The transfer ended, and now I found myself in a new body, with a new couple who seem to be my parents in this new life.

(sigh)

this is the part I hate the most about my reincarnations, having to go through being a baby again and again it’s quite tiring, I wish I could just fast forward to a couple of years in the future.

Well, enough about that, I have no idea where I reincarnated to this time since I selected the random world option, I honestly wanted to join “them” and stop my cycle after my second life but they begged and pleaded me to live, now I have to live my third life while carrying this burden on my shoulders.

Shit, I feel like crying every time I remember that carnage, I should have been stronger, I should have found a way to help them scape instead of immersing myself in the joy of that battle, and I should … have kept “THEM” alive longer to make them feel the pain that I am feeling right now.

The worst thing about it is ... knowing that ... everything was the result of my own actions, the annihilation of my wives, my sons and daughters is not to be blame on them who did the act, but me who incited them to do it.

I had lost track of what was happening around me while I was immersed in my inner thoughts, which were interrupted by a sudden spank in my rear *whack*.

{Oh shit! Fuck! who did that? Old lady what the hell is your problem? couldn’t you go a little easier on a new born baby for god’s sake.}

if someone saw the current scene knowing my past, it would be hilarious for them, the only thing coming out of my mouth was a bunch of mumbles, of course babies can’t talk and I am not an exception for that rule.

{guuu! gaga! Googu!}

Sigh! I wonder what’s waiting for me in the future.

*Little did I know, that my third like would be filled with some many events*

#

{First *cough* a couple of parents who turn *cough* from loving to abusive from not being able to handle the stress *cough* in their lives, thinking that I *cough* would be able to live a normal life, I laid low and accepted *cough* my life with my new “family”, but *cough* what’s this bullshit that I am going through right now!}

In front of me are only 2 colors as far as the eyes can see, this two are red and black. The red from the flames engulfing everything in their path, as if they were trying to quench their immense hunger with everything including living and non-living things alike

The black from the remainings of the things that were used to feed those flames, ofcourse those include non-living and living alike.

Me? Right now, am walking without a goal, the smoke, the heat, the screams and yells of the people dying surrounds me from every side.

My parents? Well, they already became part of the flames is one way of putting it. The weird thing is that I am kind of satisfy with the outcome of my third life, now when I die, I can finally see them again, I can tell them that I tried to keep my promise and tried to live but I die in this massive fire.

From a moment to another, the voices that surrounded me while saying “help me” and “save me” disappeared, the burned and charred black hands that were trying to reach me were no more, and even my own senses where leaving me now.

But I still kept walking forward, I couldn’t hear anything, I couldn’t smell a thing, the taste of smoke in the air no longer filled my mouth, as I fell to the floor, the high temperature of the flames started to disappear, and the pain from the burns in my body started to leave with them. At last, the only one of my five senses left within me, my sight, started leaving.

The red sky started to darken, finally I thought, Finally! I started thinking with tears running down my eyes, I am finally able to reunite with them in the afterlife only having to wait 7 years after reincarnating. After a second or two, my vision left me and I found myself in complete darkness, but that didn’t last long either.

My vision returned first, and I saw a man kneeling next to me with tears running down his cheeks. Then my mouth was hit by the taste of the smoke in the air, followed by the smell and heat of everything around me, the last thing that came back to me was my hearing.

{You’re alive, thank god, you’re alive, you’re alive!}

This man in front of me had an expression I could barely describe, I got confused for a second and thought he saved himself instead of me, but after the confusion left, all that was left was an incredible grief. As the man hugged me, lifted me up and started to carry me somewhere, I started to drift off while thinking, “why? Why did he have to rescue me? Out of all the people whithin this fire,why me? Is he the devil? Is this my hell? Just let me die and be with them, that's my one and only wish.

#

I opened my eyes and found myself in a white room, there was nothing in it besides me, there was only pure emptiness everywhere. But after blinking once, I was suddenly surrounded by dozens of people, some looked young, other looked older, some males, but the majority were females, and to me they were not strangers either.

{ah! I see, so I did die. I was finally able to reunite with all of you again in the afterlife}. they all had smiles in their faces when they saw me, all different types of loving smiles directed towards their husband and others towards their father. {I am sorry for the guy who tried to save me but I am glad he wasn’t able to}.

As I smile and finished my sentence, their smiles disappeared, some had a face full of regret, others had a face full of anger, and others just started crying their eyes out with a face full of sadness. When I was about to tell them not to worry about it, four of them moved towards me and stood in front of me, before I could move or even say a word, my cheeks were struck four times, one time each which left me in confusion and in pain, they’ve always know how to slap, it doesn’t really hurt but stings, which is worst.

{So, this is how you ended up after that, even though you promised us that you would survive and live for us}, said the girl with dragon wings and scales all over her body.

{If this is how you are going to end up, then I don’t mind you dying, but be sure to know that even in the afterlife I will never look at you in the face again}, said the girl with the lower half of a spider and the upper half of a human.

{If this is what you’ve become after a loss then you are not the man I fell in love with, he was a brave man full of love for both us and battles, I never fell in love with a coward like you who wants to scape his burden}, said the tall girl with a muscular body and her two legs resembling a bull’s.

{You’ve avenged us already and that was enough, so why are you trying to make our efforts to keep you, our most loved person alive a fruitless one?} asked the girl with bat wings in her lower half and a tail that had a heart shape at its end.

{Because you all died because of me, because of my lack of strength, because of my lust for battle, everything ended like this because of me.}

{NO!} One of them yelled, {you had a fair and square duel with Erebus, and they dishonor your duel by looking for revenge after your victory, it was not your fault but theirs, father.}, said one of my loved children, which cause all the others to nod their heads in agreement.

{Dear}, said another one of my wives getting closer to me and crouching down in front of me, placing her hands in my cheeks and cupping my face so that I was looking straight at her.

{we know that you blame yourself for the outcome of that battle, and we have no idea of how much are you hurting right now, but we do know that you can’t die yet, no, you are not allowed to die yet, not until you take "his" throne, we won’t accept anything less from the man we all admire and love, go and experience new things, fight and keep fighting with that savage smile in your face, and then meet new wives that will become the home you return to after those battle, never stop looking forward my love, since that savage smile and that adventurous soul is what made us all love you as much as we do now}

I wasn’t able to answer, no, there was nothing for me to say, they all took turns to fill me with hugs and kisses, as they came up to me and disappeared from the white space, there was not a single grudge or regret left within them, I knew that the best since I was able to feel the emotions within their souls as if they were actually mine. After the last one disappeared, the white space turned dark, and when I opened my eyes again, I was in a hospital room.

I woke up with tears in my eyes, my eyes drifted to the home made wristband given to me by one of my daughters, I knew I felt a bit of their souls within it but I had no idea they placed a piece of their souls inside of it. I tried searching for remains but I can’t feel anything from it, that must mean that it wasn’t a dream and that this time was truly good bye.

I was feeling really trouble right now, a mixture of happiness, sadness, and an ever growing pride for them, the troubled feeling came from their last request, which was to take the throne the most unfathomable god of them all, the one who gave me the power of reincarnation.

{*sigh* this is going to be a really long adventure}, I said while strengthening my resolve and wiping off the tears off my face. When I was done with all of my inner monologue, the door of the hospital room opened and the man who rescued me from the fire stood there while looking at me as I looked towards him.

We spoke and I decided to be adopted by him instead of heading to an orphanage, I knew he was not a simple man since I could feel the strength of his soul was above a normal human, and he confirmed my thoughts with his last sentence before we left.

{Oh yeah, I should probably tell you this now, you see Shirou, I am a mage.]

This is how I became Shirou Emiya.