It was massive, much larger than a regular egg. I suppose that was to be expected from a dragon’s egg. The dense shell was flaxen, speckled with light blue drips.

“Bewitching.” Degard wheezed, without taking his eyes off the prize.

He clutched onto it with his frail, wrinkled hands. It was neither matte nor glossy, ambient light from the torch in my hand seemed to be both reflected and be absorbed in equal measure. The egg that is, not Degard. The torchlight seemed to actively avoid him.

He was a strange man. A smelly man - and not in the good way. A walking warning sign about the dangers of incompetent necromancy if ever I’d seen one.

By his own reckoning he would have been thirty-one seasons old. Yet, his feeble body was more like that of a seventy-year-old farmer whose life had involved hard manual labour.

It was to be expected I suppose. The arcane realm is unforgiving. It will take more than its fair share from those with a weak disposition. Much more. If you then start sprinkling in a bit of special sauce from the domain of death, you’re practically inviting trouble in for afternoon tea.

As if to stereotype the creepy necromancer myth, Degard was hunched over, draped in a ragged cloak from head to toe. It was torn in places that I dared not question and while originally black, it had been sun bleached to the point of looking muggy grey.

“At last, the final piece of the puzzle.” He continued, coughing between every other word. “My malignant Lord provides.” He coughed again, glancing towards me in a clear show of one upmanship.

“Whatever you say.” I replied, taking an uneasy glance around the dimly lit cave. As I stomped my feet in a feeble attempt to shake of the moisture, a crunching sound echoed throughout the cave with each downward blow.

My new leather boots had been soiled by whatever lukewarm liquid had seeped in and I’m pretty sure I had a good idea of what the crunching was.

Getting into this lair was easy. Way too easy. It was unsettling.

The cave had been practically unguarded. You would typically expect there to be a clan of dragon worshipping goblins taking up residence close to their deity. But no.

There were no signs of mummy dragon either.

In fact, the only signs of life - beside the insects - were a couple human dragon worshippers. Hardly a challenge. I had made short work of these with a simple curse from the forbidden athenaeum. They were now resting in pools of crimson chunks near the entrance.

“Let’s get out of here. This place gives me the creeps.”

Degard let out a disgusting chuckle. “Fear not, warlock. I am chosen by the Dark Lord.” He rattled.

Behind him, two glowing amber oval shapes appeared. You can probably, guess where this is going.

“This sacrifice will ensure…” Degard began his tangent. Something, something ‘Dark Lord’. My attention was focused elsewhere.

EEEEEEEEK.

A formidable squeal reverberated around the cave. The sheer force of the sound wave pushed me backwards and I had to dig in my heels and stiffen my spine.

Degard normally walked with the support of an antique wooden stave, but he had dropped it to cup the egg with his hands and gloat. As a result, he stumbled sideways several steps in an uneasy shuffle.

I held out my arm to stop him from blowing away, holding on to his greasy cape.

When the squeal had subsided, I pushed him back towards his previous place with more force than necessary.

“My thanks.” Degard muttered, eying me up and down with his dirt-coloured eyes.

“No problem.” I smiled and stepped backwards whilst the old crone continued to look towards me.

As if he hadn’t learned his lesson, he began another tangent. Thankfully, the giant set of teeth that had appeared behind him reached out from the depths of the shadows. The initial blow tore him in half, saving us all from his monotonous tone and leaving only a pair of legs. I dropped the torchlight and stepped backwards.

“Clever girl.”

A wave of flames erupted from the darkness in my direction engulfing the wall of mana encircling my body.

Thankfully my mana shield held, diverting the worst of the damage that the overgrown lizard felt the need to spew in my direction.

Shamelessly I turned and ran down the mound of bones that the egg altar stood upon. I slipped, sliding down my arse most of the way.

A squeal with much more ferocity than the first was unleashed. The shear malicious force sent rocks and stalagmites flying across the cave indiscriminately.

Loose flying shrapnel tore through my right thigh, and I instinctively winced in response.

I continued limping towards the sweet sanctity of daylight that was bleeding in from the entrance. As the light grew closer, I slipped again, falling for what felt like an eternity and slipping into unconsciousness.

***

Darkness was everywhere when I awoke. A searing pain shot through my lower thigh reminding me of my exploits. Looking - or rather feeling around - whilst my eyesight adjusted to the dark, it was clear that I landed in some kind of thorned shrubbery.

This wasn’t good. I needed to get out of here. There was a rustling behind me. Turning, I could see a large grey-haired rabbit. I let out a tutting sound and encouraged it in, curling my fingers towards me.

“Here wabbit, wabbit. Come on.”

The creature sniffed the air, looked about and took a tentative hop towards me.

“That’s it. You can do it.”

Another sniff. A hop sideways, then backwards, clearly unimpressed by my wooing.

Eventually it turned around, hopping close enough for me to reach out and grab the grey-haired bastard. It struggled for a few seconds, but I gave a soothing stroke, and the creature became calm.

As I patted the creature, I could feel the warmth emitting from its lifeforce. Focusing on the creatures lifeforce, I attuned myself, before injecting a little mana into the creature and began manipulating it. It circulated around the body of the rabbit, from brain to heart and everything in between.

I pulled my mana back. It’s a lot like fishing really, you know when you have a bite because there is a little resistance when you tug. Mentally pulling I leeched the creatures lifeforce to augment my own and began feeding on its misery.

The rabbit shuddered in agony, limbs flying outwards in protest. I continued to drain everything I could. The more I devoured, the weaker the protests, until eventually they ceased completely.

Then I ate the little bugger.

Revitalised from my physical and spiritual nourishment, I stepped out from the safety of the shrubbery. Standing tall, I straightened my black tunic. I brushed off the dust that had dirtied the golden trims of the Royal Academy professors uniform.

I pulled up and tightened my ivory leather belt. Dusted of the pointed wizards hat and placed on my head, covering my blonde hair.

I focused, summoning a strong mana shield. I had survived. Again.

Turning, I smiled.

Suddenly, flames licked the shield but were reflected outwards, scorching everything within the vicinity, insect or foliage, indiscriminately. I twisted my neck and blew a raspberry from within the safety of my translucent boiled egg. Then I ran like hell.

The acrid smell of sweat and smoke seemed to waft around my little bubble, increasing in intensity after each circulation like a fart trapped in a bottle. It stung my nostrils. Somehow the smell itself seemed hot. Acidic.

Shit, this was not the plan.

The loose dirt beneath my feet was unstable as I continued to run. My heart skipped a beat each time I had to style out a slip.

Focusing on channelling all my mana into replenishing the shield was a difficult task. Through gritted teeth, I continued to focus, redirecting any unused brain power to the lifesaving barrier. Bowel control? A luxury.

Ancient, twisted limbs covered most of the forest and were distinctive tripping hazards. These tendrils reached out, claiming the land and intertwining with one another.

Ahead, a clearing appeared. Daylight forced its way through a gap between two trees. I needed to get back to open ground. Quickly.

Whilst I managed - somehow - to have kept ahead of the stinking snake dog on my heels, the enclosed space of the forest offered little to no protection. If anything, all the bloody trees it was knocking down were just as much a danger as the beast itself.

I chanced a glance back, half hoping she had given up the chase. Still infuriate by indignant rage that we had dared to steal her eggs, the scaly beast snapped at my heels like a dog with a silent bark.

Rows of teeth the size of my fist flashed before my eyes, accompanied by a shower of drool that smeared against the shield.

No this wouldn’t do. I needed to get out of this damn forest.

A deafening roar was unleashed, stripping bark from trees within my peripheral and throwing me a good twelve feet forward.

Luckily, I landed on my feet with the grace of a crusty turd. None the less, the bitch may have just given me the chance I needed to escape. That extra space would give me just enough time to…

In the sky ahead explosions of red, blue and purple light littered the sky. A signal to our soldiers?

Thank the gods.

Using the extra space afforded to me by the dragon, I continued towards the clearing, aiming in the direction of the signal. As I got closer, I could make out shapes on the plane beyond.

If I could reach the soldiers perhaps the dragon would be enticed by a meatier target, leaving me to make my undignified escape.

That sounded like an idea.

Suddenly, the earth trembled, and another roar was unleashed. This one I was more familiar with. A ball of fire, ignited by mana was soaring towards me in blue flame.

Were they trying to kill me?

The shape grew larger at a terrifying pace. Instinctively, I flicked my wrist at the approaching ball of energy just in time to adjust the trajectory. The missile ricocheted 40 degrees and cracked through the trees to my right.

Before I had time to give myself a pat on the back a second ball appeared. Again, I deflected the ball of energy, this time to the left.

The second ball was a lot closer, but I still escaped unhurt. I could hear more creaks and cracks from the forest as I continued to run.

As the opening grew closer, the shapes became more distinct. I could make out a dozen or so soldiers approaching.

The grey uniforms of the local guard were practical but unstylish. A crop local to the region was spun into looms of a light cotton-like material. This material was used to create the long coats and matching pants that the soldiers wore. Their belts and strapping were made of some sort of brown leather.

“That.. That.. Was.. Amazing.” A young soldier proclaimed, staring at me with fear.

“Move aside!” I screamed, running through the group, pushing several soldiers aside with magic.

When I reached the opening a cheer erupted.

“That was incredible master.” Asha said.

She was a half-elf mage who had recently become my apprentice. Much to my chagrin.

Asha wore the uniform of a student from the Royal Magic Academy. A regal blue tunic with golden trims, adorned with golden threaded runes. Fiery crimson hair escaped from her pointed matching hat and rested against her dainty shoulders. Her bare legs were exposed from where the pleated skirt and tunic overlapped, and the stockings began. In her left hand she held on to that bloody, magic book.

“The dragon!” I screamed.

“Yes, Master. The way you lured such a dangerous creature.” Asha gestured behind me. “You waited for her to reach some strong trees and instead of killing the beast you manipulated the fireballs to pin it down. A cunning feat.”

Turning around, I could see a pile of collapse trees had fallen onto the dragon, crushing it beneath their mighty trunks.

“I don’t think anyone has ever captured a live dragon before. The King will be most pleased.” She continued.

“Ah yes. Well. That was my plan all along, Asha. I did not wish to endanger the lives of anyone else. Hopefully the secrets this beast hold will serve the kingdom well.” I replied.

“I thought you had been taken by the Dark Legion, my Lord. These were all the troops I could muster. Were the reports false?”

“The Dark Legion are amateur magic users at best.” It was a half-truth. “I destroyed their sinful cabal and ended their leader Degard myself.”

That was an out-right lie. Degard - although a disgusting human by almost any standard - was a useful pawn. Over a period of weeks, I had manipulated him into believing he was a prophet chosen by his God. A little deception and hypnosis went a long way. Especially with idiots.

Thus, the Dark Legion was born. They grew in infamy, stealing all flavours of forbidden knowledge from across the land for their dark God. Also known as… Me.

Asha took a knee before me and bowed her head. “Forgive me, my Lord. I should have expected such tactical mastery from the most powerful Warlock in the Kingdom.”

That, of course wasn’t the complete truth. Nor a half-truth for that matter. I had only recently learned to use magic. You see, my life hadn’t always been so interesting. I had always been a fuck up when I was alive, yet since being reborn in this world, everyone seems to think I’m a hero.