《How To Kill A God: A Fantasy Gamelit Thriller》Forgotten Promises- Chp. 12
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I awoke early, early enough that the sky was still red from the rising sun. A single window allowed a gentle light to filter in. I waited for a moment and didn’t hear any movement throughout the house.
A single picture was laid face down on the nightstand. I lifted it up, curious.
It was a family. Kelia, who looked much younger, happier, was beaming into the camera. She had her arms tenderly wrapped around a man’s next. Four young children filled out the bottom of the picture, each taking a different pose, one looking like he was harassing his sister, another swatting at the annoying brother and one laughing maniacally. Kelia’s family.
I was surprised camera’s existed. I could only imagine it was introduced so early because of those engineers that were brought here. An artificial technological development?
I wondered why she was living all alone now. Did they all end up passing? Or was she divorced? Did the concept of divorce even exist here? If they didn’t have the institution of marriage, then it was plausible that divorce wouldn’t exist.
I lied in bed for a while longer, thinking about her family and my own. I couldn't really even remember a single picture of my brother. Friends often thought that I was an only child.
Feet shuffling. From the sound of it, it was Kelia making her way down the hall. She was opening drawers and cupboards, gathering stuff that must have been for an early morning breakfast.
I suddenly felt that impending sense of social anxiety. Here I was, some random kid, inside this lady’s house. Was she even willing to make me breakfast? I felt too awkward to ask her to and I had no problem making my own but it would be way too weird to just start rummaging through her stuff.
Fuck me. I sucked with people. How was I even able to become friends with Hana? I didn’t have a single clue.
I continued to hide in the bedroom, avoiding all human contact. Amazing how forthcoming I am when I’m essentially on Death’s doorstep.
Kelia’s voice sounded throughout the house. “You want food?”
My heart stopped. Shit. I was going to have to talk to her. I pulled the covers back and stepped out of the bed, finding a pair of slippers near my bed. I put them on and made my way out.
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The smell of eggs greeted me. Odd that it was also considered a breakfast food here. Walking into the kitchen, I saw Kelia working a contraption that seemed similar enough to a stove, one connected to the central plumbing system. Guess she wasn’t rich enough to have it hidden away in the walls like Hana.
“Good morning,” I said awkwardly.
She grunted in response, focused on making whatever it was that she was making.
I didn’t know what to do. Should I offer to help? Sit at the table? Maybe I can-
“Sit at the table.” Her voice, gruff as any I’ve ever heard, convinced me that that was the correct option.
I seated myself at the table. A silence descended over us as she continued to cook, one that I was entirely uncomfortable with and one that she seemed at ease in.
Minutes passed by and my anxiety grew and grew until I had to say something.
“So, you live alone?”
A dumb question. What an idiot I was.
She grunted again in response.
“It’s a nice place. Thank you again for hosting me.”
She turned her shoulders around to look at me with an expression I couldn’t read.
“What did you do? Hana wouldn’t send you here without you doin’ something.” Her eyes narrowed as she spoke.
“Nothing!” I spoke speedily. “It’s a bit of a long story.”
Now she turned around fully, spatula in hand, glinting in the light from a thick coating of oil.
I didn’t know how much to tell her but I figured that since Hana didn’t tell me to keep things secret, the truth was best. While I was in the middle of reciting things, she turned around and continued making breakfast. I had stopped but she ordered me to continue and so I did.
I told her everything, the killer, Zeckmas, the mysterious figures in the window. She didn’t say anything even after I finished, instead sliding a plate of food to me. Surprisingly, it was a traditional English breakfast.
She sat at the table with me, eating some lightly buttered toast, the bread woody and tough. Silence fell upon us again as her and I continued to eat. She was staring off into the distance, lost in thought. I couldn’t stand the fact that the conversation, if you could even call it that, had lulled again so I said what was arguably the stupidest thing I’ve ever said.
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“Your family seemed nice.”
Her eyes instantly locked onto mine, brow furrowed, mouth clamped shut so hard that her lips had formed thin white lines. She slowly set the toast back onto her plate, all the while never breaking eye contact with me. I knew I had fucked up. Fucked up big time.
“The picture was face down for a reason.” There was a threatening tone in her voice, one that betrayed a deep, unresolved anger.
“Oh I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to go snooping around.”
“House rule: you don’t ask about my past under any circumstances. Do you understand?”
“Yes, ma’am,” I said, nodding dumbly.
“Good.” She returned to her toast, munching away, now with an added vigor.
I finished up my breakfast in record time and tried to help clean the dishes but she instead shooed me off into the living room, telling me to ‘go read a book or something.’ So that’s what I did.
I ambled over there, noticing the walls were lined with book after book. Some were massive, some were thin and tiny, many old and worn. I pulled one at random. It had such a fine cover, minimally dressed up with elegant carvings but no title. I flipped it open and read the first paragraph.
The world of magic is a perilous one. Ancient gods, powerful entities, primordial domains, paths of power, reborn ascendants, warring worlds. You, young mage, are now being inducted into this world and must prepare accordingly. It is no trivial undertaking. This is one that must be reflected on deeply, one that requires a dialogue with those far more wise than you, for your very life is at stake now. Do not tread lightly.
It was a paragraph meant to scare people off and yet I felt precisely the opposite. My life already was at stake. In fact, I was at a significant disadvantage as things stood right now. I knew my only option was to find some way that I could learn magic.
Kelia had entered the living room, pulling her own book off the shelf. Curiosity pushed me to ask her a question.
“Do you know I can learn magic?”
She had settled down in a leather chair, that face of annoyance rising up.
“What do you want to learn magic for, kid?”
I thought for a moment before answering, just so I didn’t sound like an idiot. “I’m in a pretty tenuous situation right now. There’s some crazy killer that thinks I’m an important player in his game, I’m familiar with this world, and who knows what else is lying in wait for me. It seems like I need to be able to defend myself in some way, right?”
She snorted at that. “Kid, you would be eaten alive. No way you’re learning magic.”
I bristled a little at that. “I know I’m not the toughest around but I can handle my own.”
She chuckled again, unimpressed and returned to her book. Well, fuck you lady. I’ll figure it out on my own. I was about to turn back to the bookshelf when I noticed her expression changed, almost as if something dawned on her.
“You said you were brought here right?”
I nodded, still annoyed with how weak she thought I was. I could easily hold my own. Hell,
I got mugged on my second day here and I was still kicking.
“Back on your world, were you an only child?”
I was a little bit thrown by the change in questioning. I shook my head.
Her breathing grew heavier. She was now sitting up fully, looking like she was about to leap out of her chair. Maybe the little part about me being unfamiliar with here had finally settled in her mind.
“Second born?”
“Uh, yea, I was the second.” Now I was definitely confused by her.
“Shit.” She stood up from her chair, storming off down the hall. I stretched my head to get a peek around the corner but she was in her room, rummaging through drawers with a driven intensity.
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2/17 NOTICE: I'm putting this on hiatus, possibly permanently. I didn't want to spam with an "update chapter", so hopefully here and in the story blurb will get enough eyeballs. There are a couple reasons for ending SSA for now. 1) I wrote the next chapter but wasn't happy with it. I've been less and less satisfied with SSA's quality the more I thought about it. Part of the reason is... 2) I am seriously thinking about trying to publish some novels to help pay the bills, since I don't have my other source of income anymore. I have never asked for anything from SSA readers, no money, not even a review or rating. SSA is written for fun to amuse myself, primarily, and I would kind of feel bad actually charging someone money for something as unserious as that. I don't think it is good enough to ask anything in return. To use an analogy from music, SSA is more like a jam session with a bunch of friends. You're just chiling and having fun playing some music. I mean, if you are Mozart or even Eminem, your jam session is good enough to sell, but for an amateur beginner like myself, haha, no. If I want to publish something, I feel like I need to go the proper route of practice and rehearsals, which might be more similar to a classical concert performance. With SSA, I work from worldbuilding notes and a loose outline, but what you are essentially getting is the first draft with lots of so-called pantsing. Pushing out a web novel like this also means it is very difficult to go back and improve things without breaking everything else downstream. I wanted to try this "jamming" approach, as it was a good way to teach me about another aspect of writing, but to move forward, I think I need to hone my "classical" techniques, which emphasize rewriting, or at least, revising outlines. 3) While I intend to try to make $$$, my actual current goal is to "get gud". I've spent a lot of time recently trying to understand the self-publishing industry, and I'm pretty sure I can make some money by using short-term strategies with my current amateur skill level. But I've seen too many authors come and go/burnout, and really, the only way that I think I can enjoy writing and still make money on a long-term basis is to become a better writer. And the next step for me, which I haven't done much before, is to spend more time on rewriting and outlines. That is pretty much antithetical to the way SSA is developing. I've always been kind of 20/80 plotting/pantsing, but I want to spend a lot more time outlining before I even start writing. SSA jam sessions don't really fit my goal anymore. If you're curious about what's next, read on... Among other regrets, I regret not finishing SSA. It's the first story I've dropped, but then again, it's the first web novel I've attempted, so I suppose that's not a surprise. 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