《A Zombie's heart (BL) - HIATUS》Chapter 1
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(Author's note: The first three chapters can be considered as an introduction to the story)
Sam’s POV
It all has started when the doorbell rang; I was sleeping in my new fluffy bed and having the best sleep ever when an annoying sound kept ringing in my ears. For a moment there, I didn’t know if it was a dream or reality until my eyes opened slowly and wandered around the room for a moment, the sound rang again and I recognized it as my doorbell.
While I was rolling out of the bed and standing up, I wondered for a second who might that be, I have recently moved to this new city to attend college, and I hardly knew anybody in this city, I shook off all the thoughts when I reached the door and opened it, and I wish I never did.
A tall, blonde and handsome man was standing there with a gentle smile on his face; I was just about to ask the man something like ‘Who the hell are you? What the fuck do you want?’ (Yeah, I know, I can be really rude if you wake me up) but my voice stuck in my throat when I felt a stinging pain in my heart, the pain became unbearable as it spread through my whole body.
I tilted my head down and looked at the cause of this pain, a small piece of what looked like a stake made of rock stabbed the middle of my heart, my vision started to blur and as I fell to my knees, the last things I saw were the terrified look on the handsome man’s blue eyes and the color of the sun was changing to dark blue, before everything turned black and I lost consciousness.
I woke up on loud screams, in fact, not just screams, I could hear shouting, crying, car horns and I could even swear that I heard gunshots, there were also some strange noises I have never heard before, they were similar to grunts and growls, maybe from some kind of animals which was weird considering the fact that I live in a city.
My head was heavy for some reason, so much heavy that I couldn’t focus on anything, I have tried to open my eyes but they refused to obey, nevertheless, I kept trying for a minute or two until I finally managed to open them a little.
With blurry eyes and a fuzzy mind, I saw my front door in front of me and I was still lying on the floor on my back, it was already dark outside, which meant that I have been lying on the corridor’s floor next to my half-opened front door for almost twelve hours or so, all of a sudden, I felt anger raging in me, how come nobody checked on me or even called an ambulance?
Another high-pitched scream thundered through the night, which made me even madder, all my thoughts became focused on the annoying screams and shouts and how angry they were making me feel, I just wanted them to stop.
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After a few failed attempts to stand up, I finally managed to clamber back to my feet. With my shaky legs and trembling body, I started to walk towards the parapet to take a look at the street.
The first thing I saw was a woman, she was sitting on the street about ten meters away from my apartment’s building, she was screaming and shouting for help, she was kicking with her leg what looked like a drunk man with dirty clothes and messy hair who was grabbing her other leg tightly and biting it, her voice was too damn loud and pierced through my ears like daggers.
For some strange reason, the thought of me helping her never crossed my mind. Like I said before, all I could think of was that her screams and shouts were annoying and making me fucking angry, and most importantly, I wanted them to stop.
The building I lived in was a one-story building consisted of six apartments aligned next to each other in a long line, all the apartments’ front doors open onto a long half-open corridor, with the stairs to exit the building stationed in the middle of the corridor, I lived in the last apartment to the left.
My body was swaying slightly, so I walked slowly in the corridor toward the building’s exit and made my way to her, step by step, with each step I took toward her the hungrier and angrier I felt. When I managed to reach her I had only one thought in my mind, to kill and eat her, so without any delay, I leaned down with my hands on both sides of her head and snapped her neck, ‘Oh, she finally stopped screaming’ I thought before taking a mouthful of her flesh into my mouth and ate it.
I wonder how many years has it been since the blue sun first appeared? Ten or maybe fifteen? As the saying goes ‘Ignorance is a blessing’, it may be better not to know for how long I have been suffering from all the anger, pain, sadness and loneliness.
I closed my eyes as a tear made its way to my cheek, carrying with it some of the pain from my dead heart. What a strange thing to happen, can you imagine a crying zombie? Yup, that’s me, well, let me introduce myself, my name is Sam and I’m nineteen years old or was nineteen years old when I died, but most importantly, I’m a fucking zombie.
For the first few years of being a zombie, all I could feel was a burning rage and the need to kill every human I laid my eyes on, all rational thoughts were gone; it didn’t matter how many I killed or for what reason, I just killed them all.
Little by little my mind began to clear and I started to feel some other emotions, sadly though, they were all bad emotions like sadness or regret.
Anyhow, since I could somehow control myself a little, I decided to lock myself in some abandoned building to sort out my thoughts and emotions, and that is how I spent the next few years, just sitting alone struggling mentally and emotionally, until one day I managed to have full control over myself or so I thought, so I left the building and went outside.
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The first thing I decided to do was to meet some other zombies, in hope that I can talk with them or something, so for the last few years all I did was trying, and the keyword here is ‘trying’ since all my attempts were for nothing, well, not really nothing because every time I tried I felt angry and ended up killing the zombie, maybe I cleaned half of the city’s zombies before I managed to really have full control over my anger and didn’t kill the rest of them.
During that period, I discovered a few things, first and most importantly, I’m somehow different than other zombies, I can talk, think clearly and look more human than the rest of them (although my skin is pale and my irises are red) not to mention the fact that I’m faster and stronger than them and have many abilities.
The other zombies can think like angry one-year-old kids, hardly talk a word or two after a few days of trying, only advanced zombies who usually have abilities can think and talk a little better (like two or three years old kids), so I gave up on talking with them. Some of the zombies have one or two abilities which I guessed helped in speeding their evolution.
The second thing I discovered was that, on the day of the blue sun which also happened to be the start of the apocalypse, some shards fell from the sky into the earth and most likely were the cause of the zombie virus or that is what a doctor’s old journal which I found said, unfortunately, they never had the chance to verify any of it because during the first week everything was gone, no government, no military, nothing.
And guess what, I was the lucky one to receive a direct hit from a shard into my fucking heart, which I concluded was the reason for me being different and all of my troubles.
The third thing I discovered was, there are humans still alive. For the past week, I have been watching them from a distance, there are now about twenty men left, with guns, knives and some of them have abilities.
I guess the virus also changed some of the humans’ DNA but not enough to turn them to zombies, which made it easier for them to survive in this missed up world, I think they came to search for food and other supplies since the city is safer after I killed half of the zombies population, they should give me a reward of some sort, just kidding.
Seeing these humans made me realize how lonely and miserable I’m, I don’t belong in either side, the humans or the zombies, how long can I keep going on like this? The worst thing about being a zombie is that your emotions are heightened, so much stronger than normal humans, to the point that it can consume you.
And so, here I’m now, standing on an old building’s rooftop, with one thought and only one thought in my mind, I need it to stop, just like what happened in the first day of being a zombie, same strong sensation that consumed me and I couldn't think of anything else. I need it to stop, all these emotions and feelings, all the regret and suffering, loneliness and sadness, I need it all to stop, I need my life to stop.
As I looked at the pale skin of my hands, one last tear fell down from my eyes, I climbed down the stairs and walked out of the building, I changed my clothes to some old rags which I took from an unlucky corps, and put some dirt and old blood on my face and hands, I even made my hair messy and dirty ‘Now I look like any other zombie’, I thought to myself as I made my way to where the humans were.
I walked for a few minutes until I was only a hundred meters away or so from them, I halted my steps and closed my eyes and tried to remove this stupid idea from my mind but unfortunately for me, it was too late, the thought totally consumed my mind and took with it all other thoughts, yup, I needed it to stop.
I turned the corner and saw the men were talking to each other in a low voice while trying to open an old store’s door without alerting the zombies, I started to wobble while walking and stretched my hands in front of me as if I was trying to catch them, I made some grunts and growls voices to catch the humans attention.
one of the humans looked at me and pointed his gun toward me with a shaking hand, he moved his other hand through his hair in frustration and hesitated for a moment, which made me furrowed my eyebrows, for some reason he had a very sad look in his blue eyes. When he pulled the trigger, I could swear that I saw a tear made its way to his cheek.
Suddenly, an old memory came to my mind ‘Oh, he is the same handsome man, I wonder who he was’ I wondered to myself. A faint smile decorated my lips for the first time since the blue sun shone in this world as the bullet hit me in the head and everything turned black one last time.
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