《This Is Where I Want To Be》Your Laughing Now But…
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110. Your Laughing Now But…
Juliet
Michaels’s hands gripped my naked thighs behind him on the bike. Every time we returned home, it had been hours of his hands all over me… Hours of just driving, and I loved it. The open road and the freedom. When he relaxed, his hands found my skin… He wasn’t thinking, and it was just natural… rubbing over it and grabbing onto me.
A few Sundays, we had gone out and drove the whole morning. Had brunch at some obscure pub. Sometimes we got wasted and had to stay at a motel. Always separate rooms. Louis told us to be careful of intrusion symptoms.
We made friends with everybody sitting at the bar and chatting about everything. Hearing what they say about the aliens and laughing our asses off when we were alone. I loved spending time with him.
We stopped in front of the red gates, and when I got off, he hit his helmet with mine softly. Slowly he got off and parked the bike dragging me closer and kissing me. It was the first time. When he unlocked his lips from mine. There was something in his eyes.
“I must be feeling better. This is really hard… I think I’ll join you and Louis soon.” His arms were so long that they wrapped around me when we hugged. I felt enveloped by him.
“Do you want me to… come to your bed tonight?” Only one corner of his mouth lifted.
“Not tonight. I’m still a little scared… I don’t want to hurt you… But soon, okay.” I bit my lip disappointed. He was so close, and I didn’t want to manipulate him.
“You know Juliet, I will take the bike to the shop. There is something wrong, and I’ll walk back okay. I don’t want to have to push it tomorrow.” There was a heaviness in his voice.
I sighed a heavy sigh but nodded reluctantly. He was getting on… Usually, he would invite me to his room, and the three of us would just talk… He saluted me with two fingers. Like I was the boss. He turned the bike around and started it... Something was off. It felt for a moment that I wouldn’t see him again…
“Hey! You’re coming back, right?”
“I’m not gonna hurt you….” My brow furrowed. But he started the bike again and left.
***
Marcus
Kubra had picked me up at the station that was on the compound. It was the first time I was back. A month ago, Kubra brought me another letter from Louis... More of a suggestion to come to earth for a night.
{“Marcus… It’s time… If after you still want to leave, I’ll help you….”}
“I know what’s going on, Marcus. I think it’s a mistake. Not like this.” Kubra said. After I read the words.
“It’s been more than a year Kubra.”
“Do you think you’ll be able to handle it? You can’t go like this.” He said softly.
***
It had taken me a month to get myself in the right mind frame. I was going to have to sneak out. I had let Soren go home for the month. I let him go home a lot the last few months…
I didn’t know if Juliet knew that I would be coming home for the night. For an hour…
She walked through the gate. My jaw flexed at the shorts she had on. The thin button-up shirt hung low. Her bra was visible, and the chains around her neck.
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“Hey, guys, we’re back. Why is it so dark?”
I had sat there a million times fantasizing about this. Her there and with me… coming back from a walk… Coming home to me. She didn’t know I was coming. I smiled. I didn’t know how it was going to go… The last time Juliet and I had seen each other was a crap night.
It wasn’t entirely dark. They had lined the walkway with tiny fairy lights. It suited her... I didn’t mind her was making the place her own… She made her way past me. Didn’t even see me. I was on a deck chair next to the pool. Just seeing her healthy was a reward in itself.
I cleared my throat. She stopped abruptly, thinking for a second. She smelled the air and ran for her room. Closing the door and locking it. I had to chuckle. I could just go in at the other door. She knew what was coming, and if I was her… I would hide too.
I smiled again. Shaking my head at that stupid girl.
She had four husbands, and she was still nervous as hell. I was trying, and I forced myself not to go down that road. The jealousy road. Slowly I got up and made my way to the door leaning against it. She was sitting on the other side. On the floor, her heart pounding.
I sat down on the outside. So we were across from each other. My elbows resting on my knees, my head leaning back onto the door.
“I thought you’ve done this before?” Nothing. Joking wasn’t going to work.
“Is it the place?” I asked.
A faint “No.”
“Is it me?”
Another faint, “No.”
“I haven’t seen you in a year… except for dinner. And more months.”
She swallowed hard.
“Should I promise to let you take the lead?”
The last faint, “No.”
Her voice was soft and sweet. It was driving me up the wall. I wanted to break down the door. Fight with her. Tell her how hurt I was… But I didn’t.
“Is it the kisses?”
A ragged, “Yes.”
I bobbed my head. Moving in the right direction. “How long has it been?”
“Seven years… Mar…cus.” I had forgotten… I was so old… time meant nothing to me anymore.
The way my name rolled off her tongue made me wild inside. That day we kissed before we came. It escaped her lips. When she pulled me against her… she didn’t even realize it. I had thought she wanted me to stop. I pulled away, but her nails dug into my back to keep me in place. Her head had lifted, her eyes closed, exposing her neck so I could suck on it. I groaned, wanting her so bad. Just thinking about it wasn’t enough…
“So, how long do you think this will take?” I tried to keep my voice light… I didn’t mean to push her. Everybody’s words were in the back of my mind. She unlatched the lock and slowly opened the door. I kept sitting like that, disappointed that I had said something wrong. I was mucking this up.
She waited until I got up. Didn’t meet my gaze when I did. Her arms crossed over her chest, rubbing herself as if she was cold. It didn’t seem defensive… She was just that nervous. I didn’t know what to do. My defenses were failing. Juliet was nervous…?
“I have a lot of regrets, Marcus. I…” She bit the inside of her mouth. “I don’t know why. I feel so bad that everything had turned out this way… You have to share me. I don’t even know why you’re still here.” She swallowed hard again. Her heartbeat just kept increasing.
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Juliet reached for her shirt’s buttons and started undoing them one by one. She was pushing through. The gesture of her slow fingers was my weakness. My breathing was ragged, knowing what was coming. I couldn’t help myself. I reached both hands out and slid the fabric off her shoulders. It fell to the floor. I slid my fingers over her soft skin. Every touch got a reaction from her.
“Did I prove myself to you, Julie?” I had to ask.
Her eyes slowly came up. A ragged, “Yes.”
She held out her hands for mine. She took both and put them on her breasts. I stepped closer, and my hands slid behind her. Unclasping the fabric. Coming back to touch her.
Her eyes closed, frowning. I let go of her. “What?”
“It feels… too good, Mar…cus. You make me feel so… good.”
I drew in a slow breath. “I’m so nervous.” She whispered.
“Look at me, Julie.” Her eyes opened. I met hers. I let them drift down to her mouth, my hand following. Touching her lips… Down to her neck, my hand following… down to her breasts. My hand was desperately touching her. My lips slightly parted, my mouth salivating. I came the same way back up. Her hand reached for my neck. She pulled me closer, tilting her head.
“Open your mouth…”
I didn’t meet her halfway with my tongue that time. She had to make good on her promise in the car. Her tongue pushed past my lips… past my teeth, and swirled inside my mouth until her legs were weak. I had to catch her around the waist, picking her up lips on mine. Her arms were around my neck.
“You taste so good…” she whispered.
“I can’t anymore Julie. It hurts…I’m sorry I pushed you.” She nodded in small quick movements, and I closed the door behind us.
***
Juliet
Marcus carried me to the bed and put me down. He stood on his knees, gazing down at me while pulling down my pants and panties in a slow movement. He got up and took off his shirt. Undid his belt and then dropped his own clothes. Watching me… watch him.
“Put your hands under your back… if you touch me, I’ll go in like thirty seconds.” He lowered himself down on the bed, my legs spreading.
“How wet are you?”
I frowned. He was being a little demanding and unromantic… “You could just check.”
He shook his head. “If I touch you… Felt how soft and slippery you are… I’ll cum right now.”
“We have the whole night.”
“I have an hour, then I have to go back. I snuck out…”
It wasn’t what I wanted to hear… but I was pushing through. Regardless. Before I opened the door, I had made the decision. Hoping… praying that we sleeping together would make the difference.
“Do I make you feel that good… Marcus?” He was wordless and grasping at air. Coming back up onto his knees, sitting back onto his feet. Did he not know what to say? Was he still… angry about Soren?
“Do I need to say it?” He barely got the words out. “Can’t you see what you do to me? Can’t you feel what happens between us every time?”
I shook my head. Of course I knew… Was that why he was so angry?
“You will have to start telling me how you feel. Since the mountain walk, I laid it all out there. We haven’t had time.”
I lifted my legs and placed my ankles on his shoulders. His eyes darted from my face to the two legs running down his body. His hands gripped my thighs, rubbing down to my ass. Gripping all of it in his hands. His fingers came back up, and he grazed me slightly, feeling me. He swore softly… My eyes closed, and my back arched.
“Julie… you are so wet… Are you trying to kill me?”
“You like to watch… don’t you want to see.” I reached over to the lamp on the bedside table and put the light on. I put my hands back behind my back like he asked. He was frozen, gripping onto me.
“Lower your legs and spread them.” I did as I was told.
He took himself in hand and pushed into me… in one deep thrust. Whether it was going to hurt or not. My hands wanted to grip onto something. Defenseless, my head and upper body jerked up, gasping and moaning simultaneously.
“F-… Mar… cus” I whispered. His lips grabbed mine.
His eyes never left mine roaming my face even while his mouth was on mine, hungry… coming back to my eyes and taking it all in as he moved back and forth on me. He didn’t close his eyes… he watched me with every thrust. I watched him until he couldn’t anymore… They closed by themselves, and he came… his face contorted from the pleasure. Feeling his body shake and his legs twitching on top of me. Soft grunts and moans escaped his mouth. I was still too nervous to even think about cumming. He hadn’t had anybody in forever. He relaxed, opening his eyes again.
“I love watching you… I love you… Julie. I was very jealous in the beginning. When Chris was with you in that club and protecting you. Louis was there… I had to take you away from them… I didn’t want to share you… But at the fights… my father… what he did to you. I just stood there…”
My hands jumped out from behind me, my legs wrapped around his body, keeping him in me when he wanted to pull out.
“I should have done something… I should have killed him right there… When I woke up and looked down on Louis pushing that thing into your flesh… I can’t explain it… I was relieved to see my father on his knees. Something happened at that moment… When it was Louis saving you… I was set free of any hold Qadir had on me. I knew… I…” Marcus swallowed, trying to keep himself together.
My hands started moving over his skin… His eyes closed. He complained in our language thrusting against me. “I knew I had to love you better.” He whispered. “And I’m sorry that it took me so long. I wanted… you to love me the way I thought you should… Even… with… Soren… “ He tried to pull away, but I kept him close.
“I hurt you…?” I asked softly, rubbing my hand over his cheek.
He shook his head, disgusted with himself. “How? With my past, do I know how to love anybody… Seeing the way Louis loves you. The way Chris thinks he doesn’t.”
“You giving yourself to me like this should be enough. Nothing else matters to me. But what you want… what you need… and what you deserve… I’ll never forget those words.”
I pushed him out and off me, reaching for the drawer next to the bed. I took out some rags to clean myself and him. He was just lying there spilling his guts while I was busy.
I got on top of him and kissed him. That time I just kissed him. We had never made out. And I don’t know how long our hands touched each other. How long my lips and his met over and over. Hot and heavy…
When I couldn’t take it anymore, I reached down and waited until he was hard again. I climbed back on top of him, rubbing myself all over him. Using him… Up and down until I was so close, letting him slip inside me. His hands gripped my waist. Flipped me over, pushing in deeper... Not thrusting, just sliding against me… “I’m so close, Mar…cus” He went slowly… into me until I moaned, and my hands gripped my hair until… I wasn’t thinking at all... His mouth grabbed my one breast exploding me into a loud moan as I cummed. He stayed at the same pace until I stopped shaking and my breathing evened out.
“Can I.” He asked. I nodded excitedly. He started pumping. He went at it longer, holding out that time to lengthen the experience. I didn’t care. I just wanted to feel him inside me forever. We kissed and stopped only when we needed to catch our breath.
His intensity deepened, thrusting harder. Every time sounded an audible pant. When he was close… he pushed up onto his knees, lifting up mine, so he grasped them under his shoulders. More control and more depth. Deep in and out until… All I could do was fist the sheets. He cummed, pounding hard into me, grunting voraciously. It felt for a second that he was getting his anger out… He was hurt… I didn’t mind. He frowned when I pulled my legs from his hold, stretching them at his sides. His worry made me smile.
“Am I too rough?”
Should I have told him what Louis did to me? Or that I was on a bike for hours… a guy between my legs. It bothered me a little that he didn’t even mention Michael. “No… not too rough…” But I did have to ask… “Were you holding back? Are you going to want to tie me up at one stage?”
He smiled… Marcus smiled… pulling out of me, dropping down beside me, spent.
“No… That’s about as much I can handle… And maybe your legs on my shoulders… From behind and you on top?” His eyes were closed. “Normal. I’m a very easy guy.”
I snorted. Grabbed another rag and cleaned him and myself. He watched me with interest. “Who taught you that?”
I shook my head. “I don’t like jumping up after.” He didn’t say anything. I bit my lower lip nervously, sitting and staring at him. My eyes roamed over him.
“Why are you so nervous, Julie? Did you not get your few seconds we were not broken?”
How did he even remember that?
I laughed lightly. “Did I give you just a little bit, Marcus? It’s just not enough anymore? Too much has happened? The few times I’ve seen you over the past few years are so muddled, and not all of it is happy thoughts.” Tears pooled in my eyes at my own words. Getting to talk to him at last…
He sat up and wrapped his arms around me. “We were never broken, Julie. We will learn to love again… every time… In a new way if we have to. This… is for life. I should be the one that feels that I ruined this by not changing back then. I’m the one that didn’t fight for you. I branded you. I was a coward… Back then, I thought we were fine… I was stupid… Pushing you away… And I had a hard time after Louis and hearing you and Chris… It was tough, Julie.” Tears were pooling in his eyes as well.
I pulled his lips on mine and kissed him deeply. He rubbed off the tears that were running into my mouth. His fingers rake through my hair.
“Julie… You can’t sleep with Soren again… and he can’t brand you….” Marcus was nervous, giving me an ultimatum. His hand was twitchy, stroking my hair. “I can’t handle another… I’m still too jealous…”
I sighed, pulling away from him. My cheeks wet… “Then you have to come home, Marcus. I don’t want to be that girl, but you’re forcing me… If you want me, you have to put in the work….”
It was quiet between us. Me sitting on one side of the bed, him on the other. Backs to each other.
I got up frustrated. Walked to the shower and let it run until it was hot. I got in. Marcus came over. He wasn’t happy. I wasn’t happy. He stepped in behind me and held out his hand, and I handed him the loofah.
***
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