《The Adventures of Hood: Part 1 - The Book of Portals》Chapter 36: A suggested alternative.

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Clem and Carlisle both turn towards Hy-Jinx, their eyes narrowing with suspicion, indeed slightly confused that one of their captives is trying to help them. Hy-Jinx stands, wide-eyed, in silence now, her eyes flicking backwards and forwards between the two in expectation.

“Go on,” says Carlisle cautiously.

“Before I start, can I just say there is a distinct lack of barbarians here,” Hy-Jinx says, staring accusingly at Hood. Hood looks away, embarrassed. Dozer begins to chuckle to himself.

“Is that some sort of code?” asks Clem suspiciously

Thud!

“No, it’s in reference to a fart joke I made earlier except…anyway the point being there is a distinct lack of barbarians here, but what would happen if there wasn’t? I guess you guys,” Hy-Jinx indicates both factions, “are fighting because the barbarians can’t breach the wall. And I guess that thudding sound is their rather useless attempt to break the outer gate of the bell tower. So my advice to you would be: let them in.”

“Let them in?”

“Yeah, you said yourself: mutual enemies will unite two opposing factions. Let them in. Cry havoc and fall back to the wall. Reds and blues will quickly have to band together and you can therefore move with ease on the wall and through the Inner Fayre. Moreover, you don’t even need to drop your colours until as and when you want to.”

Thud!

“I don’t get it, are you playing us?” Asks Clem suspiciously

“Me? No. It’s pretty simple really. I look at my fate. If the two of you can’t agree upon a plan - and it would seem I only have value if you can get me to the gatehouse - then I have no value. And if I don’t have value then I’d imagine I’m head-first down that hole, along with the rest of them.”

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“She’s got a point,” says Carlisle, twisting his moustache thoughtfully.

“I must say I find this quite ironic.” bursts out Helmet. “You’re about to turn me in for a bounty placed on my head for allegedly letting barbarians into the outer city, by letting barbarians into the inner city. This is outrageous!”

Thud! Creak!

“Nah mate, there’s no irony there. Cos we’re only in this situation in the first place because you let them in. Letting them in further, well I say that’s your fault too…in fact that would be a much easier sell wouldn’t it? ‘Look, look who we found, letting the barbarians into the Inner Fayre, it’s non other than the same gentleman who let them into the Outer Fayre. My goodness! Let us through, we’re taking him up to the gatehouse to answer for his crimes.’ Maybes we even get extra coin for capturing such a wanton felon.” Clem turns back to Hy-Jinx: “Well missy, I like your idea, plays well strategically and plays well to a narrative. What are we waiting for?”

“My lot, any objections?” asks Carlisle to his troops

“Nah, we’re sick of this. I’d happily leave with some cash.”

“Me too.”

“Me three.”

“Me four.”

Again the thudding ceases to occur when expected.

“My lot?” asks Clem

“We’re with you boss, ain’t that right?”

The others nod.

“That’s settled then. Your word?” says Carlisle, holding up an outstretched hand.

“My word,” responds Clem, grasping Carlisle in a firm grip and meeting his gaze.

“Then let’s go.”

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