When I came to all I could feel was pain. I can’t see, I can’t hear, I can’t even scream properly .

I Never in my 20 years of life have I ever felt pain like this.

The pain it felt like needles are piercing every part of my body.

I don’t know how I can felt it but even insides of my body felt like they were on fire .

Aaaaaaaaaa

After some time of feeling the dreaded pain I got used to it, not entirely but enough to think about the cause of this pain .

And I can’t find any cause in my memory that would lead to this kind of pain .

The main suspect that I could think of is my mother’s food, but even though they are never as good as my grandmother’s it can’t make me feel like death is better than this pain.

After some more time of being a good filial son, I tried to open my 100kg eyelids. And when I did, and all I could see was a set of deep purple pupils in a dark red eyes looking at me with warmth that could even keep you alive in the cold depth of space.

The purple eyes belonged to a woman with a deathly pale face and wound riddled body.

For that moment I forgot everything else, all I could focus on was that beautiful eyes which looked at me with emotions I couldn’'t comprehend. I could see a whole world in those eyes, those eyes remind me somehow of my mother. Only in her had I seen those emotions ever before.

She wore a purple robe with peach blossoms and a intriquit golden dragon on it’s sleeves that seemed to be alive.

Then suddenly “The fuck am I thinking, were am I, who is she, the fuck is going on , why am I so small,". I felt confusion, pain, and ofsmelt blood,. My eyes where going round and round. I felt like I was suffocating,. The world turned dark, and painful.

At that moment all I could think was, "just let me die, and to stop this pain", then I felt something smooth enter me like a small warm stream.

I focused entirely on that steam of warmth not questing what it was,. The pain stopped, the confusion cleared and I could think.

From my 20 years of life something I am proud of is of my ability to focus on something else when you I am feeling pain that seem to make you want to take your on life,. I self taught and masterd this skill through my years of suffering the curse know as migraines.

This was not a dream the pain and those clear eyes said so themselves,. and I am not on my bed, my body is smaller, and what I saw was real so “I think I reincarnated in to a small child “ well that’s … ..

Why am I taking it so well, I feel like I should scram or yell,. Is it because of the steam,? How is this possible, did I die or am I still alive on earth and it’s just my mind,? This can’t be a dream.

I tried to open my eyes once more, and this time it did not feel like a mountain was on me,. The pain was slowly faiding, but the smell of blood was still there, It was little dark, a cave perhaps and I was wrapped in some kind of clothing.

The women cloths does not go well with dark dingy cave, so she probably is not a cave women.

The women and baby me were on the floor the blood was everywhere. There was so much blood. I looked at the women, it took some time because I was not in the same position as I was when I was having my small existential crisis.

I saw her eyes once more they were purple like before but blank, she was not breathing either.

I felt pain once more, not physical pain like before but an emotional one. I can’t see her eyes anymore that reminded me of my mother,. It felt like I would never see her never again, fear took over me. My mother, my brother, my father, and my family I could never see any of them again