Sitting near the balcony of my library I silently watched as the plans I have meticulously grafted gained momentum and motion.

It’s been a week since it started.

First was the selling of the unused relics and property that the family owns and next was the hunting of the beast dwelling in the forest with the use of a plan I have come up with; effectively using their meats as a source of food for the residents and other leftovers as materials to be sold as well, with last but not the least being the use of potions as fertilizer to boost crops growth and quality.

All seems to be going smoothly towards Phase 2, trading the newfound goods to nearby domains or maybe securing a good trading route and directly selling it to the main market.

Everything is going according to plan just as I predicted and written yet why……

Why can't I feel an ounce of satisfaction from the work done nor do it lift off the heavy burden on my chest?

Even if it had all stemmed out from my own selfish ego, satisfaction should have still bloomed even if it was a little yet nothing—All my chest harbors was nothing but dissatisfaction and frustration.

Gripping my armrest I sigh in exasperation as I look towards the forest outside the mansion being bathed with warm sunlight.

‘I suppose I should get going before the maids come back to check on me.’

Jumping down from my chair I walked toward my closet and quickly undressed myself.

Removing my long socks and dress, I scuffled through my wardrobe looking for something to wear for the outside, which to my dismay bear no fruition.

Everything here is just dress and gowns. It’s not surprising but it sure is annoying.

As in my old life, I’ve always preferred pants more than frilly dresses.

I mean, when you have been on the battlefield for so long, you would realize quite quickly that Dress isn’t that amazing of an option when traversing the wilderness of the outside.

Tapping my chin for a second I decided to grab the smallest dress I can find in my wardrobe which is a short white dress.

Really...? Of all colors of Dresses available is white really the smallest one?

Visibly frowning as I hold the silky cloth, I shook my head in annoyance before making my way back to the mirror beside my cabinet.

I’m not really fond of the color white, As it didn’t really blend well with my looks back in the past and adding to the fact that the color of purity isn’t really synonymous with my name.

So one could expect that the color white is one of the last colors that I would personally wear.

Though do not get me wrong, I do not feel hatred for the color white instead, I more so felt envy towards it and people who can be charming wearing it.

The feeling of pureness and simplicity is something that I honestly have been yearning for since I was still a kid.

Pure as a dove swimming in the air atop a field of flowers, as free as gracefully as it can possibly be.

….But in the end, reality gave me the exact opposite of what I wanted.

Being called the [Bloodstained Empress] or [Crimson Queen] by my enemies and allies alike really drove that fact into my mind.

Honestly, life truly has a messed-up sense of humor sometimes.

Letting out a dry chuckle I finished dressing up and meticulously tidying up my short hair in front of the mirror.

“Heh, it suited me better than expected,” I muttered out loud with wide-eyed surprise as I turned and examine the small figure of a girl reflected in the mirror.

Though it’s probably just due to the white hair I got from my mother and this new soft face of mine.

Staring at my own reflection I noticed how my wings are slowly getting more and more weird looking as sprouts of small quills had begun poking out from the fleshy bone with small bits of feathers along with it.

‘Waah, that’s disgusting to look at.’

My head on the other hand has 2 small bumps slowly protruding out of my fair skin.

Meticulously my hand began caressing the small bump on my head just as usual.

It somewhat becomes a ritual for me every time I feel lost and a bit afraid within my heart, as the sensation it gives somewhat grounds my thoughts into a clearing to pick myself back up.

Something which definitely helped me a bit from resorting to….a more bloody means of distracting my mind.

‘I guess I should rely on this more than ever…might be hard but it’s probably for the best…Yes, for the best.’

Letting out a deep brooding sigh I focused my sight back on my reflection taking in the new body parts that I will have to become acquainted with.

I’m still really not used to it like I think I am, it’s only been 4 years and it still feels surreal to have these new body parts now attached to me.

Everything about this world is still a mystery that I couldn’t even wrap my head around.

There are so many things I do not know and things I don’t know how to even begin to understand.

But despite all of that; I have to understand, I have to know, For the simple reason that I don’t know if I can move forward if I don’t know anything.

In all my life knowledge and wisdom have been the one and only thing that has propelled me forward into my desired future, so now left with not a shred of it in this new world I am now part of leaves me with nothing but fear and uncertainty.

How could I even begin to walk when I don’t even know what the road will be like.

Clenching my fist for a moment I quickly regained my composure as a bird-like creature flew by my window, its chirps and flaps forced my thoughts to a halt and back to reality.

“...Overthinking things right now will lead me nowhere I have to get moving.” Muttering those words under my breath my animals' ears twitched in response as they heard my almost inaudible murmur.

Shaking my head at the sudden remembrance of the fact that I have now such a sensitive pair of ears, I moved away from the mirror and grabbed the small brown cloak on my chair, and opened the window just shortly after.

Meeting the warm morning breeze with my face I sighed in relief as I peered out of the window and to the ground below.

Upon seeing not a single trace of anyone I quickly ran to my bed and bent down grabbing a long rope made of my clothes under it, something I have made in my free time.

“Fine, let’s do this.”

Running back to the now open window I swiftly threw the handmade rope out unto the open field below and masterfully anchored the end of it on the side rails of my balcony, as tightly as possible.

Looking down from the 3rd floor once again, I examined the landing spot of where the rope had landed, and upon scrutinizing its safety a sigh of relief escaped my lips.

Taking one last look in my room, my eyes narrowed on the analog clock hanging on top of the door.

It’s currently 9 in the morning, I have at least 3 hours before the maids come to check on me.

I can probably rely on luck that no one will accidentally come across this rope since one of the orders I gave was for the servants in the mansion to come down to the village and provide a helping hand to everyone down there.

An action that provides more manpower to the village but lowers the security inside the mansion.

That is why it took Raiden quite a lot of time to convince Mother about it during the first past days, which he ultimately succeed in but definitely came at a cost.

Speaking of Mother, it seems that even she came down to help the village which is not really a surprising action coming from her when you consider her attitude overall.

So there is that as well.

Nonetheless despite the lax security, they will still come every 3 hours to check on my well-being and said maids had already left approximately 10 minutes ago so I had about 2 and a half hours to make it to my destination and came back.

Quite a tall order but I need to do this for both my plans to continue on and more so for my curiosity to be satisfied.

Grasping the long rope I carefully slid down from the 3rd floor down to the courtyard unnoticed.

Letting out a breath of relief for my elegant landing I pulled a map out of my small pouch.

A map that contains everything about the whole domain that I have made from reference material, information from books, and gossip around the household.

It’s definitely not that accurate but even the domain map is much more confusing than mine.

I couldn’t fathom how someone can use that and not make any mistake, there aren't any names nor are there any repercussions on what a certain part of the domain contains.

However, I could just attribute that to the fact that I’m not really familiar with some of the stuff that is on the map leading to confusion on my side of things.

Looking down at my map I concluded that the path I should take is most likely down west as I ordered the bait and hunts to be done up northeast where the riverbank is located.

It gives me the upper hand since these beasts mainly operate in colonies but instead of being a group their so-called ‘colonies’ mainly operate like a hivemind with a single desire that is to consume and breed, not survival but pure gluttony and lust.

Such a vulgar way of living these animals are.

That is why when presented with an abundance of food they would not think twice but charge towards it leaving their nest unattended.

An attitude that I’m truly grateful for.

Folding the map back into my pouch I let out a sigh before covering my face with the hood of my cloak that is now concealing most of my figure.

Well, couldn’t be too careful you know. Someone might accidentally see me on my way there so best to hide my face to at least avoid being identified.

Briskly walking alone in the woods the crunching of leaves and twigs fills my surroundings as aside from the chirps of the birds from above and the buzz and crickets of the insects' around me, nothing can be heard.

Honestly, at some point, I can even feel that I might not be alone and someone is watching me but after a while, I rationalize that it’s probably just my mind playing tricks on me, a common occurrence for people in situations such as this in my opinion.

The walk to my destination was rather uneventful with not really a lot of interesting occurrences, which was something I am quite grateful for.

After all, my physical prowess might be oddly stronger than a normal 4 years old for some reason, I am still undeniably inside of a 4-year-old body so I am always in a state of being one slice away from meeting that damn God again.

A fact that I’m not really fond of.

Slowly after a while of nothing but walking a clearing comes into view and with it is a large cave filled with large scratches, sharp footprints, and most of all a putrid smell lingering in the air.

“Found it…”

The nest of the Batrols.

Sliding down a shallow slope separating the cave from the thick forest, I quickly came to a halt and doused myself with water mixed with mint before continuing any further inside.

An action that is warranted by the numerous claims that these things hated the smell of mint, a weakness that is probably due to their bat heritage.

Checking my surroundings for a bit in the case that one stray decided to stay back instead of joining the pack I carefully tread my way inside the cave.

Upon setting a single foot at the mouth of the cavern in front a disgusting smell invaded my quite sensitive nose, leading to a violent cough fit to escape my mouth.

‘Damn it the scent is actually much worse than what the books had said, I couldn’t even breath properly.’

Amidst my cough fit, A fact quickly dawned on me that continuing like this spells big trouble for my life, as my cough is getting louder and louder by the second, probably will be even more raucous than before if left unmanaged.

So with all my available physical prowess I ran out of the cave as fast as possible getting farther away from the disgusting stench.

After what seemed to be running away from the cavern for a minute or so I slowly turned my head back to where I had run away from to see that I have ran for about 15 meters away from the cave.

“Well...this is annoying..”

I muttered between short breaths as I briskly took a small dark cloth out of my pouch.

“I’m not really sure if this would work but it’s better than nothing.”

After waiting for my strength to come back and my breathing to become steady once more, I wrapped the black cloth around my face or more so my mouth and nose, covering it entirely.

It’s a handmade mask but it’s a mask nonetheless so it should work to somewhat block out the horrible stench from that cave, though how much it would block is beyond me at the moment.

Tightening the cloth around my face, I let out a deep breath as I calmed my breathing down.

As my laborious breathing subsided I hurriedly walk back to the cavern's mouth, though this time around the stench seems to have decreased a lot but not to the point the stench was non-existent but just somewhere in-between, which just provides you the leisure to ignore it.

Now covering my nose I set out into the cave once more and just like before the stench is definitely invading my nose but due to my mask, it had been lowered to a certain point that I could at least continue on forward.

Would have been better if it was lowered a bit more but this is fine I guess.

Now carefully trudging forward to the nest of these beasts, I promptly notice the waning light of the outside, which flickers ever so slightly as I continue on deeper into the cave.

Seeing that darkness will soon engulf my surroundings I swiftly took out a small rock wrapped in a black handkerchief out of my pouch.

Unwrapping the stone out of the handkerchief a sudden stream of red light radiated from the stone illuminating the room in the span of a few seconds.

These are magic stones or mostly known as core stones, stones that have been imbued with magic either artificially or naturally.

Artificially being that a person imbued the stone with a specific element, While naturally being from nature itself ranging from raging volcanoes to the coldest tundra.

Core Stones are mostly used and seen in tools & utensils here from being used as light for a lamp instead of a candle and heat for cooking instead of firewood.

And this core stone in particular is imbued with the element of fire resulting in it being hot to the touch and emitting light like a lamp.

That is why I couldn’t really hold it without the use of this thick handkerchief as it emits heat similar to that of a freshly brewed coffee.

Truly this is such a mysterious object, even if it’s been a daily tool in the households it’s still far from natural in my eyes.

Its usage and how you make one baffles me to no bounds in all honesty.

This world is certainly one weird place to live in.

I wonder how many more weird things this world can offer to my curiosity.

After a long minute of pondering back and forth about the possible application of different Magic Stones my movement came to a sudden stop, As not only that the wretched stench has gone up significantly to the point that I have to cover my face even with the mask to at least alleviate the stench but I could see numerous potholes on the ground as well.

Laying the magic stone down on the ground I carefully approached what seems to be the main nest of the Bartols.

Fecal matter and leftovers from dead animals were scattered all over the place most likely the main culprit of the stench that has been spewing out of this cave.

‘They were really are a bunch of disgusting creatures…’ I thought as moved closer to one of the potholes on the ground, carefully walking my way through the filth scattered all about.

Finally reaching one of the potholes, I slowly bent down on one knee and took out a large pouch made of leather out of the pocket of my dress that have been folded there the entire time.

Opening the folded leather I looked down with a face of indifference down the hole as I muttered, “Found you.” in complete monotone.

As down on the hole about 3 meters deep just as I expected were a bunch of eggs, eggs that belong to the Bartols.

This is what I was here for, these eggs are what I came here for.

Wiping off a slowly creeping grin on my face I slowly bent even more and began to carefully take the eggs out one by one.

They weren’t really that heavy but not that light either and if my eyes don’t deceive me they are about 7 inches in height and 6 inches in diameter and carrying one with my two hands I can roughly estimate that it’s probably 1-2 kilogram.

With this weight and size, I can probably just carry 2 or 3 depending on if this infantile body of mind could do it.

Honestly, I’m willing to bet I can only carry 2 of these eggs to the house.

Well. Better to know it now rather than just run calculations in my head.

This operation honestly wouldn’t have worked in any other creature as they definitely would have tracked me down for the eggs.

But these creatures mainly operate based on their gluttony and lust so as long as there are other sources of food and mate nearby they wouldn’t even bat an eye if 2-to-5 eggs are suddenly missing.

And add the fact that they are commonly known to be quite one of the lowest in terms of intelligence as well, So you could definitely rest assured that they can’t really track someone down that quickly and even if they do manage to track me down for some reason then I can probably just count on Raiden to get rid of them.

“This should work.”

I muttered while wiping my brow of sweat as I securely packed the 3 eggs I have stolen.

Taking any more would be a pain to carry since this feeble body is still far too weak that it’s impossible for me to do any sort of heavy lifting for a prolonged period of time.

Well, I’m still a child after all. As annoying of a fact that is.

But Yes, I will admit that I’m not really that fit either in my past life as I deemed it unnecessary to do any fighting when I could just order the people around me to do it for me.

Though despite my clear lacking of physical prowess I still could fairly hold my ground in duels with a few knights you know.

I huffed in proudness recalling a few times I bested a few knights in a light sparring match.

It’s just I didn’t like fighting in general, I rather give orders than do them myself back then, but that isn’t really an option now so I have to learn to fight as well.

I guess I’ll go train when my body is finally ready.

Checking the eggs once more to see if it’s secured, I swiftly grabbed the magic stone that I have laid on the ground and began tying it to my right arm.

Binding it in my arm in a way that it wouldn’t fall out but would still continue to emit light to the surroundings.

Though the heat it emits is definitely quite uncomfortably and a bit painful it is nonetheless just more so annoying for me.

After tightly securing the Core stone on my arm I quickly went back to the eggs inside my bag and in one swift motion, I took a deep breath in and grabbed the bag on the ground and carried it on my back.

‘T-this is a-actually heavier than expected!’

I mentally shouted as I grit through the pain in my hands and strain in my back and arms as I began to ploddingly walk out of the fusty cave.

A busy day has begun for all the maids and butlers of the Crestfallen as not only were their jobs changed but also has become even more difficult than before.

From just cleaning and tending the mansion to now farming, patrolling, and all in all, fixing everything wrong with the entire village.

So one could undoubtedly say that all of them have been exhausted to the bone with not much strength left in their body.

Yet among all of them working no one is as much as drained as these 2.

Sitting quietly with a sword and cloth at hand, Raiden carefully wipes his jet-black sword in complete silence as nearby passersby just walk passed him at quite an odd speed, an effort to avoid catching the attention of the wolfman at any given moment.

Quite the normal reaction from the normal folks, after all, His title of being a Luminary is merely second to what he was called when he was still a Knight of the kingdom, a title he had slowly come to hate but couldn’t really run away from anymore as it had already latched itself unto his name.

So he couldn’t really fault anyone when it comes to him, the fear they hold after all is more so warranted.

But still, even with that fact laid before him, he still couldn’t help but feel a bit hurt and annoyed by all those wary gazes from everyone around him.

Yet hurt as he is, he does not dare utter a single complaint.

His pride and title wouldn’t let him do so.

So with not much of a choice, he just continued polishing his signature weapon in peace—a peace that came to an end when a familiar figure approached him from the right.

“I take it you are at break right now?”

The voice queried in a rather stiff tone as it stands beside Raiden.

Seeing the figure beside himself, Raiden just let out a sigh before returning his blade back to its scabbard and turning to his right with a strained smirk.

“I take it you are either going to order me to do something or need something from me personally, Rita.”

With a confident yet tired smile, Raiden faced the snake-woman by his side as he replied back.

Unamused by Raiden’s effort in acting cheery Rita just leaned back to the wall behind both of them as she answered, “Latter.”

“Oh….Quite rare for you to ask something from me personally, What is it you need me to do this time?” Narrowing his jaded gaze to the woman in front, nearby villagers and servants had already gotten away a few feet away from the two so as to not get caught up in a possible scuffle that could happen at any moment.

A scenario that hasn’t happened in the entire history of the Crestfallen yet, but the chances of it ever occurring has never been zero.

“I don’t really need you to do something this time around, Instead I just want you to answer a few questions of mine, Is that fine?”

“Well, that depends on your questions whether I will be answering them or not.”

“That’s—…..Well, Fine.” Raising a brow from the wolfman's proposition for her request, Rita held back an irritated frown from forming on her lips as she accepted Raiden’s reasonable request.

As much as she wants him to just answer her question, She is also aware from her numerous past experience of conversing with the man that he is as stubborn as a person can be.

Annoying as it is she has no choice but to work around it.

“So…? What’s your question?” Though his words carried that same respectful playfulness he always has, a noticeable edge could still be felt within it and Rita being the nearest surely felt it more than anyone.

It is as if Raiden was indirectly telling her to not push any further, abandoning her question and turning back about her prime intent entirely.

However just as Raiden is stubborn to hide the truth about the upcoming question, Rita is equally determined to ask the truth.

So with the same determination and stubbornness as the man beside him, Rita opened her mouth and asked the question.

“The auctioning of different relics and properties, The bait plan to lure the Batrols, and most importantly The new usage of healing potions: Raiden, Who told you all of these?”

Uttering those quiet words as casual as one could possibly do so, Onlookers from afar could definitely mistake their conversation for just a casual one if it weren’t for the heavy silence that had followed soon after Rita’s question.

A question that prompted the silent wolfman a short-lived flinch.

A flinch that of course, the snake woman didn’t fail to notice.

“Are you saying everything I have told you guys have just been things someone passed on to me?” Though confidence is still apparent in his voice the wolfman still failed to mask his emotion entirely as he had done so all this time.

Well, with the question so sudden and so personal it is quite a normal reaction, to say the least.

Rita upon receiving nothing but short silence from the wolfman decided to push the nail into the coffin of her friend even further with her uncoated words.

“Raiden, Sara might have been that easy to fool but I have known you for so long that lying to me is a fools' errand. So just give up and spill the beans, at least that way you’ll keep that pride of yours intact.”

Knowing each other since they were young had come with quite a lot of cons and pros.

Advantages come in terms of understanding each other's mood and personality and Disadvantages when it comes to lying and any habits the two are unaware of.

Habits that the two are shamelessly capitalizing on when around one another.

Exploiting each other's weaknesses and strengths just to gain a step ahead of one another at a moment of notice.

One could honestly mistake them for enemies instead of childhood friends due to how ‘unique’ their relationship is from the norm.

“Your words are as blunt as ever.”

Letting a frustrated groan, Raiden seeing as the snake woman's move was to be upfront about everything, decided to do the same.

Following the rule he mindlessly abided when he was much younger; Fight fire with fire. “But I take it that you don’t have any proof for your assumptions and basically just drawing things based on your gut feeling?”, Crossing his legs he confidently smirked as he leans back to the wall behind him as well, seemingly cherishing the rare interaction they had in such a long time, ignoring the fact that at this very moment Rita is trying pry open a confidential secret he is keeping.

“I’ve never been wrong before, So I doubt I will be wrong this time.”

A soft chuckle escaped Raiden’s lips as he heard the snake woman reasoning, a way of thinking so bizarre yet something he is so familiar with at the same time.

He knows it as well deep within him that she hasn’t been wrong in all the time she had been trusting her so-called ‘gut feeling’, So as stupid as it sounds he would no doubt side with her thoughts in things more than anyone.

After all, just like she said, She’s never been wrong before, So it’s unlikely she’ll be wrong this time.

“But what if you are?”

Raiden queried in a tone tenser and stiffer than the last one he had used, a deep warning filled disgruntlement clear within his words.

A complete opposition to the mixture of panic and nostalgia his mind held at the moment.

After all, as much as he wants to tell the truth to his old friend, An order for him to conceal to truth has already been issued so with his pride and trust on the line he kept the truth as tightly as he could on his palm and tongue.

“I know that you know already whether I’m right or not, Raiden Grades.”

And Rita uncaring for his circumstance began hitting his buttons as if there is no tomorrow, An action no one would even dare to try on someone like Raiden yet here she is doing it with no regrets or fear on her face whatsoever.

Raiden’s heart on the other side of the conversation had his heart beating faster than ever before a large contrast to the peace he was just experiencing a few minutes before this conversation.

Oh, the urge to somehow ask the gods to turn back time a few minutes to a week bloomed in his heart.

The vocalization of his full name still rings through both of his ears as if some sort of bug has crawled inside of them and begun pounding it like a drum.

His hands trembled ever so slightly from the seconds that began to pass like minutes, A sentiment that is not just unique to him at the moment.

“Tell me…..Rita, Is this really a question?” Finally, after what seemed like an hour of nothing but silence between the two Personal Servants Raiden had opened his mouth, “Cause in my eyes I feel that you know the answer to your question already, so why bother asking me?” Clearing his throat the wolfman stood up and tidied up his butler uniform before formally turning to face the snake-woman beside him.

The woman in question merely smirked from the wolfman's question, a satisfied yet tired smile had crept upon her face, and the wrinkles and black spots on her face made it more apparent how much the mental and physical toll she had been under for such a long time.

Raiden as well despite being the most capable physically, has begun exhibiting hints of fatigue catching up to his body; from the ever-dropping joy on his voice slowly turning empty and tired by the day, his dry lips accompanied by his completely roughed-up face that is once as smooth and sharp as a newly forged blade.

At just one glance one could see clearly as it can be how much exhaustion they have gained and the vigor they have lost for all the years that they have been working.

And though the two was been at complete odds since ‘that day’, They still couldn’t help but mentally frown upon the state of the other person in front of them.

Raiden basically fighting the urge to berate and scold the snake-maid for slowly destroying herself for the duty she has to uphold.

While Rita holds back every scale of her being from dragging the wolfman's head into an embrace, as a way to deliver the warmth the wolfman seems to be lacking in his present self.

“.....”

A long silence between them had reappeared though this time it seems more comforting than tense and awkward, a mellow atmosphere replacing the thick air from the previous question as they continued to stare at each other's figure.

Lost within each of their own mind and thoughts their mind was abruptly brought back to reality by a cheery booming voice seemingly erupting between them.

“Sup! You two! Quite the tiring day we have don’t you think?”

Cheery and Oblivious the scent of rusting blood mixed with sweat entered the nostrils of the two adults as they both yelped from the unexpected arrival of this young woman.

“Well, even though it’s tiring beyond compare I can’t help but be pumped up with where things are going, aren’t you guys as well?” Standing proudly and impervious as ever the youth huffed out in satisfaction as the two adults on both sides just stared at her in complete surprise.

“Something wrong? You two got a heatstroke or something?”

Gaining a drop of self-awareness from the silence she had received from her unexpected arrival, the youth turns and twirls unto the two adults, examining their faces in an effort to see what seems to be the problem.

Effectively and efficiently failing to understand that the problem was she herself and her startling entrance.

“N-no, It’s nothing.” The first one to regain their composure back was Rita, shaking her head as she straightened her posture back to normality; An action followed by a disappointed quiet murmur from Raiden, “Suru….”

“Ah—…..Did...I interrupt something...?” Finally as if receiving the hint she should have gotten way long before she butted into the conversation the woman named Suru shrunk in fear as the color was drained from her face, slowly realizing what she had probably done due to her insensitivity.

“It’s fine, Suru.” Raiden being used to his cousins' antics just massage his temple as an air of acceptance escapes his nostrils.

“Ehem! Anyway…..I’m done here so I’m going back now. Stay safe you two.” Still a bit flushed for the complacency she had shown concerning her surrounding, Rita swiftly left the two on as a way to avoid the conversation to continue any further, slithering away as she waved goodbye to the two wolves.

Now left by the snake-woman in a hurry the two wolves just stood there side by side in complete silence, “Sorry, I might have butted in the middle of something important!” Breaking the stillness as quickly as it descended between them Suru instantly got down on her knees in apology for her lack of class once again.

Raiden seeing her younger cousin's familiar response to her own wrongdoings just got down on one knee and nonchalantly flicked the girl’s forehead, earning a quick groan from the girl as she stood up holding the middle of her forehead.

“You didn’t have to flick that hard!” The girl yelled with tears almost in her eyes as she carefully caressed her now red forehead.

“Well, that’s your punishment for failing to read the atmosphere again.”

With hands-on his hips Raiden just sternly told off the young woman as he began walking away from the youth, most likely going back to his post.

“I’m sorry, Okay? It’s not like I meant to butt in…..” Suru seeing the disgruntled face of her older cousin and the flushed face of her coworker Rita, just muttered in slight annoyance as she followed just a bit behind her cousin who is briskly walking away from the scene.

She knows she did something wrong but at the same time couldn’t bring herself to accept the mistake she did.

A habit that people who are close to them think might have run in the family.

And with that, the 3 oldest servants of the Crestfallen had returned to their appointed jobs acting as if nothing had happened.

Flumping down the grassy courtyard in front of my balcony my haggard breath and pumping heart are ringing through both of my ears.

“I’m going to die, I’m so tired that I feel like I’m going to die,” I muttered between the shortstop of breath as my small figure lay in the courtyard with sweat and exhaustion coursing all throughout my body.

My heart is definitely pumping at incredible speed right now, I can even feel and hear it to that point that I thought at some point it was about to burst.....shit even dying is better than this feeling!

Dammit, I really need to get stamina or just anything that could help me move more efficiently in this body.

Maybe I should ask Raiden to train me but I doubt that guy would agree to that as he would deem it ‘dangerous’ for me to do so.

I also think my mother would not agree to that saying something along the lines of ‘not appropriate for a lady or something’.

Dammit, I will think about it later for now I have to get back.

Letting down the bag I’m carrying I quickly tied it on the end of my makeshift rope, ascending first and then slowly pulling the bag up into my room last.

Finishing hauling the entire rope inside my room I rapidly turned towards the clock hanging on the ceiling.

‘Barely made it with 35 minutes remaining, gotta clean everything up before someone comes here.’

Letting out a deep sigh of relief I took one last look at the bag I have carried before undressing myself again.

A few long minutes had passed and sure enough, the maids came to check on me.

……

“….....”

“Lady Lore, is there anything you need from us?”

“Nothing really, you can take your leave now.”

“Understood.”

(Click)

“Hah….Finally alone.” Letting a sigh of relief I relished the silence within my room as I was finally left alone by the maids of this mansion.

Though it definitely took them forever to leave me alone for the devil's sake.

And can’t they hide their animosity towards me even by a little as well. After all, I’m still the daughter of the duchess, you know.

Really now, if it weren't for the fact that I’m not that stupid nor in bad mood, at the moment I would have asked for their heads in a snap.

Scratching my head in vexation for the righteous treatment I’m receiving I conservatively laid my face down on my desk.

It’s been quite some time since the servants here have started to treat me more coldly than they used to; an annoying but understandable response to what I did to their ‘Master’.

As ultimately I’m well aware what they are doing is merely purely out of loyalty to the Duchess whom they all love and serve.

But still seeing them looking at me like that is truly the most tiring part of this whole debacle, As even though I couldn’t care less about their blight towards me it is nonetheless annoying to just sit and pretend as to not notice it all.

Yet annoying and painful as this treatment is….... I couldn’t help but thrive upon such things….I wonder why.

No….I don’t think I have to wonder…I know after all why….

It brings me comfort, doesn’t it…..

Those eyes, Those blight…..

It brings me that nostalgic comfort back in my old life….

“Haha…” A dry chuckle escaped my lips as my speculation was right just as usual.

What a broken soul of a person I have become…..

To find comfort in the hatred another person harbors to oneself is a thought a normal person shouldn’t even find within the crevices of their mind yet here I am doing so.

“Well, I was not normal, to begin with….” I muttered unto the wind as I closed my eyes, taking in the stillness of my surrounding as a sign of comfort….that no one is there to judge the weakness I am showing.

I was not normal even before I was reincarnated into this world.

I was odd in every angle, to say the least…But was it my fault?

I guess it was in a way….

But...I wonder when all of their hatred towards me started showing?

Was it when I was clearly being favored by my father to take on the throne?

Was it when I was revealed to be a bastard’s child and not actually their real sister?

Was it when people started to notice I was gifted with absurd talents?

Or was it...

When I killed my damn traitorous mother, in front of all my enemies to see?

…………

……………………….

“Was I really nothing but a monster just like my father?” I muttered as I opened my eyes, a foggy vision I received, wet is the once dry table where my face lay.

Everyone has told the same thing over and over again didn’t they.

They have been telling me the truth and my fate over and over again yet did I not once listen.

I was a monster in their eyes and nothing but that.

I closed my ears off to their pleads and wishes as I continued trudging forward-thinking that my actions for everyone would paint my life in a better light.

But I didn’t….I just made everything worse just like I always do….

I’m a failure…I destroy everything I touched just like the monster I am….

I have been doing everything..wrong...all this time.

It is really all my fault to be born this way….

Everything went the way it did because of my own disgusting self.

Trying to act like I was some sort of genius and someone worthy to lead a nation only resulted in deaths and catastrophes that I couldn’t turn back and undo.

Everything was my fault…..Everything….

That is why they betrayed me, didn’t they…..

Everything I was given was everything I deserved.

All the karma and suffering that had gone on my way… it all was something that I deserved for all the sins I have committed.

That is why everyone abandoned me…

Abandoned by her...

I…shouldn’t have taken her proposal…that day

A soft inconsistent sniffle fills my room…. Sniffles my own nose was producing as I struggle to stop myself from letting out any sort of cry from my mouth.

Before I knew it my body has already been in a fetal position with my feet atop the wooden chair as I muffle the cries that I was involuntarily causing.

I wanted to be alone with only myself keeping me company and causing a ruckus due to my cries would negate that lone wish.

So I stifle my throat swallowing the cries for comfort that my body yearns for from escaping my mouth and into the ears of someone nearby.

I wanted to be alone….

Alone until I could act ‘normal’ in front of somebody again….

Alone until I could hide and ignore these indivisible scars all throughout my mind and heart.

Alone until I’m finally ready to converse with a fellow person once again…

But for now, I just wanted to be alone…

I don’t want to be seen nor be heard…

Not in this state….

So…Please….leave me alone….

…….