I was being stupid, I admit that much. Well, not exactly stupid, but selfish.

Everything I ever do is for a selfish cause: to better myself, to become stronger, whatever.

Such a mindless pursuit was idiotic now that I looked at it. But that didn’t mean it was incorrect. A person who can be devoted to any craft is destined to be selfish at some point. Martial arts and fighting was a selfish activity. So was reading.

Yet, she had a point. Like how there were better ways to solve this predicament other than simply getting disqualified, there were also better ways to become stronger.

But I didn’t like the way she worded it. She had nothing to be sorry about because she wasn’t wrong about everything, and I wasn’t right about everything, so why did she say she was sorry?

Sure, I clowned on her and treated her like an idiot, but everyone in my eyes is an idiot.

I was so shortsighted and caught up in the moment that I needed someone to remind me of other alternatives. Instead of being sorry, it should be me who apologizes.

But apologies are weird. I won’t do them if I don’t need to. At least not verbally. It was stupid to say one thing and mean something else. But that was how society evolved, being as two-faced as it was. They were creations bounded by fake thoughts, a mere pleasantry. What ought to happen and what is said to happen are two absolutely different things. Sins are not atoned by mere repentance, but action as well. I may be a hypocrite in certain definitions, I stand my ground on this.

‘I guess it’s not a bad idea to have Sam as a friend.’

I was seriously considering it now. Who said friends needed to have a similar intelligence wavelength as each other? A dog was man’s best friend, right? But I should probably treat her better than a dog if I were to be completely honest. The issue was, how do I go about such a change? If I compare Sam to that person I almost considered a friend, they were two fundamentally different people who yielded two fundamentally different relationships.

I guess it’s about time for me to tackle the philosophical question of what makes a good friend.

If I were to suppose the relationship I had with that bastard was considered one of a “good friend,” then I can extract the qualities of that relationship and replicate it with Sam.

Let’s see…

He was a martial arts enthusiast who practiced every day… I guess Sam was a sword enthusiast who practiced every day too so I can check that off the box.

We used to beat each other up… Hmm, Sam can beat me up one-sidedly so I’ll have to attend to that box.

As for philosophical or logical discourse? Well, that was never going to happen between Sam and me. It wasn’t a question of how, Sam just wasn’t that kind of person who’d engage in serious intellectual conversations.

And that person was considered by many a virtuous and benevolent person who helped others in need. But I personally knew that was far from the truth. For that guy in particular, there was nothing of the sort in his mind. Black and white did not exist for him, though he acknowledged the general herd mentality.

As for Sam… I guess she can be called benevolent? Not too sure about that just yet.

Then there was also—no what am I doing? Approaching relationships like a mathematical proof is probably not how it should be done. In the first place, relationships were supposed to be emotional things, not logical.

And here I am using logic to convince myself that logic was bad. What level of mind-fuckery is this?

If I reminisce a bit, I think I can say that we had a certain connection with each other: that person and I.

No, I’m being stupid again. The culture of this world and that world are different. The concept of friendship will naturally change as well. I guess I can’t rely on past relationships for this ordeal, though that guy could hardly be considered a friend. He’s dead to me.

‘Did I even have friends?’

For certain reasons, I don’t want to think about it. My memories of that world should stay in that world.

Anyway, was Melissa in this building?

I think I remembered her pointing in the general direction that was here, but I can’t be too sure.

Sam didn’t follow me like she usually did.

Everyone needs alone-time no matter how outgoing the person was, so I let her have her time as I took on this mission alone.

“Did you hear that? Check behind that corner.” The voice alerted me to move away.

I found myself climbing to the ceiling using the distance between a pillar and the wall as leverage to lodge my body. It was a basic parkour stunt that wasn’t hard to do as long as you had leg flexibility and sufficient strength.

“She’s not hiding over here,” said the plump student, waddling his way back to whence he came.

That sentence pretty much confirmed my suspicion which was backed up by the fact that these students were on guard. Melissa was hiding somewhere in this building. The building also happened to be connected by three other buildings through sky bridges which would make it oh-so-convenient for me.

I glanced at my watch, finding that only half an hour had passed. It would take another half hour till the exam would end.

Now if I really think about it, with the context of this exam being to find and collect 100 coins, Melissa probably has the coins. Outside of that, I can’t see any reason why so many students were after her—even those in different teams were operating together with the entire group. Under normal circumstances, the different teams should be competing against each other.

Considering human nature, once Melissa was found or she gave up the coins, the entire group would probably break back into factions. That said, it would also be pretty easy to antagonize all of the students here for an eternity in school years. It’s best to avoid that.

The best course of action would be to divert their attention from Melissa by giving up the coins then secretly stealing them back without being caught. A lord of the flies situation should consume them with each team blaming the other for stealing the coins when it was really me.

But getting coins wasn't the real goal of this exam. At least, it didn’t make sense logically.

If the only reward that could be gained from this exam was a recommendation into the Combative Squadron, collecting coins was the furthest from combat. It was the equivalent of becoming a fast-food worker after graduating college with a PhD in literature. Would anyone in their right mind apply for a run-of-the-mill job after committing years into academia? Similarly, how can collecting coins represent someone’s combat ability? Based on the name of Eigenvalue’s club alone, it sounded like “combat” would be a heavy part of it.

So I can conclude with decent confidence that there was more to this exam than that, even if it weren’t graded. If I want to help Melissa become a member for Sam’s sake, I’ll also have to get her to display her combat abilities. I was almost certain that the Professors and basically anyone else like Scarlet or that elf woman were watching us. If magic could exist, anything beyond my knowledge could exist as well.

That said…

If I were an idiot, where would I hide?