Hmm, this was… unexpected. I had expected to end up in a sealed pocket of space, contained until either it was opened or gave out. That should have meant I was trapped in a warped knot of reality. That… was not what happened. Instead, I ended up in a house. One moment the space I was in was folded out of the classical universe, sealing me into a circular pocket of existence that looked a lot like a multicolored weightless bubble, the next I was sitting at a dining table in a distinctly middle-class looking house. I was also not expecting Marian to be sitting across from me, looking quite confused, or the now intact Mr. Head sitting a few seats down, looking even more confused.

“Hmm, that’s interesting.” At my words, Mr. Head seemed to suddenly snap out of his shock. He bolted up, sending his seat flying away. I watched as he… didn’t start to change. He stood there, muscles tensing as he tried to change his form. “Constipated?” I asked.

“What is this?” He sounded angrily incredulous. I crawled up onto my chair, standing on it.

“Not what it looks like.” I crouched down, snatching up a kitchen knife and dragging it over my palm. With enough force, I managed to make a shallow slash which briefly pooled with reflective golden ichor before it was drawn back in and the cut sealed closed.

The two of them watched as the inhuman non-blood vanished, which made it really easy to throw the knife with my other hand into Mr. Head’s shoulder. To his credit, he tried to lunge at me before even considering doing anything about the knife in his shoulder. Unfortunately for him, he didn’t seem to be quite as athletic as usual, so he ended up tripping over the table and landing on it face first. That managed to drive the knife in farther, which caused him to reflexively roll off of the knife. In fact, he ended up rolling off the table and onto the floor.

I climbed up onto the table and stepped over to the other side, looking down at his sorry state. “You done?” There was a moment as he visibly wrestled with the unexpected pain, before he finally nodded.

“What just happened?” Marian asked, still seated at the table.

I shrugged. “I don’t know.”

She looked at me in disbelief. “I thought you knew everything.”

I rolled my eyes. “I know of many things both great and terrible, the slightest fragment of which would shatter your feeble mortal mind. However, I am not omniscient.” I looked down at Mr. Head again.

“I know that that trap should have twisted off a little pocket of space from the rest of normal physics and trapped us in it for a bit. I do not know why we are in what looks like a dining room, or why he is in a dress.” I gestured down at Mr. Head who was in fact wearing a rather classical dress. It looked like something from back in the 50s, blue with a floral pattern, and was technically in his size. While that was strictly true, it didn’t mean that it really fit his frame.

I, as well as Marian, was also dressed differently. She had ended up in something from a similar era to the dress, some sort of denim skirt thing and something that I was pretty sure was a type of shirt. Unlike Mr. Head, her new outfit fit her perfectly. I, on the other hand, was wearing an old-fashioned suit, one from back when wearing a suit was something men did for day to day activities. Thanks to my current form not being overly curvy, it actually fit pretty well, but it still seemed a little odd.

“This is my house… I mean, my parents old house.” I looked over at Marian.

“Really? From when?” She was looking around in clear confusion.

“I think… I think it’s my childhood house, but… it shouldn’t still look like this.” I glanced around.

“What? Outdated and tacky?” She didn’t respond, instead getting up and wandering around. She looked as if she had finally been faced with something that simply couldn’t be.

After making a full circle of the floor we were apparently on, she returned to the dining room. “It’s my house when I was a child, or maybe a teen.” I frowned, considering.

“Was that an outfit you wore back then?” She nodded, and I looked down at Mr. Head. “So, did you cross dress a lot in your younger years?” He glared up at me.

“No.” He forced out, while he continued to bleed onto the floor.

“Well, I am pretty sure I have never worn a suit, so this seems to really just be your memory.” She examined us, clearly realizing something.

“That’s one of my mom’s dresses.” She pointed at Mr. Head. “And I think that’s one of my dad’s suits.” She pointed at me.

“So, this is a remarkably detailed replica of your childhood, except whoever made it decided we should play your parents?” I looked down at Mr. Head. “And went with rather… bold casting choices.” I hopped off the table, landing on Mr. Head who didn’t react well. Honestly, I stepped off right afterwards.

“So, were you alive when you lived here?” I asked, ignoring Mr. Head’s increasingly delirious groaning. He had a rather impressive pool of blood by now. She nodded, a strange expression on her face. “Okay, so are you alive now?”

Her expression seemed… uncertain. “I think so. I don’t really remember it well, but… I think this is what it felt like.”

I nodded. “So, this whole place seems to be about you, and not recent.” I began to pace, occasionally stepping on the now mostly unconscious Mr. Head.

“That seems to indicate that everything is derived from you and the time you lived here, which would explain why you’re alive, since you were at the time. But, why is he human?” I gestured down at Mr. Head. “It might be because we are supposed to be your parents or be some projected effect from you, but that wouldn’t really explain this.” I pulled the knife out of Mr. Head, causing the bleeding to increase significantly. I think I might have hit something important.

I drove the utensil into my wrist full force, dragging it for maximum effect. It wasn’t exactly designed for this, but it was still quality metal with at least a knife shape. Golden liquid splattered across the carpet, reflecting the sunlight coming in through the window. “Is that liquid gold?” Marian asked. Mr. Head didn’t comment.

“No, it’s divine ichor, the blood of the elohim.” I answered as the droplets began to flow back towards me, striving to return.

“Wasn’t your blood red before?” She asked, watching the migratory droplets.

“Yes, but that’s because I’ve been walking around in a mortal body. This is what it should look like if I was both uncorrupted and living.” The ichor reached my feet in a stream and crawled its way up my shoes and towards bare skin. “I happen to be neither of those things, and that isn’t likely to have changed.” The last of my wayward ichor seeped into my body. I raised my arm, despite the fact that my injury had already healed completely. “This shouldn’t happen.”

She was clearly fascinated by my now healed limb. “Why not? If this could bring me back to life, why couldn’t it do that for you?” I had to laugh at that one.

“It’s a little different. You see, you were only mortal dead. You were still within the heavens and earth. All you have to do to bring someone back from that is fix their body, grab their soul and stick them together.” I made that sound way simpler than it actually was and might have left out the part about there only being a couple people who could technically do it.

“That would be made even easier by the fact that your soul is already tied to your body. It’s really just a matter of moving your metaphysical make up around.” She was looking at me with that expression again.

“Are you claiming you can make a lilin human?” I raised an eyebrow.

“No, of course not. Lilin are already human. They’re just dead humans. But, that’s beside the point. The point is that the elohim aren’t effected by that sort of death.” I stepped up onto Mr. Head for effect, before continuing.

“When one of us dies outside our own domain, we just go back to it and reform. But, I wasn’t killed like that.” I was pretty sure Mr. Head was dead, but figured I would ignore it. “I was killed permanently. That means my soul was consumed, broken down into pure primordial light and added to the power of my murderer.” I could tell that I had lost her, but that really wasn’t the point. “That means that I ceased to exist in the universe, including any after life.” I threw my arms towards the sky, spreading my posture and stepping on Mr. Head’s… well, head.

“Do. You. UNDERSTAND?” I roared to the heavens, deciding to ignore the fact I was only two feet from hitting the ceiling.

There was a long silence. “No… What does that have to do with you having golden blood?” I dropped my arms to my sides and leveled a stare at her.

“It isn’t supposed to make sense, not without me explaining way more than either of us wants. What it does do is mean I shouldn’t be able to have golden ichor, even in a body of incorruptible flesh.” I calmly explained.

I hopped down into the pool of blood. “So, that means two things.” There was a pause.

“And those are?” She finally asked.

“First, this can’t be real. We aren’t physically here, at least not how we think we are. Second, either the creator of all this knows who, or at least what, I was before death, or at least some aspects of this are affected by my mind.” She frowned at that.

“Yeah, you haven’t actually explained who… ur, what you are.” I frowned in response.

“Haven’t I?” I shrugged. “Well, no point starting now. There’s stuff to do.”

Oddly, she crossed her arms. “It seems like you are avoiding the question.” I tilted my head.

“Am I? Isn’t that odd?” I shrugged, watching her reaction. “So, it seems almost like this is supposed to be some sort of spirit quest for you.” She shrugged.

“It looks like it, but why?” I nodded, smiling.

“It’s strange, isn’t it? After all, why would the two of us be here? It’s not exactly something easy to miss. Plus, what would someone even want to guide you to?” I laughed. “It’s almost like they can’t get into my mind and are trying to use your mind to trick me into give something away.”

She laughed back. “That seems a little narcissistic.” I smiled.

“You know it. But, I’m probably just being paranoid. We don’t honestly have anything, so we might as well do something more enjoyable in the meantime.” I let my form flow, flesh reshaping into a far more attractive version of Marcus. The suit changed to fit my new form, which I had nothing to do with. I walked over to the now shorter Marian, moving with a stride crafted for this purpose through millennia of practice. “I think you know what I have in mind.” Her posture change, adapting to match my intent. That told me everything I needed to know.

“You know she isn’t into me?” I asked, right before slamming a palm into her diaphragm. Rather than being torn apart, like a human body should have been, her body didn’t move. Instead, she only crumpled over, nearly falling to the ground.

“Why?” I laughed at the question.

“Why? Because I’m very experienced with humans. I have studied them since the very beginning, and I know when one isn’t themselves.” I grabbed her shoulder, forcibly pulling the not Marian up.

“So, how much of this is real? Did you actually take this from her mind, or just make it up?” I moved her head from side to side. “You got everything visually perfect. But, people are a bit harder.” She didn’t stop me from studying her, instead just scowling. I laughed. “Oh, that’s almost her scowl, almost.” I stepped back, scanning her from head to foot.

“I used the knowledge from the mortals around her.” I raised an eyebrow.

“So, you can read mortal minds, but it doesn’t seem like you can read mine. Can you?” She didn’t respond, but I was fairly confident I was right.

“You want to know things. Well, I like knowing stuff too.” I grinned. “How about we just answer questions until we don’t want more answers, and see how it goes?” She didn’t respond for a long moment before finally nodding.

“That is acceptable.” The world shattered around us, reshaping into a moderately occupied coffee shop. I flopped down into a lounge like chair, unfazed by the change.

“So, who are you?” I asked. A coffee appeared next to my hand, and I reflexively snatched it out of the air.

She manifested one for herself and took a sip before responding. “I am the one charged with protecting the growth of humanity from the threat of the gods. No one has ever given me a name directly, but some of those who observe my work call me The Lady.” I nodded, swirling my drink in contemplation.

“So, does that mean you are the one who makes the mortals oblivious to the divine?” She nodded. “Amongst other duties, I ensure that humanity can function independently of those who are not of them. Including the members that have been contaminated.” I kicked a foot over a chair arm and nodded solemnly.

“So, you are in charge of making everything boring and mundane. May I ask why?” She narrowed her eyes.

“Because it is the purpose I was created for. But, I would like to ask a question.” I waved a hand for her to continue. “You are clearly one of the gods who fell in the war, cast eternally into the outer darkness from which none can return.” I nodded.

“Sounds right.” It wasn’t like I was trying to hide that.

“You are clearly a god of the Adversary.” I raised my coffee.

“What makes you say that?” I threw the still full cup at Mr. Head, who, for some reason, was lying on the floor a few feet away. It splashed on him, washing a very small amount of blood off.

“He’s real, you know?” I turned back to her.

“Yeah, I know.” A coffee cup appeared next to my hand, and I snatched it out of the air again.

“From records, the gods of law were nearly as direct and unimaginative as demons, something you have proven not to be. And the gods of justice were more…” she trailed off as I threw my new coffee. It splashed, and Mr. Head twitched, although he still didn’t seem to be awake.

“That only really leaves the choir of change, which your behavior seems to match perfectly. Hence, you must be of the Adversary’s lineage.” I threw another coffee. “You know, I will stop giving you those.” I turned back to her, deciding to leave Mr. Head to bleed on his own for a while.

“Yes, but why do you care. You seem to have the divine and material worlds pretty separate as is, so how do I change that?” She frowned.

“You are an abomination.” I raised an eyebrow.

“How so?” Her lip twisted, forming an expression of disgust that I hadn’t seen on Marian before.

“You are an invader from beyond, one that disrupted the natural order of creation. Your existence twists the world, potentially leading all of creation into an unnatural state.” I frowned.

“And? I’m a god of entropy and evolution. Twisting the natural order and changing the state of creation is literally why I exist. It’s what I was created for.” Her hand visibly tightened around her cup.

“You do not exist. You no longer belong here. You have no natural purpose.” Well, that seemed uncalled for.

“So, are you going to tell me that the Lightbringer and his demons are a natural part of the order?” This time I was pretty sure her scowl wasn’t directed at me.

“No, they are a crime against creation, but I do not have the power to stop them. I can only interfere.” I nodded.

“So, you are going to say that because I was destroyed by a creature that shouldn’t exist in the natural order, me being here is still against the natural order. In the natural order, I shouldn’t have been able to die, so how can having returned be unnatural?” She shook her head as if I just wasn’t getting it.

“No, it has nothing to do with if you as a living god should be here. The problem is that you are not simply a god. You are a fallen one. A being corrupted by the beyond, who is a path back to the darkness.” She sounded so serious on that one that I decided to do something drastic. I actually drank my coffee.

“Holy SHIT!” I said as soon as I swallowed. “This tastes!” It actually had a taste. Not just the knowledge of chemicals or the flavor of primordial light, but a physical taste, like the ones I had seen in people’s memories. The tension palpably relaxed.

“Yes, I constructed it with the human sense of taste.” I took another sip.

“It isn’t just molecule flavored!” I exclaimed. She frowned.

“Are you referencing Supernatural?” She asked.

“Referencing what?” She shook her head, consciously returning to the topic.

“Regardless of your opinion, I need to know how you got back here so I can undo it and prevent others from achieving the same.” I laughed.

“I don’t think you’re going to get anyone else who did exactly what I did.” She nodded.

“I’m sure, but anything I can learn about how the fallen are created would help me prevent them.” I finished my coffee in one last swig, and sent the cup flying at Mr. Head.

“Well, it has been interesting talking about how you want to kill me and everything, but there is really something you should know about how the fallen work.” She leaned forwards, clearly interested. “You see, we have to be invited in.” She frowned at that.

“What do you mean?” Another coffee manifested, but I let it fall to the ground.

“Well, it’s not like we have any stupid rules like not being able to cross thresholds uninvited or anything, but we do have the ability to accept more insubstantial invitations.” I smiled at her in a way that was far from comforting.

“You see, you did something interesting by making me appear as a living god.” The room suddenly flickered, the non-reality shuddering as if struck by an immense distant blow. “You made it harder for me to feel my actual body.” The shudder came again. “At first.” She suddenly hunched in on herself, as if she had been punched. “You see, you invited me into your soul.” I stood, this time summoning my own coffee. “And, like you said, I am an abomination from beyond. A pathway to the outer darkness.” I took a sip as she crumpled to the ground. “And the darkness is always hungry.”

I could feel the threads of the void that wove through my soul spreading through her essence, carried by my spirit into the permutations of her’s. “It’s weird, isn’t it?” My awareness reached her core, and power suddenly crashed into me. This wasn’t like eating a human soul, or even a shapeshifter’s. If those had been like eating a fire and an inferno respectively, this was like trying to eat a star. An endless ocean of divine might opened to me, and subsequently crashed into my soul.

The power was terrifying. I still didn’t know for sure what The Lady really was, but she clearly had more primordial light than even my older siblings. I had never felt a god with strength like this. It was far beyond my experience, and I was trying to eat it. Well, if I didn’t explode, this was going to be quite the soul.

The coffee shop around us flickered and fuzzed, like static that had a few too many dimensions to move in. Her form, on the other hand, seemed to outright glitch out, jerkily twisting and jittering. I pulled her divinity into me, feeling a lot like an inch-wide bottomless pit that had opened up at the deepest part of the ocean. I wasn’t exactly capable of filling up, but the pressure from such an expanse was hard to control. Luckily, there was somewhere I could send it.

I reached out across the void, pulling on the tendril of my influence that allowed me to exist in this world. And, at the other end, I found another. I drew the place that wasn’t a place closer, feeling The Lady’s world, which wasn’t exactly a place itself, drawn against my own non-reality. I slowly fed one into the other, letting her world’s greater existence be subsumed by mine.

The world began to flicker between the coffee shop and a frozen battlefield, sanguine rain falling around us. The flickering increased in intensity, before finally giving out to my idea of this reality. Of course, by the time hers gave out entirely, I had already improved mine. Instead of the unchanging battlefield, there was a city all around us.

Sprawling architecture reached for the dark sky above, towers bending and twisting beyond the allowances of physical laws. Every structure was different, designed as a seemingly random hodgepodge of styles both from mortal cultures and not. The rain still fell, but it had lost its perfectly even pattern, moving and changing in an unfelt breeze as it fell. We now stood on a street of mixed and distorted materials, as the blood came down around us. “You know what?” I asked, as Lilith stepped into existence behind The Lady and wrapped one arm around her torso and the other around her neck. “I think I have some questions.”