《The God Cheese Chase》7. An Extremely Pleasent Trip.
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An Extremely Pleasant Trip.
“Wait, Jobs, what did you do with that other piece of cheese we found?” I finally remembered.
“Oh, that? Beatrix said not to use it so I just locked it up with our other box,” Jobs said.
“So now we got 2 boxes of god cheese.”
“Yes, Captain.”
I sighed. “I see.”
This god damn cheese is just too enticing. If a single bit of the aroma it gives off leaks from the box, we are all dead.
“With two boxes of god cheese comes double the danger,” I said. “We will need to beef up security.”
“Don’t worry Captain. I put it in a very special place,” Jobs laughed.
“I hope it's good enough.”
“It’s a place Beatrix would have trouble getting into.”
“I see…We had something like that on the ship?!”
“Yea, I built it a while ago but never really had a use for it.
“Jobs…I promised I wouldn’t ask what you do all the time, but if you made something as useful as that, please, just tell me.”
“Nope,” Jobs said without a single facial expression.
I blanked.
“Too busy, just go ask Debra,” he said after.
I wanted to say something, but nothing came out.
Eggs patted my back as Jobs left.
“I truly pity you Capt.,” Eggs chuckled.
“I don’t need it.”
“My god, Capt. are you crying?”
“N-no, I just got some tree dust in my eyes.”
“Sure…”
An Awkward silence followed. Everyone just slowly backed away and left to do their own thing.
They just left me on the deck, sulking in shame.
______
“The crew of the Sinclair Jr. has quite a lot of free times on their hands. Long journeys require time, and this time usually leads to countless days, and sometimes even months, of boredom. I, the great lovable Captain Charles Brie, ensures my lovely crew members all have hobbies that they enjoy, and can pursue.
Egg has his garden and brewing.
Jobs has his research.
Rigor has his alchemy and medicine.
Debra…well, Debra’s hobby is just watching Jobs really REALLY intensely.
Beatrix…you know what? I don’t want to know what her hobby is and I sure as hell don’t want to be told what it is either.
Perhaps I realized this too late but why are all the female members of my crew so weird? I mean the only normal one is the last crew member.
Oh right, I forgot to introduce her. She‘s usually extremely quiet.
Every member of my crew I assure can win a fight against any average beasty, except one I guess.
She spends all her time on the ship, reading books. Poor girl shut herself in her own fantasy worlds.
Her name is Inky. I feel Rigor gave her a horrible name after he adopted her. Then again, with a name like Rigor Mortis, I ain't surprised.
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She was the only survivor in Rigor’s town after the plague. Her solitude managed to save her from coming in contact with the deadly virus. Sadly, being the only survivor in an entire town, then being adopted by a ghost-dad, really did a number of her psyche. She seemed to have developed multiple personalities, perhaps from all the books she read.
Most of the time she’s her normal shut-in self. During times of danger, her self-righteous personality comes through. She’s still called herself Inky and is almost the same girl. She just gets a little…suicidal. She would be the first to jump towards an attacking monster but with no skill or weapon what so ever, she usually ends up in trouble. Rigor always had to heal her afterward.
Her second personality probably came from Egg. She acted like a noble and drank afternoon tea with perfect etiquette. Even her vocabulary changed! She would shy from any dangers and faint at the sight of blood. It was completely opposite of her self-righteous personality. I don’t know what triggers this one, but it usually has to do with shame…
Her third personality…well, I fear for my crew when that comes out. Thankfully it only showed up once. She becomes insane, literally just trying to kill everything that moves. We don’t dare to hurt her but for some reason, her frail body becomes a weapon of mass destruction. It’s like she has mastered several martial arts as well as techniques of assassinations. I mean, who the hell taught her all these?! Most of the time, her other three personalities are prevalent which was why I said she wouldn’t be able to fight your average beasty.
Inky is a handful, but Rigor insisted on taking her in this race. Something about worrying her third personality would surface and she would end up a mass murderer. Honestly, I’m worried too. I’m kind of her godfather…totally by accident though. I swear I was drunk at the time.
But with Rigor being a ghost and all, all the legal responsibilities fall on me. If she goes on a bloodthirsty killing spree, and I’m to blame…well, it’s not like I can hide forever.
So with that, we brought Inky with us. She’s hiding in her room full of books. Rigor brings her food and water every once in a while. I begin to feel like he treats this like taking care of a pet instead of a child.
Everyone treats her very nicely. I feel like they just fear her 3rd personality suddenly appearing.
And thus that’s my entire crew.
Melanzana, my first mate.
Jacob, our mechanic and weapons expert.
Rigor Mortis, our resident doctor.
Debra, our engine and navigator.
Beatrix, our trump card.
Inky, our cute little pet.
And lastly me, the magnificent Captain Charles Brie!” I shed one final tear. I finally finished the part of my monolog that introduces my crew.
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“Captain, SHUT UP! Stop shouting, it's night time!” Egg yelled from his window.
Ah, it would seem I didn’t keep track of time.
______
Beatrix stabbed her sword into the soft corroded ground, trying to support her battered body. Her breathing was heavy due to the lack of fresh air. Although Nidhogg’s poison wasn’t strong enough to kill her, it did slowly wore her down.
“Persistent little worm,” She sneered.
The Nidhogg was wounded all over. Toxic blood oozed out of every cut. It was twitching and convulsing on the ground.
“I’m amazed you swallowed that automaton and lived,” Beatrix said. “I had Jacobs hide a secret weapon in it that could nearly kill a god.”
The Nidhogg started to toss and turn violently. It knocked large chunks out of the cave.
“Shit, it’s going to collapse,” Beatrix cursed under her breath.
She quickly picked up her spoils of battle and ran to the root.
“Here goes nothing.”
She quickly jumps into the rapid stream of water flowing through the root.
“Well shit, this is going to be rough.”
The rapids soon knocked her unconscious. But due to her ‘assets’, she managed to stay afloat.
______
Within the All God’s World, the ball of light with hairy legs sticking out of it was watching a monitor.
“Hey, Michael, any decent events happen in the race yet?”
“Only two, your highness.”
“Show them to me.”
The monitor blanked out and two scenes simultaneously appeared. The first one was the onslaught of the serpent, killing a large majority of the racers. The second…was Beatrix’s fight with the Nidhogg.
“Oh ho, it would seem we got an interesting toy this time,” If he had a face, a sinister smile would perhaps be plastered across it by now. “How many were killed by the World Serpent?”
“Around 53.78% sire, a bit less than last time.”
“Ahaha, the survivor rate is higher perhaps due to their skill and luck. They will need both to win.”
“Yes, sire.”
“And this second one…This woman. Who is she?”
“Her name is Beatrix Von Lydia. A heroine from the world of the time goddess Claire. Shall I deal with her?” A sinister glint appeared in Michael’s eye.
“A heroine huh? That would explain her prowess. No matter, even heroes die in this race. Leave her for now, it's entertainment for us later.”
“Yes, sire.”
“Call the gods in charge of Asgard. Tell him to prepare for the arrival of the first batch of racers.”
“Yes, sire.”
“Oh Michael, do give them a reminder that if they fuck up, I will obliterate them and everything they hold dear,” The ball of light suddenly glowed brighter.
“Y-yes, sire.”
Michael slowly backed away and left.
“Ahaha, that Michael is starting to show his rebellious side. I wonder why angels always eventually rebel,” The ball of light sighed.
“Perhaps it’s due to your personality,” A voice appeared from across the room.
A ball of darkness appeared.
“Ah, brother. It’s good to see you could make it.”
“Hmm, you little races do bring much entertainment.”
“So how goes the deal?”
“We have enough god cheese to make enough troops for the upcoming war.”
“Good, good. Those alien bastards won’t know what hit them.”
The two siblings laughed away in their private room.
______
Sitting on the throne of Asgard was Odin, the All-Father. Having traded one of his eyes for wisdom, he thought he was all knowing. He would not have expected that his entire world was just a microscopic speck in a greater universe. His entire delusion of being the top was shattered when the ball of light showed up.
For the first time, his all seeing eye was blinded. Not even Loki could hide forever from his eye but this entity was able to do so in plain sight.
Then there was the aura of worship. He felt as though he had met his maker. He and his two brothers killed the frost giant in order to birth Yggdrasil. Even then, he didn’t feel this sort of might.
It scared him. It really did. All he could do was submit. Thankfully, the deity’s request wasn’t too harsh.
“I will conduct a race through your lands. Prepare some obstacles to block them. Not too impossible, but not too easy either. Also, provide them supplies to finish the race. Other than that, I don’t care how you treat them.”
At least the being wasn’t wantonly going to slaughter them all.
Odin sighed. He hasn't felt this stressed since he saw the foreshadowing of Ragnarok.
“Odin, the racers will be here soon. I hope your side has prepared amply,” A voice suddenly said from the sky.
“It will be,” Odin said with a booming voice. “I shall show them the best of Norse hospitality.”
“Good, I shall tell the Grand God of your accomplishments. Perhaps he may bestow upon you a favor.”
The carrot on the stick. Odin wished he didn’t have to take it but after seeing the might of the deity, he couldn’t resist.
“Yes, I will do my best,” He finally said reluctantly.
A dark cloud loomed over Asgard. Hopefully, it won’t be its final calling card.
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