《The Pride Of A Talentless Nobody》Chapter 5: Flumen Valle (Part 2)
Advertisement
"DON'T IGNORE ME YOU LITTLE PUN-"
In the corner of my eye, I spot a Pig, getting ready to tussle
Why would I be asleep, oh little John I was just resting!
But...
As your Teacher, I cannot allow this pig-
"You are quite irritating standing up to a supreme being you PISS ME OFF!"
"AGGGHHHHH"
With one punch the heckler flew to the other side of the room
"Awwwww SO WEAK!"
"PITIFUL PITIFUL PITIFUL!
"All that talk about seeing pockets, and pockets and pockets!"
"You are a lowly scum aren't you?"
"No, you are a meathead, a P-I-G!"
This peasant is most likely going to try something futile, I should...
YES, I SHOULD!
"Swoosh~"
Standing next to the Pig I look down at him with a frantic and menacing smile
He is trembling, I like this, THIS IS WHAT I NEEDED PEOPLE BOWING BEFORE ME!
"H-how di-"
This guy is so similar to John...
Talk, talk, talk but-
"AGHHHH"
I grab his pig-like head and smash it into the floor
"AGGGGHHH"
"SMASH, THUD, SPLAT!"
MORE, MORE, MORE!
NEVER TRY TO IRRITATE ME AGAIN!
"I'll ki-"
Is he trying to speak I'll make sure he can't!
"AHAHAHAHAHAHA"
"SO WEAK!"
I kept at it more and more and more-
"I'LL KWILL YERG"
What did he say?
"ARGGG!"
The Pig swung his left arm at me...
"AAGHHHHHHH!"
I grabbed that sorry excuse for a punch and hold his arm
"This hurts you?"
I lean into his ear and ask
"What did you say to me?"
The big guy started panting off exhaustion, I can hear his hog like breath
"I'LL KILL YER"
Taking his meat sized arm I go around back and hold him in place and-
"SNAP!"
"AAAAAAAAAAGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"
His screams of anguish it's SO DELIGHTFUL!
I BROKE HIS ARM!
Huh, I feel a little odd
I took the guy some feet away and look around
This feeling...
Wrath...
Towards me?
The people around the tavern are just standing there watching...
Nobody is trying to interfere but wait-
OH, THAT'S IT!
I remember there was another guy sitting with this big PIG!
I feel his presence with a couple of other people heading straight here!
God better bless them, they will not stand a chance...
I go and turn around to the big PIG that started this ordeal
I slowly make my way there
"Tip, Tap, Tip"
I go crouch down to him and look at him dead in the eyes
"Your little buddies are coming here..."
"I'll show you how insignificant you really are YOU PIG!"
"GAAAA SPEW"
I spit on the pig's face and make my way back to the mashed potatoes
But I stop midway
The tavern, it's odd why are they all quiet and not running out...
Wait do they-
OH, I see!
Advertisement
They want to see him beaten...
that's the only answer...
"Damn YOU!"
I turn around and see another Burly pig charge at me, his accomplice?
"You honestly think I will not TOSS YOU LIKE YOUR LITTLE PIGLET FRIEND?"
I chuckle and he makes his swing
Honestly, that was one of the easiest dodges I could have performed in my life!
I shifted my weight onto my left foot and rotated my body to accommodate...
He keeps swinging and swinging around haymakers...
This is getting boring...
I close my eyes and dodge trying to locate the other couple of piglets
I dodge moving down, left, right, rotating Johns's body at ease.
This is getting too irritating, I'm going to finish this up...
"Never try that in front of a GOD!"
I threw out a punch harder than the guy I struck before.
HE WENT FLYING AHAHAHA!
Yep, he's not going to move any time soon...
Now for some mashpota-
"BOYS GET EM, IT WAS JUST A FLUKE THAT OUR BOSS WENT DOWN"
I heard footsteps behind me again, five men the same size as the previous two...
"Don't try it I'm not in the mood to play with some pigs..."
I stare at the guy who rallied up his men
"YOU BAST-"
"Look what I did to them do you not think someone like wouldn't take all you out like insects?"
I kept staring at the so-called "Second in command"
"If you keep this up"
"I will kill all of you..."
I look at him, this game has gone long enough
I shouldn't be playing with some pigs...
"Tsk all right boys let's go,"
The Pig said as he and his men went to tend the other piglets
I swear if someone bothers me again I will make sure they won't talk to any mortal again...
Now looking around the Tavern was empty the exception being the good-looking lass and the chef whom I can hear in the back.
I waited for the men to leave and headed to the mash potatoes.
"WOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
"CLAP, CLAP, CLAP"
"WHISTLE"
I was dead on...
THEY DID HATE THEM!
The tavern cheered me on, calling me great and splendid names!
"THAT'LL TEACH EM!"
"YOU GO, BOSS!"
"YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAH"
Having something like this
Makes me smile
I resume making my way to the mashed potatoes waving off the people in the tavern
I love this!
Regularly I had this type of clapping due to my stupendous title but...
It's good to be free!
"HEY MISTER ANYTHING YE ORDER IT'S ON ME!"
I heard a voice behind me speak out to me, being louder than the chanting crowd
I turn around and reply to such a generous offer
"THANKS, BUT I'M ALRIGHT!"
I scream so he could hear me, I also made hand gestures
I resume again my mashed potatoes route
Advertisement
IT'S SO GOOD BEING TREATED LIKE A IMPORTANT PERSON!
This should happen every time I step in one place but I guess my legacy was forgotten...
Well, it's been, a long time...
Even for you John...
I approach the chair and grab it plopping myself down
"John you shouldn't have shown gold in a damn tavern those thugs would have had a field day with you"
In an irritated tone, I tried to scold John
"Hey, John..."
I said again, the waitress if she heard me would have thought I was crazy...
Oh, I'm guessing the kid's asleep...
Ehhh it's too much of a hassle to do anything else I'll just go and do what it was I originally wanted to do-
Taking the seat and making it have enough room for me I take the spoon and begin eating-
tsk, it's cold...
"Hey, miss... could ya warm this up for me?"
Looking at the lass dead in the eye while leaning back on the seat she hesitantly went over
"Su-sure thing mister"
She came over and took my plate being cautious she takes a bit but it's good food so I won't act upon her
I can't believe humans are that weak that they did not act upon them any sooner...
Now that I think about it it's been 1000 years huh?
I look over to the window and see the reflection of "my" body.
Ehhhh John should put his hair back it looks better that way...
More like this!
I take my hands and fix "my" hair...
going back a couple of times...
. . .
all done!
As I'm done fixing my hair I hear-
"He-here, sir!"
From the reflection of the window, I saw the lass put the food on my table and speed-walked away
"THANKS LOVE!"
I said loud enough for her to hear
Now my reward!
I take the spoon out and Woah, the mash potatoes have increased in volume, she put more!
Lovely miss, I like her now, such a wonderful person doing this for a magnificent being such as me, FINALLY SOME RESPECT!
I take a bite and savor the taste
"It's been 1000 years huh?"
I went back to the previous topic and muttered to myself
Still can't believe that GREEDY plain-faced bastard got the help from that Zealous witch and sealed me in a box using help from that damn high and mighty bloodlust woman, just because I was seen as a "Threat".
I had everything...
Power, Money, Women, everything was so good...
But these DAMN FOOLS!
No use in getting angry there is no way I can travel 1000 years in the past not even with magic...
"sigh~"
Oh, acting more rational now?
If this was me in my prime all those decades ago I would have tried to find a solution instantly even if it meant murder and genocide...
This must be Johns's personality slipping in with mine.
Come to think of it I've gotten a little soft on this kid, haven't I?
It's also my fault that his life got ruined...
I guess they felt my presence in the box shift from one place to another and probably thought I was free so they most likely did that to make sure I was gone for good...
We have a similar downfall don't you think John?
One problem I have is can those Sinful bastards live that long?
That was about 929 years after I got sealed in that box...
I place my hand on "my chin" thinking and the only solutions that I can think of are either that...
They achieved Immortality, or someone as powerful as us Warlocks of sin...
I recline on the chair and put my hands behind my head while still looking up
There is someone in this city with a pretty big mana, not as big as mine but something little John will have to look after, well he wouldn't be entirely defenseless if push comes to shove I can always override him and win...
No, I should hold off on that unless if he is about to-
Wait, he incorporated my Prejudice and made it his own...
That was quite odd if I were to use "Omnino Praestatur" I would be able to hit someone 100% of the time, with my mana being drained as an effect...
But he made it his own by making it instead of hit it dodges...
That's so interesting good thing I didn't kill him...
THERE I GO GOING SOFT, but seriously that kid he reminds me of when I was a naive young lad...
If only I had power then-
I look down and see the mashed potatoes cooling
I have to enjoy this as much as I can...
Mhhhhmmmm SO GOOD!
This is the best it is not as salty as the sea nor as salt-less as water its the best!
No big chunks so I don't have to put the effort into biting, the gravy is spectacular too!
BRAVO!
A while passed as I was taking my time I finally finished it and stood up, John I'm satisfied you can take over
"John?"
"Hello, John?"
I hit "my" head a couple of times
That's odd I know that even the loudest noises can be heard in the unconscious state...
I was thereafter all...
"JOHN!"
I screamed, making faces turn my way but I just ignored them
What the hell could be going on...
I put my feet onto the table and started to think for a proper solution
So I abruptly took over his body, luckily It was suitable for me to host it...
IT CAN'T BE!
Advertisement
- In Serial24 Chapters
Magriculture
When Aurum Industries announced the first Full Immersion Virtual Reality Massive Multiplayer Online Role Playing Game (FIVRMMORPG if you're hip) Limitless Online, most people saw it as an opportunity to live out their sword and sorcery fantasies. John, however, saw it as the opening of a new and as of yet uncrowded job market. One he was willing, and eager, to exploit. Determined to make money through virtual hard work and effort, John sets his sights not on the heights of magic or the perfection of the sword, but instead upon the tilling of the soil and the sowing of seeds as he explores the wide and wonderful world of magical agriculture all from the comfort of his own bed. Disclaimer: This is, at best, a very rough draft. I have already had to do one major rewrite and several minor rewrites of entire sections of the story, and it is a virtual certainty I will have to do re-writes again. Such changes may be as small as editing a few numbers (such as going back and changing how much mana an object holds) or it may force me to re-write entire chapters (this has happened once already, and I'm really hoping it doesn't happen again, but... life). Minor re-writes will probably never be posted here. Major rewrites probably will.Anyway, what this boils down to is: If you're looking for a fully cohesive story with few to no errors and publisher level editing, this is not the story for you. If your looking for a cohesive plot that's more than "Man farms, man farms, man farms well, man maybe makes money" you're probably also in the wrong place, but I will attempt to entertain you anyway.
8 156 - In Serial54 Chapters
A Psychic's Scarlet Dream
Those who can do things scientifically impossible are called supernaturals. Among those who know about them, there maybe those who fear them, those who respect them or even those who want to kill them. That however doesn’t matter to the supernatural named Kais as he has and wants no connection with anything that might be related to the world of supernaturals. However, the day he meets a particular brown-haired youth, that would change and he who has tried to run away from the truth for many years will be forced to confront it. New Chapters every Monday, Wednesday and Friday.
8 285 - In Serial26 Chapters
Skydrift: A Steampunk Fantasy (edited version)
Life has adapted to meet the demands of a world in resurgence. Niles Wentworth, captain of the airship water hauler Dusty Maiden and his crew, are on their way to the desert capital Dara City with a large shipment. During their journey, they come upon a Guardian airship under attack by pirates. Soon after the down to earth captain learns the world isn't what he thought it was—and only he and his crew, along with their new Guardian friends, can do anything to stop the coming threat.This novel is complete and is approximately 180 pages. As of posting, I'm approximately 25% finished with the edits and will be uploading a new chapter every day. Once this novel finishes, feel free to search for it online if you want a digital copy. I'm going to indie publish it and put it up on goodreads. Don't forget to check out my other novels and stories here on Royal Road, Goodreads, and on platforms like Smashwords, Apple Books, Kobo, etc. Everything I have is free!
8 170 - In Serial36 Chapters
Infestation
The world is being overrun with 'hives', corrupting buildings into nests for monsters. The unlucky people in a building when a hive emerges either die, witness someone die, or gain otherworldly power. The latter are known as 'users'. Charlotte, a recently emerged user with the rare power of precognition, has found herself stranded with little to no support and a desperate need to get some money. She's weak and so teams up with a stranger to clear hives together but life quickly falls into disarray as her situation and paranoia compound.
8 176 - In Serial12 Chapters
I Live a Funny Life
I always wanted to study in Japan. I just finished middle school, and what better time to live the dream than starting at high school right? where youth and the hormones are at its peak. Now i'm starting high school, standing in front of the gates, while being mistaken as a lost cosplayer. Not a bad start right? i mean, it could be worse. Nothing bad can happen to a foreigner that's trying to study in Japan... Right?
8 117 - In Serial47 Chapters
The Endless War
New chapters will be posted weekly on Mondays and Saturdays. ---------------------------------------------------- Seers are the only defense that Terra has against the monsters that lurk about in the world. Terra is a city fighting for its own survival in a fantasy world with finite resources. One of the main ways to survive is to fight. War is a common practice and more often than not the leaders of the world cannot get along with each other. In the end, however, all of this fighting does more harm than good. A young boy wishes to put an end to the wars, this boy's name is Isaac. He holds a strong belief that everyone can be saved in this world and that no one should be given up on. Peace is something that he truly believes will help the world and allow civilians to see another day. In order to reach such an impossible goal, he will have to fight in the name of his Region. Does he have what it takes to finally bring peace to the world with the help of his friends, or will he fail before he can even scratch the surface?
8 316

