《Hope: The Beast Mistress》14. Hopeless Hope
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Darkness grazed the grass on the edge of the scorched village. Drake and Hope sat for a while, looking at him. The scene was gorgeous, with the black stallion on the lush meadow and the darker green forest behind it. They both knew that the view was entirely different if they would dare to turn around and look back at the destroyed village.
Hope still hadn't said a word, but at least now she was walking and behaving seemingly normal, just a little upset, but with a stern expression. Drake got on the horse and reached out to help her up. The girl hesitated for a moment, then raised her hand but did not take Drake's hand, touching Darkness's head instead. The horse let out a painful and scared neigh and ran away. Drake barely kept his balance when the stallion took off.
The black horse lowered his head and became completely aerodynamic, increasing his speed with each passing moment. He seemed to be fleeing as if his life depended on it and headed straight for the forest. Drake realized this was his only chance to jump off the horse if he wanted to stay with Hope. He didn't think again and didn't hesitate. He plummeted on the grass, and although it was relatively soft, he felt a sharp pain in his ribs, shoulder, and nape when he rolled over.
Drake got up with difficulty and saw Hope entering the forest on the other side of the grassy field. He walked slowly after her, holding his ribs with his left hand while his right hand was inert. It seemed strange to Drake that he did not want to kill her for what she had done. He did not feel the slightest criminal intent. His whole being understood her and realized that he would have done the same. He would have wanted to be alone with his pain, cry, scream, release his suffering without spectators.
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But he couldn't leave her alone. He knew that dark place she was going to now, and he knew there wasn't a way out of there without getting a little help. Pain and sorrow filling your soul are like banishing you to a forsaken land where you can see only your darkest features. Every person has a dark side, even the best of them all, even Hope.
As he entered the forest, he began to hear wailings. He followed the cries and found Hope in the same position as yesterday, only this time leaning on an old tree. Drake didn't know if she noticed him or not. Hope was talking, but not to him. She was unloading her burden.
"I am angry because I am powerless. I refrain from destroying everything in my path, from killing every person I see. All the anger builds up inside, and I feel like it's going to explode if I hold it back any longer."
The strong woman he once thought resembled a tornado was still there, but now, she was transformed into an unstoppable cataclysmic apocalyptic event.
Her face was a grimace of anger and hate, gritting her teeth so loudly that Drake could clearly hear the gnashing from a few feet away. Hope continued screaming. "I want the tension that builds up inside me to explode; I want it to go boom and scatter my brains all over the place. I see this scene in my mind, and I'm happy! "
Tears welled up on her chin and continued to flow, even as she began to laugh loudly and forcefully. "I am laughing! Because when I die, I won't feel powerless! "
Drake was amazed at how much she resembled him. He had been in the same state, discussing with himself in the past, and then ended up in this same situation. He couldn't allow Hope to get to the same inescapable point.
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The girl's laughter subsided. Now she was crying and smiling sadly. "I am a fool because I care. Nothing in this world matters. Everything is irrelevant because it is ephemeral; everything goes away; everything disappears. This is the design of creation. And then why should I care? Why care about something or someone?"
Drake approached and sat down next to her, leaning against the same tree as her without saying anything. All he had to do at the moment was give her enough space to dump her suffering, yet knowing she wasn't alone.
Max and Josephine slowly approached with sadness pouring out of their eyes, seeing Hope. Josephine jumped on her shoulder, and Max lay with his head on Hope's lap.
The girl began to cry again, even louder this time and a shadow of disdain and anger clouded her face. "Do you know that when I got home, I wanted to go in? I opened the door even though the doorknob was locked and hot, and I had to push with both hands. Then I saw her… I wanted to go inside after her, but Max grabbed my clothes and wouldn't let me go. The first thought that crossed my mind was to order him to enter first."
There was a long silence in which Hope seemed lost in memories and pain again, but suddenly she continued. "If I had done that, I would have hated myself for eternity. But I still loathe myself for thinking about it. The mere fact that it occurred to me to do something like that makes me a vile person. "
Drake sensed a new feeling creeping deep into the essence of his being. A new one that he had never felt before. Admiration. Because at that moment, he saw for the first time that there is strength in weakness, happiness in suffering, hope in sorrow.
She didn't need words; she was the one who had to speak her mind, casting out all the pain, in need to understand her grief. So he offered her the only thing she needed. Drake got up a little and slowly hugged her tightly with his left arm because the right one was still numb, kissing her on the forehead and whispering. "Oh, my hopeless Hope ..."
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