《Conflicted Feelings》Chapter 5: Elizell
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The years went by and mother’s sickness got worse. Father wouldn’t enter her room still nevertheless from time to time he’d ask the doctor to update him about her state.
Mother complained very much of being unable to go out, at been restrained, chained like an animal she would say. But she liked writing. So I assisted her to write until her fingers shook too much and it became impossible for her to write a single word.
“I can write now,” I said to her, quite pleased with myself, proposing to write whatever she needed me to.
Sometimes she’d agree and other times she wouldn’t want me to touch her things. When the pain was too much for her to handle and the medicine took time to act, the sole sound of another person in her room would annoy her. She would then cry in anger and then flung whatever was close to her to the person in the room, be it me or the maids. But with the passing months, she became unable to do even that. She would cry silently for it hurt too much when she was loud.
The doctor said to father, when I was spying by the door that she didn’t have long to live anymore. She was now extremely pale, her hair gone, her lips blue and she would sometimes release earth-shattering cries, crouching on the bed, like a fish searching to breathe.
Father, even though he himself refused to come closer to her room, ordered me to keep her company even when she was mad, mostly when she was mad he said.
The doctor, eventually, told her to be prepared. That’s why possibly she thought it was time to explain her actions, to shield them with her unhappy childhood, her unhappy wedding.
Maybe it was the stillness, that state of being bedridden for so many months, or maybe I was the only one near, so she started talking, afraid when she’d stopped, it would be the very end. For once she wasn’t complaining. Not by much anyway.
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She apologized for the many things she did, for the cruel thoughts she had and sometimes while she was talking I wouldn’t even know what she meant at the time. One day she apologized to birthing me and the young I was quite conflicted about that. Should I have been joyous that she thought my birth was a kind of horrible punishment?
By the time when she was too thin and too frail to even take a step out of her bed, she talked about father, saying she never saw such an unreasonable man. In soft whispers, she would confide in me how much she tried. She repeated that a certain amount of times. She tried her hardest she said, to love that man but he wasn’t letting anyone in.
Once more she apologized. By that time, she was already delirious I believed, alternating between crying because of the pain and apologizing to me for numerous things, mostly, these days, for giving birth to me.
After some words she’d silently cried about the pain, asking to take a higher dosage of medicine, but since the doctor didn’t permit, no one gave her any.
To distract the pain maybe, she apologized to me about the punishments she used to give me and after a long list of what she was specifically expressing regret for, she asked me if I forgave her.
Riel was in the room, and gently, she nudged me with her elbow seemingly asking me to express myself. But was I really authorized to express what I really felt at that time? Could she really take that? Was the truth what she was asking for?
“Say I forgive you” mouthed Riel.
Mother was so thin that one could see her bones under her skin. Even to me they clearly said she was dying and father said I had to be courteous and not make things difficult.
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I take my time to look at the tired state of mother.
She was dying so I just had to forget about her slapping me every time she verbally fought with father, was I to forget all the time when I stayed hungry all day long, was I to forget that actually all the time she was drunk she would say that I was the reason to her unhappiness?
I saw her pale white skin, red eyes and knew better than to utter words of displeasure. She wouldn’t listen anyway. My lips pursed shut as I swallowed the certainly hurtful words one shouldn’t listen in such a sorry state.
So I closed my eyes, not complaining about the years I spent reaching for both of my parents and only grabbing wind. Instead I said "I forgive you".
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Where did I wake up?
A pretty standard story about a man that gets transferred to a new world, and gains a system to help him survive. This is pretty close to the first draft of this story, so there will be grammar mistakes until I get down to fixing them. Synopsis, genre and tags will also change as I get more writing done. I will try to release two to three short chapters a week. I don't own the cover image; it is just something I found online.
8 184Master of Cards. *Reborn*
Set in a world where magic and the modern world exist. Kael Webster was a loser in his first life. He lost everything all because he refused a deal. His girlfriend left him, his family murdered. The businesses that he had inherited from his family dried up because of sabotage from his other family members. Kael lived a total of 52 lives ever since then. By the end of the 52nd life, he slayed the Malevolent Gods that ruined his family when he was Kael. He was given the chance to return. So he did. Now returning as the 18 year old Kael Webster, fresh in college and about to start his life once again. Only difference? Kael remembers all 52 lives he had. Now what is he going to do?
8 188Dungeon City Vanskoria
In this modern era, a dungeon where magic existed emerged almost 300 years ago. After a long history, a city were erected as humanity frontier to challanging the dungeon. Between blood and broken bone, in the face of eternal struggle, human adapted to the challange. From the ashes of burning desire to life came human that capable to use magic. They were called Magus, and they were all born, life, and die protecting the Dungeon City Vanskoria. The story following several characters, Leon and Hana, a teenager pair that has just starting their dungeon diving world. He, a bastard child, came from nowhere and no family background. She, a cursed child, unwanted by her family. Together they tried to find comfort in each other and tried to make a living in the dungeon city. When the relationship between Vanskoria and the rest of the world were worsened, Ray Edmund step forward as a representative for the city. His work was to tell the world what dungeon is all about and how Vanskoria deal with it. As a veteran of dungeon diving, he quickly found that his world was really different from the world that normal people saw. The final character, Arianna Valentine, a normal girl with a normal life, faraway from the dungeon life. But there was an accident that involving her and a magus several years ago. From then on her view were distorted little by little, dragging her surrounding into a total confusion and unknown future. Author Note : Update weekly on Weekend (around friday-sunday), 3-5k words per chapter Slow pace, lots of conversation and drama. The action part will came later on.
8 75Gallinus
I have no idea how to describe my story, because I just became a Rooster. Besides, I have no idea where I am... What should i do? Ps: The meaning of the colors were chosen by me, so there is no study behind them. Ps2: My english is very poor, so sorry for any mistakes. Ps3: This is the translation of my story on Wattpad.
8 99Lucky Me!
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8 103The Alpha's Silent Mate
C̶l̶i̶c̶h̶e̶ 𝐍𝐨 𝐖𝐚𝐲!! ʸᵒᵘ ᵏⁿᵒʷ ᵗʰᵒˢᵉ ˢᵗᵒʳⁱᵉˢ ʷʰᵉʳᵉ ⁱᵗˢ ᵗʰᵉ ˢʰʸ ˡⁱᵗᵗˡᵉ ᵒᵐᵉᵍᵃ ᵃⁿᵈ ʰᵉʳ ᵐᵃᵗᵉ ⁱˢ ᵗʰᵉ ᵇⁱᵍ ᵇᵃᵈ ᵃˡᵖʰᵃ? ʷᵉˡˡ ʸᵒᵘᵛᵉ ᶠᵒᵘⁿᵈ ˢᵒᵐᵉᵗʰⁱⁿᵍ ᵃ ˡⁱᵗᵗˡᵉ ᵈⁱᶠᶠᵉʳᵉⁿᵗ. ❅She's a queen looking for her king.He's a mute looking for answers.They all expect her to be mated to a strong, fearsome Alpha. They expect him to have no mate.What game was fate playing at pairing these two? ❅❝I don't know, I'm not stupid, I'm just really good at denying facts.❞♛𝐇𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬♛#38 in werewolf#1 in alphaqueen#2 in queen#4 in alphafemale#64 in witch#96 in paranormal
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