A searing pain rips through me. Like a hand on a hot stove, but through all of my being. The screams are multiplying and getting louder. I have lost count of the different voices. In between the waves of torturous pain, more voices can be heard.

My thoughts are hard to hold on to... It feels like the time between thoughts is lengthening.

“Why did you leave me Susan?”

Who's Susan?

“You all will see!”

See what? I don't Understa-

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Fuck, that one was me. I can't tell how long I have been here, but it's gotta be the better part of a year. I must be losing it. I can't sleep, but I have blacked out. It was scary at first, but I pray that I black out again sooner than later.

Oh God, another wave!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Fuck, this one has flashes.

Who is this Lady, and why are you showing m-?

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

So much rage.

I can't... hold on...

-----

Ugh... I guess I blacked out...

“What a strange soul”

More voices? Let's brace for pain.

“Hohoho, it's aware! Give me one moment, strange thing.”

That's a first. Sounded like it actually responded to us.

“Alright, this should do it.”

A pinhole of light appears. Can I call it seeing? But a whiteness spreads out from the single point. As it expands, the white light around the edges sharply turned blue. As it expanded, the blue fully encompassed everything except for the window of white light. As our sight adjusted, I looked down and saw a... smoky body? It looks like a deep darkness, something in which light does escape, coupled with streaks of red appearing and disappearing from time to time. It looked like the smoke from dry ice constantly being emitted, but with a dark grey tinge. The shape of the body, though vague, felt familiar.

“WOW, just like that you were able to give yourself form” the person in front of me said.

Were we not always like this?

“You were just... best I could describe... a thundercloud. Also… I would be a god”

Our sight adjusted. Looks to be a figure that looks human, but... I don't know if it is the light, but we can't quite grasp their features and hold them in our mind.

“Yes, that's what seems to happen to everything I seem to be in charge of. You won't be able to comprehend my stunning figure. Totally normal and nothing to worry about."

Ugh... What has happened?

“Before I answer that. I want to know what you know! What should I call you?”

What should we be called? Suddenly voices shouted.

“Susan”

“Te'garath”

“Andy”

“Elizabeth, but I go by Liz”

The person in front of me frowns, “That's far to many names all at once. Would you be able to narrow it down a bit for me?”

Wait... what has happened to me. How long have I been using the terms "us" and "we" when referring to just me, what is happening here?

“Hohoho, you may be the most interesting thing that's ever come up from there.”

I am tired of this... Can you stop playing this pronoun game. Where is here, where did I come from? WHAT THE HELL IS HAPPENING?

I notice my body's red streaks flashing faster and longer.

“Fair enough. The one that's speaking to me right now... your thoughts are reminiscent of Earth, would that be correct”

Of Earth? Of course!

“What's Earth?”

“Gel is where I am from”

“Maybe, I don't remember!”

Shut Up! I push down the other voices.

*Ding*

“I believe then you are aware of the energy of conservation that one of your scientists came up with. You guys where a bit wrong, but close enough for me to use to explain. When a soul is created, it starts off strong, and full of energy. Each soul runs its course and when it’s time is over in the physical world, I offer the souls an option. Either retire, or be sent back and be reincarnated.”

Retired? What does that mean? Does that mean Heaven?

“Errrm… It's a bit hard to explain, but essentially... Your soul 's energy is broken down to the base fragments. Once it’s in it’s base fragments, they, and a few other souls are fuzed together to create something new.”

Isn't that death?

“That's what most souls say... but you aren't dying, your very essence is being used to create something different. Isn't that wonderful!?”

Sounds like 2 terrible decisions. I assume with reincarnation, we forget everything about ourselves when it happens? Otherwise I am sure at some point someone on Earth would have been reincarnated and told everyone about it?

“Yes, you are generally right!”

So basically it is death either way I look at it...

“You people on Earth are always like this!” The god pouts and puffs up what resembles cheeks. “No wonder you people are stuck in a Tier 4 Universe”

Tier 4?

“Nevermind that. All this aside, you are something completely different. I don't even think I could call you a soul.” They pause a moment.

“You see, as I was saying, a Soul's energy can start to waiver. Energy does not get destroyed, but it can be redistributed. Finding what you enjoy causes a soul to get nourishment from its surroundings and objects of affection.” They pause yet again. The god clearly sees that I am struggling with this concept.

“Dogs live shorter lifespans than cats. Correct?”

I guess? I never checked.

“Well, generally they do. It is partially due to biology, but also because of compatibility, and the nature of souls. Dog owners enjoy the company of the dogs more regularly than cat owners to cats. A dogs soul is more… giving, while a cat’s soul is a bit more... guarded. This means a person’s soul will end up taking in more energy from the dog, and the dog dies faster. It's sometimes why wild dogs, or grizzly old dogs seem to live longer. It also helps that cat owners tend to get more than one cat and spread the load so it's not as apparent.”

So I am supposed to believe souls drain energy around them when they are enjoying things? All our pets that we keep and enjoy, we siphon from them?

The god frowns a bit.

“Yes, but think of it a bit more focused on the object/person/place of the enjoyment..”

“If it helps a bit more, you should have noticed that when one member of an older couple dies, the other tends to follow suit shortly. It’s because usually the soul energy had stabilized between the two people, so when one dies, the other is not too far away.”

I get that, but what does that mean to me?

“A soul is a complicated thing. Pure energy is grossly misrepresenting it. That energy though, it can be twisted and shaped. At some point though, if the soul gets to be too weak, key aspects of it are damaged and it passes the tipping point of a healthy soul. That is when a soul looks to destroy itself of its own volition. If suicidal thoughts start occuring, then it’s not too late, but the soul needs assistance, it needs help. If the soul does not seek help, those fragments of soul we talked about with reforging, those are damaged beyond repair.”

What about suicide from duty, or self-sacrafice?

“Those are external forces, whether it be of a sense of duty, society, or a love for others. The soul that is forever damaged is one that wants to be destroyed for the sake of being destroyed or can no longer find value in itself. No other reason.”

So my soul is damaged and no longer has any value?

“Correct... it was in “Damaged Souls” Space. Surprisingly, Earth nailed it pretty well with the description of Purgatory... except we 'burn' all souls in purgatory for energy for the next universe creation.” They used their fingers for scare quotes.

So why am I here? Would you normally talk to a damaged soul like me?

I notice some more red becoming clearer on my body. My rage and frustration are building faster with every long winded explanation I receive. Please get to the point.

“Calm down! I was getting to that. Mortals are always in such a rush!” The god waggles his finger at me.

I wish I could snap it.

“It was my turn to purge the souls. To my surprise, all the souls that should be deteriorated and damaged were gone, all that was in there was you. There should have been thousands, but it was just you, you that I pulled out of there. You awoke on your own,and you even shaped yourself into this humanoid figure. It's very unusual.” The god starts to rock on their chair.

“I suppose I should first offer you a choice. First, did you want to be used to forge a new universe, one in which many worlds will live and flourish through you, or would you like to be reincarnated?”

Are you stupid? I want to be reincarnated!

“I suppose that makes sense. Souls seem really adverse to losing the ability to be self aware... Alright, it's been decided! You will be reincarnated.”

Great! When I get back I am going to murder all those that looked down on me and watch the li- was I ever extreme before? Sure I was spiteful, but murder is a bit intense. Also, I never wanted to snap someone's finger off….

“Ohhhhh no no no no no! You are not going back to Earth. You would throw the entire balance off. A tier 4 would not handle that well. Also, that's the world I am maintaining, I can barely keep up with you guys killing each other off as fast as you do. Throwing a wild card like you in the mix isn’t going to help. Not going to happen, not at all. We are going to pick another world for you to invade... I mean reincarnate into.” An evil grin appears on their face.

Are gods like this allowed to have an evil grin?

“It's not evil... I am just happy to find you a new life!”

Unconvincing.

They clearly frown.

“No I really am excited for you. I am sure everyone will be interested in seeing what you become. You are such a strange specimen. As a sign of my support, let me gift you with this latent ability.”

Latent Ability?

“It will stop anyone from reading your mind or delving into your soul, sounds like a pretty good ability, right?”

The god looks to be really excited.

It’s to stop any other god from reading my mind right? So no one knows I was your doing, am I right?

The god stops in their tracks…

“No…..not that at all....”

It clearly was.

“Like it or not, it’s my gift to you” They recollect themselves.

“I am going to send you to a Tier 2 world. I don’t know what kind of world it will be, but I suspect your growth rate will be something to watch.”

So am I going to be a baby? How will I know the language?

“Ohhhh, well here’s the cool thing. I am going to do a quick swap of a soul that’s just committed an act of self destruction, and no one should be the wiser."

But what about the language, people who I should know, and a bit about the culture?

“Hush hush, don’t worry about all the nitty gritty. It will be great. You will be alive, and we will be able to see… what... you are.” At this point the god is busy working something else out.

“One moment.” The god muttered under his breath.

Then he disappeared. Not in a puff of smoke, or when I blinked he was gone, but like he never existed before.

“Alright, here it is. I bestow upon you my latent power to you. Mind Immunity and Soul Resistance. No longer shall anyone be able to peer into your Mind, and this should protect your soul from any curious lookers. Do be prepared to be an even more curious specimen though because of this.”

*Ding*

*Ding*

The gods voice fills the room, but has no discernable source. It’s unsettling.

“Any last questions?”

Soft Jazz starts playing in my head.

Of course I do! Don’t leave me in the lurch, what’s this world like? Can I have a look at other-

“Seriously, any questions? I know you must have a lot before I send you off”

The soft Jazz plays a bit louder and increases tempo a bit.

Can you not hear me?

“Oh, I guess your latent powers have already taken hold. I suppose I won’t be able to read your mind anymore. Hohoho, you won’t be able to respond to me anymore. Hohoho, isn't that ability great!”

Such a shitty god.

Could he not have given me a voice before this?

Could this power being active not be controlled by me?

I suppose though, other than the option of being blown up and used for star dust or some other nonsense, this was the only option really available for me.

“Alright, I picked a perfect time for you. Here we go! I won’t be able to do much on my end, but I will give you a bit of a chance to recover. Don’t mess this up otherwise you might end back in the hole. You were in there for around 609 years. At least I think I am right. Linear time is always so confusing for me.”

Wait, I spent 609 years in that hell hole? How long was I conscious for that?

My thoughts went on to deaf ears. The white room disappeared such as the god did, leaving just a space devoid of light, yet for some reason the blue around my vision stayed. The same sensations quickly emerged from my time in the box and I can feel the panic swelling up.

All the voices came back up. The screamers, the talkers, all at once.

This time though, on top of everything else, soft Jazz starts playing again.

I am in Hell, no doubt