《Mizuki's Sky》49: Loving
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When Sora arrived to pick up Mizuki after work, they both let out a sigh of relief, and then laughed a little.
Sora bent to kiss her and asked, "Are you okay? How was it?"
"Normal, tiring, and I'm exhausted," Mizuki replied as she cuddled into him.
"I almost got left with the baby, but your father invited me to go to the bar and start learning the basics of his job," he told her.
"How was it?" she asked with interest. "He never lets me go there."
Sora brushed her hair back gently and replied ruefully, "Because you're too young."
Mizuki glared up at him and demanded, "Give it a rest Sora, I'm getting older as fast as I can!"
He laughed and bent for another kiss. "I know. I love you. Keep up the good work for the next eighty years, okay?"
"I'll try," she agreed . "So… How was it?"
"Surprisingly similar in some ways to being a waiter, completely different in others, and kind of noisy," he informed her affectionately as he held open the door..
On the way home Mizuki admitted, "I got called in to talk to the manager, after I put in for the time off for the therapy appointment."
"And?" Sora asked after a moment.
"I think he thinks I'm quitting at the end of break because I'm pregnant," she complained indignantly. "But I didn't realize it until he was finished, and then I didn't know how to tell him I'm not."
"You don't know that you're not," he pointed out uncomfortably.
Mizuki looked at him with a startled expression and then blushed. "I'm sorry," she apologized after a minute.
Sora demanded with exasperation, "Never ask me to try knocking you up again Mizuki, if you're going to apologize afterwards."
"But you don't want kids yet and I won't know for sure for a few weeks yet," she protested.
"I already accepted that you might get pregnant when I agreed to do it," Sora replied calmly. "I admit, I'm hoping you don't and we can wait a few years, but it's fine. You don't have to apologize to me Mizuki."
Mizuki blurted, "I love you so much Sora."
He grinned and replied, "Good, because I plan to stick to you annoyingly."
After a minute Mizuki asked in a subdued tone, "Because I was wrong about being able to protect myself?"
Sora glanced at her and asked, "Should I pull over or can you wait until we get there to talk about this?"
"I can wait," she assured him quickly.
When they pulled up outside the apartment a few minutes later he released his seatbelt, turned to her, and asked, "Want to talk inside or in the car?"
"In the car?" Mizuki replied hesitantly.
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Sora held out his arms and Mizuki scooted across the gap. He cuddled her against his chest before admitting, "I am scared because you couldn't protect yourself, and I couldn't protect you. I can't swear that I won't be overprotective for a while, maybe forever. I don't know, but I'll try not to be."
Mizuki buried her face in his shoulder, and admitted in a muffled voice, "I was scared every time someone walked up behind me today."
"You could just stop going to work sooner," Sora suggested. "What can they do, fire you for quitting?"
"I don't want to stop because I'm scared Sora," Mizuki protested.
He smiled wryly. "I just want you to feel safe and happy," he told her firmly.
"Me too. But I think it's going to take awhile," Mizuki admitted.
"I know. Don't worry about it too much, okay?" Sora requested. Even though he had been distracted for most of the evening, he couldn't help feeling anxious again, but he didn't want her to feel anxious.
"I'll try," she agreed.
He kissed her for a minute, before suggesting, "Let's go in and I'll rub your feet?"
Mizuki smiled and nodded.
--
That night Mizuki somewhat reluctantly informed the rest of her family about the incident. She spoke as though she were reporting a traffic accident. Although she did assure them that she already had the therapy appointment scheduled.
Sora was surprised that the children were included in the discussion at first, but when he stopped to think about it, hiding it would surely have been worse. They shouldn't be taught to hide the fact that someone hurt them.
--
The next day, Mizuki and Sora returned from the therapy appointment angry, but not with each other.
Minori asked anxiously, "What happened?"
Sora replied angrily, "They kept asking things in a way that implied Mizuki should take responsibility for being attacked!"
"They?" Shizune questioned.
"They assigned us two therapists because we went in together, and they demanded that we start out separated," Mizuki explained.
"The one I had mostly asked normal stuff while we were alone," Sora admitted more calmly after a moment.
Mizuki grumped, "Mine was being kind of a jerk the whole time I felt like. Asked me mostly about what our relationship had been like while we were dating last year. Then she wanted to know if Sora has been pressuring me into sex! And she kept demanding I give her details!"
Minori replied hesitantly, "It doesn't sound like it was very helpful?"
Sora sighed, ran a hand through his hair, and admitted, "I don't know. Maybe they meant well, or this is helpful for other people, but I feel like they were just poking at her."
Shizune suggested hesitantly, "Maybe they felt like you weren't being open with them Mizuki? And were asking about a variety of things, trying to get you started on one?"
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Mizuki glared at her sister for a moment, but then covered her face and shrugged.
Sora replied unhappily, "I don't know how Mizuki's private session was, but when they spoke to us together, I really felt like they were either trying to make her cry or piss her off."
"We only stayed for the whole thing so that they wouldn't give me another mandatory appointment," Mizuki added as she dropped her hands. She still looked angry.
"You could schedule one with someone else, even if it isn't mandatory," Shizune pointed out.
Mizuki flopped down at the table and asked plaintively, "Can't I just talk to my sister who took a bunch of psychology courses for some weird reason?"
Shizune pointed out nervously, "I just took those because I was trying to decide if I wanted to get a degree to work in child care instead of sticking with the tea shop."
Mizuki laid her head on the table, and muttered less forcefully, "Can I just consider it if I can't get over being scared and jumpy in a few weeks?"
Sora rubbed her back and assured her, "That's fine with me."
Minori agreed, "As long as you do try it again if you're not getting over it Mizuki."
"Okay," she agreed, and closed her eyes and soaked up Sora's petting for a little bit.
After awhile she asked, "Where are to-san, Shinichi-san, and the boys"
"Jun took the boys to the park a while ago, since he has the day off," Minori replied.
Shizune added, "Shinichi is out looking at houses."
Mizuki sat up and asked questioningly, "Without you?"
Shizune blushed as she admitted, "I threw up after the third one that we visited yesterday, so Shinichi decided that it's too hard on me to see them all and that he'll sort out the best ones and arrange for me to see only those later."
"Are you healthy?" Mizuki asked worriedly.
"I'm fine, I tried to tell Shinichi I'm fine too," Shizune assured her quickly. "There was just an awful smell outside that one, and sometimes strong smells or tastes make me throw up right now."
--
Later, cuddled up in Sora's arms on her bed, Mizuki blurted suddenly, "We forgot about combining our accounts. To-san had the whole day off too."
"It's okay Mizuki," Sora said reassuringly, and petted her gently.
"You've been petting me a lot," she observed quietly.
"Do you not like it?" he asked.
"I love it Sora, but you're going to spoil me, and I'll complain that you never pet me anymore later," she informed him as she flattened herself against him.
He coaxed her up far enough to kiss again, and then told her uncertainly, "I'm glad that you like it, but I think maybe I've been doing it so much because it reassures me that you're safe beside me?"
Mizuki kissed him gently before replying thoughtfully, "No one ever talks about rape much in the first place, but other than in movies and stories where the men just get angry that someone touched their woman, I don't think I've ever heard anything about how the woman's partner deals with it?"
Sora assured her, "I'm plenty angry that someone touched my woman Mizuki. It would have caused other problems, but I'd have been happy to have heard that I killed him when I threw him into that sink."
She pushed herself upright and stared at him for a minute.
He covered his face with his arm and said, "I'm sorry."
Mizuki laughed and he dropped his arm and gazed at her in surprise as she assured him firmly, "Sora, I'm glad you didn't kill him, so that we don't have to deal with even more right now." She blushed as she admitted guiltily, "But it makes me feel really good that you feel that way. I think I like you being possessive of me."
Sora abruptly pulled her back down beside him and kissed her hard. "I've been trying to be gentle, but I really want to right now," he told her quietly.
"Do me Sora," she agreed compliantly. Looking back, she felt confident that he would always ask, and never attack her without warning. Even during the most distressing and embarrassing of their intimate moments, she had felt safe.
--
Mizuki cried out, and clapped her hands over her own mouth. Sora gently pried her hands off her mouth and kissed her until she moaned again.
He laughed and suggested, "If you can't hold it in, you could bite me next time instead of covering your mouth?"
"But you said you don't like mixing pleasure and pain," Mizuki objected. "I've been careful not to bite or claw you Sora," she informed him. He gazed at her with such a startled expression that she laughed and asked with embarrassment, "Is that not what you meant?"
"I also meant things like that," he swiftly assured her. "But not completely? As long as you're not drawing blood or leaving wounds it's probably fine."
A little shyly she bit him lightly and asked, "Like this?"
"Yes, that's fine, or even a little harder," he replied.
After a few moments of enduring her tentative experiments he rolled onto his back. "Come here," he demanded.
Because she was playing around, it took awhile. Afterward Sora told her, "I adore you so much."
Mizuki smiled smugly as she cuddled down against him to sleep.
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