Chapter 40

I recapped my visit with Taejun when I returned home that evening. He seemed to be in a little bit of disbelief at my description of our parents and their new apartment. I wondered if he felt the same guilt I did. But I knew my half-assed English description would be far less impactful than seeing it himself.

“They stayed out of debt. Father was not gambling,” I told him. “I think, this time they are true changing.”

“Truly,” he corrected. I imitated the word and he corrected my pronunciation again. Taejun mulled over what I had said to him. “They really didn’t ask you for any money this time?” he asked suspiciously.

I shook my head.

“That’s… uncharacteristic. No debt either… Maybe they’ve finally been scared straight this time,” he said thoughtfully. They hadn’t been bent, I thought. But I think I understood what he meant.

“They tell me you sended them money,” I said. “Should I send some too?”

“Sent, not sended. And, no,” said Taejun shortly. “I’ll handle it.” He’d always been against me sending them money, so it had been surprising for me to hear that he had been sending them money to help out. But it was also a bit of a relief to know that my brother wasn’t heartless enough to leave my crippled parents completely helpless.

“Will you visit them again?” he asked.

I nodded. Whenever I could back out of speaking English, I did.

“Don’t go too often,” he warned.

To be honest, going to that dank place wasn’t particularly appealing to me either. “Ok, sir,” I said, making the ok hand gesture. Taejun snorted.

We decided that once every two weeks was enough.

“Eunsoo told me he saw you last week,” Seolhee said. We were at her apartment lounging on her couch having a chill coffee after having lunch. The TV was playing something but neither of us were really watching.

We hadn’t had sex after our first date. Or even the next few after that. But eventually we’d done it again. Now it wasn’t particularly unusual for me to be over at her apartment, and it didn’t necessarily mean we were about to do the deed.

I hummed noncommittally as I sipped my cup and looked at my phone. It was actually Taejun’s old phone. I’d reclaimed it now that I was no longer hiding from him.

“I’m surprised you’re still talking to him,” I commented. Despite Eunsoo telling me to keep in touch, I hadn’t seen him at the store again (despite my manager gleefully and irresponsibly ordering another big batch of tomato juice) or received any messages from him. I hadn’t sent him anything either. I’d never been good at starting random casual conversations.

“I see him every weekend,” Seolhee laughed.

“Oh.” I said, looking up. “I didn’t know you were still going to the meets.”

“I can still go even if I’m not on a team. I was barely a member of the Blue Tigers anyways,” she scoffed. “I like going. It’s fun. Why don’t you go anymore?”

“Just done with it,” I said. I no longer trusted Seolhee enough to tell her anything about my personal affairs. But I wanted to ask her about something Eunsoo had offhandedly mentioned. “You told Eunsoo we were dating?”

“Isn’t that what we’re doing?” she laughed.

I felt conflicted. I wasn’t sure if we were on the same page anymore. I had thought we both knew this was a casual, no strings attached thing. The way Seolhee had answered just now made it seem like she thought it was an actual relationship. But I’d never asked her to be my girlfriend, or even to be exclusive.

Asking her what she considered us to be now would make me look like an asshole.

“You’re so oblivious, Jae-nom,” Seolhee said with an eye roll. Luckily Seolhee read me like a book. “I haven’t been seeing or doing anyone else on the side, you know. Have you?” she accused.

“No,” I said in surprise.

“Then we’re at least exclusive,” she huffed. “Even if it isn’t official, we are dating.”

I felt myself growing a little hot around the collar. It was definitely an intoxicating thought that the infamous Seolhee had seemingly renounced her promiscuous ways for … me? I was a total scrub. I didn’t have much else doing for me other than my taller than average height and my looks. (Maybe? Fuck. Forget I said anything.)

“Did you… did you want to make it official?” I asked bashfully. Ugh. I felt my face heating up. I covered it with my hand idiotically and looked away. “I thought you didn’t want a relationship.”

“I told you I would have made an exception for you,” she said softly. I felt her leaning in towards me.

It took me a moment to compose myself. Even though our entanglement had started off messily and recklessly, I’d been able to step away from my obsessive infatuation with her thanks to the near instantaneous drama at the start. Over these past few months we’d been going steady and more carefully. Despite my caution towards her now, I’d really enjoyed getting to know her beyond that pretty face (and rocking body) and actually spending time with her.

I swallowed my nervousness with a deep breath. When I felt ready, I turned back to her. Seolhee wore a hopeful smile. She really was gorgeous when she smiled (even though that was most of the time).

“Then let’s do it,” I said. “Let’s make it official.” Immediately I felt my face heating up again and I cursed myself.

Fortunately for me, Seolhee thought it was cute. “Awww,” she gushed, leaning into me. She nuzzled into my neck. Her silky hair was wonderfully ticklish. “You’re adorable. I love how flustered you get around me,” she said mischievously. “But yes. Let’s do it.”

“Don’t laugh,” I grumbled. Seolhee giggled even more. I took her coffee cup out of her hands and put it on the table. She looked at me questioningly for a second before I tackled her back onto the couch. She struggled and laughed as I tried to kiss her quiet. She turned her head this way and that so my kisses landed on her cheeks and chin.

“Quit trying to get away,” I threatened playfully.

“Or what?” Seolhee asked defiantly.

“I’ll do this.” I slid my hand under her shirt and tickled her belly. She shrieked and tried to wiggle away, but I kept her pinned.

“Jae! Stop,” she begged through her helpless laughter. I laughed and took mercy on her. I kissed her lean stomach and laid my head on it comfortably.

“I thought you wanted me to stop laughing,” she accused.

“My planning and problem solving skills are not very good,” I mumbled into her stomach, causing her to laugh again at the ticklish feeling.

She reached down to pat my hair, and with a pleased sigh I leaned into her touch. “You love when I pet your hair,” Seolhee commented. “Most guys hate it. But you’re just like a little puppy. My little gangaji. I’ll call you that from now on.”

We just started this relationship and she’d already come up with a pet name for me. “You came up with a pet name so quickly,” I commented.

“You made it easy, nae gangaji.”

“Now I need one for you,” I said. “Maybe jagi?” Jagi was a common one. I tried it on for size. “You look beautiful today, jagi.”

“Ew! No, you sound like Eunsoo,” Seolhee laughed. I laughed too. It was true, Eunsoo did throw ‘jagi’ around pretty casually.

I nuzzled her stomach. “I’ll think of something unique later. For now, how about aegi-ya?”

“That’ll do,” Seolhee said loftily. Despite her snooty tone, she seemed pleased. I smiled and shifted to sit properly again.

“Don’t sit up,” Seolhee said breathily. I wonder if she knew how sexy she looked with her hair half messed under her and her lips parted like that. She pressed her leg against my side. She knew. I slipped into her embrace.

How could I resist?

I was pleased to find a three in one heater, fan, and dehumidifier air conditioner for my parents home. It was a bit of a splurge on my current salary, but I knew they needed it in that dank underground room.

If only it wasn’t so heavy, I thought. My arms were getting sore carrying it. I still felt uncomfortable taking my car to that neighborhood. My little yangachi was fine for deterring other curious children, but I was more afraid of a full grown yangachi stealing it or its tires.

Speaking of… The young thug from last time must have lived nearby because he was there again outside the complex. He recognized me as I was walking up. He bounced up to me and followed me down the street. I kept aways from him so his grubby little hands couldn’t go exploring my pockets if I wasn’t vigilant. I was a bit defenseless with my hands full of air conditioner.

“Annyeong, hyung-nim! Where’s your car?” he asked eagerly. Clearly he’d enjoyed his task from last time and was hoping to reclaim his role.

“Say annyeonghasseyo to strangers,” I advised him. I’d convinced myself that the scamp was only calling me hyung-nim because I was older and a stranger, and not because he was trying to look gangster. “I didn’t bring it.”

He was disappointed. “We’re not strangers,” he protested.

“Yes we are. You don’t know my name. I don’t know yours.”

“I’m Lee Inho,” the kid proclaimed. When I didn’t reply with my own name, he persisted. “I know you visited Baek-ajumma. You’re her son right?”

I tried to ignore him.

“Are you Baek Taejun?” he asked. I looked at him sharply. His eyes were shining with wonderment. Truly, my brother’s notoriety knew no bounds if even street rats like this kid knew his name.

“I’m not. How do you know that name?” I asked.

“Baek-ajumma told everyone in the neighborhood not to mess with her because her son is a big jjapsae officer,” the kid said eagerly.

Taejun wasn’t police. But I found it a little strange that my mother was apparently throwing Taejun’s name around as a defense even though she hadn’t seen Taejun in almost ten years. The only reason she even knew that Taejun worked for the NIS was because I told her.

I wondered if Taejun would actually do anything if something did happen to my parents.

But then again, the way he had dealt with the Seven Directions gang had been terrifyingly heavy handed. (Maybe I shouldn’t be wishing that he would be spurred to action.)

“If you’re not Taejun, then who are you?” the kid demanded.

“I’m the younger brother, Baek Jaehyun.”

“Ohhh,” said the kid. His eyes went wide. My existence was probably a little less widely broadcast, if at all. After all, I didn’t have any great achievements or heft to my name.

With his questions answered, and no treats or money forthcoming, he scampered off without even saying goodbye. I sighed in relief and went into the complex.

My instinct had been right. There were indeed a pair of full grown yangachi standing outside my parent’s complex when I left them that evening. Scratch that. These weren’t yangachi. They were full fledged gangsters. I felt chilled but it wasn’t that unexpected in a neighborhood this bad. I just hoped they weren’t there for my parents.

I tipped my hat down over my eyes as I approached to not attract their attention. It didn’t work.

“You’re good at hiding, I’ll give you that,” one of them growled. I looked up in alarm. To my dismay, it was Han Jungho’s favorite thug. Fortunately the other wasn’t Han Jungho himself, but I’d never seen this guy without his master.

“What’s going on?” I asked. Apprehension washed over me. My parents had confirmed that the debt had been closed out. Surely they hadn’t gotten themselves into more?! “Why are you here?”

“Don’t worry,” said the gangster. “We’re not here for your parents. We’re here for you.”

“I don’t owe you or your boss anything,” I said. I tried to get around them, but the one who hadn’t been talking stepped out in front of me. I stopped. As much as I had learned from Taejun these past few months, I didn’t feel confident taking on two full sized gangsters at the same time.

“No. You don’t,” said Number 1. “But he’s interested in you anyway. He’s been looking for you since he found out that you used to be friends with his son.”

What did Sungmin have to do with anything? I hadn’t wronged Sungmin. I’d even given him his damn package instead of turning him in the moment I got it.

“He likes your grit,” the gangster continued. “And, he knows that you don’t mind breaking a few rules to get shit done. So he wants you to work for him. Or his son.”

Horror shot through me. “Never,” I said. “I’ll never join your gang.” I cut off Sungmin and the Tigers because I learned that Sungmin was in the Seven Directions gang. What in the world made them think I’d ever consider joining their gang?!

“Relax,” the gangster said. “You don’t need to go around shaking down people. You’re no muscle guy, that much is obvious. You can work with your friend on the easy stuff, like you used to.”

“It was one time,” I growled. “And I wouldn’t have done it if Sungmin told me what I was picking up.”

The gangster chuckled. “And yet you brought it back to our little Sungy. You even let him off the hook instead of turning him in.”

I bristled. “I can still do that,” I threatened, even though it was an empty threat. Sungmin might be a dealer, but he was also my friend. I would never turn in a friend, no matter how heinous of a crime he had committed. “Your entire gang seems to have forgotten who my brother is. You of all people should remember.”

The man who Taejun had shot before chuckled, but there was a hard, malicious edge to that laugh. “No,” he chuckled. “No, we haven’t. It’s the only reason you’ll be walking away from us today.”

He nodded to his friend, who stepped aside to let me pass at last. I didn’t hesitate. I walked past them quickly, wanting to leave them and this odious conversation behind as soon as possible.

“You’ll come around,” the gangster called after me. The confidence in his voice chilled me. I didn’t care if I looked like a coward. I ran.

The entire way home, I debated with myself whether or not I should tell Taejun what had happened on my visit home. Not for the first time, I wished there was someone I could ask for advice about these things. It had always been difficult for me to talk about my problems, even with the Tigers. But, even when their advice didn’t pan out, my friends had always given me support and reassurance. Now I didn’t even have that.

Maybe I needed to start thinking of my brother as a friend, not just my overbearing older brother, I realized suddenly. I turned over the situation in my head. He might be angry that my friend had turned out to be Han Jungho’s son, but even I hadn’t known. I would tell him, I thought to myself.

“Something happened on my visit home today,” I said to Taejun.

“Tell me about it in English,” he said distractedly.

“I can’t,” I insisted. “I don’t know how.”

The edge in my voice must have alarmed him because Taejun’s gaze turned to me and he swapped back to Korean. “What happened?” he asked.

In a rush, I told him about Han Jungho’s underling showing up and telling me Han Jungho wanted me to work for him. My brother tensed immediately, and a deep furrowed crease in his brow appeared. I tried to cut out why they wanted me to do so, but it didn’t slip past Taejun.

“It’s a big jump in reasoning thinking that you driving fast in the streets translates well to you becoming a full fledged gangster,” he said, in a low and rigid voice. “Gangs don’t just go around recruiting anyone.”

I was silent but I should have known better than to underestimate Taejun. “Does the gang’s interest in you have something to do with why you suddenly stopped racing?” he asked steadily.

I struggled with whether or not I should answer.

“Jae, I won’t understand the situation unless you tell me everything. Please. I won’t get angry,” my brother said gently. I decided to trust him.

“One of my teammates was Han Jungho’s son,” I admitted. “I didn’t know. I left as soon as I found out.”

Taejun’s jaw clenched, but true to his word, he didn’t become angry. I could still tell though that the news was as upsetting to him as it had been for me. “You knew Han Sungmin?” Taejun asked.

“How do you know his name?!”

“I’ve been keeping tabs on Han Jungho,” Taejun replied.

“Is the NIS investigating him?” I asked.

“Not just him,” he replied. “The Seven Directions gang has been under investigation for some time now.” Taejun was grinding his teeth. “Do you know if his son was involved with the gang?”

I looked at him in alarm. “He’s my friend,” I said. “I won’t rat on my friend.” Too late, I read that my resistance had already given away the truth to Taejun. “Hyung,” I pleaded. “Sungmin has nothing to do with the gang.”

I could tell he didn’t believe me.

“That’s not important right now,” he said, abruptly changing the subject. “I think you should stop visiting back home, and avoid going into Outer Seoul entirely.”

“What about our mom and dad?” I asked in a panic. “It’s clear the gang knows where they live.”

“Did the gang threaten you or them?”

“No,” I admitted. I told him about how they were hesitant to coerce me because he was my brother.

He exhaled, but it didn’t sound like it was one of relief. “Then it’s not likely they’ll do anything to them. I can still put in a request with local police enforcement to keep tabs on them but without any provable threat and without them being able to provide usable evidence against the gang, I won’t be able to put them into an official protection program.”

“What about the time you tried to send me to Beijing?! Can’t you do something similar?”

“That was a different situation,” Taejun said coolly. “There was a clear threat of retaliation.”

“Then why were you so ok with me wandering on the streets of Seoul?” I asked. I’d always wondered why he had dropped the topic of Beijing.

“I couldn’t even find you. Han Jungho had even less of a chance,” he replied. “But I knew you met up with him.”

“So you knew I was paying off the debt?!” I was in disbelief.

“I found it out later. I didn’t know what sort of deal you had worked out with him, but I determined that he was no longer targeting you,” Taejun admitted. “And after I met your friends, I knew generally where you were.”

“Were you tracking Eunsoo and Ryu?!” I exclaimed.

“Just Choi Eunsoo. And now that you’re back, I’m not anymore,” Taejun said. Fair enough. Honestly if you knew where one was, the other was probably close by— wait that didn’t make it ok at all?! Here I thought this guy was actually busy. Clearly he had a lot of time on his hands to stalk me and my friends.

“Were they also in the gang?” my brother asked.

“No!” I exclaimed. At least I was pretty sure not. Eunsoo and Ryu seemed to believe that Hoojin and Sungmin were small-time dealers. “Stop. You’re turning this conversation into an investigation,” I accused.

“It’s important for me to know, especially if you’re still in contact with them,” Taejun said reasonably.

“I’m not,” I grumbled. I mean, I technically had their contact info, but I wasn’t in contact with them.

“I’m sorry,” Taejun said, reading my unhappy expression. “But I think you know why I can’t help being a little suspicious.”

“I just wanted to ask you what to do,” I said miserably.

Taejun looked a little guilty. I knew how hard it was for Taejun to shake off his constant work. Maybe he didn’t mean to slip into interrogation mode. “There isn’t much we can do,” he admitted. “But the good news is that it doesn’t seem like they’ll resort to using force. So the best thing to do for now is to keep avoiding making contact with the gang. Stay in Inner Seoul. If a second incident occurs, I want you to let me know as soon as possible. A second incident might be grounds for relocation.”

I didn’t argue with him over relocation this time. Like I said, I no longer had anything binding me to Seoul.