Hannah and Kelsey really shouldn’t have shown Cat that app, especially that Roast My Subject thread. She had a good couple of rounds with PumpkinKing after her last post with the request to roast her.

InsultCatapult is one of a kind. Thank God.

Peter Framptin (kudos if you know who this is without looking it up)

Peter Framptin is so ashamed of his voice that he has to sing through his instruments, Cat wrote. Why wouldn’t someone know who that is? What, was this person trying to get brownie points for liking one of the most famous classic rock artists of all time? The guy was on Oprah! Pft. Roast the idea of “kudos.”

PumpkinKing “reacted to” her reply with a laughing emoji. Was she a hypocrite, smiling at a screen in her hand when she shamed so many others for the same thing? Kudos is a participation trophy you give to stupid people that surprise you when they say something smart. Roast the person that will post after you.

Oh, PumpkinKing wanted to play? Game on! And, to Cat’s delight, her debauchery was only encouraged by more slews of laughing emojis from people with ridiculous screen names. She and PumpkinKing were only able to exchange a few more posts before PandaSex69 interrupted with a pretty devastating self-burn: “My interest in watching that exchange continue is smaller than my micropenis.” PandaSex69 earned the fifty laughing emojis that he received.

This was far too distracting to be good at any length, Cat decided. Though addicting.

Her wakeup call was just hours after she got comfortable using Talkative. She sat in her usual chair in Communications with her face glued to her screen, waiting for the professor to arrive, when the hairs on the back of her neck stood on end. Ah, Darth Vader, himself entered the room. He had a way of chilling a sauna.

Anticipating battle, Cat looked up. But Peter merely raised a brow at her hand on her phone, and sat in his seat without another look back. And it wasn’t like she could just start spewing insults at him to egg him on, even if she was already greased and ready from that stupid thread. Not after...everything. Though she wanted to. That just wasn’t something a person did. Not when it wasn’t prompted.

Cat’s appetite for roasting random subjects disappeared after that.

The only thing that Cat looked forward to on Friday was her care package. Her parents and brother promised to send lots of little things to remind her of home, and they did not disappoint. Getting the staples removed hurt like a son of a bitch, and the only thing that stopped Cat from being in a horrible mood from the pain was the small, flat-rate box. Her mother drew hearts all over it, as if it would be embarrassing. It was a cute attempt. But it really just made her heart feel full, and it made the courier laugh when Cat identified it from a pile of processed boxes.

The goodies didn’t stop at a bag full of tamales. Underneath were stickers of sugar skulls and decorated skeletons, paper decorations, and bat window clings for her dorm’s window. And, of course, lots and lots of her favorite candies like sour gummy worms and Mike and Ikes. Best of all, a small bunch of used fake spider webs with spider rings in it right beside a bag of roasted pumpkin seeds. That was her brother’s touch.

Halloween was soon--two weeks from now. It was tradition, one of Cat’s favorites, to cook pumpkin seeds in the oven and decorate the front porch with her mom for all the neighborhood kids. They would see her walk out the porch with the fake spider webs and rush her, asking for more ghost stories. She’d gathered quite a repertoire to keep the cul-de-sac kids entertained throughout the years, too. Her little brother would always round up all the kids that weren’t around so she wouldn’t have to repeat the story over and over again, so she always had to have something new ready.

Nothing felt as nice as this did. Nothing radiated love and warmth like a box full of random crap that meant so much to her. And the tamales….

Cat glanced at the sticky note in her mom’s handwriting. Two, simple words: “To share” with “share” underlined three times. If the bag wasn’t bursting, and if she had a mini-fridge, Cat would pretend like she never saw that note...but there was no way she could eat all of these by herself.

And, as she looked at the tamales, her smile faded. There was more than one reason she got this piece of home. The rest of the reason sizzled in her bank account like acid, reminding her when she checked her balance that she had too much money in there, meant to be spent on workout clothes. Peter’s workout clothes.

Shopping for him was...weird didn’t cover it. The bookstore carried university activewear, thankfully. She didn’t know if she could build up the courage to ask Kelsey to drive her to the store to buy Peter clothes, so she remained on campus. She wasn’t even sure if Kelsey knew that Peter was there, if he was the one that took her to the Health Center. Cat wasn’t exactly specific when she explained everything, and with how tight-lipped Hannah was, there was no knowing how much Kelsey and Cam did or didn’t know. Cam wasn’t acting weird about it, and she thought that maybe he might if he knew. Was this whole thing a secret?

Cat hesitated in front of one of the mannequins. How was she supposed to know what size to get him? And how weird was it, walking around, picturing him in all these clothes? How weird was it that she went through them, and thought, No, I haven’t seen him wear any with sleeves. I don’t think he likes sleeves. How could she assume his preferences when she didn’t even know his full name until last week?

She drifted toward a white, sleeveless workout shirt and reached toward the material. It felt very similar to what she’d ruined. The price wasn’t bad, and it looked close enough. He said it was an old set of clothes, but he must have liked them for some reason if he kept them for that long. Cat picked one up and held it in front of her, squinting, trying to picture Peter standing in front of her.

Dammit, she should have just bit the bullet and asked Cam what size he was. But now Cam was in class, and she was already here…. Best guess in mind, Cat snatched the next size up for the shirt and went for the gym shorts. For these, she had a better idea. While Peter’s upper body was a bit broader, with bulkier shoulders, his waist looked very similar to Cam’s--and she knew his size.

Cat stared at the clock while she checked out with her purchase, chewing on her lip. Cam’s class would end in about half an hour. Did she want him to be around when she delivered these? Should she just do it now, or wait? She apparently, subconsciously decided when she returned to her dorm, and was surprised to find herself opening the bag of tamales to put one with the gym clothes. Should she get a paper towel for it? A napkin? Oh well, too late.

After a quick glance in the mirror to fix her hair and make sure her mascara wasn’t halfway down her face, Cat made her way to Cam’s--or, rather, Peter’s dorm.

Maybe he wasn’t in. Maybe she could just put it all on the floor and leave. But, because her mother raised her right, Cat gently knocked on the door and took a step back to wait.

Her heart leapt to her throat as she watched the door handle twist and pull inward. Peter entered the door frame, leaning against it as he propped the door open. He didn’t seem surprised to see her. Just like every Friday, he wore a plain shirt and jeans.

“Cam’s not--” His eyes dropped to her hands, “...here….” His expression softened to a slight confusion, a wrinkle by an eyebrow before he shook his head. “What? No, I said--”

“Shut up, it’s non-refundable.” Swallowing thickly, she offered the clothes in her hand, folded neatly and tightly, topped with a room-temperature tamale. God, if he didn’t take these from her soon, her hands were going to start shaking. “Take them.”

“I--I told you--”

“And you weren’t supposed to even hear that. So I’m pretending you didn’t. It’s….” Cat’s gaze faltered as she fidgeted, gesturing with her shoulder to the tamale. “It’s from my mom.” I’m not saying please, she told herself, so she repeated, “Take them.”

He took his sweet time. Peter’s dimples normally reserved themselves for smiles, but he pursed his lips so tightly, they punctuated his lips ever-so slightly. Finally, he broke away from the doorway and reached forward, gingerly accepting the replacement clothes. Warm, soft fingers brushed over hers, raising the hair on the back of her neck at the accidental touch. Those hands that literally pulled her out of a pond, that held her head while she floated in and out of fainting spells. That were soaked in so much blood, that carried her to the--

“Thanks, I guess.” Cat sucked in a breath. While she was stuck in her mind, Peter returned to the door, looking far more uncomfortable than she’d ever seen him. She wanted to turn and leave, but her feet rooted to the spot. The thickness in her throat seemed to spread to the space between them, heavy like morning fog.

“Cat--”

“Did you tell Cam?” she blurted before he could say anything. Peter blinked at her.

“Did I tell Cam...that I was there when you fell?” Saved my life, her mind corrected silently. “No, it hasn’t come up. Not really something I’ve advertised.” Something about the way he stood changed. He shifted his weight from one foot to another, his gaze narrowed curiously. Cat chewed on her lip and studied him just as closely.

“He didn’t wonder why you were covered in blood?” she challenged. Was this a secret? She didn’t intend for it to be--not that she actively hid it or anything.

“I’d already showered when I saw him at dinner,” was Peter’s answer. “Is this your way of telling me to eat the tamale before he comes back from class?”

“No.” At least not at first. But for a brief, selfish moment, she realized that she could eat more tamales by herself if Cam didn’t know she had them in the first place. But that wasn’t why she asked. Cat sighed. “I just didn’t know if he knew the whole story, or…. Whatever. It doesn’t matter. It’s not a secret or anything.”

“Look, as far as I’m concerned, this makes us completely even. Okay? Like it never happened.” When she tried to meet his eyes, his looked anywhere but at her. “Nothing has actually changed.” Something about him saying that sent a wave of relief washing over her.

“Right, nothing’s changed,” she echoed.

For a moment, the heavy fog remained. Peter finally looked up at her again, almost inauthentic when he said, “I still think you’re annoying. And stupid.”

She furrowed her brows. “What did I do that’s stupid?”

“You put a bare tamale on white clothes.”

“It’s not bare, it’s got the corn husk. Get over yourself.” He looked as if he was trying to scowl, but the laughter had already reached his eyes. Without a comeback, he shook his head and shut his door.

Dinner that night started off a little weird. Hannah and Cam sat with her in the food court, and Cat could already tell that Cam had talked to Peter about last week. There was something about him that was different, just the way he kept quiet, held back a little. Hannah kept giving glances to Cat, but they didn’t pry him. He would say something when he wanted to.

“So, Cat….” Here it was. “Why did you give Peter a tamale but not me?” Oh, for crying out--

Cat rolled her eyes. “You’re getting two,” she decided last minute.

“Oh!” He recovered immediately, his smile returning to grace the table. “I thought you were mad at me or something.” Why did Cat ever think she knew what was going on in his head? She was always wrong. Here she was, worried that everything would be weird, and Cam was just concerned that she was mad because of a tamale.

“No, I don’t know if I can be mad at you,” Catherine admitted through laughter. “Just haven’t been back to my dorm.”

“So--I feel dumb,” Cam said quickly, glazing over what she said. “I totally missed when you said he was there.” Now here it was. Cat froze, her heart aflutter in her chest and her fingertips numb against her chopsticks. 3...2...1…. “So are you guys, like, friends now?”

“Nothing’s changed,” she was quick to correct. Cam didn’t seem to hear her, and Hannah’s stare was a hundred pounds.

“So can we hang out with both of you at the same time, then?” Cat finally snapped her gaze up to Cam. She didn’t know what she expected, but he seemed excited. Her brows knitted together. “Like tomorrow we can all go get Mexican together, rather than us splitting our time like divorced parents?”

“Wait, do you guys go to Mexican without me?” Why would they go to Mexican food without the Mexican? Was that what they were doing when she couldn’t ever figure out where everyone was?

“Well,” Hannah started, obviously looking to diffuse Cat’s new mood, “not always Mexican. We just hang out when you’re at work and stuff.” Now what Peter said a few weeks ago made sense. They had been hanging out when she wasn’t around.

“You...felt like you had to hide that from me?” It wasn’t what she wanted to say, but it was the nicest version. Her reality had been challenged too much lately. She wasn’t sure if she could handle one other, little thing.

“Not just you--” Cam started. He seemed to regret his words the minute they flew out of his mouth. “I mean, not hiding. Just when someone brings one of you up, the other gets all...irritated.” The table got very quiet all of a sudden. “I mean, just because--like you guys...we like hanging out with you, but don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”

Peter’s voice echoed in her head, repeating, Does it bug you that I’m a better person than you? The increase of her blood pressure brought her headache back, and she stared at the table. She was forcing them to choose between her and Peter. And she wasn’t so confident in who they would pick anymore. She never saved a life.

“Cat--” Hannah could sense her spiral.

“You don’t have to pick between us,” Cat said, looking up to them and plastering on a smile. “I’m a big girl. If I’m annoying you, just tell me.”

Cameron and Hannah exchanged looks before he said, “So...you wanna come to La Hacienda tomorrow after work? Kelsey offered to drive us all.”

“Yeah, of course! I mean--” She shrugged and poked at her food to feign nonchalance. “If it’s okay with Peter. I know I’ll behave.” Or at least she’d try.

“You know, we should’ve just asked sooner,” Hannah decided, shaking her head. “It’s kind of stupid that we were scared of either of you getting upset. I mean, you see each other all the time and nothing’s happened. Like, he even stopped you from dying. At this rate, you’ll be married by the time the world ends.” Cam certainly found it funny, but Cat shot her a warning look. He noticed, seemingly amused by this.

“If that pissed you off, can I have her tamale?”