.”
I felt her gentle hands on my face.
“Mom?”
“… I’m sorry… I was just wondering if I will ever get to see your face…”
“You know I need this mask. If I didn’t wear it, you wouldn’t be allowed to even come near me.” I said. We already had this conversation many times, but Mother seemed to get more depressed every time. “I am dangerous, after all. I wouldn’t want to hurt you.”
“I love you. You are very precious to me, Norr.” She told me calmly.
“I love you too. Without you, I would have gone mad.” I answered honestly. I wasn’t ashamed of telling her my true feelings, because she was the only person in the world that cared about me.
“You know, Norr, the people are starting to rebel against the church,” she whispered to me. “I think it won’t be long until they take up their arms, and at that time, their first target might be you.”
“What? But, they know what fait awaits traitors—“ Mother hugged me and continued talking.
“Your father is abusing his power too much, and his threats aren’t as powerfull anymore. He can kill a few people to set an example, but he even he won’t go as far as to kill every villager simply to keep his position. He needs them to prosper, and they know that. The people also understand that he uses God for his own will and that he doesn’t really serve Him. He raised the tax yet again, and most of it goes directly in his pocket. Also… They will probably target you first. You are the only reason some people hesitate t fight your father; they are afraid of you. If you are gone, the rebels will win. Your father is too drunk in power to even realize this, and he probably won’t be of any help.”
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“I… I understand their reasoning. It is normal that they would want to kill me, too. I don’t blame them. I only blame my father.” The villagers always hated me, for good reasons of course, since I killed a lot of them. It was all my father’s wishes, and I was doing it reluctantly, but in the end, I was the one killing them.
“Mary, your time is up! Come out, you’ll get more time with the monster next week,” I heard a soldier say.
“I need to go. Be strong, I will come back with more news. Here, take those books. I’ll take the ones from last time,” she said as she gave me a pile of books and took back the ones she brought last week. This had become a ritual for us. At first, it was so that I could learn to write and read, but recently, the books I received were getting more and more practical, aiming to help me get stronger. I read them in my free time, when the guards weren’t watching and I could take off the mask sealing my view. The books were very diverse in genre, going from stories to informative books, as well as newspapers. I learned a lot because of those, and I enjoyed reading them.
When I heard the door closing, I took off my mask and skimmed through the books I received. An Introduction to Magic, Reading the Flow of Combat, The Daily News (7), 99 Tales of Legendary Heroes, The Basics of Magic, Everything there is to know about Alchemy. Five books and seven newspapers. And of the five books, only one was fictive. This was all fine to me, because after reading so much about the Legendary Heroes, I would be lying if I said I wasn’t interested in learning some of their skills.
I started the week reading about magic. There were two books on the subject and both said pretty much the same thing: There are a lot of Magic Elements, which need to be awakened in order to use them, like White Magic, the one my mother used. But even without awakening to an Element, one can use magic by feeling and manipulating the ambient mana. The Elements are used to transform that mana into something else. For example, the Fire Element changes the mana into Fire, White Element transforms it to heal wounds, etc. Pure, raw mana can also be used, but is often seen as useless and powerless. In fact, every mage needs to train with mana before using their Element. It is a basic training, and every mage out there has to know how to manipulate mana.
I passed time trying to feel the mana around me. It was a really hard task as I wasn’t sure how I was supposed to go at it, and I was never able to do so. The rest of the week was spent alternating between reading, trying to sense mana and doing some exercise. My father didn’t contact me this week to do some “cleaning”, so time passed quickly, free of stress.
“Norr?” I heard my mother’s voice and turned towards her. Of course, I had my mask on. I only took it off to read, but I put it back for everything else.
“Mom! How is it outside?” I asked her.
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“Actually…” She seemed worried about something, and I was going to ask her about it when I heard other people talking.
“Here it is. The monster…”
“Shhh, it might hear you!”
“This mask does suit him actually. If it didn’t wear it, we might think it’s human.”
People were whispering about me in the direction my mother was.
“Mom, you didn’t come alone?” I asked.
I felt her warmth as she embraced me, and heard her sobbing. “They decided to execute you, as I thought. They want to execute you publicly to show everyone that you are no longer a threat to their freedom. They plan on killing your father and me afterwards. I begged them to come see you one last time.” She whispered.
“Why didn’t you run away? You could have survived…” I started crying, hearing that my mother would die soon because of me. I didn’t want this! I didn’t care about me being killed, I had it coming. But my mother never did anything wrong!
“Oy, Mary, get away from him! We’ll lead him to the plaza. We only agreed to have you follow us! Don’t rush it, your death will come after his!” I heard a man yell at my mother. He gripped her and separated us, so I started yelling, crying and swinging my arms at everything and everyone around me.
“Boss, what do we do about him?” Asked another man who came behind me and restrained my arms. I started kicking him, but he didn’t budge.
“God, he’s annoying! Will you calm down already?” He yelled.
“No! I want my mother! Don’t you dare touch her with your filthy hands! Where are you? You coward! Don’t touch her! Mother! Where are you?” I cried, still trying to get away from the man’s grip.
“Hmm…Excuse me?” I heard my mother say.
“Huh? What do you want?” Their boss retorqued.
“I think he would be way calmer if I was the one leading him there… Would you let me do it?” She pleaded.
“… Okay, sure,” the boss said.
I felt the soft hands of my mother on my neck, and I immediately calmed myself. As long as she is with me, I’m willing to do anything! I thought.
“Norr.” She whispered once again. “You will escape this. I promise you.”
“What?” I tried asking for more information, but she didn’t continue. I felt her hands go from my neck to my shoulders as she moved behind me, and she gave me a light push in the back, indicating I needed to start walking.
Mother led me all the way to the place I was going to get killed. I felt my mother hugging me, and I tightened my grip around her arms. I was afraid. What I thought earlier wasn’t true anymore. I wasn’t willing to die, even for her. No matter how much I loved her, I didn’t want to die. I was afraid. I was afraid. Too afraid. I didn’t want to leave her. I didn’t want her to leave me.
“Norr.” Her whisper cleared up my mind. “Look at me.” How did she want me to look at her? I had my mask. “Open your eyes.” I tried opening my eyes. The sun hit my pupils and I had to close them right after. Why wasn’t my mask there? I had it on the way. Did it fall?
“Open your eyes, Norr.” Her gentle voice calmed me down. I didn’t have to think this hard. She was right there, by my side. If she was the one telling me to open my eyes, I simply had to do it. I believed in her. I slowly opened my eyes and saw her face for the first time. I quickly looked down, afraid of the consequences if I met her eyes.
“Norr, you are not a monster. You are my son, and I love you for who you are. Please, run away. You need to live. You lost your childhood because of your father, but you are still alive. Run away, find your path and follow your dreams. Please, live your life fully, so that you don’t regret anything. Live for me.” She took my head in her hands and lifted it up.
“Mom! I don’t want to! Please! I don’t want to live without you! Don’t!” I resisted and shut my eyes tight.
“Norr, look at me in the eyes when you talk to me. You won’t kill me. Even if you do, I’ll forgive you. I love you. You are not a monster.” I slowly lifted my head, observing her face, but dodging her eyes. She was beautiful, had a perfect, slender face and long, silver hair. Finally, I looked at her brilliant, blue eyes. She smiled warmly, murmured “I love you, don’t forget that,” and slowly fell to the ground.
Time seemed to slow down. I really did it, I killed the only person that was dear to me. I looked around, lost, not knowing what to do to. Then, I remembered what she said: “Run away. Live for me.” I took back my mask from her hand, and met eyes with everyone around me. They were the reason my mother died, the reason for her distress, the reason she was so lonely. They had to pay a price, and this price was having to look into my eyes. The Demon’s eyes as they liked to call them. Finally, when there was no one left but me standing, I ran away from the town, straight into the forest, leaving my dear mother behind me. “Run away, live for me.” One of her wishes had come true, now I had to live for her.
Time came back to normal, and I ran until I couldn’t know where I had come from anymore. I was lost in the woods, without food or any mean of survival, but I had successfully ran away. I crawled in a nearby cave and cried myself to sleep, grieving my mother.
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