The valley Cat grew up in had much milder temperatures than where she was headed now. Some frost and fog in the morning was normal, but in general, if the day was cold, the night would be maybe twenty degrees colder. Bay Area University was considered to be in a desert, and while it wasn’t as dry as Cat was told deserts were, it was certainly just as extreme. Cat boarded a bus in Culosa late at night, wrapped in a sweater, with the Christmas presents she got this year (mostly sweaters and socks, and a new pair of boots) packed tightly in her duffle bag.

But as the bus rode on, traveling down the scenic highways, it only got colder. Cat had to put on another jacket during the ride. Daybreak came with a surprising amount of heat. Off came the sweaters, and on boarded people that sweat twice as much as Cat thought humans were supposed to.

In the late afternoon, Cat finally arrived at her regular stop outside of Bay Area University. Her bag was much lighter than in September, her hair longer. She walked with more confidence to her dorm building, though the ghost of anxiety still lingered in the back of her mind. She didn’t know who she would run into first, or if she was ready to face anyone yet.

She should have text everyone more during the break. But aside from the “happy holidays” and “you too” texts, she didn’t reply that much. It wasn’t that she didn’t miss them...but her schedule was quite packed between taking naps and staring at the TV screen and not actually watching anything. Sending a text and engaging in actual conversation took too much energy. And after the first couple weeks of being MIA and just not replying to the group chat, the guilt made her phone too heavy to pick up anyway.

Now, added to the anxiety of seeing Nate’s disgusting face after everything, she had to worry about her friends. Did they hate her for this? Or did they understand because Peter sucked at keeping secrets and he told them even though she asked him not to?

Cat’s feet dragged the entire way to the second floor of Casa del Sol. The hairs on the back of her neck stood on end; she didn’t find out when everyone else was returning, and she put it off as much as possible. Her dad’s Christmas bonus made it so that she felt comfortable enough to return to school a week later than she originally intended, so she had an additional week off from work. Tomorrow she got her schedule. The day after, classes began.

Familiar voices in the distance made Cat slow down even further. Hannah’s--Cam’s. Her dorm room door was open, and they must have all been hanging out inside. She didn’t intend to eavesdrop originally, but….

“...heard from her, like, at all. At first I thought she was mad at me, but like, if she didn’t talk to any of you….”

“I just figured she was busy.” Cam, always expecting the least out of everyone.

“I was out of the country for two weeks, so I just kind of thought everyone was doing that,” Kelsey said. “But now that I think about it, I don’t know...I think something bad happened.” Cat now stopped approaching her door all together, hesitating about a hundred feet away.

“What do you mean? Like someone died?” Hannah asked.

“No. You know she was really weird at the end of last semester. Like after all that work we did to chill, she just kind of...put the stick back up her ass.” Well that was rude.

“She said she was stressed. We all were.” At least Cam was on her side, she thought bitterly. Where was Kelsey getting all of this anti-Cat attitude from?

“We know her stress. This was different.” Kelsey’s hesitance built a tension Cat felt all the way to the hallway. Should she walk in now? Or no…? “Peter, you’re quiet. There were at least two opportunities for you to insult Cat there that you didn’t take. Do you know something we don’t?” Cat took several steps forward, but hesitated again. She wanted to know what he would say. But Peter wasn’t replying. Cat took some more steps toward the door, hesitating around the corner.

“I have nothing productive to add,” he said eventually. Cat took this as her moment to push the door open.

“That’s nothing new,” she said as she presented herself to everyone. “Never stopped you before, though.” The boys sat on her bed, the girls on Hannah, and all stared at her as if she just woke up from the dead. For a moment, everyone just sat there. Cat’s stomach twisted into a knot. “Uh...hi?”

“Cat!” Hannah finally exploded, jumping off her bed to rush her.

“Oh, wait--” Cat held out her hands, her duffle bag dropping to the floor with a hefty thud, but Hannah wrapped her arms around her anyway. “Sorry, I stink--bus ride--!”

“We haven’t heard from you!” her roommate cried, squeezing harder. “It’s been a literal month since you’ve talked to any of us!” Quick, something clever…. A month, what else cycled in months?

“I’m sorry,” she started, racking her brain for something acceptable. “Phone bill...you know, holidays are tough.” She didn’t technically lie, but it shut up her friends immediately. Just throwing out some random words that happened to paint a picture, no matter how untrue it was--that was fine, right? And it was easier than saying she’d been too down to text them. Then she’d have to--

“Oh, that’s okay,” Kelsey said, smiling as she approached. “I was gone a good chunk of the break, too. We hardly talked to anyone.” She gave a pointed look to the guys, who still sat there awkwardly. Peter chewed on his lower lip, looking guilty. Why? He did exactly what she asked--he didn’t say anything. He shouldn’t have felt bad.

“I thought you worked last week,” Hannah said as she finally pulled away.

“Nope...next week, though. I get my schedule tomorrow.”

"Oh, I totally miss-understood.” Hannah shook her head. “I thought you said you were coming back a week early for work.”

“Kelsey just got here, too,” Cameron said. The regular dynamic seemed to return with just a few minutes of shallow talk. Cat was able to excuse herself to shower quickly before they all went to dinner together. Although Peter seemed to glance her way more often than he used to; or maybe she was hyper-aware of it, now. Everyone else seemed normal.

Cameron spent most of the time filling everyone in on his Christmas exploits, mostly in gruesome sexual detail. He kept comparing everyone to Brad, though, from the party before finals.

“I mean she was fine. She was better than Brad at it. But after everything, we just kind of--like, you know? Ghosted. No chemistry.” Kelsey and Hannah rolled their eyes for the millionth time. “But anyway, now school--I’m psyched for water polo. Finally get to do something productive.”

“Not like your education is important,” Peter mumbled. Cam shot him a weird look, but didn’t touch upon it and continued his excited ranting about the coming semester.

Cat somehow forgot that Nate was on the water polo team. Peter and Cam would see him every day. Nate knew she hung out with them--would he try to hang out with them, follow them after practice? Peter would stop him, but what if it was just Cam? What if he lied to Cam and said things were fine?

Her ears rang, high-pitched and loud. She could hardly hear what anyone said over it; the food court was so warm, now. She must have been like that for some time, though, until Hannah nudged her.

“You okay?” Cat’s eyes snapped up to the table. Everyone stared at her, her half-eaten teriyaki bowl in front of her, while the rest of the table had finished their food.

“What?” She blinked. “Sorry--I zoned out.” Though it really felt like she went for a run. “Really tired from the bus ride….” This excuse animated the table back to their regular shenanigans, at least. While Cat picked at her food and everyone caught up, they kept making jokes about “waking up” Cat to listen to what everyone said. No one seemed to notice that Peter grew silent, too.

The nerves Cat thought she should feel for Week One of classes didn’t show. It was a little weird, to sit in class, to have the professor go over the syllabus and to not once think she was in over her head. Though last semester was her first time. Maybe she was just used to it now.

Unfortunately, with how every other feeling felt just as dull so far, a small part of her worried. It was like after she drank that beer at the party and went numb, nothing fully returned.

Cat opted to ignore it.

Maybe it was also because the coursework seemed lighter. None of her classes recorded attendance this semester, which seemed weird. Her pre-calc professor openly admitted, “If you read the book and understand the material, you don’t need to come to class. I only grade for the two midterms and the final.” No homework. No projects.

Ceramics was completely project-based. No required class time, just a list of open lectures to attend if she felt she needed to. She was assigned a little cubby to put her finished projects for grading, and another for her materials, which kind of mostly looked like second-hand kitchen utensils.

The English class was just a series of eight, equally-weighted essays based upon eight works written from several different cultures. No class attendance required--though encouraged for analysis and essay editing workshops.

Communications was only once a week, but three hours long on Monday nights. Easy, peasy. The class was also about half the size of the first one; and best of all, no sign of Peter in any of her courses.

Cat’s work schedule reflected the ease of her classes. Fridays and Saturdays were now completely free for her; for the first time since she was fifteen, Cat had actual weekends. And, best of all, she on longer opened for Jittery Joe’s. Though she traded opening for closing on Monday nights, and short shifts through Thursday.

Maybe the world was giving her a break. Maybe it sensed that she just needed a bit more time to lay in bed and stare at the ceiling, and it finally granted her this one wish.

Hannah tried her best to intercede. Even entering the second week, she seemed too excited to be reunited.

“Cat,” she called as she bounced on her bed while they got ready to go to sleep, “you’re single, I’m single. You know what we should do?” Go to the Valentine’s Day party at the frat house down the street together, Cat assumed, but didn’t respond. “We should be each other’s date to that Valentine’s Day party in a couple days.” Cat looked up from The Epic of Gilgamesh, shrugging.

“I don’t know,” she said, even though she’d already made up her mind. “I’m kind of partied out from the holidays. Maybe Kelsey’s up for it.”

“How are you partied out?” Hannah asked. She bunched her hair at the back of her head with a band in between her teeth to throw it all up in a bun. “Drink too much?”

“Yeah,” Cat lied. She hadn’t had a sip of alcohol since...but Hannah didn’t need to know that. She’d ask questions, get concerned, make a big deal out of it.

“Awww, damn. Okay, well maybe next time you’ll be up for it. Or we can just have a girl’s day.” That sounded heavenly. Cat nodded to her, and returned to her book. But Hannah seemed to want to keep talking about it.

“Maybe an outing with all of us, actually. Cam’s been super weird.” That was actually enough to get Cat to mark her page and look back at her roommate.

“What do you mean?” she asked, raising a brow. Cam seemed normal during dinners and lunches. Everything seemed normal.

“He’s like...mad at Peter or something. Not mad. But super bitchy. It’s like you and him traded roles or something.”

“Glazing over that you just called me bitchy,” Cat muttered. “I haven’t noticed anything.”

“It’s just the past couple days. You were working.” Hannah looked away, humming to herself. “I’m gunna try and figure it out. Let me know if you hear about anything. Kelsey hasn’t so far.” Hannah and her never-ending detective work. Cat shrugged. Who was she to try and pry into someone else’s secrets?

Cat never intended to ask Cam about his fight with Peter. She fully thought it would blow over. Roommates got annoyed with each other sometimes, it happened. She and Hannah were a little more compatible than the regular roommates, but even they sometimes got annoyed with each other. Cat just told herself Cam was annoyed with Peter for once, because even though Cam was patient and kind, Peter was still a lot to handle.

Monday mornings were traded from opening Jittery Joe’s to doing laundry. The laundry room on the first floor of the building was relatively empty, thankfully. There were only seven washers and dryers for the whole building to share, so it was important to set a schedule early, find a time no one else was using it.

Cat thought she’d found her niche, until her usual reading was interrupted by none other than Cam coming through the door with proof he’d literally never considered doing laundry this whole year until this moment. Cat raised her brows at him.

“Hey, Cat!” he called grimacing as he struggled to get his hamper through the door. “Are three open?” She nodded, a little horrified, and gestured to the six empty machines he could use. “Awesome.” She tried to go back to reading, but it was just too fascinating to watch Cameron shove as much fabric onto one machine at a time; he noticed her staring after he flicked them on, and shrugged.

“What? I have never sorted colors in my life, and never had any issues.” He thought she was staring at him like a science experiment because he didn’t sort out his red undies from his white shirts? Cat shook her head.

“Everyone has a method,” she muttered to herself.

“Actually,” Cam blurted, “I was hoping to talk to you.” Cat raised a brow. Advice? How to deal with Peter’s Holier than Thou attitude? How not to murder him? The trick was to plan it so elaborately that it would be too complex to actually go through with it.

“What do you want to talk about?” Cat asked instead, and scooted over on the bench to let him sit. The machines were really loud, but so was Cam, so it wasn’t hard to talk to him here.

“We’re, like, good friends, right?” He didn’t look at her when he sat down, fast and a little clumsy. Cat frowned and nodded. “Like you know that you could tell me anything and I’d never judge you.” When Cam finally faced her, Cat scrunched her brows together.

“Yes, and you can do the same with me. I mean--” She offered a laugh, hoping to lighten the mood. “I’ll judge you, but--”

“Are you hiding something from us? Hannah, Kelsey, me?” His tone made her stomach drop. “About the party last year.” It was almost accusatory, like he knew the answer was “yes” and he was daring her to lie. Something cold filled her chest; Cat stared at her hands, holding her book so tightly that her knuckles turned white. She didn’t want to tell him. But at the same time, she wondered--how did he find out?

She settled at nodding.

“Why wouldn’t you tell me?” What could she say? Hey, Cam, nice to see you. Oh, by the way, I almost got date raped. What, was that a conversation to bring up over dinner, or did he expect her to just call him right after? Cat shook her head, still avoiding his face.

“How did you find out?” Was Peter a big-mouthed liar after all?

“Dude, water polo practice has been really weird,” Cameron said through a sigh. That got her attention. She made a face and looked at him, half wondering where that sudden announcement came from, half dreading that all of this came out publicly, in front of the whole team.

“Huh? Why?”

“Because of Nate and Peter!” Cam looked at her like she was crazy. “I mean, you can’t think that he’d be okay with all of it, right?” Did he do something? Did Peter say something to everyone about Nate? Cat blinked at him, squinting. “You know I don’t judge, but like--there may have been a better way to go about it.” While relief washed over her shoulders, her stomach turned to stone. Cam wasn’t talking about the same thing she was.

Cat let out a slow breath, then looked up at him, suspicious. “How about you tell me what you think happened, and I fill you in on any missing details?” If Cam actually knew what happened, she doubted he would be mad at Peter. Cameron raised a brow at her.

“Um...okay. So, like, you went to that party as Nate’s date, blah, blah, blah, you guys were kind of a thing, and then you snubbed him to go have a threesome with Georgia and Peter and ghosted him.” Cat’s eyes went wide. For a moment, a faint fire in her stomach sparked, but dulled just as quickly.

"E-excuse me?” Cat stuttered.. “I did what now?” Was that how Peter was keeping it all a secret, by spreading around some stupid rumor that she slept with him?

“I...am gathering from your reaction that maybe that didn’t happen just like that.”

“No,” she spat.

“You...didn’t go as Nate’s date?”

“No.” The embers of her initial reaction ignited the more Cam pressed.

“You weren’t together?”

"No.”

“...and you didn’t have a threesome?” What was with Cam and threesomes? Cat rose to her feet, her fists shaking. Her book slipped out of her lap; she mentally reminded herself to pick it up when she was done committing mortal sins.

“I didn’t sleep with Peter or Georgia or--fucking--Cam, you were the last person I was with!” She wasn’t sure when she felt the need to start shouting, but every cell in her body was on fire. Those elaborate murder plans that she over-complicated to prevent herself from being impulsive flew to the forefront of her mind. Everything blurred from her rage, the heat in her chest. The room sizzled like a hot, summer day in the distance. Cameron leaned back, suddenly defensive.

“Okay! Okay, fine, you didn’t sleep with anyone, and Nate just thinks you did. What’s the big deal?” The big deal? The big deal was that Peter was supposed to be quiet about everything, not go twisting the story so he looked like some sort of womanizer that went out and stole dates and had threesomes!

Cat exploded, her face beet red. “Because Nate tried to rape me, Cameron!” she screamed, ignoring his gasp. “He drugged me! And Peter and Georgia found me before he could get to me and took me home! That’s it!" Everything was just too much--the shock, the anger, the shame--she knew her eyes were red, that she was going to start crying any minute. Cam couldn’t keep up with her; he sat there, shocked, and looked like he was about to stand up and hug her, his arms ready to wrap around her to hold her together, stop her from bursting into a million angry pieces. But Cat already headed to the door, throwing it open.

“Cat, what are you doing?”

“I’m going to fucking kill him!”

“Wait, who are you killing?” But his words muffled as the door slammed behind her.