It was quite a cold day, with sinister gray clouds looming over Nathan’s head, the occasional gust of wind ruffling his hair as it sent the occasional chill down his spine.

‘This place is…’ Nathan pondered as he took in the surroundings. He found himself seated under a massive olive tree, with enough holes in its bark that only the tree itself knew how many eons it had lived for.

This wasn’t any normal tree though, as it stood in the middle of what appeared to be a graveyard. ‘Saint Nicolas Cemetery.’ Nathan’s mind spun as he looked around the vaguely familiar scenery. Standing up from his seat under the tree, he walked down the stone-paved path in search of a certain gravestone.

As he walked closer to his destination, the faint sound of someone weeping could be heard in the otherwise silent graveyard. Absorbed by a strange feeling of purpose, Nathan naturally paid no attention to such a small detail and kept going his way. After walking for a while, the gravestone he was searching for appeared in his line of sight. Surprisingly or not, the soft cries seemed to originate from that place, as a bunch of blurry figures stood silently around the grave.

The people surrounding the tombstone were a mixture of men and women wearing an assortment of black clothes. ‘Quite typical for a funeral,’ thought Nathan as he got closer to them. “Excuse me?” He mumbled quietly, unwilling to interrupt the family’s moment as he reached for a man’s shoulder. And, believe it or not, his hand seemed to faze through the man’s figure.

Flabbergasted, Nathan retracted his outstretched arm and took a closer look at the man before him. He had a robust figure and short black hair, donning a tight suit as most men did. Taking a closer look at the man’s face, Nathan’s eyeballs widened in disbelief. He couldn’t help but wonder how he had missed such a detail earlier.

The man had no face. No eyes, no nose, no mouth, no nothing to help differentiate him from the rest of the crowd. Surprised at this discovery, Nathan glanced at everyone else surrounding the gravestone, and, similar to the man, none of them had any distinct facial features.

‘Then where is the sobbing coming from?’ He pondered while considering his next course of action. Plunging his hand into the man’s abdomen, Nathan discerned it would be possible to faze through the faceless crowd and make it all the way to the front. ‘Here goes nothing,’ thought he and dived into the crowd of people.

Like a ghost, Nathan weaved his way through, quickly making it to the front. Once there, he couldn’t help staring in disbelief at what awaited him. A woman in her mid-thirties was kneeling over the gravestone, two children squeezed in her embrace as teardrops could be seen falling from her pitch-black eyes, and yet, not a single sound escaped her mouth.

On her right side, a little girl with ebony dark hair and a pair of glassy-blue eyes was crying her bowels out as she buried her little chubby face inside the woman’s chest. This was Nathan’s little sister Hannah, who at the time of the incident was no older than four years old. As for the woman embracing her, it was none other than their mother Caroline, Caroline Fuller.

‘Is that me..?’ Nathan lamented as his gaze fell on the little boy on Caroline’s left. The boy’s pitch-black hair and eyes were no different than his mother’s, making it quite clear which of his parent’s genes he had taken after.

Even though Nathan’s memory of that day was quite clear in his head, he couldn’t help having a weird sense of Deja Vu as he looked at the trio.

This was their father’s funeral and at the time, little Nathan was no older than 8 years old. Being the big brother of the family, he remembered clearly how he had steeled his resolve in an attempt to keep the tears from rolling that day.

Having stared at them for a while, his gaze left the trio and finally fell on the white tombstone.

“In memory of Mathias Raycraft, a loving husband, and a caring father. Rest in peace.” Nathan read the carved letters before glancing at the photograph lying next to a burning incense stick. With a gentle smile plastered on his face, Mathias’s light golden hair glistened in the sunlight as he lay comfortably in a rocking chair.

Their father Mathew was no older than 40 years old when he died in a car accident. He had been on his way home from work when another car crashed into him, taking his life away. Sadly, this wasn’t the end of the story. Even though he wasn’t a heavy drinker, at the time of the incident, he hadn’t refused his colleagues’ invitation for a glass of beer.

Long story short, the coroner declared him drunk and so, no reimbursement was given to the family. On the other hand, the other party viciously took advantage of the situation in order to seek reimbursement for themselves.

The first ones to learn of the event were the Raycrafts, who not only didn’t help their family of three when they could, but they even went so far as to turn their backs to them, shutting any and all doors. “Mathias is responsible for that mess. Clean up after yourselves, Fuller.” The words his grandfather had used against his mother on that day clearly resounded in Nathan’s mind.

However, this was only part of the reason why Nathan hated his last name so much. He just couldn’t get over the fact of how big of a hole his father’s absence has left in the family.

In the end, the family was forced to sell their house and empty their bank account; adding in what little help they got from their mother’s side, they had barely paid off the reimbursement.

Nathan’s mind was filled to the brim with awful memories of the past as he looked at Mathew’s photograph. ‘You only left trouble behind, old man…’ He couldn’t help thinking while shutting his eyes for a moment.

The sobbing sounds coming from the trio by his side intensified, drawing his attention away from the grave. “Heh,” Nathan let out a chuckle as he turned his gaze at the cloudy sky.

‘In the end, I did cry, didn’t I?’ He pondered as a teardrop rushed down his cheek. Alas, before it even managed to reach the ground, Nathan’s ghostly figure disappeared from the scene.

~~~

The scenes didn’t end there, as another one followed suit. This time, Nathan found himself inside the kitchen of a two-storey apartment. It was a sunny morning, and a family consisting of six members was having breakfast around the table.

Looking at each and every one of them from the room’s corner, Nathan quickly recalled the day’s events. Among the six figures, three consisted of his mother Caroline, his sister Hannah and Nathan himself. As for the other three, they were his stepdad James Strider and his kids, Carl and Martha.

Nathan was only thirteen at the time. After their father passed away, their mother had remarried only a year later to a man named James Strider, father of two and a real asshole. He didn’t blame his mom for that though; having lived the housewife’s part for too long, it was impossible for her to get any decent job. And, without a roof to cover their heads, she had to find a way to feed the kids.

James, who was also a widower at the time, approached her and offered to let them a place to stay. The first few months were fine; there was enough space for all of them and James took care of them as he promised. However, taking care of six people turned out to be much harder than he originally thought it would be.

Being the single working adult of the family, James wasn’t really happy with the hole in his finances. The end result? He would occasionally put the blame on Nathan and his sister, calling them names such as baggage and deadweight from time to time.

On the other hand, Carl and Martha were the real tyrants. Nathan couldn’t remember a single day going by without his step-siblings' harassment. Even that morning was one such day. Carl had been throwing cereal at Hannah, and yet their parents showed no signs of interfering.

“Mom! Carl is throwing cereal at me!” Unable to take it in any more than that, Hannah pleaded for her mother to intervene. Yet, her pleas fell on deaf ears as James answered.

“Carl, did you throw cereal at your sister?” and to that, a playful grin emerged on Carl’s round little face. “No, dad! She is lying!” Other than a blind man, even an idiot could see which of them was the lying brat; After all, cereal was all over Hannah’s clothes.

‘What a shity day that was…’ Nathan thought as his figure disappeared from the scene.

~~~

“Are you really leaving?” Hannah asked Nathan with a trembling voice as he put a pair of sneakers on. Even though he had his back to her, Nathan could picture Hannah’s teary eyes staring right through him. “Mhm,” he mumbled in confirmation, tying his lashes harder than he should.

Resting his back against the nearby wall, Nathan observed his sister’s figure who was no older than fourteen that year. Her hair was long, straight and black as the night, reaching all the way to her shoulders. Taking after her mother’s beauty, she only had their father’s glassy blue eyes to show off.

“Then... Please take me with you! I promise I’ll be a good girl.” She begged through muffled tears, unwilling to let him go. Nathan had just turned eighteen that year and was now officially considered an adult by society’s terms. Using the scholarship he earned at Oakwell Uni as a foothold, he had been planning to leave for someplace closer to it since quite a while ago.

‘No, that was just an excuse I used to escape that hellhole, wasn’t it?’ Ghost Nathan pondered as he sadly stared at the scene playing before his eyes. “Sorry, Hannah. You know I can’t take you with me.” Nathan answered with a massive lump stuck in his throat before slowly getting back on his feet.

Hannah rushed to embrace him from behind, and Nathan could feel her pair of tiny hands wrapping around him as she mumbled. “Please, don’t leave me alone.” Her pleading voice could send almost any man on his knees, and Nathan was no exception to this. But he had to stay strong, he had to escape that hellhole, or else he could never start living.

“Sorry,” he mumbled as he lightly shook off his sister’s arms from around his waist. His future was already bleak and clouded, having an extra person to take care of seemed way out of Nathan’’s capability at the time. “I promise, I’ll come back for you.” He added to assure her, but Hannah was having none of that. “Last time you promised that you would protect me! And that things would get better, and, and…” She screamed and shouted but her pleas fell on deaf ears. “Sorry.” With nothing better left to say, Nathan slammed the door behind him and left without turning back.

*Bam!*

Hannah was the only one left inside the scene, crying her bowels out as she slowly collapsed on the floor. ‘Thinking back on this, I am a real asshole aren’t I?’ Nathan lamented as he moved to sit down next to his sister. “Even though you probably can’t hear me…” He started and then turned to take a glance of his crybaby of a sister. “I am sorry, I really am.”

The two sat there in silence for a while, making Nathan wonder. ‘This can’t be part of my memory; after all, I wasn’t there at the time… Or is this just what my mind wants to show me?’

By now, his sister had somewhat calmed down, mumbling something amidst her sniffles. “Hm?” Nathan moved closer to her mouth, intent on hearing what she had to say.

“How are you any different from the Raycrafts?” The words stabbed through Nathan’s heart like a hot knife passing through butter. His eyes opened widely at the words, but had no time to reflect on them as the scene shattered and he was once again hurled into darkness.