You have been reborn as Drunkard A.

…Ok. That obviously wasn’t what I imagined, but it’s still better than Fork A or Cup A.

And no, I’m not in tears already because I know that I’m going to lose. I’m just sweating. A lot. The good type of sweat, by the way. Not the “shit, I’m outta here” sweat, but the “ho ho ho boi, Imma beat yo arse” type. Excited? Absolutely, yes! I love getting my a** kicked by a random person I just met, yep!

…

Your goal is to get even more drunk than you are right now.

Ok, Shin. Think about it this way. What if you can power up through getting more drunk? You know, there’s always this sketchy drunk guy in animes, who gets insanely strong after he drinks whatever he drinks. Remember? There’s this really popular manga on Shounen Jump, damn that mangaka, about this drunk guy who goes on a journey for world domination with a beer bottle…

Iamd Runk: I am the divine messenger from the Beer God, here to conquer the world and spread the teachings of the Drunkard.

Side Character A: No, we shall stop you!

Side Character B: Chargeeee!!!

Iamd Runk: …It can’t be helped. Begone, you sober fools! Drunk-no-jutsu!

*A giant crater appears on the world map. To be continued.*

Um. Just from how incredibly popular that manga is, you can tell that the moral of the story is legitimate. Plus, that manga is still “ongoing,” while mine is about to get axed. It’s obvious that I was wrong to think that drunk guys are useless! Drunkards are overpowered, just give them a drink.

Yep, a drink…

I grabbed a cup of whatever I could find on the table beside me.

Now, the moment of truth has dawned. Behold, the new and improved Shin! Watch out, 007, Beerzilla is coming for you!

I smirked as I gulped down the liquid, all at once.

…

Blehhhhhhh!!!

Blast! It was the tuna-water from earlier!

Water…normal water…

I grabbed a cup of clear liquid that was sitting on the counter, gulping it down in a hurry.

…

I spat it out immediately.

“It’s brussels sprout and mushroom-monster juice.” the old man bartender said, unfazed by the chaos around him.

…

What about this!

I grabbed another cup, with the same result.

“Singing frog lemonade.”

This!

“Dancing crab cocktail.”

…

Then…what. about. THIS!

I gulped down the contents of the last cup on the counter, mentally prepared to spit it all out.

…

Hey…this is surprisingly good.

“…” I opened my mouth to say something, and then remember the one-line rule.

Wait, Shin. Don’t say anything here, you can’t waste your line right now. As random A, you only have one line per role, you need to save it for when you actually confront the main character.

I nodded to myself.

I gestured to the bartender, and then to the cup. Then, I held up my hand in an “ok” sign.

You. Cup…Ok? I said to him in my mind.

The bartender seemed to understand my intentions. He took a bottle of something off from the shelf behind him, opening the cork.

He poured me one-fourth of the cup.

…

What a penny-pincher.

I cleared my throat, and he looked up at me.

I pointed to the bottle, then to the cup, then rubbed my fingertips together.

Bottle. Cup. Money.

He gave me a weird look.

“Are you sure?”

Positive.

I held up the “ok” sign again.

He poured me some more. Now the liquid is at the half-point.

…

I repeated my signals. He poured me some more.

And again.

And again.

Finally, the cup was completely filled.

I raised the cup to him in salute.

Cheers! I said in my mind, as I downed the liquid in one go.

He watched me in silence, then began to clap slowly.

Hmph. That was nothing! I thought confidently, grinning like I’ve just won a marathon.

Back up A, B, C, D, E has been defeated by [Scarlet 007].

The system interrupted my thoughts all of a sudden.

I couldn’t help but smirk evilly.

Heh heh heh heh…Just as planned.

I walked away from the counter, stopping a short distance behind the main character.

He stopped moving, most likely sensing that I was behind him.

Alright, it’s time to make my appearance! I could already feel my power level rise…what is this strange new feeling? I feel so weightless, my head and body feels so light! Wait, what is this surge of heat that is engulfing my form? Is this the ultimate transformation I am experiencing right now? Did I just turn from Nob!ta to [email protected]?

I smirked, grabbing the empty beer bottle on the table beside me.

Now, I will say my line. What sounds more cool, “I shall blast you away with my drunk-no-jutsu,” or, “Prepare to taste the might of the ultimate beer bottle?”

…

Whatever, I’ll just fit both into one sentence.

I pointed my beer bottle at his back, opening my mouth to speak the earth-shattering lines that will forever change history.

“Yo, you there, I shall-”

Before I could finish my sentence, I fell to the ground, knocked out.

…

“The strongest-blend of Tequilla here is indeed too strong for a regular customer. I shall have to take it off the menu after all.”

In my knocked-out state, I could still hear the bartender speak.

Damn you, old man! How dare you poison me! And wait, why haven’t I died and reincarnated yet?

You have entered a [Semi-conscious] state. You will remain as Drunkard A.

What the heck!? How am I supposed to observe the MC, never mind taking notes, if I can’t even see him!?

007 remained silent.

The bartender picked up a wine glass, then proceed to wipe it calmly.

“Who exactly are you.” the main character eventually asked, his voice icy-cold.

“Just a regular old man who earns a living through bartending.” the bartender replied, not one bit frightened by his tone.

Yeah right, you poison-con-artist.

“Your aura is not one of just an ordinary man.”

Damn straight, you go boi!

“And you, young man, are not a regular customer either.”

Obviously! Didn’t you see him wreck those macho guys earlier? It’s called mad skills, mad skills I say…even though I obviously didn’t see it happen because I was too busy trying not to get killed by flying tables…but you get the point!

“Aren’t we then, both playing out pointless roles?”

The old man paused for a moment, and then smiled.

“You may be right.”

He gently placed the wine glass down on the counter, and then-

Master Zen of the [Midnight Raven] syndicate has entered the battle!

You go, MC! Take that scammer down, don’t go easy on him just because he’s an old man! He- …Wait, “Master Zen!?” He has a name!? Then, that means…

The old man smiled again.

“Your last opponent is me.”

To be continued…

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Note: Last update for tonight! I will update a lot more as soon as I wake up tomorrow.