《This Is Where I Want To Be》Soren and Isla
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87. Soren and Isla
Isla
My ear was pushed up against the door of my room. I heard Soren coming home. It was late in the day. Usually, he was already home for dinner time. There was something different in his manner the last few days. There was a knock on my door. The knock I had been waiting for.
It was my mother. Calling me to come and help her with serving dinner. All my days were spent indoors. If it wasn’t for my love of books, I would have gone crazy a while back. Sometimes being stuck in a small space even got to me… Because my father owned the book store behind the supermarket. It was easier for my brother to sneak me the latest novel.
In the last few years, the pool had diminished a little. We had been reading the same books over and over. Before that, Soren did all he could to sneak in memorable… spicy novels for us.
The last few days, he had that glint in his eyes again. The one he lost a few years ago. We were never friends. Women didn’t have friends. Especially not male friends. I did listen to all the stories. Like all the women on the compound did. There was an auction. My father even tried to get him the girl he really wanted. But we just couldn’t outbid Lucius’s father. I felt for Soren. I had wondered what would have happened if he could have married that girl. Maybe things could have been different.
I knew it was for her that the books flowed in. That he sneaked in special DVD’s. He had made it worthwhile getting a few of us in a group to read the same books. I remember he even read every trashy novel and every boring war story or autobiography just to have something to talk to her about.
I knew she had to be back. The girl had caused such a scandal. Not only did she get sold on auction, but they managed to escape the compound. Well… that was the story that went around.
But that night, it was different. There was an energy in the air… a nervousness in the servants and my mom. My father and Soren came home, and then they left suddenly. It was really late when they came back.
No one told me anything. I never really knew what was going on. There were only a few girls left that weren’t married at my age. It would be my seventieth birthday that year. I was born before the harem system took on a whole new meaning. I had been there the last thirty years when this place became a fort. Became an army base and the structures changed.
I go out of my room and greet my father and brother by bowing down. They sat in their chairs. Soren helped me up, releasing me.
He was happy. There was a smile on his face. His eyes fell on our father. They locked gazes until my father nodded. Releasing him to speak to me. Soren told me to sit down. I didn’t talk. Women never spoke.
“Isla, something happened in the whole of Compound tonight.” I didn’t expect much because big news would be… that… No, we never had big news.
“Marcus came back.” My eyes grew bigger. That was big news. He had been gone a long time. Soren had always talked about him. Qadir, the leader’s boy. The one to take over. They had high hopes for him. I still didn’t say anything.
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“Something happened at his house. At Qadir’s house.”
What could it possibly be? My hands were rubbing in anticipation.
“He forced guards to bow down to his wife.”
I gasped. My mouth hung open behind my veil.
“She was molested, and men were in Marcus’s house with her when he came back.” I shudder at the thought. “He gouged out his eyes and broke his arm. He is hanging on a pole outside Qadir’s house.”
It was a little above me. I couldn’t really comprehend the meaning. Men were never allowed close to someone else’s wife. Rape was a serious offense. Cheating was a severe offense… One thing women could at least feel safe about. Not that it didn’t happen after you were married.
My mind was trying to put the puzzle pieces together. In my opinion… Marcus didn’t have a wife. Who would want to go into that house anyway? I had heard that Marcus had gone to the same auction as Soren years ago, but Qadir didn’t even offer one cent.
“The human world out there had taken Qadir into custody a few weeks ago. That’s why Marcus had to come home. But he left her at his house. Qadir didn’t like the fact that Marcus… loves his wife.”
The animation was back in Soren’s eyes. It must be the same girl he was crushing on. He met her again a few days ago. But if she was Marcus’s wife, Why… was he so happy?
“Anyway, Isla, things are going to change on the compound. For women especially. The whole army had moved back… Marcus’s army. I don’t know how but you can go outside. Walk around without a veil, for starters.” Soren ended his talk.
I didn’t know what to think, let alone say anything. My life had a routine. There was structure and safety. Food for the vampires once a month. We didn’t need to go out into the world alone. There was safety in numbers. My father had looked after me for my whole life. He had given me freedom without being cruel. And all I had to do was follow the rules. There weren’t many anyway. Not everyone might feel like that, but I did. I had never wished for change. My mother was an only wife with two kids. She had never been oppressed or beaten. All that was expected was that we were quiet. Not talk. Not go outside and show respect. My father even let me read. I had never written anything, but I didn’t need to. I had no friends. I didn’t talk to any other women.
Soren had never felt like me. He was twenty-eight, nowhere near my age. On numerous occasions, he had tried to pull me into a conversation. Even asking my father to give me leave to talk to him. But I never really felt right in doing it. Getting swept up in his fervor to do something. To go somewhere.
It always felt like he was going shoot up into the air. He was confined and bored. Going to the same place day in day out. When he started working at the bookstore, he even out a little. Had something to live for… but I was sure it wasn’t the books.
“Wouldn’t you want to be able to go outside Isla? Walk with me in the market. Come to a shop and have a drink without having your handheld by your father.”
“Soren, your sister isn’t like you. She is contented and peaceful. Just because she is a woman doesn’t mean she feels oppressed all the time.”
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“What do you mean baba? I’m a man, and I feel oppressed.” My father didn’t indulge him. “Well, there were announcements the whole night long that information meeting would be held in the great hall. Women are allowed to go… if you want to Isla, you can come with me and baba tomorrow?”
I looked at my father. He was gazing at the Tv that was on some channels the compound allowed.
“I would like to go.” My father jumped up. All our heads turned in unison. It was my mother. She was actually saying something. Soren jumped out of his chair. He went over to her, picked her up, swinging her in a circle. And for the first time in a very long time, my mother smiled.
***
Soren
My whole family went to the great hall. There were not many faces so early, but my father wanted to stay in a routine. We needed to be at the bookstore by nine.
Isla was strangely nervous. It was as if she didn’t welcome the change. I was glad that my mother reacted the way she did. It shocked us all. Sometimes I wondered how the women did it. Stayed quiet. Stayed still. Stayed home.
Juliet would never have been able to handle it. No, she never would have to. I was glad Marcus was back. But it did mean that Marcus was probably not undecided anymore. That she really did have two husbands.
The doors were open. I saw Louis in the corner talking to a guard. They were in a serious discussion. But the guard relented, and they came our way. Louis saw me immediately and came over. I introduced him to my family. He extended his hand to my mom. It took a moment, but she shook it. Making eye contact with him and saying “hello.”
The three of us were stunned. Louis smirked and held her hand a little too long. His gaze landed on me. “She thinks I’m attractive.”
My father was immediately indignant. I pushed Louis out of there before he could break down all the progress we had made. And before he could shake Isla’s hand.
Louis was so friendly. The smile on his face drew you in. He was happy. “I got to go, Soren… she woke up. She’s in bad shape. Even worse than when you saw her last time.”
Louis and the guard ran for a car that was already running. They were headed for Marcus’s home.
“It had been my fault. That she was beaten again. When the guard looked at me in the bookstore threatening Juliet to come out of her ability. I was ready to take it for her. I cringed at the fact that she would do that for me… How was any man supposed to show her that they cared?
I sighed, staring after the car. Isla came and tugged on my sleeve. She had done it so many times. Because she never spoke… Frustrated that she had done it so many times.
We sat down on some chairs. There were projectors and screens pulled down. Everything that happened the last two weeks played. After we saw everything, Marcus had said in all his interviews… We didn’t think there could be more. But they soon told us that arrangements were being made for us to go back. Some guard gave us a speech of all the lies Qadir had told everyone.
They said that there would be islands on the outskirts that would be happy to take us in. Where we could acclimate and share what we had learned from Earth. That Marcus was there and would visit and help with any transitions.
***
“Baba, are we going to go back?” I asked as soon as we entered our home.
The four of us were sitting around the TV, my mother anxious for what my father would say. Isla still hadn’t said a word. I was getting more frustrated with her. The bookstore was suddenly forgotten. What would be the point?
“I don’t think there will be novels and entertainment for women there. I don’t think they write stories about love and drama?”
Isla’s hand reached up. We all stared at her. She was asking for permission to speak. In other households, she would have to bow to the floor. My father nodded.
“I would like to go back. It seems that En-gannim is a little bit more relaxed around women. There are no maimings. It doesn’t seem like there are servants or poverty. Everyone has a purpose… I might even be able to get married if that is the case.” The three of us sat staring. I had not heard her voice in a long time. “It seems that talking is up to the father or the husband. It's not like here where we have to stay indoors. Can only go out with a male present.”
“If we wait, we could live among the humans.” I tried to throw out the other side of the coin. No one said anything.
“I want to have a baby, Soren. Here I will have to marry a human that would take the chance…. He will die in a hundred years and then….” She shook her head. “I’m sure there will be reading. Just different. There will be something for women to do. We can go to more information meetings to find out exactly.”
“Enough! I will go every day. Find out everything and then make the decision. That is still how this house works… isn’t it?”
His eyes glanced from Isla to mine. I sighed heavily. Our eyes drifted to my mom. She was quiet. Her eyes were closed her head was leaning back on the couch.
I stood up and touched her arm. I went down on my haunches next to her. She slowly opened her eyes and patted my hand.
“I know, Soren, that you want to stay… but I don’t want you to. Your father and I were born here. I was sold here, and he was good to me. I am one of the lucky ones. You were lucky.” She glanced at my father. “But Soren, I would love to go back home. My parents will not be allowed, and your baba’s parents will stay. But not once had they told us where we came from. Isla is almost seventy… I want to keep moving forward. I had been dreaming of this day. Us going back is not necessarily a bad thing. I think there is a reason the species can’t mix. Forcing ourselves in with the humans… I feel like an outcast.”
My arms wrapped around her neck, and I hugged her. I needed a hug. I also needed a wife. Being there had made me more human. It might not be a good thing. Not all of us can go into a place and feel at home. We haven’t ever felt at home.
When I released her, my father and Isla were staring at us. I had gotten my mom’s even temper. But it didn’t mean we didn’t need to talk about things. And she desperately wanted to speak.
***
Kubra
Louis {Just checking in with everyone. Seems coms are working again. Charlene okay? Carl was at the compound and said you’re looking after her. Thanks btw.}
Kubra {Good to hear. We’re enjoying your Paris home. Safe to go to Washington with Charlene? Or should we stay here?}
Louis {Big developments. Charlene can come to the compound.}
Kubra {Good, we have talked about it a bit... see you in a few days.}
***
“Hey, Charlene. Louis said I can take you to the compound. You still want to go.”
“Yeah I do. That means Juliet is okay. Do you think I could talk to her?”
“Sure. Will find out her number or how you can get a hold of her. I will know more when we are on the compound.”
“Where did you live when you were there?”
“I had a room with Marcus. In his house.”
“Is it nice?”
I bobbed my head. “Really nice. It’s modern. With cement and wood mixed with clean lines and a flat roof. Very LA, actually.”
“Can we stay a few more days? I would like to do all the sightseeing.”
It made me happy that she asked. That she wanted to stay longer. Spend more time with me. Since I told her everything, she had relaxed more around me and I wanted to build on that.
***
I had taken Charlene and Miné everywhere Paris had to offer. We did all the tourist destinations and we were busy the whole day. We were walking back home after some sightseeing. Charlene was looking down at the ground. A little down in the dumps.
“What’s wrong,” I asked?
“I… enjoy doing things with you… but…”
I waited and didn’t say anything…
“But I don’t want to do anything tomorrow.”
I was quiet. She and Juliet were so busy. Always lively. It seemed like she would love not sitting still. “Are you tired? Miné has been sleeping through.”
“No… I’m not tired. I just… want to spend some… more… time with you.”
“What do you mean? I’ve been spending every day with you.”
“We can’t really talk… being out and about… Miné is always with us, and… the only time’s there is… to just relax is when she takes a nap and in the evenings after I put her down.”
Was that code for something? I heard human girls had a lot of things going on… Difficult to understand what they really meant. I was trying my best but I had to take out my phone.
Who would I ask? I messaged Louis.
Kubra {Hey. When a human girl says she wants to stay in and talk and not go out of the house… what is it code for?}
Louis {Charlene? Big eye emoji face.}
Kubra {Yeah}
There was a pause. A minute or two went by.
Louis {During the day when Miné is sleeping, she has about an hour to two where she would run a bath… read a book… means she needs to relax. Time for herself.}
Kubra {And at night? After she puts Miné down. And the talking?}
Louis {She wants to watch her favorite movie… get her favorite take out and ask you a billion questions that you have to answer. Honestly. No matter the time during the day you both are at home. If you haven’t fought by then and the movie is over…}
Louis {ask her to come to sit on your lap… winky face emoji}
What the f…. what does that even mean???
***
Needless to say everything was going so well… I put Miné down for her nap and told Charlene to take a bath. Bought her favorite wine and she had a book on her phone she was reading.
I heard the bath and when she came out she seemed really relaxed in her slacks. The rest of the day I tried to stay close to her… so she could ask me her billion questions. It didn’t take long of me being quiet for her to start talking. She got really excited when I answered her about everything… almost mesmerized listening. We got take out and it went on till Miné went to sleep.
I realized there was a lot she wanted to ask me that she couldn’t in a lineup outside the Eifel tower or in a crowded store.
Although out there, I had more excuses to touch her. Take her out of the way of oncoming traffic or rub against her trying not to bump someone on the bus. Sharing food or drinks. At home, she was on the one side of the room and me on the other.
“What’s your favorite movie. I feel like watching something. Maybe it’s on… I can always stream it through my phone?” She stared at me just coming back from upstairs. Putting Miné down for the night. “Would you like to watch a movie with me… I haven’t done this before… so I will watch what you suggest.”
“You have never watched TV.”
“No! Not that… this… asking a girl to watch a movie.”
She giggled and jumped over the couch. “Yeah… okay.” Didn’t sound very convincing. “I kinda feel like the movie “next.” Saw it was on. I think you’ll like it.” I look for it and found it. I played it and actually did enjoy it. We haven’t fought, and she seemed to have gotten everything she wanted. I watched her more than I watched the screen, though. It wasn’t really late after the credits rolled down.
“And?”
“What?”
She giggled. “I’ve said this before but do you even know that all you have to say is “what”….”
I paused, thinking about it.
“Now that you mention it… again… I suppose.” She was quietly playing with her fingernail. “We haven’t fought today. We haven’t fought at all, come to think about it.”
She looked up from her fingers. “Random… But no… I think we get along.”
“Did you have a good day?” I ventured nervously.
“It was exactly what I needed.”
“So… do you… want to come and sit on my lap?”
At first, she paused and tilted her head. “You obviously want to fight or be pushy.” She was angry… “I thought we talked about this Kubra.” She got up and grabbed her phone. Not looking at me again. I wanted to touch her hand when she walked past me. She pulled it up and out of mine in a jerky movement.
“Hey what’s going on?”
“Seriously Kubra! I don’t want to have sex with you. Is that clear enough?”
The look on my face must have been more clear… that I had no idea when I ever made that suggestion.
She stared down at me for a moment. “Where did you hear what you asked me.” I picked up my phone and gave it to her. She smiled from ear to ear. Like I gave her the holy grail. “How do not know what it means?”
I shrugged… “Messages… Louis…” She scrolled and read it.
I had never seen anyone burst out laughing like that. So much that at one point… She was rolling on the couch.
“I hope this is a good thing.” She nodded. Coughing and trying to catch her breath.
I was falling in love with her. Charlene was beautiful and understanding. Her laugh made me smile. Making her laugh felt good… Seeing her happy made me feel good.
“I think I’m… in love with you, Charlene.”
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